Chapter 10: Ooh Eeh Ooh Aah Aah…

As Frodo and Sam considered their options, they decided that they missed the company of the other hobbits. So, they turned back and retraced their steps.

"Sam?" Frodo asked after awhile.

"Yes, Mr. Frodo, sir?"

"Was that hut there when we came by this way earlier?"

"Umm…"

The two stared at the hut, bright pink with purple flowers.

"The pink… too bright… hurts my eyes…"

"Can't… look away… must… touch it…"

The two walked zombie-like towards the hut. Suddenly, a window burst open, and they were snapped out of their daze. A short figure hopped out, eerily resembling the Gaffer.

"Who are you?"

"My name…"

"Wow, you have a name? Do tell!" (In some cases, all hobbits were alike.)

"My name is unimportant. Let us go inside, and we will have a chat, shall we?"

"…Don't talk to strangers, right Sam?"

"Right, Mr. Frodo, sir, let's move on."

"No!" The Gaffer-look-alike snapped, "You're not allowed to do that!"

"Yes we are. You're not part of the script." The two sniffed disdainfully.

"How do you know?"

"I've read it!"

"And I've changed it," the figure said haughtily, and pushed the two in.

~*~

"Duel? With cards? Where do I get these cards?" The tree squinted down at them.

"You can… borrow Kaiba's deck!"

"What?" Seto clutched his deck protectively. "Paws… erm, branches off! This is MY deck!"

Yami and Seto glared for a moment, but when the third eye began glowing on Yami's forehead, Seto relented and looked away. "No fair! You have three eyes and two eyelids!" Even so, Seto forked over his deck… minus his Blue Eyes White Dragons. They had… sentimental value. Yes. That's it. Mr. Cold-and-Unfeeling was… sentimentally attached to his Blue Eyes, which is why he couldn't hand them over. Of course.

~*~

Within the hut of a pink that rivaled Seto's hair dye, the figure motioned Frodo and Sam to chairs. He then stood before Frodo.

"No fair! Why is everyone taller than me?" Frodo whined. "Even midget here is taller."

"…Mr. Frodo, sir? You're sitting down."

"Oh."

~*~

"Haha!" Yami called. "You lose!"

"Oh. Darn." The Ent got up to leave."

"Wait!"

"Yes, wait! My cards!" Seto yelled.

"And our friends?"

The Ent looked at the pile. "What about them?"

"Bring them back to life! You lost!"

"They're only unconscious," Smasher said, and left.

"Only… unconscious?" Kaiba asked. "You let him paw through my cards, and those clumsy fools were only unconscious?"

The future looked bleak for Yami no Yugi.

~*~

"I… am a witch doctor," the figure proclaimed. "And I shall grant you what you most want."

Frodo just stared.

"So? What do you most want?"

"Another hamburger would be nice," Sam said.

"Okay." The witch doctor began humming and singing in a chipmunk voice… and then…

Sam and Frodo stood once more on the path to Mordor, the former clutching a hamburger, the latter glaring. "Sam! You used our one wish on a hamburger? We could've destroyed the Ring! You could've at least asked for a cheeseburger!"

"Pardon my saying this, but you're just jealous that you didn't get the hamburger."

"Am not!"

Sam offered Frodo half.

"Well… alright. You are forgiven."

Sam grinned and began to eat his half.

~*~

"Wake up! Wake up!" Aragorn, Yami no Yugi, and Seto yelled, each in varying tones of anger, annoyance, and resentment. "Wake up, you stupid, clumsy fools!"

Aragorn leaned over and began screaming elvish curses at his fallen comrades (and foes). As he did so, Gimli rolled over with one arm extended into the air.

*smack!*

The sleeping dwarf smacked Aragorn in the face rather hard, dazing the ranger. Legolas snorted in his sleep (he dreamt he had just been crowned ruler of all lembas,and was particularly enjoying forcing the bullies from his childhood to beg). Aragorn glared at him (though he was still rather dazed, so his withering glare hit some trees, which instantly turned black and shriveled).

Seto, meanwhile, glared at Yami. "Hmmf!" he grunted indignantly. He reached for his deck, and froze. "NOOOO!" he screamed, rattling the leaves over head. One fell on his nose, but quickly slipped off for fear of incurring further wrath.

Kaiba stepped on it anyway.

~*~

"Did you hear something?" Frodo asked Sam, looking around cautiously.

"Like what, Mr. Frodo, sir?" Sam asked in return, following Frodo's eyes with his own.

"Never mind."

~*~

"NOOOO! NOOO! NOOOO!" Seto screamed hysterically.

"What?! What?!" Yami cried, but to no avail. Seto's screams were so loud that he couldn't be heard at all, yet those who had whacked into the tree remained unconscious.

"The-The TREE still HAS my CARDS!" Seto screamed, but because he had forgotten to breathe during his anguished cries, he then fell unconscious.

"Oops…" Yami muttered.

~*~

The authors would like to give you an idea on the facial expressions of the heroes of our story as they go through this… odd… ordea:

Yami: O.O followed by :-/

Seto: -O- followed by x-|

Aragorn: _ followed by .

Anyone unconscious: -.- followed by -.-

Thank you. We sincerely hope that helped.

~*~

"Oops…" Yami muttered.

"You already said that."