The Gift

Episode 14: Conversations Kill

By Sulia Serafine

This is an ALTERNATE UNIVERSE fic. This is the sequel series to It Could Be Worse, which will end with season 4. NOTE: You can read it if you have not read ICBW. It's possible. You won't get the foreshadowing and the cameos, but you will, eventually. I'd explain them. Credit goes to Tamora Pierce. I'm broke, so you can't sue me. Any other copyrighted things that don't belong to me in here in fact belong to other very businesslike people. Could you believe that? I guess that's why I'm broke.

WARNING: This episode is rated R due to violence and Vinny's strong sense of nihilism.

I felt short on time. There was something else I needed to do before I effectively ended my life as Vinny Winston and became a nameless soldier of what looked like a long-lived conspiracy of manipulation and subversion. Only a day had passed. I had been given my own room in the dorm wing belonging to the Gray Men. Though my arm was still in a stiff splint and my ribs bandaged, I was now wearing the very uniform that had come to symbolize everything I had hated as a child.

Hey, if you can't beat them….

The bed was soft, at least. I lied down on it, flinging my uninjured arm over my eyes so as to block out the fluorescent glare that bothered me so much. There was no comfort in physical things. Not when my mind was plagued with uncertainty. What would they have me do from here? It is not as if I can use my skills in combat. All I can do is take a hit and recover quickly from it. And even that is not an instantaneous process.

My supposedly callous mind betrayed itself. As I scrunched my nose and screwed my eyes shut, I could still imagine inside my head all the things that I had left unresolved. My mother. Coram and Kimmy. Faleron. Yvenne. My father…

I lowered my arm from my face and glanced about the room for something to occupy myself with. These thoughts only made me despair, and I had no tolerance for mental anguish. I was going to work for the men I had despised. But I would be damned if I wasn't going to work on my own terms, completely in control of my mind as well as my body.

Pain shot through my abdomen as I slowly sat up. I held my breath for a few moments, waiting for the pain in my ribs to subside. There was a small table to my left, on which there was a single book. I steadied myself to start moving, knowing that it would cause me great labor just to cross the room.

However, I was deterred from my task when the door slid open, revealing someone I had not expected to see. Perhaps if my mind were not so distracted with pain, I would have foreseen his arrival. I forgot the book. Who needed a book when one had company to keep him entertained? This guy probably hated me—worse, he didn't understand me—but he ought to be worth some intellectual stimulation.

"Yo," I greeted.

Baker did not take too well to the slang. He gave me a funny look and entered, the door sliding shut behind him. He was not displaying his army fatigues, but the same gray uniform that I was wearing. Past his mostly emotionless expression, I could sense that he was feeling troubled by something. Feh. Whatever was troubling him could not be half as bad as what bothered me.

"I had a dream last night," he told me. The way he spoke it to me thus made me think that he had never dreamt in his entire life and this happening had all been my fault. How coincidental that a patient of Styx has once again come to me to confess their dreams. All my life people have talked to me as if I liked to listen. I should start considering pretending to be deaf. Sign language isn't that hard to learn, is it?

I tilted my head to the side and studied him pensively. Might as well get my Dr. Joyce Brothers face on. Can't imitate Freud. Not obsessed with sex enough. "And what did you dream about?"

For some reason, I suddenly felt like I was in Session. Except, of course, I was not the patient receiving evaluation, but the one giving it. Perhaps I should induce Baker to lie down on a couch, or in this case my bed, while I got out a clipboard and made inane "mm-hmm" noises while he talked.

Nah. I am not that cruel.

Baker paused before saying, "I dreamt that my comrades and I would die today."

My eyebrows rose. "Oh? Do you have a special mission to go on today that could possibly be fatal?"

"No. We are simply assigned to be here with the children, making them fear us."

Gee. The way he said it made it seem like the entire objective of a Gray Man's job was to make the children fear them. Considering all my childhood experiences with the orderlies, I wouldn't doubt that this was the truth. But honestly, how did they pick these guys? Which ones were sent to missions and which ones were assigned to stay behind at the hospital? I don't get it! Some of the guys assigned in my childhood were just happy to do the crossword on their lunch break!

"Tell me," Baker began, "about myself. When… I was a child."

His impassive face did not show any outward signs of eagerness, but it was not hard to tell that he desperately wished to know.

