Adventures in Ice Skating
Denise walked down the blue carpeted steps of the apartment building and stood outside the door of Carman's apartment. She was carrying her shimmery white ice skates over her shoulder.
"Hey anorexic bitch! Are you in there? Let's go!" screamed Denise, pounding on the door.
The door opened and Carman stood ready to go, holding a pair of ice skates too.
"Come on in, just let me get my coat." Carman said.
Denise rolled her eyes, but went inside anyway.
"So...anorexic bitch, are you ready to skate or what?" Denise asked as Carman pulled her purple fuzzy jacket.
"I guess...I haven't skated in so long, I don't even know if I remember how." Carman said.
"I'm sure you'll get the hang of it again," Denise said, "Now come on!" She grabbed Carman by the arm and they ran together towards Stark's Pond.
"Why are we running so fast? You don't want to skate that bad do you?" Carman called as Denise tugged her along.
Denise laughed, "No you dumb ass!"
"Oh you wanna see jew boy right?" Carman realised.
"Exactly." Denise answered as they climbed over the hill that overlooked Stark's Pond. The pond looked beautiful as it glistened under a pack of ice. Cartman, Kyle, Kenny, Stan, Wendy, and Butters were all sitting nearby a log. Denise and Carman ran over to them.
"Look who's here." said Kyle.
"Yeah-"Denise smiled.
"No, I mean look who's here!" Kyle said again, pointing behind him. Denise turned and to her luck, Fran was right behind her.
"You bitch!" scowled Denise.
"What is she doing here?" Stan asked.
"She must have followed us." shrugged Denise.
Fran took a stick and started wacking Denise on the butt with it. Cartman started laughing histeracly.
"Are we skating or what?" demanded Wendy.
"What are you doing here?" Denise asked, trying to grab the stick from Fran's clutches.
"I came here with Stan," answered Wendy, "We're going out."
Denise smiled, braking the stick in two and pushing Fran into a snow bank nearby, "Yeah Stan's cute...but not as cute as Kyle."
Kyle blushed and Cartman laughed, "The Jew's blushing!"
"SHUT UP Cartman!" Kyle cried, still blushing at Denise.
"Shall we skate then?" Denise took Kyle's mittened hand in hers and they slid out onto the ice.
"Come on Stan." Wendy announced and pulled Stan onto the ice with her.
Carman turned to Cartman, "I haven't ice skated in a long time..." she said nervously.
"It's not that hard, if a Jew can do it, than so can you." Cartman said.
Carman smiled, "Eric, you're funny."
Cartman smiled too, "I am? No one's ever said that one before."
"Hey dumb asses! Let's get out here, huh?" Denise called from the ice, skating alongside with Kyle.
"Well we should go...and uh skate then." said Carman, glancing over at Cartman nervously.
"Sure..." Carman said hesitantly then he glanced over at Carman who was slowly (yet wobbily) moving her way onto the ice unsteadily in her skates.
"Do you knew help?" Cartman asked.
"Please!" yelled Carman, just as she said that she fell forwards, but was caught by Cartman.
She looked up at him, clutching to his round middle.
"Thank you." she said.
"Oh...sure...yeah." Cartman answered. He looked down at her, but right then he wished he hadn't. Carman was looking up at him, her bright big eyes shining, her face was turning a bit red from the Colorado cold.
Cartman helped her to her feet, but they were still clutching hands. Denise skated past them perfectly, then she started skating backwards.
"Hey everybody look at me!" she cried.
"Show off." muttered Wendy to Stan.
"Awesome!" cried Kyle, who was standing by himself now watching her in awe.
"Hey Kenny! Butters! Are you guys going to skate with us?" Kyle called. Kenny was sitting on the ground by a log and Butters was next to him.
"All right fellas, I suppose so." Butters answered, "Come on Kenny."
"Okay." said Kenny and he and Butters joined everybody else on the ice. The afternoon flew by and none of the kids really knew it, they were having so much fun. Fran even joined them out on the ice, trying to out skate Denise and getting in her way.
"Hey fat ass! I'm surprised you don't fall through the ice!" teased Wendy.
