Prologue: The Lists

Mission Codename: Cinnamon Lips

Operational Team:

Alix Wilmot

AKA: Sylvan Alexandrite

Mission Operator

Potterverse: Draco Malfoy, Fred Weasley,

LOTRV: Frodo Bagins, Peregrin Took, Faramir,

Slayersverse: Zelgadis

Sailor Moonverse: Haruka

Heathersverse: N/A

Cristin Barr

AKA: Elladora Pinkstone

Mission Decoy and Pyrotechnics Specialist

Potterverse: Draco Malfoy, Gilderoy Lockhart

LOTRV: Gandalf,

DBZV: Vegeta

Sailor Moonverse: Tigers Eye

Heathersverse: N/A

Laurel Turner

AKA: Pax McNamara

Mission Leader/ Planner

Potterverse: Oliver Wood

LOTRV: Legolas, Peregrin Took

DBZV: Trunks, Gohan,

Sailor Moonverse: Helios

Heathersverse: JD

Part One: Potterverse

Draco Malfoy was not having a good day.

First, his utterly useless house elf had woken him up late. Then the limo wouldn't start. So, to his increasing chagrin, he was forced to arrive at Kings Cross in – horror of all horrors- a Rolls Royce! And then! Because of his late arrival, no compartments were left free, so he was forced to sit across from the self-absorbed pretty boy Gryffindor Quidditch captain Oliver Wood.

So when a brunette girl about his age fell out of the ceiling of his compartment onto his lap, he was less than amused. He did, however, derive some small pleasure from the fact that the very same thing had happened to Wood. The only differences being Wood's was strawberry blond, and screamed, "Oliver Wood!" upon seeing whom she had landed on.

Laurel couldn't believe her luck. Landing on one of her targets upon entry. How cool was that? Looking across she saw that Alix had also landed on one of her targets. Draco, the little snake. Oh boy, She thought, Cristin's not going to like this. Wait. Where is the little carrot top? Maybe She landed in the next compartment. She dully noted that Alix was currently frenching Malfoy, and he was actually enjoying it. Hmmm, learn by example. But after seeing the look of complete shock and worry on Oliver's face, decided, Gotta earn it

Finally Alix came up for air, but before Malfoy could mutter a stuttered, "Who-", She was back down again.

It was Oliver who asked the inevitable question "Who are you?" Which meant she had to come up with a response.

She smiled as sweet as possible and said "I'm Pax McNamara. How are you, Oliver?"

"I'd be great if you tell how you got here and why you know my name?"

Uh oh. She was in a situation now. How to explain this?

"Well, I don't know how I got here but I do know why. Sorry, I can't tell you. Strictly confidential. But you wanna know how I know your name?"

"Sure."

Alix had actually taken the time to toss her the bag of books. This was a first for her. Most impressive. Laurel reached in, dug out the copy of The Philosopher's Stone, flipped to one the many book marked pages, and handed it to Oliver. There in the margins, in her messy printing were the words "first appearance of Oliver Wood, a historic moment."

Oliver had been a little shocked when she landed on his lap. But now… Not blonde, but good enough.

"Hey!" said the brunette. "You hurt Pax, I rip out your left lung and use it for a piñata." She turned back to the blonde. "Now, that wasn't so terrible, was it?" she said with a smirk that rivaled his own.

"And what might be the name of my soon to be lover?"

Her smirk faded abruptly. "Assumptions, assumptions. Don't get me wrong; you're a great kisser. But, shall we say, my heart resides with another?" She licked his cheek. "We've gotta do this again sometime." At this point, the sexual tension became too much to deal with, and he passed out.

Laurel laughed. "I think you broke him, Alix." She turned back to Oliver. "Ollie, this is Sylvan Alexandrite, or Alix for short. She is a highly evil and perverse human being and one of my best friends." Alix had been staring for several seconds at Wood. She snapped her eyes back to Laurel. "I've changed my mind." She said. "You've got no competition here."

"Good," Laurel smiled. "I owe you a Coke."

"What?" said Oliver, thoroughly lost by this point.

"Hey, we're slowing down." Alix looked triumphantly at Laurel. "See? Told ya it'd be faster to go through the roof of the train 'stead get on at the station."

"In case you haven't noticed, we're missing someone!"

Alix frowned. "That's odd."

Laurel sighed. "Have you no sense of moral decency?"

"Decency? What is this decency of which you speak?"

She sighed again. " I am so glad I gave up on that argument about the socio-physical implications of telling them about themselves. Anyway, we should get off the train and look for her. I mean, she could be anywhere. And you know Ellie. She cannot be allowed to meet people without supervision."

*******

Severus Snape was not having a good day.

First of all, this was the day the students came back from the summer holidays. Never a good thing. But this one was worse. His foul mood had nothing to do with the fact that later in the day a student he particularly despised would not be expelled for damaging a very important and historic willow tree. Had he known about it in advance, he would have been most assuredly furious, but not quite as petulant as he was at the moment. An unidentified falling redhead (UFR) had dropped out of nothingness right into his lap. That in and of itself may not have been that bad except, she babbled. Incessantly. Things like " Where are they? Why am I by myself? GRRR. Go through the train she said. It would be simple she said. Even you can do it she said. But check it out! I'm sitting on the lap of…" She looked up slowly, and saw him for the first time "Professor…Snape." And then she let out this horrible wail. Well, then the worst happened. She fainted, still on his lap.

First thing, remove her. Secondly, sterilize clothes.

******

"Soooo." Lockhart said, leaning over Dumbledore's desk. "You think you're so smart ay?"