"You don't remember?"

"Nothing but my education," he replied, his eyes hinting at puzzlement.

I rubbed the back of my neck. What was there to say? Baker was this stoic kid who could glare at you until you were six feet underground. He wasn't talkative like Wally. I was somewhat surprised that he hung around us at all, when he could go off and be alone. But maybe he really had enjoyed our company. Strange thought, that.

"You helped me once," I volunteered. I couldn't think of anything else to say that was actually positive about him. "Your name was…is… Baker. And you helped me set up for my big escape from this hell hole."

"Why didn't I leave with you?"

Why didn't anyone?

I shrugged it off. "You didn't seem to care enough to leave. You looked satisfied just doing as you were doing."

He seemed to be pondering over what I had said. I sighed. There was nothing else for me to say, really. Except… "Hey."

"Yes?"

"Do you know whatever happened to a kid named Wallace Matthews?" I sought my mind for a description. "Kind of neurotic, has the ability to control water." When that still didn't draw a response, I recited the one thing that would. "Patient 0556."

Baker thought for a moment. He nodded. "He was in a contingent sent overseas when he turned nineteen."

Nineteen? Wally was already nineteen? And Baker must have been the same age, or else he wouldn't be a Gray Man yet. I'm still on seventeen. Since when have they been older than me? I could not have been the baby of the group! It doesn't matter much now. The only significance age has is telling me that I would still have had a year left in the hospital if I had never left. But sheesh… nineteen, huh? Sent overseas? Wait… for what?

I opened my mouth to ask him, but he was already shaking his head. He didn't know. And so it perpetuated the mystery.

He got up to leave. I wondered if anyone had known he was here visiting me. If they had, surely they would have called him away, perhaps punished him. Didn't they have cameras in my room? Perhaps not. Maybe they thought I was not worth the effort, since I had obviously given in and decided to become one of them. So maybe there's some hope after all.

Wait. Hope for what? What am I talking about?

I abandoned my original idea to read the book on the nearby table. Lying down again, I closed my eyes and decided another nap was in order. Sleeping would help me heal faster. Ow. Gods know I need to heal these bruised ribs as quickly as possible. I've never been more thankful for a fast healing body, but sometimes I wish the whole process were instantaneous. Then I could never feel pain! Hmm. Just a pretty thought.

The day went by. I was left in relative peace except for someone coming to deliver me lunch and dinner. I had to ask to go to the bathroom. A guard standing outside my room was charged with escorting me and waiting outside the bathroom. So they trust me enough to not have a camera in my room and enough to have a conversation with Baker, but not enough so that I can go to the toilet without escaping. What a load of crap! (No pun intended.)

After dinner, I felt my gift seize hold of me. It had been a long time since I'd had one. Being in this hospital has an effect on my gift, I think. But I felt it now, like a long lost friend.

Ouch. Yeah, a friend that causes migraines. I touched my temple and tried to focus on something in the room to anchor me down while the vision washed through my mind. There was a man whose face I could not see entering my room. He was not dressed like a killer, but he had a gun in his hand. Yeah, he had a gun in his hand like he was born with it. Now that's a truly scary thought.

And then, before I knew that my vision had ended, my door opened and he walked in.

"Whoa. That was fast," I muttered. I hadn't even worked out the details of what he was wearing or what type of gun he was holding. I stood up quickly, immediately regretting the action. I winced. At least I'd slept most of the day. It wasn't as painful as I thought it would be to stand up straight.

The man was dressed in a shirt and tie, with dark slacks and good leather shoes. Foreign made, I think. Man, I wish I looked that snazzy. All I had on was a gray uniform and a pair of sneakers. Putting aside the vain, pride-wounding fact that someone else looked better than me, I looked past the man into the hall outside. The guard that had been posted outside my door was slumped unconscious against the wall.

I cradled my injured arm to my chest as if I had to protect myself against him. "What do you want?"

It should have been obvious. But back then, I was suspicious of everyone. And a random guy walking into a room with a gun leaving unconscious men in his wake isn't exactly the most normal thing you'll ever see.

"I'm here to get you out."

"Who sent you?" I asked, trying to move towards the door while still keeping the same distance between me and the stranger.

