Author's Note: Emotional chapter. Eek.
I saw 'Mean Girls' a couple days ago…It's amazing how much like it's High school…kinda scary actually.
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"Liking your old friend?"
Brenda looked up from her food, into Phillip's dark brown eyes, "Excuse me?"
"Your friend…the woman?"
"Oh! Right…" she sighed. Was it her imagination or was this food upsetting her stomach. Whoever thought a pirate who can handle a storm perfectly on a ship can't handle rum…and Spanish food. She sighed again, I have a strange stomach. "She's everything that I remember…"
Brenda hadn't really talked to Phillip since she got here. She hadn't really looked at him either. The reason was because she didn't want to be there in the first place. She didn't want to be in this man's quarters and in Spain. She wanted to be at home, preferably sitting on the couch with green tea talking with her mother.
But like she had said before, this place couldn't compare to home.
"She likes her room, no?"
Brenda paused, looking up, "She doesn't stay in my room?"
"Goodness no! She stays in the maids quarters…"
Brenda bit her lip, "Uh…I didn't know that…but could we possibly make an exception? She only knows two languages and neither of those languages your maids speak. Would it be possible if she just stayed in my room?"
Phillip paused, "If that's what she wants, then I'm sure that'll be okay."
Brenda nodded, "That's what she wants. Thank you."
"Anything for you, darling."
Brenda blushed and looked down at her food. Yes, she definitely didn't want to be here.
"How's Will?"
Elizabeth shrugged. She and Gwyneth were currently riding Pearl leisurely around his run, both in pants and light shirts. Elizabeth had mused earlier that if she were caught like this in Port Royal, the whole family would surely be thrown off of the island. Gwyneth laughed, saying Cape Clear was so much more…relaxing.
"He's complaining about his eye hurting." Elizabeth went on, "Should they really be left alone together?"
Gwyneth smiled, "They're with Matthew and helping fix the Pearl- I'm sure they're be safe."
There was a long pause before Elizabeth said, "Do you ever think about Nathan?"
Random wouldn't even begin to describe the word Gwyneth first thought of. Nathan? She hadn't thought about him…in ages! Why would Elizabeth be thinking of such a thing? This was the time when Gwyneth was glad she was behind the other woman, because right now she would've not liked Elizabeth to see what kind of face she was making. Nathan hadn't been mentioned in over fifteen years, why would she bring it up now?
"Why would you ask such a thing, dear?"
Elizabeth shrugged, "I've been thinking about both my brother and father lately. I know you're happily married- but don't you ever wonder?"
"No!" Gwyneth answered too quickly.
"I'm sorry…just forget I ever mentioned it." Unfortunately, Gwyneth never forgot things easily.
"You're still here?" Brenda moaned as she entered the room, seeing Trevor on one of the couches, reading. He rolled his eyes and didn't move.
"How was the dinner?" he asked.
She growled, "None of your business."
"That good?"
"What do you mean 'that good?' Couldn't you tell by my response how bloody good it was?"
"In fact…I can."
She rolled her eyes as she made her way to the sink, splashing cold water on her face, "Then please tell me about it."
"You didn't want to be there. But as the evening progressed, you and the King had conversations…and you liked it. And judging by your tone of voice…you're actually starting to like the chap- but you're not happy about that fact."
She dried her face off and threw the towel at his head, "How dare you get into my head!" She said, half kidding, half not. It was strange how he could get into her thoughts. Of course he had always been able to do that- she never figured out how.
She sat on her bed and started taking off the slippers she had been wearing all day. She would never admit it- but they were pretty comfortable. She might have to 'borrow' a pair before she left. If she ever left, that is. She was starting to lose hope. She had been meaning to ask Phillip when the wedding date was, but never did. Whenever she was about to, he brought up another topic.
She absentmindedly started taking off her clothes. She paused and looked at Trevor. He had his eyes on his book. "Keep yer eyes there devil boy."
His eyes slowly raised and Brenda stomped her foot. He quickly found out why. "It's bad enough you have to stay in this bloody room! Now give me my privacy!"
He nodded, agreeing that was the one thing she needed. And most likely the one thing she had left. Maybe dignity, but in the getup she was dressed in today- Trevor was sure that all dignity had been stripped from her.
Brenda took off her shirt, with her back facing him and then paused again, feeling Trevor's eyes on her, she turned her head, seeing him staring at her back. Most likely at my tattoo. She thought. "Stop it!" she yelled.
He looked up and quickly looked away, mentally slapping himself for being so…attracted to her. This was going to be harder than he thought.
"What are you doing here?"
"I had to come see you."
Gwyneth clutched her robe, "Couldn't you do it at a more suitable hour?"
"I had to tell you…I love you…marry me."
