The Department of Mysteries – Part Three of Five

Rating/Warnings: PG, Fifth Book Spoilers, Plot Changes, Yaoi

A/N: The third part of mini series, so I suggest that you read the other two before reading this. Enjoy.

"What do you want, Sirius?"

"I want you to stop asking me that."

"What else?"

"...A sandwich."

"You aren't hungry."

"But I should be."

Remus sighed, rubbing his eyes with one hand. Sirius had grown grumpy over the stretch of unrecorded time, now regarding the handsome shade with narrowed eyes. "What do you want, Sirius?"

Sirius crossed his arms. "You. We went over this."

"What else?" Remus asked again.

"I. Don't. KNOW." Sirius cried, throwing up his arms. "Freedom, maybe? A blanket? To get out of here, even?" He glowered at Remus. "I don't know – I want a lot of things!"

"Is forgiveness on that list?" Remus wanted to know.

"Forgiveness?" Sirius said stonily. "For what?"

"James...Harry...Peter..."

"I do not want forgiveness for what happened with Peter." Sirius said sharply. "I hate him. I would kill him for what he did to James and Lily."

Remus was playing with an eagle feather quill that he had pulled from nowhere. "Hate is destructive."

"And love is healing. So the wheel turns."

Remus fluttered the quill in one hand as if writing. "You want forgiveness for how that situation turned out, Sirius – switching Secret Keepers and leading to James and Lily's death. Hence – James' forgiveness."

"And not Lily's?"

Remus's direct gaze pinned Sirius once more. "Be honest, with yourself. You only valued Lily's opinion when James asked you to. You like her well enough, but, for you, she was only an accessory to the James Potter collection."

"That's a harsh way to put it." Sirius muttered. "I like Lily."

Remus nodded. "Yes, but you loved James and you loved Remus. They were the two most important people in the world to you. It was the same with Peter. You only liked him. He was only another addition."

Sirius twisted his spine, creating a loud cracking sound. "You have quite the way with words." He observed.

"Don't flatter yourself." Remus said sternly. "You want James' forgiveness, which leads to Harry's."

"For not being the Godfather and guardian I was supposed to be."

"You're catching on..." The shade said. "And Remus' forgiveness?"

Sirius didn't say anything.

"Fine." Remus said. "I'll say it."

"I don't want to hear it." Sirius said, his voice cracking.

"Of course not," the other said brutally. "You don't want to think about how you hurt him deeply. How you promised to live with and love him forever—"

"I still love him." Sirius said quietly. "I've never stopped loving him."

"But are you still with him?" Remus pointed out.

Sirius' anger flared. "It's hardly in my control!"

Remus, instead of backing off, was suddenly excited. "Yes. Exactly." He leaned close to Sirius' face, grinning. "That's the whole point of this!" With a touch that was as soft as a gentle wind, Remus kissed him. He didn't pass through Sirius. Then the shade vanished.

Sirius blinked, uncertain and alone. "Remus?"

The artificial marauder didn't return.