The man noted my injured state with calculating eyes. He looked up and met my gaze. "Yvenne and Faleron." He walked toward the door again and peered out into the hall. "It won't take them long to get here. Let's go."

"Wait!" I whispered loudly as we ducked out of the room and into the hall, staying close to the wall. I licked my dry lips, ignoring the bolts of pain racing up my ribs. My arm didn't feel too bad at least.  "What do I call you?"

"Just call me Li. Now shut up."

I figured that if he was simply using Yvenne and Faleron to trick me, it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. If I stayed in the hospital, I'd become my own worst enemy. If I was used by this man and whatever organization he worked for, it had to have been better than Styx. And if Faleron and Yvenne had really sent him, then I was bound to be in for a happy reunion with my annoying companions. I didn't have a preference as to which ending I'd feel better with. An ending's an ending—never mind if it's happy, right?

I'm no Prince Charming.

There was a sound of many running footsteps approaching us. Li pushed me behind him and against the wall. He cocked his gun and waited for them to reach us. My heart was going a mile a minute. I wished I could be of some use. I feel like a sissy just standing here being rescued. It's not like I'm Snow White or anything. I'm blond, after all. Don't argue with me on that one.

"An even dozen," I suddenly said. I could make them out in my mind's eye a few seconds before they arrived around the corner. "There's an even dozen, but none of them are armed." I glanced around us. "They're coming at us from the hall along the cafeteria. Let's go down this way. We can get closer to the exit before they catch up."

Li nodded. Someone must have explained to him about my gift because he showed no hint of surprise at my information. We left around the next corner just as the Gray Men turned into the hall we were just in. There was a shout as they picked up speed. Li and I started running. My ribs hurt so much from the movement, but I didn't have much of a choice.

Yes, I do. I can just give up and work for Chiles. At least I'll have some status among the freaks.

But for some reason, I just kept running.

Without any warning, Li grabbed a handful of my shirt and practically flung me ahead of him. He whirled around then and fired two shots at our pursuers. The gunshots were loud and they hurt my ears. I watched wide-eyed as the Gray Men broke formation to avoid being shot. Li continued to step backward, urging me to do the same as he kept his gun trained on them. But what happened next took us both by surprise.

A long plume of fire came straight at us.

"Get down!" Li yelled.

I didn't need to be told twice. I hit the floor and I flattened myself against it, biting my lip to stifle any scream of pain I was wanting to let out. Li fired off another shot, screaming something along the lines of "damn, fuckin' pyrokinetics." I couldn't concentrate. The heat was unbearable! The smaller hairs on the back of my neck must have been singed. They must have been! Man, that's hot! I dared to open my eyes, squinting through the intense heat.

"Baker…" I murmured, meeting the gaze of my former 'friend.' He stood as if the chaos around us did not exist. I knew he was thinking of his dream. That today would be the day that everyone died. I shook my head at him then, trying to tell him otherwise. He wouldn't die. I didn't foresee that! He was just a pawn, just like I was a pawn! No one needed to die—

Except the one person who mattered.

The fire had ceased. Li had shot the Gray Man (former Styx patient, naturally) who had created the flame, in the leg so now the man was writhing on the floor. We scrambled to our feet and looked about for a direction to head in.

"Which way is the head office? Where are the ringleaders?" Li asked me, his eyes still locked on our enemies. He had gotten the same idea as I had. Kill the doctors. Kill Chiles, kill Ansil, kill them all. The bloodthirsty notion was all that set my mind at ease then.

I glanced to my left. "That way. The exit's that way, too." I looked again to Baker, who had decided to stand in front of his comrades like a fearless leader. He always looked like one anyway, if not a brooding boy. "Baker! We're ending this!" I called. Please, gods, make him listen to reason… "It's over. Just tell them to let us go and I'll end all of it. And you won't have to be 0554 anymore. Just Baker."

He didn't show any signs of agreeing with me, but he and the other Gray Men stayed in place as we darted around the corner. The intensity of his emotionless gaze stayed with me as we fled. I could feel myself hurting all over from new and old aches, but with each step, we were getting closer to the end. I wanted the end.

I stopped us in front of an office. It belonged to Chiles. Maybe the bastard was inside. It would be easy. Like fish in a barrel. Li looked to me for confirmation. I nodded and stepped aside. Li stepped forward and kicked open the door, brandishing his gun and charging inside. Unfortunately, no one was there. There were, however, numerous maps and numerous papers scattered all over the office. I went in after Li, scanning the papers.

