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Lucas and Lucas Arts do. They also own all the Characters and Worlds
contained therein. The characters created by me for this story are all
that I own.
Dantooine - Padawan
On the Matale estate we stumbled across the body of Casus Sandral. A journal on the body indicated he had been investigating strange ruins across Dantooine. From the wounds on the body I surmised that he had been killed by kath hounds. Further on we spotted another group of Mandalorian raiders. It was a vicious fight as we were outnumbered two to one, but we managed to prevail and I was sure that we had taken out the Mandaliorian raider's leader. He had two Jedi lightsabers on him as trophies and I showed them to Bastila. One of them had a red crystal and I stared at it puzzled, Bastila looked at it and said it was a dark Jedi lightsaber.
We proceeded on to the Sandral estate where I told Nurik Sandral of the manner of his son's death. He made an odd statement about how it changed nothing, and then asked for Casus's journal. He offered money for it but I refused and gave him the journal. He thanked me and then left. A few seconds after he left his daughter entered and asked if we were looking for Shen. She said her name was Rahasha and her father was mad with grief and had kidnapped Shen, she asked us to find him before her father hurt Shen in his madness. Caught by her emotional state I asked why she was so interested in freeing Shen. She told us that she had met Shen away from the estate and they continued meeting when they could and had fallen in love. I smiled at her and told her I would find Shen and free him immediately so her father would not have the chance to do anything to the young man.
Bastila didn't like it but given that his daughter was afraid that he would hurt Shen if we took the time to consult the Council she agreed that perhaps we should act on the information immediately. We had to deal with a few droids but it wasn't long before we found where Shen Matale was being kept. However, Shen refused to leave out of fear what Nurik would do to Rahasia when he was discovered missing. He compared her to an angel and said that he would rather die than leave her to suffer her father's wrath. I had to smile at this, and told the young man that I would find out if Rahasia would be willing to elope with him. Somehow I didn't doubt that she would. We found Rahasia and I told her that Shen would not leave without her. She laughed and said that she would wait for us outside. She was waiting for us outside the gates and they both thanked us. I mentioned that we might want to get moving before it was discovered that Shen was gone but it was too late.
Nurik Sandral and Ahlan Matale appeared each with escorting droids at that moment. I calmed myself and reached out with my force senses trying to see what the best way to handle this was. They were both very stubborn old men that thought they knew what was best for their children. They started out insulting each other; I asked them to calm down, but they continued. I said "You should try to work this out together" I said it in an even reasonable tone which was a marked contrast to how the two men sounded. It worked; they stopped shouting and tried to sound like they were being reasonable as well. I looked at Ahlan and said to him "Shen is capable of making decisions on his own" my tone and body language continued with the unspoken 'which is how you would want you son to be'. Ahlan said to me "But he is my son... I don't want to lose him..." I nodded in understanding.
Nurik said "I won't let my daughter go with him!" I turned to him and nodded and said "Children grow up and leave eventually." I left unsaid 'that is how things are supposed to be'. But I knew that he heard the unspoken words. Shen and Rahasia clung together and I could see the two men staring at them. Shen was being protective, sheltering Rahasia in his arms and looking like he would face down anything for her and she looked up at him adoringly. I could see both of the parents finally looking at them and realizing what they were seeing. Nurik said "Well, it wouldn't be so bad would it? Shen seems to genuinely care for my Rahasia. He might be a good husband for her someday. Ahlan humphed but said "As much as I may dislike it... I think I see it too."
I smiled at both of them and said "So you will let them stay together?" careful to phrase it such that it would be their decision. It was going well till they started arguing over where the couple would live. I said "Why don't you compromise?" Rahasia being a bright woman said when they started arguing again "Then you propose to buy us a new house, do you?" I had to smother a grin. It stopped both the old men and they thought about it and agreed that it sounded like a good idea. Ahlan and Nurik wandered off discussing where the house should be built and I hoped they wouldn't start arguing again but they sounded like they were agreeing. I relaxed some and smiled at the two young lovers, Rahasia then stunned me by saying "We will praise you to the Council for what you have done and name our children after you." I blinked and assured her that it wasn't necessary and that we needed to report back to the Council.
I suggested we go ahead and explore the ruins before we reported back now that the situation between the two families was settled. Bastila and Canderous agreed that it would probably be a good idea and we cautiously entered the ruins. Within was an ancient droid it spoke several unknown dialects at us before speaking in a dialect I knew, ancient Selkath. It said this place was a monument to the power of the Star Forge. That the droid served a race known as the Builders and it had been here over 25,000 years. It did not know what the Star Forge was but I guessed it might be some type of factory which would explain where the Sith were getting their supply of ships. The body of Jedi Nemo was in the corner and we asked if the droid had killed him, the droid replied that it hadn't. Nemo had failed the tests to prove himself worthy of the knowledge of the Star Forge. I asked how to pass the tests and the droid replied that we must enter the proving grounds to the east and west and prove ourselves or be destroyed.
We activated our energy shields and went to the west, there was an ancient battle droid there and we fought it and won. Past it was a computer console; I used my data pad to communicate with it and was able to answer the questions on what were the three forms of life giving planets. The east was much the same with one ancient battle droid; the question this time was what the three death giving planets were. With that the seal was broken and we were able to enter the room behind the initial droid. I had a strong sense of deja vu as we walked into the room of my dream and saw the device on the floor. It opened and a sphere rose from it and projected a navigational chart. We examined it closely and recognized several planets, but the map was incomplete and did not indicate where the Star Forge might be. Bastila and I agreed that the other pieces to the puzzle were likely on the planets indicated in this map. We needed to report back to the council and find out what they wanted us to do next. Though we both knew what it was likely to be.
It was a relief to get out of the oppressive ruin and back out into the sunlight. Malak in my dream had been correct the place was strong with the dark side of the force. And it was like a foul taste in my mouth, I was more than happy to be away from it.
As we walked back I paused to let the grieving father know that I thought I had found the leader of the raiders that had been plaguing them and had taken care of their threat. He thanked me and pressed some credits on me though I really didn't want them.
Bastila paused before we went in and said she wanted to speak with me, I nodded and we walked over to the retainer wall. Bastila said "I've been thinking about what the Jedi Council said about the two of us." I hitched myself up on the wall and leaned back letting the sun warm my face and listened to her. "There is a bond between us, I do not dispute that. I can feel it, as I'm sure you can. The nature of that bond and it's effect on our mission remain in question." I opened my eyes halfway and glanced at her and feeling mischievous said "I think you're interested in more than just the bond between us." She glared at me and said "Please! I'm a Jedi. Such feelings such attractions, are... well, they're beneath me, quite frankly."