"Ay! I'm not fat I'm just big boned!" Cartman screamed back, then he turned to Carman and asked, "Am I fat?"
Carman giggled and playfully poked him in the stomach, "I think you're cute," she said, "Hey try and catch me!"
Carman started skating faster and it took Cartman loads of painful effort to chase after her, but he was having fun, and for once not complaining about anything.
"Isn't this fun Kenny?" Butters asked, looking over at Kenny.
"Sure why not?" was Kenny's reply, he didn't really enjoy being addressed by Butters.
"Hey wanna see what I can do?" Butters asked, but before Kenny could even reply, Butters was off skating around, he did a triple axle and twirled, and suddenly, his ice skate flew right off of him!
Everyone watched in horror as the ice skate sailed threw the air and landed in Kenny's face. He fell onto the ice in a splatter of blood, with the ice skate still impaled into his face.
"Oh my god! He killed Kenny!" screamed Kyle in horror.
"You bastard!" cried Stan, pointing at Butters.
Butters covered his face in his hand, "Goddamnit! Not AGAIN!!" he screamed.
Denise, Wendy, Fran, and Carman just looked at each other in horror.
"We gotta help him!" cried Denise.
"He's too poor to have a funeral." sighed Cartman.
"I have finally seen death..." said Carman softly.
Cartman put his hand on her shoulder for comfort.
"Poor kid...there's no help for him now." Wendy said.
"I can't stand it any longer!!" screamed Butters, and he ran off.
"What are we going to do?!" screamed Denise, biting her nails nervously.
"What...we always do?" said Kyle looking confused.
Denise, Carman, and Fran stared at Kyle like he was crazy.
"What do you mean...like you always do?" asked Denise.
Kyle looked down at his feet.
Stan shrugged.
Cartman laughed.
Wendy stared blankly into space.
Kenny bled.
After a few more moments of akward silence, Carman held up her hand excitedly.
"Let's hold a funeral for him!"Carman cried.
Read on into Chapter 3 for what happens when Kenny actually has a funeral!! Hope you liked it!!
Denise walked down the blue carpeted steps of the apartment building and stood outside the door of Carman's apartment. She was carrying her shimmery white ice skates over her shoulder.
"Hey anorexic bitch! Are you in there? Let's go!" screamed Denise, pounding on the door.
The door opened and Carman stood ready to go, holding a pair of ice skates too.
"Come on in, just let me get my coat." Carman said.
Denise rolled her eyes, but went inside anyway.
"So...anorexic bitch, are you ready to skate or what?" Denise asked as Carman pulled her purple fuzzy jacket.
"I guess...I haven't skated in so long, I don't even know if I remember how." Carman said.
"I'm sure you'll get the hang of it again," Denise said, "Now come on!" She grabbed Carman by the arm and they ran together towards Stark's Pond.
"Why are we running so fast? You don't want to skate that bad do you?" Carman called as Denise tugged her along.
Denise laughed, "No you dumb ass!"
"Oh you wanna see jew boy right?" Carman realised.
"Exactly." Denise answered as they climbed over the hill that overlooked Stark's Pond. The pond looked beautiful as it glistened under a pack of ice. Cartman, Kyle, Kenny, Stan, Wendy, and Butters were all sitting nearby a log. Denise and Carman ran over to them.
"Look who's here." said Kyle.
"Yeah-"Denise smiled.
"No, I mean look who's here!" Kyle said again, pointing behind him. Denise turned and to her luck, Fran was right behind her.
"You bitch!" scowled Denise.
"What is she doing here?" Stan asked.
"She must have followed us." shrugged Denise.
Fran took a stick and started wacking Denise on the butt with it. Cartman started laughing histeracly.
"Are we skating or what?" demanded Wendy.
"What are you doing here?" Denise asked, trying to grab the stick from Fran's clutches.
"I came here with Stan," answered Wendy, "We're going out."
Denise smiled, braking the stick in two and pushing Fran into a snow bank nearby, "Yeah Stan's cute...but not as cute as Kyle."
Kyle blushed and Cartman laughed, "The Jew's blushing!"
