You can't back out of a dare that you dare someone else to do. I moved a
little closer to Tawny, and we leaned our faces together. For what seemed
like forever we sat there with our noses centimeters apart and our eyes
open, staring at one another. She blinked once. I couldn't take my eyes off
of her. She swallowed, and in the silence I heard it. I also heard my heart
sounding like it was going to force its way out of my chest and make a big
mess on everyone. She shut her eyes, and leaned in closer to me. As I shut
my eyes, and felt her lips against mine. Unconsciously, and I'd like to
say, unwillingly, I moved my hands up to her sides.
"Work it! Work it!" Larry couldn't contain himself, and he yelled out.
I smiled, breaking the kiss. Then I began to laugh, but it was more of a giggle, I'm not sure why, and I leaned my forehead onto Tawny's shoulder and continued to do so. I heard her begin to laugh, and I couldn't hear anyone in the room but her now. She hugged me, and I put my arms around her. Maybe now that I'd kissed her I'd be over this phase I was going through, and I'd like males again. Maybe now all the stupid urges would stop, and we could be normal again. I hate not knowing things, and being unsure, and confused. It wasn't me, at all.
"Happy birthday." She said softly.
"Holy shit, do that again, dude..." Twitty sputtered, interrupting whatever kind of moment we were having or about to have.
"It's my turn to ask, yo...I'll make 'em do it again..." Larry's drunkenness began to show a little. He twitched with excitement. "Oh my God! Ren, I dare you to do that again!"
"Larry, you're not going in the circle...and you're supposed to give me the option to say truth, remember?"
"Eh..."
"I'm the only one that hasn't used my truth yet." I reminded him.
"Oh yah..." he mumbled, scratching his head, "Truth or dare?"
"Truth." I said, sneering. He'd obviously given up on the whole circle thing now.
"Oh...errr...uh...You, Ren, who do you like?!"
He was hoping I would say Tawny, so that we could put on a show for them, and I knew it. "No one." I responded. I looked at Tawny out of the corner of my eye, and she was looking upset. Why would she be upset that I didn't like her? She wouldn't. I was imagining it. My stupid urges weren't content with just that one kiss, but I didn't want to do more with her, ever, especially in front of people, so I again said, "No one, at all."
"Damn girl, you lie!" He protested, "You're supposed to tell the truth! That ain't it!"
Bobby mumbled something, and then said, "Alright, Ren I dare you to do it again, and you can't get out of it this time!"
I sighed. Every guy was going to dare me to do the same thing over and over until they got braver and dared me to do something more, but it was okay at the moment because I needed to rid myself of the damned impulses. "Tawny, you don't mind do you?"
She shook her head, and blushed slightly, "Nah, it's fine."
Why'd she blush? I pushed it to the back of my head. "Ok." I took a deep breath, and gently pressed my lips to hers. They were warm and moist, tasted faintly of vanilla from her lip gloss that had long since rubbed off, and I didn't want to stop. I wanted to do more. Damn impulses and urges or whatever they are!
"Tongue! You need tongue!" Larry yelled, sounding very frustrated.
Tawny pulled away, and I glared at him. He interrupted the satisfaction of the evil urges, and angered me.
"Ren," Tawny whispered, "I really need to tell you something."
"Tell me." I said quickly.
"I..."
"My turn!" yelled Mona, "Enough of the lesbian action! I dare Ruby to blow Larry!" She cackled evilly. Larry's rules, about going in the circle, and asking everyone had been forgotten by this time, completely.
Ruby's eyes grew wide, "No!"
"What?! I know you like me!" Shouted Larry. "You wanna have sex with me!"
"She's got things..." Donnie pointed out, having remembered from earlier.
"Condom things." Twitty laughed.
"Fine!" Ruby yelled in Mona's face, "Let's go in the kitchen!"
Larry jumped up.
"Not in the kitchen!" I screamed.
"Where then?!" Ruby snapped at me, uncharacteristically. Substances made her act different.
"Go outside or something!" I was about to pull my hair out.
She grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the back door.
"Man, I want someone to give me head." Bobby whined. "Why the hell didn't you invite...um...what's her face...Ren? That really slutty girl..."
"Bobby, shut up or get out." I told him. Everyone was driving me insane, if I wasn't already.
He stood up, without saying anything grabbed his stuff and walked out of the front. I sighed, very relieved once he was gone. Everyone else started mumbling amongst themselves, quietly, fearing my wrath. Donnie and Twitty kept poking each other, and I didn't know what was going on there, didn't really want to. Louis was doing some bonding with Monique and Mona, very quietly.
As I looked around at everything. I felt slightly relieved like I was in control again, but then I felt Tawny's hands on my shoulders. When I turned to look at her, she kissed me, abruptly. It surprised me and my body got extremely stiff and tense. I had no idea what to do.
She let go of me and backed away, "Sorry."
"It's...it's..." I tried to figure out what 'it' was. I want to take her away from all this, from all these people, and the chaos, and I want to lock her in my room, and never let her out, so that no one can have her, but me. Did that mean I was in love with Tawny? I don't know. I don't know what being in love is like. I know very little, though I get straight As and I'm the president of everything. "It's ok."
"Ren...I..."
"Dude, they were just kissing again..." Twitty told Donnie.
"My lil' sis has a new boyfriend...and it's a girl." was Donnie's response.
Louis looked at us, we were just sitting there. "Man, this isn't right..."
"What isn't right?" Asked Monique.
"Yeah...what?" Mona was seeming a little disoriented.
"Who?" Twitty asked, very confused.
Donnie laughed, "Shut up. I can't think..."
"You can never think." Louis mumbled.
"Be nice." Said Monique.
"What she said." Mona was losing her touch. "I don't wanna go home! I wanna stay with you!" She latched onto her leader's arm.