"Soooo, you think you're Canadian, eh?" replied Laurel, her voice dripping with sarcasm. She turned to look at Alix, who was fiddling with a letter opener and staring at Lockhart's facial area. " Gimme that!" she hissed, " No killing the targets, it's not allowed."

" What's not allowed?" asked Lockhart.

"Killing the targets," Alix said, leaning back in her chair and pulling out a piece of mint gum. She popped it in her mouth and chewed slowly, watching Lockhart's reaction closely. There was, for example, this thing that his eyeballs did, where they bulged in and out. Then there was the more than satisfactory twitching in the area of his lower lip. These things and more made him age several years. Alix never got more satisfaction than she did when watching pain of her own design.

"T-target f-f-for wh-what?" he stuttered.

"Fandom!" Alix said suddenly.

"Oh, yeah, duh!" Laurel said. "We 'broke' in so-" she winked at Alix. "-Our dear friend Ellie could meet you!"

"She's you hugest fan!" Alix said for emphasis.

At that exact moment Dumbledore and Snape walked in, Snape carrying the unconscious form of Cristin, her red pigtails swinging in the breeze.

"See?" said Alix, gesturing towards her with a hand. "She swooned just thinking about you!"

"Actually," Snape began. The thought died when he saw Alix's deadened stare and slow shake of the head in his direction. He thought quickly, wondering what the brunette could possibly be playing at.

"She fell out of the ceiling and onto a table, and when I tried to talk with her, she shrieked and said, "Save me, Mr. Lockhart." The brunette winked at him. He hated it when they did that.

"The killer bunnies are coming!" Cristin said as she jerked awake. "Oh…" She saw she had something of an audience. "Hi everybody!" she waved. Then she noticed who was carrying her. And then she screamed. "Put me down!" She bit his arm. He dropped her soon enough. She ran round to hide behind Alix, which was noticeably difficult, considering that Alix was a few inches shorter than her. She started to cry.

"Oh, Ellie, what's the matter?" Alix asked.

"He gave me The Look!" she wailed.

"What look? Men can't do The Look! It's a female trait!" Alix looked at Snape suspiciously.

"This look." Cristin's eyes narrowed to thin lines, her lips stiffening. Her hair, as if by her own will, started to wilt, and drag closer to her face, which was considerably paler than usual. Alix grabbed her drooping pigtails.

"Ellie," she said sternly. "Evil doesn't suit you. Don't do that again."

"O-kay!" Cristin said perkily, completely back to normal.

Snape scowled. Meanwhile, Dumbledore appeared to be holding in a great fit of laughter. "Severus," he said. "I believe you have a Forgetfulness Potion to brew." He turned to Lockhart. "And, I believe you have a class to prepare, Gilderoy." Snape stalked out, robes flowing out behind him. Alix giggled; she loved the billow-y coat vibe it gave off. Lockhart either hadn't heard him or wanted to ignore him. Either way he was currently obsessing over his fan "You'll want an autograph of course. And picture. I can sign that too if you like. OH! You wait right here and I will be right back with every thing!" And with that he left the office swearing to return with objects for Fandom. As soon as he left, Dumbledore slammed, locked and pushed a desk up against the door. "Now, why are you really here?" he asked, smiling. "It is most unlikely you have come here merely to obtain Gilderoy paraphernalia."

"We're from the Canadian Ministry of Magic," Laurel said, handing him a letter, which was indistinguishable from a genuine article. Ah, the joys of Alix's Perfectype computer program.

"We're here to study your teaching methods," Alix said in her, "I was a stockbroker at age 4" voice.

"And QUIDDITCH!!!!!!!" Cristin yelled, jumping up and down.

"Aren't you a little young to be doing this?" he asked.

"There was this huge muggle fiasco. We're not even allowed to talk about it, really. Anyway, the short version is that everybody at the office is tied up, so-"

"Daddy sent us!" Cristin cut her off.

"Hmmm… Well, I suppose you can stay in different houses for the duration of your stay." He turned to Cristin "Your Grandmother wouldn't happen to be Carlotta Pinkstone?"

"As a matter of fact she is!" The redhead stated proudly.

"Oh dear. Perhaps splitting you up is not the best idea."

Alix shook her head. "Totally not. She should be with at least one of us at all times."

At this moment, Snape decided to barge in, reducing the Louis XIV antique writing desk shoved against the door to splinters. "Headmaster!" he snarled. "Potter and Weasley have arrived. In the flying Ford Anglia that was in the Daily Prophet today!"

"Really?" Dumbledore asked mildly.

"How interesting." Alix said in almost the exact same tone of voice.

"Well, it appears I have to go deal with the newly arisen situation." Dumbledore stood up. "If you would be so good as to make your way to the Great hall I will take my leave of you."

"Where are we supposed to stay? Is there some sort of tower we can live in?" asked Cristin

" Well I was thinking more along the lines of Gryffindor tower-"

"Yipeeeeeee" broke out all three.

*****

Alix: I like this chapter the best so far!

Laurel: Only 'cause you kiss Draco.

Cristin: YOU KISSED DRACO??? *Laurel holds her back as she tries to kill Alix*

An: Ok, I wrote this with Alix and Laurel and Laurel wanted me to put it onto Fanfiction.net so here it is. Great beginning eh? I didn't really write a lot in this part seeing as I was in this chapter very little. I did help out here and there like Draco's line "And what might be the name of my soon to be lover?" That's mine! And some other little things. You're probably confused about a couple things but they're all be explained later on in the story.

PLEASE Review! And look at my other stories and review!

Pucker up is a series of stories which still need to be written. This series is written by 3 people, Laurel, Alix and Myself. So, you can't give me all the credit tho I'd love feedback.