I just grinned and raised an eyebrow at her, and said "Really?" She flushed and said "I admit, I find you intriguing. Uh... I mean, I find your command of the Force intriguing. But my interest in you is purely academic." I looked at her and said "your interest in me is not purely academic Bastila and we both know it." With that I walked away from her and entered the enclave leaving her no choice but to follow me into the Council Chamber.
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The Jedi Council was disturbed by what we had found and wanted to search the archives before coming to a decision. They summoned us when they were done and as I had expected told Bastila and I to go to the other four planets to find the information leading to the Star Forge. Juhani had requested to be included in the mission, and I was both pleased and worried. Pleased because she was a very good fighter, worried because I knew she had a crush on me. I asked about Carth, Canderous, Mission and Zaalbar. They would accompany me as well. I was a bit worried about the lack of a senior Jedi, but I could see the Master's reasoning for not wanting to draw attention to our mission.
Before we went back to the ship I decided to check on Elsie and see how she was doing. I honestly didn't think a lot of the man she was attracted to but I didn't say so of course. Bastila did surprise me when she said to the woman that love can do strange things. I was happy to see that Elsie had gotten over me destroying her droid and was interacting with people again.
On the way back to the ship Jedi Deesra stopped me to give me a warning about a creature he had come across in his records. It fed on the blood of those strong in the Force and was believed to have been bred by the ancient Sith to kill Jedi. It was naturally resistant to the Force and was strong and cunning. It was called a terentatek, and he thought that Malak's successes may have drawn them out of hibernation. The last time they had been seen was after the Exar Kun war. There had been a Great Hunt to try and exterminate them. The Hunt was called off rather than send Jedi to Korriban, and only three Jedi were allowed to continue. They all had strong bonds to one another and to the Force and it was thought that together they would be able to resist the dark side. Their names were Duron Qel-Droma, Gunn Han Saresh and Shaela Nur their master had felt them become one with the Force sometime after they had left for Korriban and it was thought that one of the monsters had killed them. He warned me that we might encounter one of these on our journey and for us not to underestimate their cunning.
On the way into the Ebon Hawk I waved to the Twi'lek Lur Akra Sulas and assured him that I would keep an eye out for Sasha in my travels. He had stopped me earlier in the week on one of my trips to the ship to inquire if I had seen a young human girl named Sasha. He was in the employ of Rundil ot Sulem whose daughter had been kidnapped by Mandalorian raiders a few years ago and had not yet been found and her father still hoped that she was alive and that he would find her.
I entered the ship and smiled at Juhani who was already aboard and asked her if she had settled in. She nodded to me and assured me that she had found an unused bunk on the women's side of the ship and had already stowed her gear. Hesitantly she said "I feel I must apologize for the way I acted towards you before, in the grove. It was wrong of me." I nodded and said "You thought the dark side had consumed you. It is nothing." Juhani said "I am sorry for attacking you. I am sorry for thinking you would only try to kill me. I hope that by helping you in your task I may redeem myself in your eyes... and in my own." I shook my head and said "Do not worry, Juhani. I forgive you." She replied "Thank you... It is most reassuring to know that you can forgive me, even though I tried to take your life." I chuckled and said "Don't put me on some pedestal Juhani, and don't forget to remind me to tell you my story." With that I left her and went to find Mission. Droids were moving about the ship getting it ready for the journey and I side stepped them as they moved busily about.
I finally found Mission in the women's bunk area working on some security tunneling spikes. I sat down on my bulk and watched her; finally she stopped and turned toward me with a raised eyebrow. I said "Is it an alright time to talk about your brother?" When we had spoken earlier on Taris she had gotten very upset about her brother leaving her and seemed to blame it on a woman named Lena, I was curious to find out more but the time to ask had never presented itself. Mission blushed and apologized for her anger the last time she had mentioned it and said "When it comes to Lena I tend to get a little worked up." I asked why she hated the woman so much and Mission told me of how her brother Griff had meet Lena at a cantina where she was a dancer. They had begun dating and a few months later Griff had told Mission that he and Lena were going off world to try and make their fortune. Griff had promised that he would come back and get Mission when he had made some money but he had never returned. Mission blamed it all on Lena, I wasn't so sure but I didn't think that Mission would listen to me right now. She was positively seething at the mention of Lena. Misson said that part of the reason she had come with us was the hope that she would find Griff but for me not to worry that she would let her search interfere with our mission. I nodded to her and left her to her work hoping she would calm down.
Since we wouldn't be leaving until the morning I decided to go find Canderous and see if I could pry some more of his past out of him. I found him working on his repeating blaster and leaned up against the swoop bike in the bay to watch. I casually asked if he would tell me any more of his war stories and he nodded and paused in his work. Canderous started "I was one of the best youth warriors in clan Ordo in my time. No one before me had mastered the power of our Basilisk war droids as quickly as I had, except Mandalore himself of course." He told of how young Mandalores would prove themselves in real combat and bring back the story of their achievements. I asked him what his story had been. He looked at me and "I remember it well, orbiting high above a placid world, its defenses just stirring. As was tradition, I would go ahead of the first wave to find enemies in the thickest fighting. I remember sitting there in my armor, linked directly with the Basilisk thrumming beneath me. My heart racing with fear at the coming battle." I grinned and said "I didn't think Mandalorians got afraid." He looked at me and replied "Every new warrior has to fear to understand how to beat it. You must know that." He paused and looked at me and I remembered my first combat mission, I to had felt fear and my heart had raced, he was right you had to know fear and get through it when you were a warrior. I nodded to him soberly and he continued telling of how he had been dropped from high altitude riding a battle droid of some type, I was reminded of the devastation the Mandalores had wrought when he described leveling an entire complex. What an odd people they were, bloodthirsty, violence loving, honorable and courageous. It was a shame that they felt the need to test themselves in the way they had chosen. They could have been so much more than the ravening plague that they had been. Canderous finished his tale saying "I'll never forget those times. But... things are different now. We can't go on fighting the way we had. There are too few of us left now." With that he returned to the work on his blaster obviously wanting to end the conversation.
I finally decided to find Carth and see if I could resolve the issues still between us. I found him on the bridge checking out the navigational computer. I waited till he was done and asked if we could continue our discussion. Carth refused and I asked if he wouldn't feel better if he did. Carth snapped "Listen sister... just because we're working together does not mean you get to badger me with constant questions!" I said "Do we have another problem, now?" He replied angrily "Blast it if you aren't the most frustrating woman to talk to! Isn't there someone else you can harass for a little while?" I grinned at him and said "No you're the last one left, I've harassed everyone else already." Carth stared at me then sighed and said "Okay, I give up. You win." He went on to tell me of his commanding officer Saul Karath who had taught him everything about being a soldier. Saul had approached him about how the Republic was on the loosing side and how he had gotten angry with him and Saul had left. Saul turned to the Sith and betrayed his unit by giving the Sith the codes to bypass their scanners. And Carth blamed himself for not seeing that Saul was trying to recruit him and killing him then. He had fought Saul for years and vowed to make him regret his betrayal. I had to agree, there is nothing worse than betraying your own men to the enemy. I nodded my understanding to Carth and left him to his thoughts.