"These are reports. From spies all over Mithros. He's sent them everywhere!"

"Get on his computer," Li commanded. "Make a copy of the files—anything incriminating. We need something to give to the DJPF."

I sat in the doctor's chair. As the computer started booting up, I turned and surveyed what papers were available to fold and stuff in my pockets. You would think that someone as evil as Chiles would have learned to use a filing system, but apparently not. Evil has no need for organization in this case, I suppose. Not that it matters. We were going to bring an end to it anyway.

"Someone's coming," I muttered. I could feel them approaching in my mind, like a tickle in my nerve endings starting to increase. I quickly scanned the file directory of the computer and discovered some key phrases that were sure to include choice information. What else could 'Baby Acquisitions in Tortall" and "Drug Experimentation" be? I copied the files and extracted the disk. I placed it in my pocket and nodded to Li.

We ran out of the office just in time to Ansil Groten and Doctor Chiles come toward us. Li looked to me again.

I nodded. Yes, that's them.

He didn't need another signal. He raised his gun and shot both men perfectly in the heart. The movement was so quick. I had barely time to reflect on what had just happened. My body jerked twice like the bullets had hit me instead, though I had not intended on being so surprised by their deaths. As the bodies fell to the floor, everything became oddly quiet. I was neither frightened by Li's perfect marksmanship nor his silence. But there was something in the bodies themselves that refused to let me think it was over. But it was… wasn't it?

It's never truly over. There will be more of them if we don't get this information to the authorities.

More reason to scram. I looked to Li, who simultaneously turned to me. There was a mixture of regret and something else in his expression. For someone I had just met, I somehow knew that this was a feeling he was not used to. I frowned.

"Don't tell Yvenne."

That you killed people today?

"Yeah, that," he replied irritably.

I blinked. "Wait, how did you—"

He grabbed me by my shirt again and dragged me towards the exit. Just as I expected, no one followed us. By then, Baker must have taken charge of the Gray Men and explained to them the end was drawing near. The private Apocalypse of Styx. I wonder what the children were thinking when they heard the gunshots. They would never have heard the sounds before. They must be full of imaginative ideas as to what was going on.

Oh, to be naïve again.

We were running down the steps of the hospital now and to his car. As soon as we were inside, he sped off. The squeal of tires and the skid marks on the asphalt made my happy. We were out of there. No question about it. I didn't bother asking myself how Li had gotten the gate open or how he had managed to get to my room undetected. Those things did not matter. Not for people like us who obviously had more secrets and talents than the world would ever know.

There was not a cloud in the sky. Several dark birds flew overhead. I could hear them squawking to one another, perhaps on their way to Baker, their bird whisperer. I resisted the urge to stick my head out the window like a dog and take in the scenery. Anything was better than four white walls and a stupid hospital bed. I wanted to go out and buy some new clothes. I couldn't wear this white uniform anywhere. It was the ugliest thing I had ever put on.

I glanced at Li, who still had the shirt, tie, and pressed slacks. Leather patent shoes, for crying out loud! He is not allowed to look better than me!

I looked down at myself and remembered the contents of my jacket.

"When are we going to give this to the authorities?" I asked, gesturing to my stuffed pockets.

"We'll give it to your dad when we reach his house," Li replied distractedly, watching the road for any white vans belonging to the hospital.

I stared at him. "You know my dad?"

"Yeah. But we're going to pick up Yvenne and Faleron first, so get ready to say whatever it is you need to say to them before you make a reunion script for you and your pops."

There was an undertone of anger in his voice. It was obvious that he did not like my father. I was sure there was a good reason, too. After all, I've pissed off a lot of people in my life. It must be a family trait. And what was this about giving my father the evidence? Was he connected to the DJPF? But I thought he had worked for Yukishiro like the men at Bailey's had said. Oh no. My father was a lowly rat. He was an informant. That was it, wasn't it? Former bad guy lives under government protection because he rats out his former comrades to the DJPF.

Damn.

"I told you to start thinking of your two chums, not your old man," Li scolded me.

I glared at him. "Would you mind staying out of my head?"

Li snorted. "You're more annoying than he is. I didn't think it was possible. And considering the fact that I just broke you out, you'd better do as I say."