"Who has rice?" Twitty asked.
Within minutes everyone was yelling for one reason or another, and Larry wasn't in the house to maintain the calm anymore. I didn't feel like being in control. I wanted a moment completely lacking control. No one was paying attention as I grabbed Tawny's hand and led her upstairs.
"Work it! Work it!" Larry couldn't contain himself, and he yelled out.
I smiled, breaking the kiss. Then I began to laugh, but it was more of a giggle, I'm not sure why, and I leaned my forehead onto Tawny's shoulder and continued to do so. I heard her begin to laugh, and I couldn't hear anyone in the room but her now. She hugged me, and I put my arms around her. Maybe now that I'd kissed her I'd be over this phase I was going through, and I'd like males again. Maybe now all the stupid urges would stop, and we could be normal again. I hate not knowing things, and being unsure, and confused. It wasn't me, at all.
"Happy birthday." She said softly.
"Holy shit, do that again, dude..." Twitty sputtered, interrupting whatever kind of moment we were having or about to have.
"It's my turn to ask, yo...I'll make 'em do it again..." Larry's drunkenness began to show a little. He twitched with excitement. "Oh my God! Ren, I dare you to do that again!"
"Larry, you're not going in the circle...and you're supposed to give me the option to say truth, remember?"
"Eh..."
"I'm the only one that hasn't used my truth yet." I reminded him.
"Oh yah..." he mumbled, scratching his head, "Truth or dare?"
"Truth." I said, sneering. He'd obviously given up on the whole circle thing now.
"Oh...errr...uh...You, Ren, who do you like?!"
He was hoping I would say Tawny, so that we could put on a show for them, and I knew it. "No one." I responded. I looked at Tawny out of the corner of my eye, and she was looking upset. Why would she be upset that I didn't like her? She wouldn't. I was imagining it. My stupid urges weren't content with just that one kiss, but I didn't want to do more with her, ever, especially in front of people, so I again said, "No one, at all."
"Damn girl, you lie!" He protested, "You're supposed to tell the truth! That ain't it!"
Bobby mumbled something, and then said, "Alright, Ren I dare you to do it again, and you can't get out of it this time!"
I sighed. Every guy was going to dare me to do the same thing over and over until they got braver and dared me to do something more, but it was okay at the moment because I needed to rid myself of the damned impulses. "Tawny, you don't mind do you?"
She shook her head, and blushed slightly, "Nah, it's fine."
Why'd she blush? I pushed it to the back of my head. "Ok." I took a deep breath, and gently pressed my lips to hers. They were warm and moist, tasted faintly of vanilla from her lip gloss that had long since rubbed off, and I didn't want to stop. I wanted to do more. Damn impulses and urges or whatever they are!
"Tongue! You need tongue!" Larry yelled, sounding very frustrated.
Tawny pulled away, and I glared at him. He interrupted the satisfaction of the evil urges, and angered me.
"Ren," Tawny whispered, "I really need to tell you something."
"Tell me." I said quickly.
"I..."
"My turn!" yelled Mona, "Enough of the lesbian action! I dare Ruby to blow Larry!" She cackled evilly. Larry's rules, about going in the circle, and asking everyone had been forgotten by this time, completely.
Ruby's eyes grew wide, "No!"
"What?! I know you like me!" Shouted Larry. "You wanna have sex with me!"
"She's got things..." Donnie pointed out, having remembered from earlier.
"Condom things." Twitty laughed.
"Fine!" Ruby yelled in Mona's face, "Let's go in the kitchen!"
Larry jumped up.
"Not in the kitchen!" I screamed.
"Where then?!" Ruby snapped at me, uncharacteristically. Substances made her act different.
"Go outside or something!" I was about to pull my hair out.
She grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the back door.
"Man, I want someone to give me head." Bobby whined. "Why the hell didn't you invite...um...what's her face...Ren? That really slutty girl..."
"Bobby, shut up or get out." I told him. Everyone was driving me insane, if I wasn't already.
He stood up, without saying anything grabbed his stuff and walked out of the front. I sighed, very relieved once he was gone. Everyone else started mumbling amongst themselves, quietly, fearing my wrath. Donnie and Twitty kept poking each other, and I didn't know what was going on there, didn't really want to. Louis was doing some bonding with Monique and Mona, very quietly.
As I looked around at everything. I felt slightly relieved like I was in control again, but then I felt Tawny's hands on my shoulders. When I turned to look at her, she kissed me, abruptly. It surprised me and my body got extremely stiff and tense. I had no idea what to do.
She let go of me and backed away, "Sorry."
"It's...it's..." I tried to figure out what 'it' was. I want to take her away from all this, from all these people, and the chaos, and I want to lock her in my room, and never let her out, so that no one can have her, but me. Did that mean I was in love with Tawny? I don't know. I don't know what being in love is like. I know very little, though I get straight As and I'm the president of everything. "It's ok."
"Ren...I..."
"Dude, they were just kissing again..." Twitty told Donnie.
"My lil' sis has a new boyfriend...and it's a girl." was Donnie's response.
Louis looked at us, we were just sitting there. "Man, this isn't right..."
"What isn't right?" Asked Monique.
"Yeah...what?" Mona was seeming a little disoriented.
"Who?" Twitty asked, very confused.
Donnie laughed, "Shut up. I can't think..."
"You can never think." Louis mumbled.
"Be nice." Said Monique.
"What she said." Mona was losing her touch. "I don't wanna go home! I wanna stay with you!" She latched onto her leader's arm.
"Who has rice?" Twitty asked.
Within minutes everyone was yelling for one reason or another, and Larry wasn't in the house to maintain the calm anymore. I didn't feel like being in control. I wanted a moment completely lacking control. No one was paying attention as I grabbed Tawny's hand and led her upstairs.