I decided to go to the equipment shop and see if there was anything that we needed before we left Dantoonie and stopped to ask Mission if she wanted to accompany me. We were passing through the inner courtyard when a Twi'lek woman paused and said "Mission? Is that you? It's me, Lena. Remember? I was dating your brother back on Taris."
I was astonished that we would run into the very person Misson had been talking about and a bit concerned as to how Mission would react. I extended my force senses so I could detect if the woman was lying. Mission asked where Griff was and Lena replied that they had broken up a few months after they left Taris; she said Griff could be charming but he was bad news. Mission threatened to smack the woman if she didn't take the comment back and Lena stepped back astonished and asked "What? Mission, what's wrong with you? Why are you acting this way?" She was sincere and I told Lena that Griff was a sensitive subject. Lena replied to me that Griff could be frustrating and she guessed that's why Mission hadn't wanted to come with them when they left Taris. She wasn't lying; I could detect no falsehood in her statement.
Mission said "You liar! Griff told me you didn't want his little sister tagging along - that's why he had to leave me behind!" Lena cursed and said "I wanted you to come with us Mission. I even offered to pay for your ticket." She went on to say that Griff had told her that Mission didn't want to leave Taris and she had said that they shouldn't even go, but Griff had assured her that as soon as they struck it rich on Tatooine they would come back for Mission.
Mission replied "No you're the one who's lying! Griff wouldn't... he wouldn't try to leave me behind!" She looked at me for reassurance but I knew Lena wasn't lying; I simply shook my head sadly. Lena said "Think about it. If Griff wasn't trying to ditch you, Mission, then why didn't he tell you where we were going?" She went on to say that Griff had tried to blame Mission for holding him back, then when she ran out of money he started blaming her. Lena looked at me for support but I simply said "I'd like to hear Griff's side of things before I judge him." She told me that as far as she knew Griff was still on Tatooine. Mission yelled that Griff was probably better off without Lena. And I moved over to Mission and put my arm around her and looked at Lena. Lena caught my meaning and said "I guess that's my cue to leave then. I didn't mean to upset you Mission. But one day you'll see I'm right about your brother."
I decided the shop could wait and steered Mission over to some benches in the shade to talk with her. I knew that she was upset and needed to talk over things before they festered. Mission said to me "Don't tell me you believe Lena's lies? Griff might be working as a miner on Tatooine, but the rest of her story is bantha poo-doo!" She said that she would like to try and find her brother if we had time during our visit to Tatooine. I nodded not replying to whether or not Lena had been lying and told her that we would try to find her brother. I decided to drop the subject for now and let her have time to think over things. We went to the shop and bought a few supplies then returned to the Ebon Hawk.
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It was after dinner and I had sat down to practice on my mandovil when Juhani approached me asking if now was a good time to ask me to tell my story. I nodded to her and asked her if she had ever used adrenals. She shook her head and said that her race had no need of such things; they produced enough of their own. I asked her if she knew what they did for humans and she said that she supposed they acted like hers helping us to react quicker and with more strength. I nodded and asked if she had ever heard of hyper battle adrenals, Carth overheard at this point and came over saying that he didn't like those stims, too many people had used them and went into either insane rages or became incapacitated with fear.
Juhani was surprised and looked at me inquiringly and I nodded to her. "Yep my first experience with hyper battle adrenals, I went into a rage and yelled something at the instructor about how I would rip his heart out and feed it to him" I grinned and chuckled at this point. Juhari's eyes were wide and I noticed that everyone seemed to be listening now, including Bastila who had just boarded the ship. She was staring at me astonished having come into the conversation late. "I think I got as far as lunging toward him when the two safeties started beating on me with the stun batons and brought me down. I don't really remember that part well I just remember coming to face down on the matt with two very heavy guys on top of me. My instructor grabbed me by the hair and flashed a light in my eyes to see if I was concussed and laughed at me. He told me that he hadn't realized I cared for him so much then told me to get up and get back in line. He then started yelling at everyone else that they would have their turn as well and not to think the same thing wouldn't happen to them."
I paused and Juhani said "so you attacked your teacher in a rage as well, yet you obviously have learned to deal with your anger, how?" I grinned at her and said "Well a lot of work with my assigned therapist on how to handle anger, I kept trying to keep it under control, trying to suppress it. Every time I went on battle adrenals it spun out of my ability to suppress and I lost all semblance of control. She finally got me to realize that I wasn't doing well with my attempts and taught me that I didn't have to control my anger at all. I just had to control whether or not I choose to react to it. I had to totally relearn how to deal with my emotions but I have to admit two huge guys in full armor with stun batons is really, really good incentive to learn quickly. Its an odd feeling when you do learn it, rather like being in the center of a whirlwind, you emotions always try to get you to react to them and its hard not to because its instinctive to think that emotion and reaction are the same thing. But you can separate them, feeling the emotions but still being calm. We used to say in training 'We are sentient beings, with animal bodies, we have the choice to react as the sentient being or as the animal'. We are all evolved from ancestors that learned to think and the instincts that served us well when we were not intelligent are still hardwired into our bodies. I know most people don't even realize how much their natural adrenal reactions drive their emotions. But the brain feels the body's reaction to adrenals and attempts to assign emotions to them, usually fear or anger."
I paused and looked at Juhani. She nodded and said "Yes, the fight with Quatra was intense and I could feel my anger growing as she pressed me. I attempted to control my emotions but at some point I slipped and my anger overwhelmed me and I attacked her." I nodded and said "I thought as much, your body knew you were in danger during the fight and kept ramping up your hormones, you reacted both to the situation and the increased adrenals by feeling anger which eventually exceeded your ability to control. Consider what I said about trying to separate the emotion and your reaction to the emotion. They don't have to follow the other automatically, but it is not an easy thing to relearn."
Canderous said "Wise words, a warrior deals with fear just so, recognizing the bodies' reactions and the feelings that rise, refusing to react by cowering in fear but proceeding with on with what needs to be done."