"Yeah, yeah," I grumbled. I looked for road signs. "Where are we anyway?"

"We're going to Irontown. Where else?"

Oh yeah. I had forgotten about that place. It was where I went after I first broke out of the hospital as a child. I had tried my best to mind my own business, but people couldn't help but stare at an unsupervised child going through stores and buying food. I tried to walk around with the air of someone who was merely passing through. Like one of those children who rode the public transportation system all the time to get to divorced and separated parents.

Irontown wasn't that bad of a place. Not too big. Not too small. Like a suburb without a big neighboring city. Just a little less than a city with even less problems. I could never live there. Not one my ego and my ambitions were too big. I needed Carthak. I needed Tortall. Hell, just take me to good old Tusaine. Now that was the best city in the universe.

Li snorted derisively.

I glared at him. I said 'stay out'!

My mind eventually drifted back to my initially unwanted companions. Yvenne and Faleron. After this, Faleron would most definitely go home. His time with us would be up. He would be back in school, telling all sorts of stories to his classmates. And when he arrived home, he would be grounded, I bet. His parents and whoever else would be so very mad that he'd gone out and had a life without their permission. The little kid was smart and he had spunk. He would go far in life if he could just learn to ditch the privilege he was born in.

Yvenne was a different story. She already had her own life. She'd had one long before I met her. She would have continued to have one without me had I never noticed her Carthak that one fateful day. When all of this was over, she would take root in Port Legann and start over. She expected to do some small work at first, under a fake high school diploma and whatever other credits I had forged for her. I think she'll end up as manager of some small fast food restaurant eventually. Then she'll have saved up money from her job and from whatever sports gambling she does to take night classes. And she'll be alright.

I glanced at my driver. He had said… "Don't tell Yvenne." Why? Why shouldn't I tell Yvenne that you killed two men today? And why does she matter that she shouldn't know? I suddenly remembered the dream I had had, the one where someone with dark hair and dark eyes was holding Yvenne's hand. I scrutinized Li. Dark hair, dark eyes. "Don't tell Yvenne," he had said. Don't tell her.

What's she to you?

"Why do you care?" he asked in a retort.

"I… I don't," I defended.

"Bullshit."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Hey, man—"

"You blondies are always full of shit," Li spat. He kept his eyes on the road, but I knew fire was burning in those dark eyes of his.  "Look, you either care, or you don't. If you don't care, then don't think about it. Just separate yourself from the whole situation. If you do, then stop denying it. It's pathetic to listen to."

I didn't know if I cared or not. Back inside Styx, I thought I had been relieved to have her off my back. But then I had felt abandoned, because if Yvenne didn't care enough to help me, who would? But she had sent help. She'd sent this very disagreeable, volatile man right beside me. He hated me. He hated my father. And he obviously had a thing for Yvenne. I wonder what the hell had happened between the two of them while I was gone. It's not like twenty-four hour romances work out. We're not in a Shakespearian play, after all.

I laughed inwardly. And Yvenne sure doesn't make a good Juliet.

Li then used his middle finger and his thumb to flick me hard on the back of my ear.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

They were waiting for us at a diner. Before we went inside, Li handed me a bundle of clothes. He would go in ahead of me and distract the two while I snuck into the bathroom to change. He must have read my mind. He knew my vanity. I couldn't let Yvenne and Fal see me in this disgusting white thing. They wouldn't stop making jokes about it for days. It was the last thing I should have been worrying about. I mean, my arm was still broken and we had just escaped something equivalent to an insane asylum. But the little things like this mattered. What else was there to enjoy, if not the stupid little details?

Life sucked so much. You needed to wring out every last drop and savor it before it all ended.

So I snuck into the bathroom.

It was a one toilet deal, so I locked the door behind me and hoped no one would be waiting. Didn't want to draw attention to myself, even if I was out of danger now. Nah. I was never out of danger. What a foolish thought. I looked at the dirty mirror in front of me and sneered. I looked horrible. My hair wasn't washed and hung limp. I looked around and spotted a bottle of liquid soap sitting on the sink. I stripped off the white uniform jacket and the shirt underneath, being careful of the splint on my arm. It wasn't so bad right now. I would be able to take off the splint in a week, I guessed, if my body remained just as freakish as it was seventeen years ago. But, it wouldn't be that bad of an idea to pick up some over-the-counter painkillers next.

