By: Maggz
Disclaimer: InuYasha and Co. © Rumiko Takahashi
Chapter 5
As I was finishing my shower and brushing my teeth to get ready for bed that night, I heard my bedroom door open and my sister peeked around the corner of the door... a small smile playing about her lips. "Hi there Kagome...", she said and watched as I rinsed my mouth and dried off my face. As I hung the towel back up, she reached for my hand and pulled me to my bed where she flopped down on it, pulling me with her.
"Ok… spill it…", she said and I feigned innocence. "What…?", I asked and she rolled to her side and grabbed one of my pillows, pushing it up under her head. "You had dinner with InuYasha, right?… that's what Dad said... so how did it go and what did he say... and do you have a more detailed opinion to give me of what you think of him than you did this afternoon?", she asked, studying her nails. "No... I mean… well... I was jogging... and took the turn to go down by Sakura Park... was about halfway down that road when he pulled up... and the car is very nice by the way...", I said and smiled. "I knew you'd like it... I couldn't wait for you to SEE it… he's only had it for a couple of months and it never gets driven until he's home... but isn't it perfect!?", she giggled. "Yeah... it's nice.", I laughed.
"Then what?", she asked me. "We went to some bar outside town... an older place with a band that played Japanese music.", I offered. "Japanese music in an old bar... Boy!.. InuYasha sure knows how to bring it down to your level... I've never been to that place with him... wouldn't want to go...", she said absently. I ignored the putdown and lay back on my pillow... my hands behind my neck. "Did you eat?", she asked. "Yes... we had steak and chips... it was nice... and we danced and talked... and then he brought me back home.", I said . "So?... did he say anything... anything about me... about US?", she asked, her eyes shining.
Now how was I supposed to answer that? I already felt guilty enough. I could still feel the weight of his lips against my own… the way his body had pressed into mine... and now my sister was asking me what had he said about her. "Not much... we talked more about Wild Silver... my last year away...", I started but she was onto another subject... anything that would move it back to her. "I love to go places with him, Kagome... it's so great to be recognized... and photographed... do you know we've been in all the tabloid papers not once but several times?", she laughed. "Really? I got the impression InuYasha gets tired of all that... the press...", I said. "Well… he just has to realize… and I DO remind him often… that it comes with the territory... right? it's great!", she sang and rolled off my bed… walking to the door. "I'm glad you went tonight... really.", she smiled and with that… she was gone and I was blessedly alone.
I picked up the pillow she had lain on and crushed it over my face and screamed. How in hell was I supposed to do this? why had he kissed me? and why had I liked it? My heart hammered in my chest and at last I pulled the pillow off my face and wiped at the tears of frustration as they ran down it. I'd never, ever in my life been in competiton with my sister for anything… it was as if we both came from two separate places in the world... and to think that InuYasha might stand between us was crazy.
She didn't see anything of him that I saw... she was attracted to the glow and the spotlight... I was attracted to everything that wasn't. She'd mentioned his celebrity and his car... I'd loved dancing with him in that old forgotten bar of old gents with his arms wrapped securely around me.
What was I to do? I had no idea... I wasn't going to hurt my sister… no matter what. She was family and if it meant I had to never see InuYasha again... well, that was just what might have to happen. But could I do that? I thought about it as I tossed in the bed... could I forget the softness of his mouth on mine… or the strength of his body?
I finally drifted off to sleep and slept a deep and dreamless sleep until I was awakened by my mother for breakfast the next morning.
*****
The day went nicely. Breakfast was a family affair and went off quite well. A few of my friends called that knew I was back in town and I agreed to meet them for lunch. With a promise to both Kikyo and my mom to be back in time for dinner, I pulled out of the drive in my little car that I'd had since I was 16 and went toward town. I met my friends, a group of about eight, and after hugs, tears, and laughter... found myself in a nice restaurat. We sat for hours and gossiped, promising to get together by the end of the week to catch up on anything we might have missed.