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I was stowing the rest of my gear in my bunk later when Bastila came in and sat down on her bunk, looking at me curiously. I turned to here and said "You have something you want to ask me?" She looked surprised and said "I do. How did you know?" I was feeling mischievous so I replied "well... your face is all scrunched up like a kinrath pup." She immediately became the Jedi princess and said "A... a kinrath pup?! It most certainly is not!" I sat back to watch the show paying little attention to what she said until she said "My thoughts remain hidden, including whatever my feelings are for you. Uh... I mean whatever I feel about you... uh... I mean whatever I think about you." By now she was blushing intensely and I could only think of how beautiful she was and how desirable. I said smiling "You're so cute when you're embarrassed." If anything she flushed deeper and said "I... that is, you... Why must you be so impossibly infuriating?! You know very well what I'm talking about. I'm referring to the bond between us; the one the Jedi Council spoke of. Our connection allows us glimpses into each other's mind. We can feel some of what the other feels. And what I feel within you troubles me."
I listened with half an ear I knew the rote speech already about the dark side and was starting to feel a bit abused by all of it. I mean it was like they were saying we know you are going to fall to the dark side, it's predestined. If they went on and on like this with all their Padawans its no wonder they just went over to the dark side, at least they were away from the speeches. Our instructors in training had ragged on us but they had never implied that we would not succeed, just that we weren't trying hard enough to succeed and to stop being lazy. Bastila was winding down some and saying"... relatively little training could have terrible consequences. For you, and for everyone around you." I couldn't help myself I just couldn't take it seriously right now "You could warn me when I do something bad. Blink once for dark side, twice for light" I said grinning.
Bastila said angrily "This is not a joke! The choices you make could affect both our destinies, not to mention the fate of the Republic and the entire galaxy! There is much at stake. Thankfully you have exhibited a degree of compassion and self-control up to this point. I sincerely hope you can maintain these traits in the future. We must all resist the influence of the dark side! It is everything we are fighting against! This is doubly important for you, with your natural affinity for the Force!"
She was angrier than I had usually seen her and the amusement value of her preaching at me while being so angry at me was not lost on me but I didn't think it was healthy for her so I asked mildly "Why are you getting so upset?" That deflated her and I could see her getting her anger back under control, she shoved stuff down, it was no wonder it got away from her all the time. She said "I'm sorry if I come across as harsh. But I am concerned. For you, for our mission. And for myself, as well. Our destinies are intertwined. Everything that one of us does will have consequences for the other. Any reckless behavior on your part is likely to affect me as well."
I suddenly realized she really was concerned that I might affect her for the worse with my emotions. I got up and moved around to face her and knelt on one knee on the deck in front of her putting myself on eye level with her. I thought about how utterly certain I was of this one fact and sent that through the bond and said "I won't do anything to hurt you." She looked at me searchingly and said "I believe you truly mean what you say. For now. But sometimes it is not easy to keep such promises. Your power could be a gift or a curse. When you need guidance, or advice, or support I will do my best to help you stay on the path of the light." I sighed to myself and said "I would appreciate any help you could offer" and vowed to myself to be more pleasant the next time she felt the need to lecture me. I really didn't want her to be upset and worrying about me. She said "I only hope I have the wisdom to help you through the dark times." I nodded to her and got back up and continued stowing my gear.
I kept my thoughts close so she wouldn't realize how worried about her I was, I knew the masters had their reason for not sending along a senior Jedi but for her sake I wish they had. She had so little self confidence that it angered me. She was proud of her Battle Meditation but underlying it was a sense that she was only of worth to the Jedi because of it. I was angry for a moment at the Council but then remembered how many times Master Vandar and Khar had said that we should support one another. Maybe that was my task, to get her to trust in her own strength.
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The next morning we left for Tatooine, during the hyperspace trip I had a chance to talk to Carth again, he had been very quiet and had been avoiding me since our last discussion/confrontation. I finally cornered him and asked what the matter was. He said that he felt that he was being left out of the loop and why had they sent Bastila and I off without a Master Jedi at the very least. I nodded and said that Bastila and I were a special case because we had a force bond. He gave me an odd look but continued questioning me as to why we were being sent off after the Star Maps. I shrugged at him unable to give him a better reason and he said "I'll tell you this much... I am not going to wait around until I'm betrayed again!" I looked at him steadily and said "I am not going to betray you. I am not Saul" He said something about seeing about that and then realized what he had just said from my outraged stare. Carth said "Look, I didn't mean it that way." I raised my eyebrow at him unconvinced. "I want to get to Saul, not.... no... no, forget it. It seems all I can do is insult you, isn't it? Just forget I said anything." he finished and turned away and left for the men's quarters.
I shook my head and went to see how Mission was doing. She was in our quarters talking to Juhani, I came in and overheard her asking "How did you come to be a Jedi?" I was curious to hear this myself so I seated myself on my bunk and listened. Juhani nodded to me and answered Mission "Well... It goes back a number of years... Back on my home world we did not see Jedi very often, especially where I lived."
Mission asked "Where did you live?" Juhani answered "The hind end of space. A pit of a world, to be sure. Where Jedi rarely tread... But we had heard of them. Well, everyone had, so that is not to be unexpected. Champions of truth. Defenders of justice. Heroes of the Republic. It was very easy for a child to be enthralled by their image, their mystique. May be I was one of those children."
I broke in and asked curiously "Did you meet a Jedi?"
Juhani nodded to me and said "Yes... yes I did. When I saw a Jedi for the first time they lived up to everything my imagination had created them to be. I was awed... and maybe a bit enamored..." Mission said "So what did you do?" Juhani continued "From that moment on I knew that I would have to try to become a Jedi. To lift myself out of the rut I had been living in for years and to make a real difference, as the Jedi were. The foolish delusions of a child. But this child made it happen. As soon as I was able I left my world and went in search of them. I found them and was accepted. I had been living my dream on Dantooine for several years before you came. Although... perhaps I was not entirely ready for it... or not completely suited to the task. Otherwise I would not have fallen..." with the last she looked at me and said "But thanks to you I have been redeemed. Perhaps I may yet live to see that dream of mine come true."
I said to her "If you want to be a Jedi you have the strength within yourself to become one Juhani. Of that I have no doubt." She looked surprised and maybe gratified in my confidence in her and nodded to me. Juhani left after that going off somewhere else and left me alone with Mission.
I took the opportunity to ask Mission how she was doing. Mission admitted that perhaps Lena had been right when she said that Griff always blamed other people for his problems. I asked her if she believed Lena now and she said that she didn't, but maybe it was Griff's idea to leave her behind, maybe he had thought he would come back later and get her. Maybe he had skipped out on some debts and had to leave her behind so it would look like he was coming back. I didn't want to appear too harsh on her brother but I wondered if she realized what she was saying about him. I simply said that it sounded like how they had come to Taris. She started to agree then realized what she was saying and finally said that perhaps Lena was right. She realized she had been idolizing her brother and not seeing his faults, but she still wanted to go find him and speak to him herself and see what he had to say. I nodded to her and told her we would definitely inquire on Tatooine for her brother.