I used the liquid hand soap and the sink to attempt to wash my hair. Then I took as many paper towels as I could and dried myself off. I ran the wet towels over my skin. Despite the fact that I had been locked up in a hospital, I still felt so dirty. There may have been sterilized objects everywhere and not a spec of dirt on the floor despite all the children that roamed there… but the place was just so intrinsically dirty. Not physically, but… you know. Excuse me if I'm not articulate while in the middle of hygiene routine.

I put on the clothing that Li gave me—and trust me, doing all of this more or less with one hand was proving to be quite the challenge. I examined the clothing I was given. A white dress shirt. I peered at the tag. Ah. The man may annoy the hell out of me, but he has taste. The jeans looked brand new. And even more astonishing was that they were a perfect fit. Li had done his research. Though how he had gotten this information, through Yvenne or otherwise, I didn't really care to know. I put my sneakers back on and looked at my reflection in the mirror. Yes, a little more presentable. Not my most dashing, but it would suffice.

Back in the dining area, Li was having a cup of coffee. He sat across from Yvenne and Faleron, who was eating a piece of pie. The boy was wearing a baseball cap. Both were wearing sunglasses. And instead of the usual plain ponytail, Yvenne had done up her hair in a very small bun. She spotted me as soon as I started making my approach.

"Vinny?"

Faleron gasped. "Vinny!"

The boy darted up from his chair and ran around the table. He almost knocked me over with the speed with which he ran at me. I let out a small 'oof' as we collided. My ribs still hurt, but the boy didn't need to know that. It would bring up too many questions that I didn't want to answer. He laughed in delight as I patted his back and worked up a weak smile.

"Hey, Squirt." I rested my hand on top of his soft hair. "Sorry we didn't get that ice cream."

He looked up at me with that familiar expression of hero worship. Whenever I needed an ego boost, I knew I could count on him. "That's alright. I know it wasn't your fault. We looked for you for so long! We were so worried!"

"Yes, are you okay?" Yvenne asked tightly. She remained seated with Li.

I walked up to the table, unlatching Faleron from my waist and nudging him to sit back down. I took the only seat left next to Li, who continued sipping his coffee as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening. First he upstaged me in dress and now he upstages me in the 'cool demeanor' area, too. I really didn't like this guy.

"Yeah. They broke my arm and stuff, but I'm fine," I shrugged.

"Your arm?! We have to go to a hospital then!"

"No!" Li and I protested at the same time. We glanced at each other in irritation.

I shook my head. "No. No hospital. It's not as bad as you think. I'll be fine." I licked my lips nervously. "Listen, Yvenne. Can we talk? In private?"

She frowned at me, glancing back and forth from me, Liam, and Fal. She nodded, very confused. "If you want. Excuse us for a second, guys."

She got up and followed me outside of the diner. I looked around just to make sure there were no white vans. You never know. They might still be after me. Though after killing Chiles and Groten, and Baker taking charge, I had little doubt that things were over for Styx. I leaned against a nearby handicapped parking sign and waited for Yvenne to get comfortable. She decided to sit on a bench just outside the diner's door. The glowing "OPEN" sign for the diner was flickering on and off above her head.

"So what's the deal with this Li guy? How do you know him?" I asked.

Then Yvenne told me about being put in a holding cell for the night after Neal had recognized Faleron at the DJPF station. She described the things that Li had told her about himself, or at least, what he was willing to reveal. The way she spoke about him made it seem as if she trusted him completely. Weird. If someone told me that he'd killed quite a few people for a living, I'd have walked away rather than kissed him. I told Yvenne that with a disapproving look in my eyes.

"What do you know anyways?" she huffed.

I rolled my eyes. "It's not like you'll see him after today anyway."

"Actually, he's coming with me to Port Legann."

Hold up…

"What?" I exclaimed.

The former bookie tried to maintain a look of holier-than-thou dignity that did not suit her. She folded her arms across her chest and glared at me defiantly. "After all of this is over, I'm going to Port Legann and Li is coming with me."

"You do know what this man does for a living, right?"

"That's used to do—and yes, I do. That doesn't matter. I trust him, even if you aren't capable of imagining it."

