The wandering Bakura continued to (duh duh dum...) wander aimlessly. His
feet carried him to a clearing, and he followed them. He saw the two beings
laying heaped at the base of a tree. "What the...?" he murmured but his
feet refused to stop walking.
*Crack!*
Bakura walked directly into the tree and fell on top of Gollum with a bone- jarring thud. All three were motionless. Joey had actually been about to wake, but Bakura's falling on top of Gollum on top of him had knocked him back out. They lay underneath the tree, Gollum snoring gently.
The tree watched them for a moment, then gleefully thought, "Yay! Another one! That brings my tally to four! Oh, Elbereth and Vallor, what a busy day! Wait until Treebeard hears..." then it went about its business of silently attracting people to it (so they would whack into it) like moths to a flame.
~*~
A random moth flew over to the authoresses and yelled, "Hey, I resent that!" It then flew away. The authoresses stared at its retreating form.
~*~
Sam and Frodo, enjoying a rare moment of silence in this hectic story, watched in mild amusement as the Nazgul tried to mount flat, blue dragons. It didn't work, obviously. The Nazgul's old dragons, depressed and feeling unloved, flew away.
~*~
Aragorn yelled when a Nazgul-ian dragon appeared through the canopy.
"What is that?" Seto asked.
But when the dragon didn't attack, Aragorn seemed to have gotten an idea.
~*~
The lead Nazgul clutched tightly to the Blue Eyes White Dragon's head, the other mounted Nazgul doing likewise. They lifted slowly into the air. Certainly, these dragons were difficult to ride, but the pretty colors were worth it!
Suddenly, two more dragons appeared. One was flat and yellow, Yami standing proudly on its over-large head. The other was...
"ScreeeEEch!" One Nazgul screeched.
"Eech? ScrEE?" Another asked.
Translation: "Traitor!" "Isn't that my dragon?"
The previously-Nazgul-ian dragon bore Aragorn on its back.
Just then, a shout pierced through the air. Seto clung desperately to the Curse of Dragon (the flat one)'s tail.
"Get your own dragon, Kaiba!" Yami roared.
"I... can't! No... more... dragon... cards... in my... deck!" came the reply.
For a moment, Yami toyed with the idea of letting his archrival fall to his demise. Then, he realized that his light would probably be eternally angry, and thus might cut off Yami's sugar supply.
With a sigh, Yami heaved Seto up (none too gently), then returned to his place at the dragon's head.
"SCRRR.....!" A Nazgul cried, sounding remarkably like a can-opener.
Translation: "Attack!"
Aragorn, Yami, and Seto's eyes all widened as their own dragons screeched towards them. Curse of Dragon easily took out Winged Dragon, Guardian of the Fortress #1, but the Blue Eyes (that's plural...?) were too strong.
"Quick, Kaiba! There's only one way to save us! You must... wash your hair!" Yami brandished a bottle of water and some shampoo.
"...What??"
"Now that you know the secret of summoning, you know that without the strangely colored and spiky hair, you can't summon! So you know that the dragons that you summoned would disappear!" Having finished the longest speech of his life that didn't involve Heart of the Cards, friendship, or a long, complex, well thought-out plan, Yami poured the water over Seto's head.
"Do you always ramble like that in the midst of danger?" Aragorn asked, though it was obvious the answer was yes.
The gel and dye just happened to be water soluble, and Seto's (brown) hair fell back down his face.
The Blue Eyes White Dragons returned instantly to their cards without the magic of weird hair to keep them out. The Nazgul dropped.
~*~
Gimli and Legolas finally managed to work themselves out of their tree. Legolas rubbed his pointy ears as the two walked along.
"That hurt," they muttered in unison, then stared wide-eyed at each other.
~*~
Gimli finished his banana, and threw the peel to the forest floor. "I bet that even you, Mr. Graceful Elf, couldn't walk over that without slipping."
Sniffing rather disdainfully, Legolas stepped on it... and didn't slip. In fact, he walked right past and crashed into the tree, landing atop all the other victims.