On the Matale estate we stumbled across the body of Casus Sandral. A journal on the body indicated he had been investigating strange ruins across Dantooine. From the wounds on the body I surmised that he had been killed by kath hounds. Further on we spotted another group of Mandalorian raiders. It was a vicious fight as we were outnumbered two to one, but we managed to prevail and I was sure that we had taken out the Mandaliorian raider's leader. He had two Jedi lightsabers on him as trophies and I showed them to Bastila. One of them had a red crystal and I stared at it puzzled, Bastila looked at it and said it was a dark Jedi lightsaber.
We proceeded on to the Sandral estate where I told Nurik Sandral of the manner of his son's death. He made an odd statement about how it changed nothing, and then asked for Casus's journal. He offered money for it but I refused and gave him the journal. He thanked me and then left. A few seconds after he left his daughter entered and asked if we were looking for Shen. She said her name was Rahasha and her father was mad with grief and had kidnapped Shen, she asked us to find him before her father hurt Shen in his madness. Caught by her emotional state I asked why she was so interested in freeing Shen. She told us that she had met Shen away from the estate and they continued meeting when they could and had fallen in love. I smiled at her and told her I would find Shen and free him immediately so her father would not have the chance to do anything to the young man.
Bastila didn't like it but given that his daughter was afraid that he would hurt Shen if we took the time to consult the Council she agreed that perhaps we should act on the information immediately. We had to deal with a few droids but it wasn't long before we found where Shen Matale was being kept. However, Shen refused to leave out of fear what Nurik would do to Rahasia when he was discovered missing. He compared her to an angel and said that he would rather die than leave her to suffer her father's wrath. I had to smile at this, and told the young man that I would find out if Rahasia would be willing to elope with him. Somehow I didn't doubt that she would. We found Rahasia and I told her that Shen would not leave without her. She laughed and said that she would wait for us outside. She was waiting for us outside the gates and they both thanked us. I mentioned that we might want to get moving before it was discovered that Shen was gone but it was too late.
Nurik Sandral and Ahlan Matale appeared each with escorting droids at that moment. I calmed myself and reached out with my force senses trying to see what the best way to handle this was. They were both very stubborn old men that thought they knew what was best for their children. They started out insulting each other; I asked them to calm down, but they continued. I said "You should try to work this out together" I said it in an even reasonable tone which was a marked contrast to how the two men sounded. It worked; they stopped shouting and tried to sound like they were being reasonable as well. I looked at Ahlan and said to him "Shen is capable of making decisions on his own" my tone and body language continued with the unspoken 'which is how you would want you son to be'. Ahlan said to me "But he is my son... I don't want to lose him..." I nodded in understanding.
Nurik said "I won't let my daughter go with him!" I turned to him and nodded and said "Children grow up and leave eventually." I left unsaid 'that is how things are supposed to be'. But I knew that he heard the unspoken words. Shen and Rahasia clung together and I could see the two men staring at them. Shen was being protective, sheltering Rahasia in his arms and looking like he would face down anything for her and she looked up at him adoringly. I could see both of the parents finally looking at them and realizing what they were seeing. Nurik said "Well, it wouldn't be so bad would it? Shen seems to genuinely care for my Rahasia. He might be a good husband for her someday. Ahlan humphed but said "As much as I may dislike it... I think I see it too."
I smiled at both of them and said "So you will let them stay together?" careful to phrase it such that it would be their decision. It was going well till they started arguing over where the couple would live. I said "Why don't you compromise?" Rahasia being a bright woman said when they started arguing again "Then you propose to buy us a new house, do you?" I had to smother a grin. It stopped both the old men and they thought about it and agreed that it sounded like a good idea. Ahlan and Nurik wandered off discussing where the house should be built and I hoped they wouldn't start arguing again but they sounded like they were agreeing. I relaxed some and smiled at the two young lovers, Rahasia then stunned me by saying "We will praise you to the Council for what you have done and name our children after you." I blinked and assured her that it wasn't necessary and that we needed to report back to the Council.
I suggested we go ahead and explore the ruins before we reported back now that the situation between the two families was settled. Bastila and Canderous agreed that it would probably be a good idea and we cautiously entered the ruins. Within was an ancient droid it spoke several unknown dialects at us before speaking in a dialect I knew, ancient Selkath. It said this place was a monument to the power of the Star Forge. That the droid served a race known as the Builders and it had been here over 25,000 years. It did not know what the Star Forge was but I guessed it might be some type of factory which would explain where the Sith were getting their supply of ships. The body of Jedi Nemo was in the corner and we asked if the droid had killed him, the droid replied that it hadn't. Nemo had failed the tests to prove himself worthy of the knowledge of the Star Forge. I asked how to pass the tests and the droid replied that we must enter the proving grounds to the east and west and prove ourselves or be destroyed.
We activated our energy shields and went to the west, there was an ancient battle droid there and we fought it and won. Past it was a computer console; I used my data pad to communicate with it and was able to answer the questions on what were the three forms of life giving planets. The east was much the same with one ancient battle droid; the question this time was what the three death giving planets were. With that the seal was broken and we were able to enter the room behind the initial droid. I had a strong sense of deja vu as we walked into the room of my dream and saw the device on the floor. It opened and a sphere rose from it and projected a navigational chart. We examined it closely and recognized several planets, but the map was incomplete and did not indicate where the Star Forge might be. Bastila and I agreed that the other pieces to the puzzle were likely on the planets indicated in this map. We needed to report back to the council and find out what they wanted us to do next. Though we both knew what it was likely to be.
It was a relief to get out of the oppressive ruin and back out into the sunlight. Malak in my dream had been correct the place was strong with the dark side of the force. And it was like a foul taste in my mouth, I was more than happy to be away from it.
As we walked back I paused to let the grieving father know that I thought I had found the leader of the raiders that had been plaguing them and had taken care of their threat. He thanked me and pressed some credits on me though I really didn't want them.
Bastila paused before we went in and said she wanted to speak with me, I nodded and we walked over to the retainer wall. Bastila said "I've been thinking about what the Jedi Council said about the two of us." I hitched myself up on the wall and leaned back letting the sun warm my face and listened to her. "There is a bond between us, I do not dispute that. I can feel it, as I'm sure you can. The nature of that bond and it's effect on our mission remain in question." I opened my eyes halfway and glanced at her and feeling mischievous said "I think you're interested in more than just the bond between us." She glared at me and said "Please! I'm a Jedi. Such feelings such attractions, are... well, they're beneath me, quite frankly."