Deciding to go shopping, I went alone to my favorite boutique and looked for something suitable to wear for dinner that night. My stomach turned somersaults as I thought about InuYasha... and I growled at myself to shape up and get him off my mind before I did something I'd regret.
Shopping took up the rest of my afternoon... truth was... all my clothes were standard college issue... baggy and plain... and I had nothing that would fit me now in my closet. I'd went down two sizes since I'd moved away, so I had a major time finding anything that I liked. I finally settled on a sheer ivory silk overshirt with an ivory camisole underneath. A midthigh black lycra mini skirt with a pair of black leather slides completed the outfit. Looking at my watch, I saw I had enough time to go for new makeup and in another half hour I was on my way home. Kikyo was pacing the front porch as I pulled my car into the garage.
"Where have you BEEN?", she hissed as she looked at my shopping bags. "I went to find something suitable for dinner tonight, I've nothing in my closet I can wear now.", I said. "Jeez! couldn't you have at least called!?", she cried and went inside, slamming the door behind her. "Kikyo… I told you I would be home… it will only take me a bit to get dressed!", I yelled as I followed her inside. "You didn't have to make me worry!", she said and her brown eyes blazed at me. "I'm sorry, OK?", I said and started up the steps to my room. "InuYasha will be here in half an hour... hurry UP!", she said and stalked to her room to finish getting ready.
I showered quickly and applied my makeup. Getting dressed and twisting my hair up into a loose twist, I grabbed my shoes and looked at the clock. It had been 45 minutes and I was sure Kikyo was ready to take my bedroom door down. I sighed and checked myself in the mirror before leaving the room. For some reason, the girl in the mirror didn't look like me at all... and I smiled. I didn't feel like me either.
I walked down the steps, hearing voices in the living room... making out InuYasha's low laughter and my Dad's voice along with Kikyo's. Stepping into the living room, I smiled when everyone's eyes swung to me. "Sorry, if I held everybody up.", I said, noticing Kikyo's frown. "It's OK, Kagome... you look very lovely.", my Dad commented. I don't think he'd seen me dressed up since I was a little girl and if he had… it had only been for a short while. "Yes… very lovely, Kagome", InuYasha said softly and my eyes swung to him as he moved off the sofa to stand in front of me. His eyes... again... unreadable and I swallowed past the lump in my throat… as I remembered the kiss. Kikyo had stood by then and came to stand next to InuYasha... and I turned and smiled at her as I thanked InuYasha for his compliment.
"Dinner's ready!", my mom sang and we all walked into the dining room together. Kikyo had chosen a pale green sheath that hit her just above the knee with matching strappy sandals. She stood just a bit taller than InuYasha and walked with her arm linked thru his. InuYasha had dressed nicely, I noticed. He wore charcoal gray trousers and a cream colored sweater... he looked divine, I thought as I studied him from behind and smiled. My Dad pulled out my chair, across from InuYasha and Kikyo while he and my mom sat at either end. The dinner table was loaded with all sorts of goodies and InuYasha complimented every dish.
It was hard to eat with him sitting across from me... for every time I would raise my eyes to answer a question or take a sip of my water, he'd be looking at me. Kikyo hung on his every word and I listened to the two of them unobserved… or at least that's what I thought. Conversation soon turned to my schooling and my mom started at once where she always liked to tread.
"It's such a good thing Kagome's so smart!", she sang. "Oh yes? why is that?", InuYasha asked, taking her bait and I groaned inwardly. "Well, InuYasha... you can see the difference in my two girls, I'm sure... Kikyo's the beautiful one... and Kagome has the brains...", she announced happily… as if she were bragging. InuYasha's eyes shot to me and I looked down at once, reaching for my water glass and knocking it over. "Oh, Kagome!", my mom cried and hopped up from the table to grab a towel. My face felt like it was on fire... if I could've sunk into the floor at that moment, I would have... gratefully. InuYasha had jumped up to help my mom and took the offered towel... coming to my side of the table. I reached for it… a sob catching in my throat and he must've heard... for his eyes swung back to mine again. "It's ok, Darling... I've got it...", he said and soaked up the water on the linen tablecloth. "I think I'm finished, mom... Dad... may I be excused for now.", I said. "Sure", my Dad said and I pushed back my chair... headed for the front porch. I felt InuYasha's eyes on my back as I swung open the door and went to the nearest place for comfort I could find... the giant shade tree in the back yard that I'd always gone to as a child when the pain and hurt grew too harsh.
