When He Was Mine

By: Maggz

Disclaimer: InuYasha and Co. © Rumiko Takahashi

Chapter 32

We were soon on our way driving along a familiar stretch of highway. "Do you know where we're going now, Kagome?", he asked me as he grabbed my hand. I had been looking out the window of the car, watching the scenery as we drove by, thinking of how very nice it was for InuYasha to be home... 'home' with me. I turned to him now and smiled. I knew where we were going.

"Yeah, I know where we're going.", I said and touched his cheek. He smiled and looked back at the road, taking me to where we had first kissed, taking me to the bar we had first been alone at together.

We pulled into the parking lot and InuYasha cut the engine and turned to me. Few cars were there at this time of the day so we had no stray fans to worry about. He took both of my hands in his and held them, smiling at me.

"Quiet and private, just for us. And reminds of me of when we first came here. I already knew I wanted you.", he said. "Oh really? And you belonged to my sister then. How strange...", I said and smiled a bit. "Does that bother you still, Kagome? It shouldn't and I don't want it to but I can see how it would. Listen, let me tell you something. Maybe it will make you feel better about it...", he said. "No, I'd rather NOT hear anything about you and Kikyo, InuYasha. Just drop it, ok?", I said and pulled my hands from his, reached for the door handle and got out.

"Wait, Kagome. Damn it!", I heard him say and before I had my car door fully closed and walked two steps, I could hear him behind me swearing. "Fuck! What in hell did I SAY?", he asked as his hands caught me around my waist and pulled me sharply back against him. I pushed at his hands and strained against him but he was stronger and held me tight. "I'm not letting you go, baby. Struggle all you want but I'm not letting you GO!", he whispered into my ear.

I noticed a couple of guys leaving the bar, now with their curious gaze on us. "Stop it, Kagome. Stop it now...", InuYasha said and because the guys were headed our way with concern on their faces. I ceased fighting against InuYasha and put on my best smile.

"Is everything OK here?", the biggest guy asked, looking only at me. "Yes, everything is fine. Right, baby?", InuYasha said. The guys ignored him and continued looking at me. "I'm asking the lady... Is everything alright?", he said once more. InuYasha nudged me in my side and I nodded. "Sure?", the guy said once more and I nodded again, more convincingly, and smiled wider. "Ok, I just wanted to make sure...", he said and turned away, looking back once and shaking his head, probably wondering what in hell was going on.

"Damn, Kagome. You wanna get me into a fight?", InuYasha said and I noticed his hands were still about my waist. I moved my hands to his and pushed them off me. It did no good; he wrapped an arm around my waist and turned me to him, pushing me up against the car. He was smiling and it infuriated me!

"God, I love when you get all fiery and passionate. Shit! You got me hard!" he grinned and I refused to look at him, biting the inside of my cheek to hide the smile that threatened to spill from me. "Smile at me, Kagome. I see you fighting it!", he said and pressed himself to me. "Damn you, InuYasha!", I said and finally looked into his golden eyes. "Damn ME?", he asked and poked out his lower lip. It won't work, InuYasha, not this time...", I said and he shuffled his feet and poked the lip out further, looking down and back up at me. "Stop with that!", I said and tried to move away from him but he held me prisoner against the car still.

"Let's go eat, please!", he begged and I only nodded. He eased up off me and grabbed my hand, pulling me toward the place. We went inside; not many customers were there and InuYasha walked on to the same back table he and I had occupied on our trip there before. "There, see? Everything's perfect, we have our very own table and we can dance and eat..." he was saying. "I'm NOT dancing with you.", I said still a bit angry at him.

I knew it made no sense. I had known he was Kikyo's boyfriend and he and I had gotten together almost too soon after they had broken up. But I had been helpless to stop my attraction to him and it seemed the same way with him. So why was I angry at him now? He had only wanted to explain something to me, trying to ease my mind and I had blown up, pouted, acted spoiled, selfish, and jealous. I supposed I just didn't like to even think that the man that I now was hopelessly falling in love with could have ever loved my sister, slept with her...

InuYasha pushed me down into the booth, and instead of sitting across from me, he pushed me over and sat down next to me trapping me between him and the wall. He turned to me, his knee pulled up onto the bench and pressing against my thigh. "Don't be mad at me, Kagome, please?", he said softly. "I'm not.", I said. "You are!", he insisted and I shook my head. "I'm over it!", I said and he shook his head. "You know I love you, don't you?", he asked. "Yes.", I said and looked down at the table. He hooked a finger under my chin and pulled my face up to meet his gaze. "You HAVE to know I love you, Kagome. And even if you don't want to think about it, I WAS involved with Kikyo. But what I wanted to say to you was this... it was never, ever like THIS. Like what I feel for you and with you, understand?", he asked. "Kind of...", I said lowly.