I just grinned and raised an eyebrow at her, and said "Really?" She flushed and said "I admit, I find you intriguing. Uh... I mean, I find your command of the Force intriguing. But my interest in you is purely academic." I looked at her and said "your interest in me is not purely academic Bastila and we both know it." With that I walked away from her and entered the enclave leaving her no choice but to follow me into the Council Chamber.
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The Jedi Council was disturbed by what we had found and wanted to search the archives before coming to a decision. They summoned us when they were done and as I had expected told Bastila and I to go to the other four planets to find the information leading to the Star Forge. Juhani had requested to be included in the mission, and I was both pleased and worried. Pleased because she was a very good fighter, worried because I knew she had a crush on me. I asked about Carth, Canderous, Mission and Zaalbar. They would accompany me as well. I was a bit worried about the lack of a senior Jedi, but I could see the Master's reasoning for not wanting to draw attention to our mission.
Before we went back to the ship I decided to check on Elsie and see how she was doing. I honestly didn't think a lot of the man she was attracted to but I didn't say so of course. Bastila did surprise me when she said to the woman that love can do strange things. I was happy to see that Elsie had gotten over me destroying her droid and was interacting with people again.
On the way back to the ship Jedi Deesra stopped me to give me a warning about a creature he had come across in his records. It fed on the blood of those strong in the Force and was believed to have been bred by the ancient Sith to kill Jedi. It was naturally resistant to the Force and was strong and cunning. It was called a terentatek, and he thought that Malak's successes may have drawn them out of hibernation. The last time they had been seen was after the Exar Kun war. There had been a Great Hunt to try and exterminate them. The Hunt was called off rather than send Jedi to Korriban, and only three Jedi were allowed to continue. They all had strong bonds to one another and to the Force and it was thought that together they would be able to resist the dark side. Their names were Duron Qel-Droma, Gunn Han Saresh and Shaela Nur their master had felt them become one with the Force sometime after they had left for Korriban and it was thought that one of the monsters had killed them. He warned me that we might encounter one of these on our journey and for us not to underestimate their cunning.
On the way into the Ebon Hawk I waved to the Twi'lek Lur Akra Sulas and assured him that I would keep an eye out for Sasha in my travels. He had stopped me earlier in the week on one of my trips to the ship to inquire if I had seen a young human girl named Sasha. He was in the employ of Rundil ot Sulem whose daughter had been kidnapped by Mandalorian raiders a few years ago and had not yet been found and her father still hoped that she was alive and that he would find her.
I entered the ship and smiled at Juhani who was already aboard and asked her if she had settled in. She nodded to me and assured me that she had found an unused bunk on the women's side of the ship and had already stowed her gear. Hesitantly she said "I feel I must apologize for the way I acted towards you before, in the grove. It was wrong of me." I nodded and said "You thought the dark side had consumed you. It is nothing." Juhani said "I am sorry for attacking you. I am sorry for thinking you would only try to kill me. I hope that by helping you in your task I may redeem myself in your eyes... and in my own." I shook my head and said "Do not worry, Juhani. I forgive you." She replied "Thank you... It is most reassuring to know that you can forgive me, even though I tried to take your life." I chuckled and said "Don't put me on some pedestal Juhani, and don't forget to remind me to tell you my story." With that I left her and went to find Mission. Droids were moving about the ship getting it ready for the journey and I side stepped them as they moved busily about.
I finally found Mission in the women's bunk area working on some security tunneling spikes. I sat down on my bulk and watched her; finally she stopped and turned toward me with a raised eyebrow. I said "Is it an alright time to talk about your brother?" When we had spoken earlier on Taris she had gotten very upset about her brother leaving her and seemed to blame it on a woman named Lena, I was curious to find out more but the time to ask had never presented itself. Mission blushed and apologized for her anger the last time she had mentioned it and said "When it comes to Lena I tend to get a little worked up." I asked why she hated the woman so much and Mission told me of how her brother Griff had meet Lena at a cantina where she was a dancer. They had begun dating and a few months later Griff had told Mission that he and Lena were going off world to try and make their fortune. Griff had promised that he would come back and get Mission when he had made some money but he had never returned. Mission blamed it all on Lena, I wasn't so sure but I didn't think that Mission would listen to me right now. She was positively seething at the mention of Lena. Misson said that part of the reason she had come with us was the hope that she would find Griff but for me not to worry that she would let her search interfere with our mission. I nodded to her and left her to her work hoping she would calm down.
Since we wouldn't be leaving until the morning I decided to go find Canderous and see if I could pry some more of his past out of him. I found him working on his repeating blaster and leaned up against the swoop bike in the bay to watch. I casually asked if he would tell me any more of his war stories and he nodded and paused in his work. Canderous started "I was one of the best youth warriors in clan Ordo in my time. No one before me had mastered the power of our Basilisk war droids as quickly as I had, except Mandalore himself of course." He told of how young Mandalores would prove themselves in real combat and bring back the story of their achievements. I asked him what his story had been. He looked at me and "I remember it well, orbiting high above a placid world, its defenses just stirring. As was tradition, I would go ahead of the first wave to find enemies in the thickest fighting. I remember sitting there in my armor, linked directly with the Basilisk thrumming beneath me. My heart racing with fear at the coming battle." I grinned and said "I didn't think Mandalorians got afraid." He looked at me and replied "Every new warrior has to fear to understand how to beat it. You must know that." He paused and looked at me and I remembered my first combat mission, I to had felt fear and my heart had raced, he was right you had to know fear and get through it when you were a warrior. I nodded to him soberly and he continued telling of how he had been dropped from high altitude riding a battle droid of some type, I was reminded of the devastation the Mandalores had wrought when he described leveling an entire complex. What an odd people they were, bloodthirsty, violence loving, honorable and courageous. It was a shame that they felt the need to test themselves in the way they had chosen. They could have been so much more than the ravening plague that they had been. Canderous finished his tale saying "I'll never forget those times. But... things are different now. We can't go on fighting the way we had. There are too few of us left now." With that he returned to the work on his blaster obviously wanting to end the conversation.
I finally decided to find Carth and see if I could resolve the issues still between us. I found him on the bridge checking out the navigational computer. I waited till he was done and asked if we could continue our discussion. Carth refused and I asked if he wouldn't feel better if he did. Carth snapped "Listen sister... just because we're working together does not mean you get to badger me with constant questions!" I said "Do we have another problem, now?" He replied angrily "Blast it if you aren't the most frustrating woman to talk to! Isn't there someone else you can harass for a little while?" I grinned at him and said "No you're the last one left, I've harassed everyone else already." Carth stared at me then sighed and said "Okay, I give up. You win." He went on to tell me of his commanding officer Saul Karath who had taught him everything about being a soldier. Saul had approached him about how the Republic was on the loosing side and how he had gotten angry with him and Saul had left. Saul turned to the Sith and betrayed his unit by giving the Sith the codes to bypass their scanners. And Carth blamed himself for not seeing that Saul was trying to recruit him and killing him then. He had fought Saul for years and vowed to make him regret his betrayal. I had to agree, there is nothing worse than betraying your own men to the enemy. I nodded my understanding to Carth and left him to his thoughts.
