Summary: This is the 3rd part to "A Way With Words", the sequel to A
Tribute to a Man.
It was eleven a.m. Buffy stumbled out of her bedroom and into the joining living room/kitchen of her small L.A. apartment. She took her Cap'n Crunch out of the cabinet, poured it into a bowl and added the milk. Then she took her breakfast over to the navy blue sofa and sat down, not surprised in the least bit by the tears coursing down her face. She was used to it by now. It was her routine. She'd get up; eat a small breakfast; watch a little TV; and cry all day. Then, she would slump into bed and cry herself to sleep. Ever since that day in the cemetery. Ever since her speech about him. Spike.
She sobbed harder.
God she missed him. She missed him so much. She thought about him every second of her day. Everything seemed to remind her of him. Every thought seemed to strike up another memory. She couldn't look at Hawaiian shirts anymore. Or wedding dresses, they reminded her of "the spell". Sometimes, when she passed a leather store on the streets of Los Angelus, she would walk in just to smell that familiar sent. His sent. The sent of his leather duster swirling around her as they fought, or kissed. But it was never the same. She wanted the smell of worn out leather, alcohol, blood, and the other key scents that made it purely Spike.
The one question she always wound up asking herself was why. She knew it was his destiny to wear the amulet and save them all. But why did he have to stay in the hellmouth once his job was done? The ubervamps were dust in the non-existent wind. The First was defeated. So why didn't he save himself?
["Go! It's for me to do the cleanup!"]
She remembered him saying that, yelling for her to go and let him sacrifice himself to ensure that the Hellmouth was closed for good.
["Go! I want to see how it ends."]
God! Didn't he know how much she needed him?! How she didn't know how to survive with out him?! Didn't he know how much she loved him? 'Of course he didn't know, Dumbass. You never allowed yourself to tell him. You waited so long to finally admit it, and he didn't believe you!' She thought bitterly as she cried even harder. She put her uneaten bowl of cereal down on the end table beside her.
["I love you" "No, you don't. But thanks for sayin' it"]
He never knew! She was so involved with her own selfish insecurities to tell him the truth. I was horrible to him! And know he'll never know! He's-
She was torn out of her thoughts when the doorbell rang. She staggered over and opened the door, not even bothering to look through the peephole or to wipe the tears still streaming down her face.
TBC...........
REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1
Email: Iluv_spike@yahoo.com
It was eleven a.m. Buffy stumbled out of her bedroom and into the joining living room/kitchen of her small L.A. apartment. She took her Cap'n Crunch out of the cabinet, poured it into a bowl and added the milk. Then she took her breakfast over to the navy blue sofa and sat down, not surprised in the least bit by the tears coursing down her face. She was used to it by now. It was her routine. She'd get up; eat a small breakfast; watch a little TV; and cry all day. Then, she would slump into bed and cry herself to sleep. Ever since that day in the cemetery. Ever since her speech about him. Spike.
She sobbed harder.
God she missed him. She missed him so much. She thought about him every second of her day. Everything seemed to remind her of him. Every thought seemed to strike up another memory. She couldn't look at Hawaiian shirts anymore. Or wedding dresses, they reminded her of "the spell". Sometimes, when she passed a leather store on the streets of Los Angelus, she would walk in just to smell that familiar sent. His sent. The sent of his leather duster swirling around her as they fought, or kissed. But it was never the same. She wanted the smell of worn out leather, alcohol, blood, and the other key scents that made it purely Spike.
The one question she always wound up asking herself was why. She knew it was his destiny to wear the amulet and save them all. But why did he have to stay in the hellmouth once his job was done? The ubervamps were dust in the non-existent wind. The First was defeated. So why didn't he save himself?
["Go! It's for me to do the cleanup!"]
She remembered him saying that, yelling for her to go and let him sacrifice himself to ensure that the Hellmouth was closed for good.
["Go! I want to see how it ends."]
God! Didn't he know how much she needed him?! How she didn't know how to survive with out him?! Didn't he know how much she loved him? 'Of course he didn't know, Dumbass. You never allowed yourself to tell him. You waited so long to finally admit it, and he didn't believe you!' She thought bitterly as she cried even harder. She put her uneaten bowl of cereal down on the end table beside her.
["I love you" "No, you don't. But thanks for sayin' it"]
He never knew! She was so involved with her own selfish insecurities to tell him the truth. I was horrible to him! And know he'll never know! He's-
She was torn out of her thoughts when the doorbell rang. She staggered over and opened the door, not even bothering to look through the peephole or to wipe the tears still streaming down her face.
TBC...........
REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1
Email: Iluv_spike@yahoo.com