"She's not YOU. You're... you're so much more. You make me so happy and relaxed. I love you without even thinking about it, or trying... It just happened...", he said. I looked at him, wondering if he even realized what he was doing to me. My heart felt like it could burst with happiness but I didn't want to let myself just 'let go' like that with him. Not just yet.

"Don't you love me?", he asked. I just nodded my head. So much I COULD say but I wouldn't. Not now, not yet. "Can't you even SAY it? Just... just this once?", he asked. "I do, InuYasha, you KNOW that!", I smiled. "Ok, I won't push you. I'm sorry... You want to dance? Will you?", he asked, changing the subject, but not before I saw the look of pain on his face. Pain and surprise. I didn't want to hurt him, I would never do that, but it would be so very damned easy for him to hurt me. And I had to protect myself somehow, someway. I could love him and still keep a barrier up between myself and my heart.

I smiled at him and watched as he scooted out of the booth, then grabbed my hands and pulled me to my feet. He led me to the old polished oak dance floor and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close. The music... ahhh... it was a beautiful as it had been the very first time, and I closed my eyes and let myself relax in InuYasha's arms. I felt his lips as he pressed them to the top of my head and kissed me there, and I sighed deeply. "Love you.", he whispered and I cuddled into him deeper and moved slowly with him to the music.

We danced to the end of the song and I heard his tummy rumble again as it had at the apartment. "C'mon, InuYasha. Let's order up some food. That steak and chips is sounding better and better!", I smiled and this time it was me that was leading him off the floor and back to the booth. I slid into the seat and he moved across from me this time. The waitress soon came over and with a smile at InuYasha, asked for our orders. It wasn't long before she had brought back two beers for us and InuYasha grinned as I tipped my mug back and drank deeply.

"I love to see you do that.", he laughed. "Oh yeah? It's a disgrace to Kikyo and my mom!", I laughed and then stopped suddenly. Why had I even brought up Kikyo's name again? InuYasha saw the smile leave my face and he sat his mug down and took my hand. "Kagome, look... Can't you see how much you mean to me? Is it that hard? Don't I show you enough? Tell you enough?", he asked and his eyes were clouded with worry. "You do, InuYasha, but you have to remember. We haven't been together very long or very much. It'll take time.", I said. "I guess it just seems longer to me. I feel like I've been with you forever. I felt like that the very first time I held you in my arms.", he said and squeezed my hands. "You're so sweet.", I said and looked down at the table.

"I never loved her, Kagome. I wouldn't lie about that to you.", he said after awhile, and it was uttered very softly... so softly that I thought I had misunderstood him. "What did you say?", I asked him. "I said, I never loved your sister, never. You may think me callous or unfeeling. It may make you hate me but I need to be honest with you and I'm not just saying this. It's true, I never loved her." he said. "I think I know that InuYasha, really. I think I knew it from the very first time. You were too good for her, trust me.", I said and stroked my fingers over his hands. "You knew?", he asked, looking deeply into my eyes. "Yeah, I knew and maybe HOPED.", I laughed a little and he chuckled.

"I guess that's why it didn't bother me so much when you and I made love at the cabin. At least that's what I tell myself.", I said. "Then you'd be correct. I never loved her and I think we really 'broke up' way before that night at the party. I just didn't have the time, patience or maybe courage to break up with her before then, but when you came into my life... oh shit, Kagome, please believe me when I say I fell for you very fast. It took everything in me not to run off with you the first time I laid eyes on you." he smiled. "I wouldn't have objected, InuYasha. You could've just smiled at me and said 'Let's go' and I'd have done it.", I said.

Our food came then and we were soon eating hungrily, both of us starving. All that lovemaking had made us hungry. We took our time, danced two more songs, sat back and had two more beers and then left to go back to the apartment.

We were both silent on the way back home but he reached for my hand as soon as we started home and held it until we pulled up in front of the apartment. He cut the engine and before I knew it, he had pulled me into his arms across the car seat. His lips were warm on mine. I could taste the beer on his lips and tongue and I sucked on it eagerly. I heard him moan into my mouth, felt his hold on me tighten, his hands move up under my sweatshirt and I braced myself. InuYasha's hands on my skin were a feeling I'd never forget as long as I lived.

He pulled back from me and kissed my forehead, smoothing my hair back behind my ear. "Let's go inside. I got two surprises for you.", he grinned and I laughed. "Noooo, I mean it!", he said and I hugged him tight. "You're one in a million, InuYasha. If I died tonight, I'd go a happy girl. I mean that!", I said suddenly and he smiled then, real big. I suppose he realized that saying that was the closest I could come to an outright 'I Love You'. Somehow saying it while in the throes of an orgasm, in passion, just didn't seem the same as coming out and saying it face to face without the lovemaking.

"C'mon, Kagome.", he said and pulled me across his lap and out his side of the car.

"Two surprises?", I giggled again and he slapped my bum and winked. "Two, and you owe me BIG TIME for one of them!", he laughed.

A/N: Review! Reviews make me happy!

Maggz