I wrapped my arms around the tree and sank my forehead into it's bark... worn smooth from years of my love and need. Sliding my shoes off, I let my feet sink into the cool green grass and waited for the blood to quit rushing to my head. I never heard him approach from behind me until he was at my side, his arm propped on the tree. "Kagome... I'm so sorry.", he said and I shook my head. "No… it's not your fault InuYasha... and I'm sorry I let it affect me in front of you…", I said. "But... your mother...?', he said softly and I looked at him. "She has no idea how it affects me... and my Dad… he won't say a thing to her… even if he noticed.", I said. "But it's so untrue… and so unfair... I just don't understand why it doesn't offend Kikyo... she never acted as if it bothered her.", he said. "It doesn't, InuYasha... because my mom has drilled it into her head all these years… she's the pretty one... I'm the smart good girl...", I said.
He walked in front of me and stood there... until I looked up at him. "Dear God...", he said softly..."and you believe it... you actually believe you're not beautiful... dear God!", he said and reached out a hand to brush a tear from my cheek. "I'm brilliant, InuYasha… smart... a good girl...", I said and he shook his head. "That's not all... no... that's not all, Kagome... it amazes me that you don't see it when you look in the mirror... do you NOT see it?", he asked me. "See what, InuYasha...?', I asked him, puzzled now. "Sweetheart, you're beyond lovely... I could take you with me to meet the rest of the guys and they'd fall all over themselves to impress you!", he said. "Oh… InuYasha... please… don't...", I said softly and looked down. "No… I won't… I won't stop until I get you to see the beauty you are... you must promise me something.", he said and I looked up again... curious as to what he would say. "Promise me when you go inside tonight... when you're all alone in your room... that you'll look in that mirror and you'll see… really SEE who you are and what you are!", he said.
"I was going to tell you tonight that I was sorry for the kiss...", he said softly and I blushed. "It's OK, InuYasha... I think I understand... you were trying to make me feel better...", I said and smiled. "NO…", he said emphatically and I raised a brow at him. "NO?", I echoed. "No... I kissed you... because I wanted to... because I felt like it...because you made me do it just by being with you and being close to you...", he said. "I don't understand...", I said. "You don't have to... just know it wasn't wrong and that I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat... you're lovely, Kagome... please see that...", he said softly and ran a finger underneath my chin.
"I'm off with Kikyo now... a party... do you want to come?", he asked me. "No... no... go on... I've got plans...", I said and he nodded and put his hands in his pockets. "You looked like an angel coming down those stairsteps tonight... you fair took me breath away.", he smiled. "You're too sweet, InuYasha Hara... for your own good... too sweet... don't get hurt.", I said softly and he frowned at me… cocking his head to the side. "I won't, Kagome... trust me...", he said.
Kikyo appeared around the edge of the house and called for InuYasha. He pushed out his lower lip and pouted at me... and I had to laugh. "You use that one when you want to get your way, right?", I grinned. "Sometimes...", he said and backed away from me slowly... going to my sister... leaving. I saw him hook an arm around her shoulders and pull her close to him... as I mentioned before, they made a beautiful couple. At that moment, I decided to try to compose my feelings for InuYasha as they should be... as a good friend... how was I supposed to know what would happen between us... what was in store for us that it seemed neither of us had control over...??
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A/N: Review! Reviews make me happy! ^_^
Maggz