"SHUT UP Cartman!" Kyle cried, still blushing at Denise.
"Shall we skate then?" Denise took Kyle's mittened hand in hers and they slid out onto the ice.
"Come on Stan." Wendy announced and pulled Stan onto the ice with her.
Carman turned to Cartman, "I haven't ice skated in a long time..." she said nervously.
"It's not that hard, if a Jew can do it, than so can you." Cartman said.
Carman smiled, "Eric, you're funny."
Cartman smiled too, "I am? No one's ever said that one before."
"Hey dumb asses! Let's get out here, huh?" Denise called from the ice, skating alongside with Kyle.
"Well we should go...and uh skate then." said Carman, glancing over at Cartman nervously.
"Sure..." Carman said hesitantly then he glanced over at Carman who was slowly (yet wobbily) moving her way onto the ice unsteadily in her skates.
"Do you knew help?" Cartman asked.
"Please!" yelled Carman, just as she said that she fell forwards, but was caught by Cartman.
She looked up at him, clutching to his round middle.
"Thank you." she said.
"Oh...sure...yeah." Cartman answered. He looked down at her, but right then he wished he hadn't. Carman was looking up at him, her bright big eyes shining, her face was turning a bit red from the Colorado cold.
Cartman helped her to her feet, but they were still clutching hands. Denise skated past them perfectly, then she started skating backwards.
"Hey everybody look at me!" she cried.
"Show off." muttered Wendy to Stan.
"Awesome!" cried Kyle, who was standing by himself now watching her in awe.
"Hey Kenny! Butters! Are you guys going to skate with us?" Kyle called. Kenny was sitting on the ground by a log and Butters was next to him.
"All right fellas, I suppose so." Butters answered, "Come on Kenny."
"Okay." said Kenny and he and Butters joined everybody else on the ice. The afternoon flew by and none of the kids really knew it, they were having so much fun. Fran even joined them out on the ice, trying to out skate Denise and getting in her way.
"Hey fat ass! I'm surprised you don't fall through the ice!" teased Wendy.
"Ay! I'm not fat I'm just big boned!" Cartman screamed back, then he turned to Carman and asked, "Am I fat?"
Carman giggled and playfully poked him in the stomach, "I think you're cute," she said, "Hey try and catch me!"
Carman started skating faster and it took Cartman loads of painful effort to chase after her, but he was having fun, and for once not complaining about anything.
"Isn't this fun Kenny?" Butters asked, looking over at Kenny.
"Sure why not?" was Kenny's reply, he didn't really enjoy being addressed by Butters.
"Hey wanna see what I can do?" Butters asked, but before Kenny could even reply, Butters was off skating around, he did a triple axle and twirled, and suddenly, his ice skate flew right off of him!
Everyone watched in horror as the ice skate sailed threw the air and landed in Kenny's face. He fell onto the ice in a splatter of blood, with the ice skate still impaled into his face.
"Oh my god! He killed Kenny!" screamed Kyle in horror.
"You bastard!" cried Stan, pointing at Butters.
Butters covered his face in his hand, "Goddamnit! Not AGAIN!!" he screamed.
Denise, Wendy, Fran, and Carman just looked at each other in horror.
"We gotta help him!" cried Denise.
"He's too poor to have a funeral." sighed Cartman.
"I have finally seen death..." said Carman softly.
Cartman put his hand on her shoulder for comfort.
"Poor kid...there's no help for him now." Wendy said.
"I can't stand it any longer!!" screamed Butters, and he ran off.
"What are we going to do?!" screamed Denise, biting her nails nervously.
"What...we always do?" said Kyle looking confused.
Denise, Carman, and Fran stared at Kyle like he was crazy.
"What do you mean...like you always do?" asked Denise.
Kyle looked down at his feet.
Stan shrugged.
Cartman laughed.
Wendy stared blankly into space.
Kenny bled.
After a few more moments of akward silence, Carman held up her hand excitedly.
"Let's hold a funeral for him!"Carman cried.
Read on into Chapter 3 for what happens when Kenny actually has a funeral!! Hope you liked it!!