Gwyneth sat up with a gasp and grabbed her forehead. What a nightmare. She thought to herself. She looked around, not seeing anyone in her bed with her. Then she remembered Jack had gone to take the Pearl out. It had finally been repaired and Jack gathered up the least amount of crew members he needed and left- saying he would be home in a fortnight.
For once, Gwyneth was glad her husband wasn't there. The dream she had just had was not about the man she'd been sharing a bed with for five years- it was about Nathan Swann. Now, with cold sweat running down her spine, she realized just what kind of effect Elizabeth's comment had made. This was the second dream she had had in the past week. Jack would be home soon enough and Gwyneth would need to either keep this from him, ignore it herself or talk to him about it.
The latter she knew she wouldn't do.
Captain Jack Sparrow wasn't exactly a man who would enjoy hearing that his wife was having dreams about some other man.
But Nathan is dead.
Yes, but the memory is still there.
Jack is easily jealous as well. She sighed. This was getting her no where. She got up out of bed, making Suzie pick up her head from the bed, where Jack usually slept and then go back to sleep. Gwyneth started to pace, thinking about her options. She had over-ruled telling him.
So the only option is to ignore it.
Because there's no feelings you have for him still.
Nathan is dead and has been for more than fifteen years- I shouldn't be having these dreams about him.
Have you completely gotten over him?
Gwyneth paused, completely gotten over Nathan? That voice inside her head was beginning to sound like Elizabeth. She sighed and shook her head, "I love Jack." She said out loud, as if saying out loud would break some sort of curse she had over her. "Jack helped me get over Nathan! He's the reason I…forgot Nathan." She frowned, forget? Had she really forgotten him?
She shook her head again, it didn't matter. All that mattered was that she was married to Jack and loved him. They had created a home together and a family and a life. What else could she ask for? She sighed and sat down at the foot of her bed and put her hand on her stomach.
That's another thing. I can't be thinking of Nathan when I think I'm with child. Gwyneth sighed, all in all- this was not good.
Brenda sighed happily and rolled over on her side. She lazily opened her eyes and smiled at the man at her side. "Mornin' Love." He said to her. She smiled wider and said softly, "I love you." He gently kissed her lips and wrapped his arms around her. She did the same and pressed her ear against her chest- hearing his heart beat gave her comfort.
She lightly brushed her fingers over his bare chest. She paused. Bare? She looked down at herself, she too was also bare-chested. She gasped slightly and looked around. Then something shiny caught her eye- a ring. She looked on her left hand and her eyes widened as she saw a thin, plain silver band with a little, round, topaz jewel laid in it- around her ring finger.
Brenda looked up quickly, remembering the man she was with- the man had blond hair and blue eyes. The man was Trevor.
Brenda jolted out of bed with a gasp and then quickly hit the floor. Hard. She moaned and looked around. Trevor was asleep in the chair with his hood over most of his face. She sighed- relieved he hadn't seen or heard such a thing.
"You need ice?" she heard.
She growled and grabbed a pillow from her bed and chucked it at him. "Back off Devil boy."
"That fall must've not been pleasant…I was just taking care of you."
"I don't need takin' care of! I already told you that." She said, climbing back onto her bed. She was obviously too close to the side than she had usually been. She sighed and rolled over.
"Bad dream?" he asked after a minute.
"None of yer business."
"What's you're problem?" he asked, started to get cranky as well.
Brenda sighed, "You are."
He smirked and hoped she didn't see it, "You were dreaming about me?"
"I didn't say that."
He muttered something incomprehensible and Brenda let it go. The last thing she needed was to loose any more sleep over Trevor. The past dreams she had had were of being on the Pearl or being at home with Gwen and her father- not of Trevor.
The fact that she was in a bed with him and they were both bare-chested bothered her greatly. Setting aside the fact that she was wearing a wedding band on her finger. She wasn't even going to think about that right now. She sighed and punched her pillow, not able to find it comfortable.
"Need a pillow-fluffer?"
"Shut up Johnson- I'm tryin' to sleep here." She rolled her eyes. She wasn't sure how long she would be able to keep this up. She was either going to kill him or she was going to tell the king to do so.
Brenda wasn't the only one having a rough night. Trevor was usually a good sleeper. Not light but not hard either. He just needed one thing to fall asleep- total and complete silence.
The room he was in now was anything but silent.
After Brenda had fallen out of her bed, she sounded like she was trying to man the Pearl by herself by how much noise she was making in her bed- but when in fact she was only tossing and turning in the sheets. Dear Lord she must be having a nightmare, Trevor thought as he forced to keep his eyes closed. The word that was mumbled from her mouth gave him a reason to think otherwise.
"Trevor…" Brenda called quietly. In a second his eyes were open and staring at her. She looked like she was dead- with one arm flopping over the side of the bed on her stomach, her wild black hair was covering half her face and her leg was bent at the knee- suspended in mid-air. Trevor waited for any indication that she had called his name for a reason, but nothing came. He grunted and closed his eyes again.