Women are ruled by their emotions. I know I don't have the experience to say it, but just take a damn look! My mother! Yvenne! The only level-headed woman I have ever met must have been Kalasin… and she's a freaking spy! Oh man, is this aggravating. I don't know what sort of logic Yvenne was using, but it didn't make any sense. This is exactly the reason why I have never liked to get involved with women. Ever. They're just too… gah! Screw it!

I ground my teeth. "But you don't love him, Yvenne."

"Not yet."

"You…" I tried to stifle my anger. "You love me. I know you do. That thing back with the beauty pageant… that kind of stuff just doesn't fade away that fast!"

She glared at me. "So?"

Oh my gods, I'm in the Twilight Zone.

"So?! So! So you're in love with me! And you're admitting it! Why are you going to Port Legann with him?"

Yvenne laughed bitterly. "Because you don't know what love is, Vinny. I may love you, but you don't know what it is to love! And he does! And you could never learn to love like that because you still think that the world is one giant problem that you have to put up with!" She threw up her hands in the air in frustration. "Damn it, Vinny! The only reason you don't want me to go with him isn't because you're jealous. Being jealous would imply that you really care." She pointed at me accusingly, her eyes narrowing. "The real reason that you're reacting this way is because you're possessive. You're proud, you're vain, and you're possessive. The only reason you want me around is because you know I love you and it makes you feel good, even if you could never love me back. Even if you don't want me, you don't want anyone else to have me."

 Holy shit. I'm going to die a virgin.

"Yvenne…"

"Save it. Besides, Li warned me about the men in your family. You're all a bunch of deceivers who can't relate to people without hurting them first."

And the sad part is, I didn't feel that offended. It actually sounded pretty accurate.

"We'll be friends always, Vinny. But that's it," she whispered.

I nodded dumbly. She was right. That was it. But oooohh, if the truth didn't piss me off so much!

I don't know what love is.

I don't know what love is? What the fuck?

This was not my day.  I stifled all my rage and all my disappointment and—oh gods, why couldn't I feel any hurt?—and shoved it all down to a place where I would never have to feel it again. I couldn't handle something like this. Not with so many other things to worry about.

We went back inside. Faleron seemed to be chatting up a storm, but Li wasn't listening. He shot me a dark look before gazing concernedly at Yvenne. Faleron finished his pie and Li left money for the bill and a tip for the waitress. We left the diner in silence. I could tell that Yvenne was still sulking over our conversation. Liam was brooding about me and my crudeness, most likely. And Faleron seemed wise enough to know not to bother any of us. As we got into the car, Li turned to the back seat where Faleron and Yvenne were.

"Hey, Fal, do you know the way to your Aunt Kel's? We have to pass something onto her, some stuff we picked up," he said, glancing at my balled up jacket with the documents still inside.

I groaned. "Don't tell me he has more relatives that are in the DJPF."

Fal nodded. "Yeah, I know the way. And she's not my real aunt. Just my godmother."

"Oh. Of course. Excuse me. Godmother."

"Can the sarcasm," Yvenne told me, rolling her eyes. Well, she got over our little heart-to-heart in a flash. Hmph. Women.

Li began to back out of the parking space. I spoke up. "So what about my father? I thought you said we were going to see him."

"We're going to see Kel," he said in a voice that booked no arguments. I should have known better than to say anything at all.

'I've hated three generations of your family now,' a voice said inside my head. It sounded like Li. I glanced over at the man driving. Like before, he kept his eyes on the road. It must have been him. No, I thought cynically. It's God. I slumped further down into my seat and looked wearily out the window.

What does that matter to me? I replied to him mentally.

'Just thought you should know. I think you're a giant family of self-martyring assholes.'

Thank you, I replied mentally. I took it as a compliment.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Author's note:

Hey guys!

Well, we're finally here. The next episode will be the very last of The Gift. It won't be posted until after the ICBW series ends after ICBW4: Episode 12. So I really hope you've enjoyed yourself so far! Vinny has to be one of my favorite characters to write. He's so arrogant sometimes, concerned with his looks and his wit… at other times, he completely loathes himself and everything he is. But he just can't help it. Loves and hates himself, like a lot of us do. I'm really going to miss writing about him.

Remember to review, kiddies! And I'll see you again soon in the next episode!

Sulia S.