I decided to go to the equipment shop and see if there was anything that we needed before we left Dantoonie and stopped to ask Mission if she wanted to accompany me. We were passing through the inner courtyard when a Twi'lek woman paused and said "Mission? Is that you? It's me, Lena. Remember? I was dating your brother back on Taris."
I was astonished that we would run into the very person Misson had been talking about and a bit concerned as to how Mission would react. I extended my force senses so I could detect if the woman was lying. Mission asked where Griff was and Lena replied that they had broken up a few months after they left Taris; she said Griff could be charming but he was bad news. Mission threatened to smack the woman if she didn't take the comment back and Lena stepped back astonished and asked "What? Mission, what's wrong with you? Why are you acting this way?" She was sincere and I told Lena that Griff was a sensitive subject. Lena replied to me that Griff could be frustrating and she guessed that's why Mission hadn't wanted to come with them when they left Taris. She wasn't lying; I could detect no falsehood in her statement.
Mission said "You liar! Griff told me you didn't want his little sister tagging along - that's why he had to leave me behind!" Lena cursed and said "I wanted you to come with us Mission. I even offered to pay for your ticket." She went on to say that Griff had told her that Mission didn't want to leave Taris and she had said that they shouldn't even go, but Griff had assured her that as soon as they struck it rich on Tatooine they would come back for Mission.
Mission replied "No you're the one who's lying! Griff wouldn't... he wouldn't try to leave me behind!" She looked at me for reassurance but I knew Lena wasn't lying; I simply shook my head sadly. Lena said "Think about it. If Griff wasn't trying to ditch you, Mission, then why didn't he tell you where we were going?" She went on to say that Griff had tried to blame Mission for holding him back, then when she ran out of money he started blaming her. Lena looked at me for support but I simply said "I'd like to hear Griff's side of things before I judge him." She told me that as far as she knew Griff was still on Tatooine. Mission yelled that Griff was probably better off without Lena. And I moved over to Mission and put my arm around her and looked at Lena. Lena caught my meaning and said "I guess that's my cue to leave then. I didn't mean to upset you Mission. But one day you'll see I'm right about your brother."
I decided the shop could wait and steered Mission over to some benches in the shade to talk with her. I knew that she was upset and needed to talk over things before they festered. Mission said to me "Don't tell me you believe Lena's lies? Griff might be working as a miner on Tatooine, but the rest of her story is bantha poo-doo!" She said that she would like to try and find her brother if we had time during our visit to Tatooine. I nodded not replying to whether or not Lena had been lying and told her that we would try to find her brother. I decided to drop the subject for now and let her have time to think over things. We went to the shop and bought a few supplies then returned to the Ebon Hawk.
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It was after dinner and I had sat down to practice on my mandovil when Juhani approached me asking if now was a good time to ask me to tell my story. I nodded to her and asked her if she had ever used adrenals. She shook her head and said that her race had no need of such things; they produced enough of their own. I asked her if she knew what they did for humans and she said that she supposed they acted like hers helping us to react quicker and with more strength. I nodded and asked if she had ever heard of hyper battle adrenals, Carth overheard at this point and came over saying that he didn't like those stims, too many people had used them and went into either insane rages or became incapacitated with fear.
Juhani was surprised and looked at me inquiringly and I nodded to her. "Yep my first experience with hyper battle adrenals, I went into a rage and yelled something at the instructor about how I would rip his heart out and feed it to him" I grinned and chuckled at this point. Juhari's eyes were wide and I noticed that everyone seemed to be listening now, including Bastila who had just boarded the ship. She was staring at me astonished having come into the conversation late. "I think I got as far as lunging toward him when the two safeties started beating on me with the stun batons and brought me down. I don't really remember that part well I just remember coming to face down on the matt with two very heavy guys on top of me. My instructor grabbed me by the hair and flashed a light in my eyes to see if I was concussed and laughed at me. He told me that he hadn't realized I cared for him so much then told me to get up and get back in line. He then started yelling at everyone else that they would have their turn as well and not to think the same thing wouldn't happen to them."
I paused and Juhani said "so you attacked your teacher in a rage as well, yet you obviously have learned to deal with your anger, how?" I grinned at her and said "Well a lot of work with my assigned therapist on how to handle anger, I kept trying to keep it under control, trying to suppress it. Every time I went on battle adrenals it spun out of my ability to suppress and I lost all semblance of control. She finally got me to realize that I wasn't doing well with my attempts and taught me that I didn't have to control my anger at all. I just had to control whether or not I choose to react to it. I had to totally relearn how to deal with my emotions but I have to admit two huge guys in full armor with stun batons is really, really good incentive to learn quickly. Its an odd feeling when you do learn it, rather like being in the center of a whirlwind, you emotions always try to get you to react to them and its hard not to because its instinctive to think that emotion and reaction are the same thing. But you can separate them, feeling the emotions but still being calm. We used to say in training 'We are sentient beings, with animal bodies, we have the choice to react as the sentient being or as the animal'. We are all evolved from ancestors that learned to think and the instincts that served us well when we were not intelligent are still hardwired into our bodies. I know most people don't even realize how much their natural adrenal reactions drive their emotions. But the brain feels the body's reaction to adrenals and attempts to assign emotions to them, usually fear or anger."
I paused and looked at Juhani. She nodded and said "Yes, the fight with Quatra was intense and I could feel my anger growing as she pressed me. I attempted to control my emotions but at some point I slipped and my anger overwhelmed me and I attacked her." I nodded and said "I thought as much, your body knew you were in danger during the fight and kept ramping up your hormones, you reacted both to the situation and the increased adrenals by feeling anger which eventually exceeded your ability to control. Consider what I said about trying to separate the emotion and your reaction to the emotion. They don't have to follow the other automatically, but it is not an easy thing to relearn."
Canderous said "Wise words, a warrior deals with fear just so, recognizing the bodies' reactions and the feelings that rise, refusing to react by cowering in fear but proceeding with on with what needs to be done."