Wait…what? His eyes popped open again and shifted to Brenda. She had called him name, but was sleeping. She was tossing and turning in her bed, acting as though she was being killed…and called out his name. She's bloody dreaming about me! He thought to himself- and the reaction he had was nothing that he wanted to have.
Remember Katrina. Trevor reminded himself when a slight smile started making it's way to his face. Quickly thinking about Katrina and memories filled with her presence, he closed his eyes again, content with her image in his mind.
Of course it wasn't very long until Brenda's actions floated into his head again. Why would she be dreaming about me? He sighed, not wanting to go into the complex info structure of a woman's mind. I'll never get any sleep unless I know. He opened one eye, looking at Brenda, weighing the options of waking her up. Those thoughts were quickly remedied when he remembered how much of a morning person she was. And once he remembered- he shuddered and was determined never to wake her- whether it be on accident or on purpose.
The reason for her dream would have to wait until tomorrow.
A knock on her door early the next morning told her that someone was here- who she didn't really care. She knew it wasn't Trevor. But when her servant announced the visitor Katrina looked up from her sampler and smiled politely, "Hello Captain Robinson, what can I do for you today?" She got up and walked to him. The young captain looked nervous as he turned his hat around in his hands. His brown wig looked like it hadn't been brushed in two weeks and his green eyes darted around the room.
"I was wondering if you could do something for me."
She paused, raising an eyebrow. She had heard rumors for her friends that he had had a growing affection towards her, never in her life would she think it was true. It wasn't proper! She was engaged. "What would that be Captain?"
He rubbed the back of his neck, "Would you accompany me to the ball tomorrow night?"
Katrina shifted her weight to her other foot, her father had mentioned this ball. It included dinner and dancing- two of the many she loved to do with Trevor. Who's off rescuing Brenda… She sighed. Now she wished she hadn't forced him to go. She wanted to go with him, not with Captain Robinson.
Though it was the social event of the year and Katrina would love to go- her heart wasn't necessarily in it this time. She wanted Captain Johnson at her side. But when she looked into James Robinson's green eyes, she knew it was a mistake. "Yes." She nodded and immediately wished she didn't have a weak spot for green eyes.
Jack wasn't really sure which was worse. Him losing sleep over his daughter being lost, or Gwyneth. Each had it's equal parts of bitterness. The taste that Jack knew very well- but Gwen…she didn't. Jack knew the bitter taste that entered not only his mouth, but his entire being when something important was taken from him. The bitterness often mixed with anger or fear or hurt. When Barbossa took his ship, that was anger and bitterness. When Beverly left him so long ago, that was hurt and bitterness. Now, when Brenda had been kidnapped, it was fear and bitterness.
The familiar bitterness had entered his heart and his spirit once he and his love had found out what had happened to Brenda. Clouded by it- he forgot to warn Gwyneth. To warn her of the side-effects and of the dangers. For she had never tasted this certain bitterness.
Side-effects of nightmares, sleepless nights and daydreams. Dangers of falling into the land of 'what if'. What if Brenda was dead? What if she never came home? Danger of falling in too deep into the land of 'what if' that you'd never return. Ever.
So as Jack watched his wife from the open door, he cursed himself for leaving her. For leaving Gwyneth here alone to deal with the dangers of losing a child. A child that wasn't completely hers but in a strong way- was. Had she neglected poor Matthew? Jack sighed. It wasn't her fault if she had. He should've stayed. He should've taken responsibility and he should've been the father and the husband that this house so desperately needed.
From her rocking chair Jack noticed something he hadn't before. Matthew was sleeping in her arms and Suzie was sleeping at her feet. How could he so easily look these two important things over? His mood lightened and he knew that no matter how depressed Gwen had been- she had kept these two things with her. Most likely to somehow make up for a third thing not being there. For not being at her side and for not being in her lap.
Jack turned his attention to the room. It was Brenda's. He should've known. The rocking chair that Jack and Trevor made for Gwyneth when she was pregnant with Matthew had been moved to Brenda's room. To be near to her. Jack thought. He would've done the same thing. He looked above the bed and saw the drawing Elizabeth had made years ago and that Jack had given to Brenda when they were both away from Gwyneth. He realized from that picture that Gwen and Brenda looked alike. Truly mother and daughter. He thought to himself.
But now was time to wake his beautiful wife and son. "Gwen love," he said lightly, touching her golden hair. She stirred slightly but didn't open her eyes. He kissed her ear and repeated himself. Finally she opened her eyes and looked at Jack. Seeing his dark brown eyes gave her instant comfort and warmed her from the inside out.
