The Department of Mysteries – Part Four of Five

Rating/Warnings: PG, Fifth Book Spoilers, Plot Changes, Yaoi

A/N: The fourth part of mini series, I hope that you know by now to read the other parts. Enjoy!

He floated for a long while, utterly alone once more in the dark embrace of the veil. Try as he might, he couldn't recall the specter that looked like Remus. He couldn't do anything but sink there, watching his past drift past him, tainting him with their depressing darkness. Azkaban... It was a long and dreadful blur, calling up images he vaguely recalled. The icy cold of Dementors, screams and mad ramblings...the day that Bellatrix and her husband were brought in...so many moons of cowering painfully under the single cot... So many horrible smears of memory.

Sirius found himself falling gently into scenery, feet touching down on the scorched ruins of where Godric's Hallow once stood. The area was different. It was...healing somehow. This wasn't a memory. He hadn't ever been back to the Hallow since that day...he simply didn't have the chance.

James materialized at his side; hair sticking in all directions, but remaining out of his line of sight. "Not quite what you expected is it?"

"I've never seen this." Sirius said blandly.

"No, neither did I really." James pulled him by the arm onto the grounds. "After we saw Harry at the tournament, Lily and I came back here. Just to see, you know."

"You aren't real." Sirius said, stopping on a fresh patch of green grass.

James shook his head. "Oh, I'm very real, Mr. Black. Dead, but real."

Sirius didn't argue, but shoved his hands into his pockets. "Where are we, Prongs?"

"The ruins of the past, Padfoot."

"I meant-"

"I know." James said. "The veil's a mysterious circumstance, Padfoot. I think it's a separate dimension of sorts. Not the living world, but not the dead world either."

"How do I leave?" Sirius asked.

James shrugged. "I dunno."

Sirius sighed. "You're not being helpful, you know."

James kicked at a piece of old burnt brick. "Yeah, well, I'm dead."

Sirius's expression twisted for a moment. "I'm sorry, Prongs." He said.

"I know." The other replied.

Remembering what the phantom Remus had said, Sirius asked, "Can you forgive me?"

"No."

It stung, but Sirius had been preparing for it. "I...understand." His heart sank. Even Prongs couldn't forgive him. What chance did he have with-

"God, Padfoot!" James laughed, pushing him lightly. "Have you lost your sense of humor entirely?"

Sirius gawked at him, mouth hanging open. "You—? But..." James just laughed harder, holding his stomach. "I thought you were being serious!"

"Heh..." The former seeker wiped a tear from his eye. "I forgave you long ago, Sirius. It wasn't your fault, you know. There was nothing you could do. I know Peter betrayed us all."

"How did you know that it was Peter?"

James smiled at him wryly. "Living in Voldemort's wand does that to you."

Sirius looked at him, aghast. "You lived in—"

"It was quite the party, let me tell you..." James said this as if it was a joke, but his downcast gaze said otherwise. "Besides, we aren't anymore."

"...Are you happy, where you are?"

James nodded. "Most of the time. I miss you. And Moony. And my son." His gaze brightened suddenly. "Oh! And Quidditch! And cookies!" He had a dreamy look. "Cookies..."

Sirius shook his head with a smile. "Of everything, you say cookies. How can you possibly be hungry?"

"Aren't you?"

"No."

James suddenly pointed at him. "Lies, Padfoot. Stop lying to yourself."

Sirius threw his hands to the air. "I am not—"

James made a face. "I forgave you. Lily, being Lily, never even blamed you. Harry will too. But it will take a little work with Remus."

"Remus..." Sirius suddenly remembered something. "Remus said that there was a point to this-"

"When did you talk to Remus?" James asked curiously.

"Actually, I was hallucinating or something, but that's besides the point..." James gave him a weird look, and Sirius waved a hand at him. "He said that this was not in my control and that that was the point. What do you think?"

James scratched his head. "Well, maybe...Remus...is trying to say that you can't control everything – that if you let go of some stuff, it'll just happen as it's suppose to. You, know...let Fate take care of fate."

They stood there for a moment, not saying anything.

"That was very profound, Prongs."

James grinned. "That was, wasn't it?" They laughed for a while, looking around at the lighted scenery. "It was good to see you, Padfoot." James said with a smile.

Sirius hugged him, smiling. "You too, Prongs."

"Go home, Sirius."

And Sirius abruptly felt like he was rising very fast, and James and the Hallow disappeared. He blinked and finally fell asleep.