Gimli stared blankly for a moment. What just happened? He wondered, staring at the fallen elf. His eyes moved to the tree, and he felt the strangest urge to walk over to it. He shook his head to try to banish the odd feeling, but found that to be impossible. After a moment of trying, he submitted to the urge, and began walking. The stout dwarf walked on, completely forgetting about the banana peel. Gimli, of course, stepped directly on it and-
*Whack*
Smacked into the tree, head first. He collapsed on top of Legolas and the flat beings, assuring that they remained unconscious.
"Ow!" thought the tree. "He could've at least taken off his helmet before he cracked into me. Oh well, at least I am obviously ahead in our game..."
The tree bent over slightly to ease the mild pain from Gimli's hard head- er, uh, helmet. It continued sending its evil and strangely magnetic "pull" through the woods with an unwavering hope for new victims.
~*~
"SkrrrrEEEE!" Nazgul #1 cried.
Translation: "Mooooooommmmmmmmmeeee!"
"SKRREE!" Nazgul #3 echoed, though in a different tone.
Translation: "Whee!"
*SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!*
The Nazgul hit the ground, or more specifically, they hit the tree, then hit the ground.
~*~
Because the authoresses have no life, a random otaku stepped into the forest. "Hey look! Anime!" He cried, upon seeing the pile of people, and walked over. Gimli groaned and stuck out a limb, over which the otaku tripped, ever so gracefully.
SMACK! The tree smiled.
~*~
A chainsaw sounded in the forest somewhere as a deranged yami ran about, laughing gleefully. ZzzzzzzzzZZZZZ-
THUMP!
Yami Bakura gamboled by, leaving madness in his wake... or at least, rocks with their tops sawed off. Has your mother ever told you not to run with sharp objects? Well, let's find out why...
As the mad, chainsaw-bearing fiend skittered about, BAM! His chainsaw blew up. Looking at it, his eyes began to water. "Noooo... my poor chainsaw!" He chucked it to the floor and stomped off in a huff, only to splat into the tree.
~*~
Meanwhile, in response to this chapter, rocks worldwide began sporting "Rocks have feelings, too!" badges.
~*~
How many more will fall victim to the tree? What happened to Sam and Frodo? How does that growing pile continue to defy gravity? Will the authoresses ever go back to the book? And why the heck was Yami Bakura sawing rocks? These questions and more will be ignored in the next chapter!
*Crack!*
Bakura walked directly into the tree and fell on top of Gollum with a bone- jarring thud. All three were motionless. Joey had actually been about to wake, but Bakura's falling on top of Gollum on top of him had knocked him back out. They lay underneath the tree, Gollum snoring gently.
The tree watched them for a moment, then gleefully thought, "Yay! Another one! That brings my tally to four! Oh, Elbereth and Vallor, what a busy day! Wait until Treebeard hears..." then it went about its business of silently attracting people to it (so they would whack into it) like moths to a flame.
~*~
A random moth flew over to the authoresses and yelled, "Hey, I resent that!" It then flew away. The authoresses stared at its retreating form.
~*~
Sam and Frodo, enjoying a rare moment of silence in this hectic story, watched in mild amusement as the Nazgul tried to mount flat, blue dragons. It didn't work, obviously. The Nazgul's old dragons, depressed and feeling unloved, flew away.
~*~
Aragorn yelled when a Nazgul-ian dragon appeared through the canopy.
"What is that?" Seto asked.
But when the dragon didn't attack, Aragorn seemed to have gotten an idea.
~*~
The lead Nazgul clutched tightly to the Blue Eyes White Dragon's head, the other mounted Nazgul doing likewise. They lifted slowly into the air. Certainly, these dragons were difficult to ride, but the pretty colors were worth it!
Suddenly, two more dragons appeared. One was flat and yellow, Yami standing proudly on its over-large head. The other was...
"ScreeeEEch!" One Nazgul screeched.
"Eech? ScrEE?" Another asked.
Translation: "Traitor!" "Isn't that my dragon?"
The previously-Nazgul-ian dragon bore Aragorn on its back.
Just then, a shout pierced through the air. Seto clung desperately to the Curse of Dragon (the flat one)'s tail.
"Get your own dragon, Kaiba!" Yami roared.
"I... can't! No... more... dragon... cards... in my... deck!" came the reply.
