Thanks you so much for your reviews. At first I thought no one going to review and it scared me...thought you didn't like me anymore. But now I know you don't so I'm all better now.

Sorry for the late update. I'm working on two other stories which I hope to be posting soon.

Leya: Thanks for your review and I will continue in the present time. I'm glad you like it. I also wish that the writers would just put Jake and Peyton together...they're perfect for each other!

RockerChick45: I'll try to update faster if you can't stop reading! LOL! I love people like you that enjoy AND review! Thanks!

Blukay2008: I know Brooke's parents are mean but they may change (HINT)! Thanks for reviewing!

Sorry if I missed anyone, I'll get you next chapter if you review!

Remember to review!! Hope you enjoy!!

And now the next chapter!!

That night was crazy; full of new beginnings and new discoveries. So was the following weeks. Some people got there feelings out while others suppressed things that were on their chests. The thing is, once you say something it's hard to take it back.

They were all sitting around at lunch, eating with some side conversations. Nothing to big was going on besides Jake and Peyton finally hooking up; it was long awaited. Peyton was paying all her attention to Jake, Brooke to Lucas and Haley to Nathan. Someone caught Peyton's eye; Madison.

Peyton and Madison had been getting closer and closer over the past week. They were just so alike but so different at the same time. Madison aired her feelings for everyone to see, whereas Peyton hide her feelings in her drawings and comic strip.

"Madison," Peyton smiled seeing her new friend, "What's up?"

All heads turned. What was Madison was doing here, at school? Wasn't she supposed to be in a mental institution some where half way across the country.

"Hey Peyt." She said standing timidly at the head of the table.

Peyt? Only her close friends called her Peyt. What gave Madison the right to call their Peyton Peyt.

"You want to sit?" Peyton asked, seeming even happier once Madison showed up.

"Is that alright?" Madison gestured to the rest of the table. No one said no but no one said yes either. Madison sat down unsure of what to do next.

"Are we still on for later?" Peyton asked smiling.

"Later?" Jake asked quizzically, "What's later?"

"We're hanging out later." Peyton smiled at Jake.

Strange glances we exchanged across the table. Everyone felt the tension in the room. No one knew what to say or do. What were Peyton and Madison doing hanging out?

"That's cool," Jake tried to sound supportive, "But are you still going to be able to baby-sit Jenny later? 'Cause if you can't I'll find someone else."

"Yeah I'll take her with me." Peyton got to spend time with two of her favorite people.

An awkward silence fell over the group. No one wanted to say the wrong thing that could throw Madison over the edge again.

"Look guys," Madison finally said getting fed up with the awkwardness, "You don't have to treat me any different. I'm just like you guys, well, except for all my problems. But who doesn't have problems. I just deal with them differently than you guys do."

No one spoke. Everyone was at a lose for words. This pissed Madison off even more.

"God," Madison said getting fired up, "Do you want to know why I am the way I am?"

There was silence again. Peyton's smiled faded. She knew her friends were not going to like what Madison had to say.

"Do you know what it's like to hate yourself so much that it kills you inside; it makes you numb?" Madison's face was red with rage, "No you wouldn't have. You've all lived sheltered lives. Everything was always handed to you. You probably never had to work a day in your lives. You probably had a family that loved you and was proud of you. A family that was ashamed of you."

"Madison," Peyton tried to calm the girl down before she said something she'd regret tomorrow.

"Peyton, why don't you tell them?" Madison smiled sweetly, "Tell them everything you've gone through. Maybe it'll hit them harder than crazy old me will."

Everyone turned their attention to Peyton. She could not believe that Madison would tell them what they talked about. It was supposed to be their little secret.

"That's the only thing I can't stand about you Peyton," Madison said softly, "You tell me all your problems, troubles but then you come here with these 'friends' and you act like nothing is bothering your." Madison laughed lightly, "One thing I've learned in therapy was that the only way to heal is to talk about it."

"Peyton," Jake took her hand, "What's she talking about?"

"It's just," Peyton looked at Madison with eyes pleading for the courage that Madison had to just air her feelings. Finally she found that courage and poured her guts to her friends, "You don't know what it's like to not be able to feel anything anymore. When I lost my mom, I lost a piece of myself. Did you guys even know that I've been in and out of therapy since she died?"

They all shook their heads. They never knew anything really about how Peyton felt about her mom's death because she never talked to anyone.

"I didn't expect you guys to know; I never told you. It's just, until Madison came along, I didn't have anyone that could relate to me." Peyton felt tears threatening her eyes but she didn't want them to see her cry.

"Peyt, I don't have a dad. I know what it's like to not have two parents around." Lucas tried to help his friend through her hard time.

"Hell, Peyt, my parents are never home anyway." Brooke added. Peyton had been her best friend for as long as she could remember but she had never seen this side of her.