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I was stowing the rest of my gear in my bunk later when Bastila came in and sat down on her bunk, looking at me curiously. I turned to here and said "You have something you want to ask me?" She looked surprised and said "I do. How did you know?" I was feeling mischievous so I replied "well... your face is all scrunched up like a kinrath pup." She immediately became the Jedi princess and said "A... a kinrath pup?! It most certainly is not!" I sat back to watch the show paying little attention to what she said until she said "My thoughts remain hidden, including whatever my feelings are for you. Uh... I mean whatever I feel about you... uh... I mean whatever I think about you." By now she was blushing intensely and I could only think of how beautiful she was and how desirable. I said smiling "You're so cute when you're embarrassed." If anything she flushed deeper and said "I... that is, you... Why must you be so impossibly infuriating?! You know very well what I'm talking about. I'm referring to the bond between us; the one the Jedi Council spoke of. Our connection allows us glimpses into each other's mind. We can feel some of what the other feels. And what I feel within you troubles me."
I listened with half an ear I knew the rote speech already about the dark side and was starting to feel a bit abused by all of it. I mean it was like they were saying we know you are going to fall to the dark side, it's predestined. If they went on and on like this with all their Padawans its no wonder they just went over to the dark side, at least they were away from the speeches. Our instructors in training had ragged on us but they had never implied that we would not succeed, just that we weren't trying hard enough to succeed and to stop being lazy. Bastila was winding down some and saying"... relatively little training could have terrible consequences. For you, and for everyone around you." I couldn't help myself I just couldn't take it seriously right now "You could warn me when I do something bad. Blink once for dark side, twice for light" I said grinning.
Bastila said angrily "This is not a joke! The choices you make could affect both our destinies, not to mention the fate of the Republic and the entire galaxy! There is much at stake. Thankfully you have exhibited a degree of compassion and self-control up to this point. I sincerely hope you can maintain these traits in the future. We must all resist the influence of the dark side! It is everything we are fighting against! This is doubly important for you, with your natural affinity for the Force!"
She was angrier than I had usually seen her and the amusement value of her preaching at me while being so angry at me was not lost on me but I didn't think it was healthy for her so I asked mildly "Why are you getting so upset?" That deflated her and I could see her getting her anger back under control, she shoved stuff down, it was no wonder it got away from her all the time. She said "I'm sorry if I come across as harsh. But I am concerned. For you, for our mission. And for myself, as well. Our destinies are intertwined. Everything that one of us does will have consequences for the other. Any reckless behavior on your part is likely to affect me as well."
I suddenly realized she really was concerned that I might affect her for the worse with my emotions. I got up and moved around to face her and knelt on one knee on the deck in front of her putting myself on eye level with her. I thought about how utterly certain I was of this one fact and sent that through the bond and said "I won't do anything to hurt you." She looked at me searchingly and said "I believe you truly mean what you say. For now. But sometimes it is not easy to keep such promises. Your power could be a gift or a curse. When you need guidance, or advice, or support I will do my best to help you stay on the path of the light." I sighed to myself and said "I would appreciate any help you could offer" and vowed to myself to be more pleasant the next time she felt the need to lecture me. I really didn't want her to be upset and worrying about me. She said "I only hope I have the wisdom to help you through the dark times." I nodded to her and got back up and continued stowing my gear.
I kept my thoughts close so she wouldn't realize how worried about her I was, I knew the masters had their reason for not sending along a senior Jedi but for her sake I wish they had. She had so little self confidence that it angered me. She was proud of her Battle Meditation but underlying it was a sense that she was only of worth to the Jedi because of it. I was angry for a moment at the Council but then remembered how many times Master Vandar and Khar had said that we should support one another. Maybe that was my task, to get her to trust in her own strength.
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The next morning we left for Tatooine, during the hyperspace trip I had a chance to talk to Carth again, he had been very quiet and had been avoiding me since our last discussion/confrontation. I finally cornered him and asked what the matter was. He said that he felt that he was being left out of the loop and why had they sent Bastila and I off without a Master Jedi at the very least. I nodded and said that Bastila and I were a special case because we had a force bond. He gave me an odd look but continued questioning me as to why we were being sent off after the Star Maps. I shrugged at him unable to give him a better reason and he said "I'll tell you this much... I am not going to wait around until I'm betrayed again!" I looked at him steadily and said "I am not going to betray you. I am not Saul" He said something about seeing about that and then realized what he had just said from my outraged stare. Carth said "Look, I didn't mean it that way." I raised my eyebrow at him unconvinced. "I want to get to Saul, not.... no... no, forget it. It seems all I can do is insult you, isn't it? Just forget I said anything." he finished and turned away and left for the men's quarters.
I shook my head and went to see how Mission was doing. She was in our quarters talking to Juhani, I came in and overheard her asking "How did you come to be a Jedi?" I was curious to hear this myself so I seated myself on my bunk and listened. Juhani nodded to me and answered Mission "Well... It goes back a number of years... Back on my home world we did not see Jedi very often, especially where I lived."
Mission asked "Where did you live?" Juhani answered "The hind end of space. A pit of a world, to be sure. Where Jedi rarely tread... But we had heard of them. Well, everyone had, so that is not to be unexpected. Champions of truth. Defenders of justice. Heroes of the Republic. It was very easy for a child to be enthralled by their image, their mystique. May be I was one of those children."
I broke in and asked curiously "Did you meet a Jedi?"
Juhani nodded to me and said "Yes... yes I did. When I saw a Jedi for the first time they lived up to everything my imagination had created them to be. I was awed... and maybe a bit enamored..." Mission said "So what did you do?" Juhani continued "From that moment on I knew that I would have to try to become a Jedi. To lift myself out of the rut I had been living in for years and to make a real difference, as the Jedi were. The foolish delusions of a child. But this child made it happen. As soon as I was able I left my world and went in search of them. I found them and was accepted. I had been living my dream on Dantooine for several years before you came. Although... perhaps I was not entirely ready for it... or not completely suited to the task. Otherwise I would not have fallen..." with the last she looked at me and said "But thanks to you I have been redeemed. Perhaps I may yet live to see that dream of mine come true."
I said to her "If you want to be a Jedi you have the strength within yourself to become one Juhani. Of that I have no doubt." She looked surprised and maybe gratified in my confidence in her and nodded to me. Juhani left after that going off somewhere else and left me alone with Mission.
I took the opportunity to ask Mission how she was doing. Mission admitted that perhaps Lena had been right when she said that Griff always blamed other people for his problems. I asked her if she believed Lena now and she said that she didn't, but maybe it was Griff's idea to leave her behind, maybe he had thought he would come back later and get her. Maybe he had skipped out on some debts and had to leave her behind so it would look like he was coming back. I didn't want to appear too harsh on her brother but I wondered if she realized what she was saying about him. I simply said that it sounded like how they had come to Taris. She started to agree then realized what she was saying and finally said that perhaps Lena was right. She realized she had been idolizing her brother and not seeing his faults, but she still wanted to go find him and speak to him herself and see what he had to say. I nodded to her and told her we would definitely inquire on Tatooine for her brother.