For a moment, Yami toyed with the idea of letting his archrival fall to his demise. Then, he realized that his light would probably be eternally angry, and thus might cut off Yami's sugar supply.
With a sigh, Yami heaved Seto up (none too gently), then returned to his place at the dragon's head.
"SCRRR.....!" A Nazgul cried, sounding remarkably like a can-opener.
Translation: "Attack!"
Aragorn, Yami, and Seto's eyes all widened as their own dragons screeched towards them. Curse of Dragon easily took out Winged Dragon, Guardian of the Fortress #1, but the Blue Eyes (that's plural...?) were too strong.
"Quick, Kaiba! There's only one way to save us! You must... wash your hair!" Yami brandished a bottle of water and some shampoo.
"...What??"
"Now that you know the secret of summoning, you know that without the strangely colored and spiky hair, you can't summon! So you know that the dragons that you summoned would disappear!" Having finished the longest speech of his life that didn't involve Heart of the Cards, friendship, or a long, complex, well thought-out plan, Yami poured the water over Seto's head.
"Do you always ramble like that in the midst of danger?" Aragorn asked, though it was obvious the answer was yes.
The gel and dye just happened to be water soluble, and Seto's (brown) hair fell back down his face.
The Blue Eyes White Dragons returned instantly to their cards without the magic of weird hair to keep them out. The Nazgul dropped.
~*~
Gimli and Legolas finally managed to work themselves out of their tree. Legolas rubbed his pointy ears as the two walked along.
"That hurt," they muttered in unison, then stared wide-eyed at each other.
~*~
Gimli finished his banana, and threw the peel to the forest floor. "I bet that even you, Mr. Graceful Elf, couldn't walk over that without slipping."
Sniffing rather disdainfully, Legolas stepped on it... and didn't slip. In fact, he walked right past and crashed into the tree, landing atop all the other victims.
Gimli stared blankly for a moment. What just happened? He wondered, staring at the fallen elf. His eyes moved to the tree, and he felt the strangest urge to walk over to it. He shook his head to try to banish the odd feeling, but found that to be impossible. After a moment of trying, he submitted to the urge, and began walking. The stout dwarf walked on, completely forgetting about the banana peel. Gimli, of course, stepped directly on it and-
*Whack*
Smacked into the tree, head first. He collapsed on top of Legolas and the flat beings, assuring that they remained unconscious.
"Ow!" thought the tree. "He could've at least taken off his helmet before he cracked into me. Oh well, at least I am obviously ahead in our game..."
The tree bent over slightly to ease the mild pain from Gimli's hard head- er, uh, helmet. It continued sending its evil and strangely magnetic "pull" through the woods with an unwavering hope for new victims.
~*~
"SkrrrrEEEE!" Nazgul #1 cried.
Translation: "Mooooooommmmmmmmmeeee!"
"SKRREE!" Nazgul #3 echoed, though in a different tone.
Translation: "Whee!"
*SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!SMACK!*
The Nazgul hit the ground, or more specifically, they hit the tree, then hit the ground.
~*~
Because the authoresses have no life, a random otaku stepped into the forest. "Hey look! Anime!" He cried, upon seeing the pile of people, and walked over. Gimli groaned and stuck out a limb, over which the otaku tripped, ever so gracefully.
SMACK! The tree smiled.
~*~
A chainsaw sounded in the forest somewhere as a deranged yami ran about, laughing gleefully. ZzzzzzzzzZZZZZ-
THUMP!
Yami Bakura gamboled by, leaving madness in his wake... or at least, rocks with their tops sawed off. Has your mother ever told you not to run with sharp objects? Well, let's find out why...
As the mad, chainsaw-bearing fiend skittered about, BAM! His chainsaw blew up. Looking at it, his eyes began to water. "Noooo... my poor chainsaw!" He chucked it to the floor and stomped off in a huff, only to splat into the tree.
~*~
Meanwhile, in response to this chapter, rocks worldwide began sporting "Rocks have feelings, too!" badges.
~*~
How many more will fall victim to the tree? What happened to Sam and Frodo? How does that growing pile continue to defy gravity? Will the authoresses ever go back to the book? And why the heck was Yami Bakura sawing rocks? These questions and more will be ignored in the next chapter!