"Jack." She breathed. She kissed him and put all her emotion that she had been feeling for the past two weeks into that kiss. He kissed back, and equally gave her all his emotions. They pulled apart and looked at each other and smiled. "Get Matty an' follow me." he said quietly. She nodded and carried the still sleeping Matthew to their room. Suzie woke up and lazily followed the couple and then plopped down in front of the bed- not willing to give out enough energy to jump onto the bed.
Jack took off his boots, coat and hat and opened the covers and climbed in. Gwyneth laid the sleeping Matthew next to his father and he curled up next to him like instinct. Then Gwyneth took off her robe and slippers and climbed in next. She gave a great sigh and covered herself up. Jack lightly brushed his thumb over her cheek and said, "Sleep without worries t'night, love."
She smiled weakly, "I don't think I know how…" She grabbed his hand and kept it on her cheek while she closed her eyes, savoring her husband's rough but sweet touch. "I love you." she whispered.
"I love you." he whispered back. Something he rarely did, usually showing his love in actions. But tonight he had a feeling Gwyneth needed more than actions. It took those words to make her his years ago and tonight it would take those words to calm her weary spirit.
She smiled, her lips wavering, threatening to cry out. But she bit them to keep them under control. She met his gaze and nodded, to some how reassure him that she wouldn't cry and that she believed his words. He nodded back and said, "Happy t' have me home?"
She would've laughed if she wasn't feeling like crying. "Very." And with that, she closed her eyes, holding tightly to the hand that was on her cheek until she fell asleep.
The sun rose the next morning with Brenda still awake from the night before. The dream was haunting her and she spent most of her time either staring at the ceiling or staring at Trevor. And as much as she didn't want to admit it- she did the latter more often.
Is that why you two fell asleep together on the couch?
I never did that.
Jonathan and Mark's word stung her. She had remembered but in the past few years had tried to bury that memory as far as she could. Through the years she had tried over and over to forget Trevor's face, his touch, his voice- and had succeeded until he blasted her ship.
She turned and looked out her bay windows- determined to put her past behind her like she had for so many years. He was engaged. Of course, so was she.
Sighing, Brenda got up and forced herself to clean up. She got dressed quickly and was about to leave the room with Trevor threw a pillow at her bad. She turned on her heel and saw him putting a clean shirt on. She quickly looked at the floor, seeing his chest and remembering her dream.
"What was with you last night?"
"Do you not remember me sayin' it was none of yer business?"
"Look- I'm trying to help you here, so the least you can do is be civil to me."
Brenda rolled her eyes.
"Where are you going?"
"I don't have to tell you that!"
"Actually, you do." Trevor said and pointed to his cloak. She sneered.
"I want to go explore. If you want to come along then you'll have to do it quick and you'll have to not talk. 'Cause remember- you only know English and French."
He groaned slightly, put the cloak on and put the hood up and together they walked down the hall.
"Why do you want to leave anyways?"
"'Cause I'm goin' insane in that little room. I need to move around, be in different places! I need freedom. And this palace is anythin' but freedom."
Trevor frowned sarcastically, "Aw, I bit the Kingy won't be happy to hear you say that."
"He's not gunna know, Devil boy."
"That remains to be seen. And what's with you callin' me 'boy'. Do I look like a boy to you?"
She stopped walking and turned to look at him. Trevor rolled his eyes, knowing it was a mistake to ask. But before he could tell her to forget the question- she said, "You look the same since the day I met you."
"I highly doubt that. I was seventeen when you met me. Now I'm twenty one. A lot of things have changed."
Before she could respond she started walking again, but before she took one step the floor opened up beneath her and practically swallowed her up. Trevor watched in amazement as she was gone in three seconds. He paused and then ran forward, hoping the floor would swallow him up as well. And before he knew it, he was surrounded by darkness.
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Author Thanks:
Dawnie-7: Um…Chocolat…yes. Good food, good movie.
ThePinkPanther: I know! He's like the outcast in every movie he plays! Eddie Scissorhands! If you like Brenda's "Go Trevor, Stay Trevor" it'll get much better soon.
PiratePrincess91: The "love" between Trevor and Brenda will…come at a later. Around chapter twelve…but there will be progression with it before then.
Piper8188: Yea…I tried to think if that could really work with the Ana looking at Trevor thing…But then I remembered it was my story. Heh. You like Will and Liz, don't you?
Emma436: Jeez, no wasting time this time, eh? Take up the whole page! YESH! Lol. You're awesome. Okay- the name thing…I can explain! I was looking up French names online and there's like NONE! The others were Toni and Triage…well the ones I liked at least. So I thought, what the heck? It's my story anyhow. shrugs Yea- with Jack and the bar fight…I got inspired by Star Trek…(I'm a Trekkie) and I thought it'd be an interesting thing to see…Jack in a bar fight. Seems to make sense! He just needs to get prodded enough, you know? I might just use you're 'engaged' idea…is that okay?