"Peyton, I've got a daughter." Jake didn't like seeing Peyton this way, especially if she could relate to Madison.

"It's not the same guys," Peyton missed the single tear that escaped and fell down her cheek; "You never had to feel that loss. I did and I live with it everyday. Until you lose someone so close to you you'll never know."

"I'm sorry Peyt," Brooke said walking around the table to give her best friend a hug, "I never knew you felt this way. I should've though; I'm supposed to be your best friend."

Peyton didn't say anything. She should know but she was too wrapped up in her own life and own problems to pay any attention to her best friends; but yet she couldn't blame Brooke at all. It was partially Peyton's part too, she never let anyone in.

"None of you would've known," Peyton wiped away another tear before it slipped down her cheek, "I haven't let anyone in after my mom died, just because I was afraid that once I was finally happy that I lose someone else that I loved. I couldn't deal with that kind of lose again."

"Peyton, you're never going to lose us." It was Jake's turn to hug her.

"Who says I won't." No one could answer. They didn't know if they were going to make it until tomorrow but at least they still had today.

"I can't promise you tomorrow, but I can promise you today." Jake said pressing his forehead against hers. He didn't want to lose her. He loved her so much and so did Jenny he couldn't stand to lose another woman he loved.

"But today is not enough for me because who says we're going to even make through today?" Peyton was on the verge of breaking down.

"Peyton if today isn't enough for you than neither am I," Jake shook his head in disbelief, "But when you talk about losing someone, I did. I lost the only girl I thought I'd ever love. I was a mess. But then I met you and I knew that wasn't true."

Peyton didn't know what to say. She had been so selfish and quick to judge. Maybe if she let them in they'd understand what she'd been going through.

"Thanks for listening guys." Peyton got up and ran away just in time because the tears were flowing now.

"I'm going after her." Brooke said standing up.

"No I got it." Madison pleaded with her eyes. Brooke sat back down and hugged Lucas. She didn't understand why Peyton felt she couldn't talk to her about all this.

"Peyton, you were amazing!" Madison hugged her as she dried her eyes in the bathroom.

"Don't you ever do that to me again!" Peyton yelled with relief, "I hate being put on the spot like that."

"But it feels good, doesn't it?" Madison raised her eyebrows.

"Where did you get so good at this healing thing?" Peyton laughed.

"I did pay attention some of the time at therapy. It wasn't a total waste of time." Madison figured if she couldn't save herself why not save someone else.

"I'm glad they were good for something." Peyton hugged Madison really tightly. Though she had only known Madison for a little over a week she felt closer to her than to Brooke, whom she had known all her life.

It was like they were soul mates, destined to find each other and pull each other out of the darkness. They depended on each other through those rough times. Just knowing that there was someone there for you made them both feel a little better.

Lucas, Brooke, Nathan, Haley and Jake were still shocked by yet another dramatic scene. It seemed the 'in' thing to do now was to have problems that needed attention immediately. It just scared them that Peyton felt like she was all alone all this time when they were all right there willing to listen to anything she had to say.

"Guys, let's promise each other to tell everyone how they feel all the time, so that no one feels like that ever again." Brooke felt horrible that her own best friend had felt so alone.

"I second that notion." Haley added with a head nod.

"Me three." Nathan chimed in finally.

"Me four." Next was Lucas.

"Me five." Jake didn't want to leave the group hanging.

"What I can't believe is how she ended up with Madison." Haley said the words that everyone was thinking. Leave it to Haley James to state the obvious.

"I guess they felt like they could relate to each." Jake defended both Peyton and Madison.

"But what scares me the most is that if the can relate and Madison is suicidal, does that mean Peyton's suicidal too?" Brooke asked with concern.

"I don't even know anymore. Today just showed how little we really know about her." Lucas answered before anyone else could. Peyton, his Peyton, couldn't tell him how she felt when he had poured his heart out to her so many times before.

"I wish I would've noticed this before. I'm supposed to be her boyfriend and I don't even know her." Jake shook his head in disbelief, "Can you two watch Jenny for me? I don't want to push her onto Peyton right now."

"Yeah, sure man. Anything you need." Lucas answered for the both of them. All they had planned was a little apartment shopping; nothing they couldn't do with Jenny around.

"Yeah we need the practice." Brooke put her hand on her slightly protruding belly, "In another few months there's going to be a little Scott running around."

"They don't run right after they're born Brooke; that takes about a year." Nathan joked.

"Shut up, Nathan." Brooke laughed, "You know what I meant."

"Not to scare you or anything but all the practice in the world won't prepare you for a child." Jake laughed.

"Thanks so much Jake for your helpful advice." Every laughed, almost forgetting all about what had gone down just a few minutes early.