Author's Note: I got this done in two days. That's amazing. Um…this chapter mostly circulates around Gwyneth and Jack … has some of Trevor and Brenda towards the end- but I needed it to end it like I did for Brenda and Trevor because the next chapter it's going to be…crazy. And that's why I put so much Gwen and Jack in this one- I couldn't put anything more in between each little…"scene", so yea. Hope you like it.
Also, I'm trying new things with separating my "scenes"…so bear with me. The thing that's going to separate them are capital 'X's…so yea…let's pray this works.
"Mommy?"
A quiet voice slowly entered Gwyneth's subconscious.
"Mommy?"
Then slowly feeling came to her skin and she felt little hands on her arm, moving her slightly.
"Mommy?"
Gwyneth calmly woke from the previous night's nightmare and opened her eyes to see her son's face. She pushed back his dark hair from his face. He had a look of urgency and did let up from shaking her, "What is it, sweetie?"
"Where's daddy?"
Gwyneth frowned and turned her head, seeing the spot next to her empty. Empty? She rubbed her face with her free hand and blinked. Was it hot in here? She looked back at her son and smiled weakly, "He wasn't up when you got up?"
"I been up for a long time…when I went to the kitchen…I saw breakfast already made for me, but no daddy."
Gwyneth swallowed, a pit forming in her stomach. "What else do you need sweetie?"
"Katrina is here to see you."
"Oh…oh!...uhm, what…"
"Can I go ride Pearl?"
"I'd rather be with you when you do that sweetie…"
"Can I brush him, then?"
She nodded and he almost got to the door when she said, "Take Suzie with you…and tell Katrina she can come up."
He nodded and dashed out. Gwyneth sighed and got out of bed slowly, but paused as her head started to spin when she sat up. Oh man… she thought to herself. She got up and undressed, feeling hot and then donned a silk robe Jack had given her a couple years ago. It was light, and that's what Gwyneth needed.
There was a quiet knock on the door as Gwyneth sank down into a chair. She looked up and smiled at Katrina. "Come in, please."
"I'm sorry…I didn't know you'd be sleeping in…but I needed to talk to you desperately."
Gwyneth waved her hand, "I honestly don't know what's wrong…besides the fact that my husband has disappeared." She stopped, looking at Katrina. She looked troubled. "Sit down dear, and tell me everything."
Katrina sighed and did as she was told. She took off her white gloves and hat and put them in her lap. "Is it infidelity if you have feelings for another person?
Yes.
"Who?"
Katrina dropped her head, "It seems so foolish! So…wrong." She shook her head, "James Robinson."
Gwyneth raised a brow and sat back, "A captain…"
She nodded and looked up, "Is it?"
Gwyneth swallowed, "Have you acted on these feelings?"
Katrina shook her head vigorously, "I can't risk it. Not with the engagement to Trevor! And I still have feelings for him as well… but I don't think I should be engaged if I have feelings for more than one man…and strong feelings at that."
Gwyneth sighed, "I agree."
"So I should break things off with Trevor?"
Gwyneth nodded, "I think that would be wise."
"But the thing is…people will talk!"
"Then let them talk…" Gwyneth said faintly, the room spinning again.
Katrina took a deep breath, "Father will be disappointed."
"He would be disappointed if you married Trevor when you knew there was someone else. You can't ignore this Katrina…trust your heart, trust your good judgment." It was barely a whisper, but it got the message across.
Katrina frowned, like she was expecting Gwyneth to disagree with her and put her into the right place. But she didn't. She agreed with her. Katrina looked up and saw that Gwyneth looked flushed, "Are you feeling alright?"
That should've been an easy question. That should've been easy to answer.
It wasn't.
"Jack?" Gwyneth whispered as she started to slide off the chair. Katrina gasped and caught her just before she hit the floor. "Matty!" Katrina yelled as she carried Gwyneth to the bed and pulled her up on the bed. She yelled for Matthew again and then pushed back some run away hairs on Gwyneth's forehead. "Just stay with me…" Katrina said.
"Jack…" Gwyneth said again, remembering when she was stabbed so many years ago and he had said the same thing.
"No, Gwyneth, it's me! Katrina."
Katrina? Do I know a Katrina? Gwyneth started breath hard, "Katrina?" she said frowning.
"Dear Lord…" Katrina said. She grabbed her skirts and dashed out of the room, heading for the stables. She needed Matty to get a doctor, to get Jack, to get someone, anyone. As soon as Katrina mentioned his mother and a doctor, Matthew was off in a flash. Katrina went back into the house, Suzie trailing behind her. She got a basin and got some water for it. Next she got a washrag and then slowly went up the stairs and into Gwyneth's room.
Gwyneth's eyes were closed and she looked like she was sweating. Katrina put the basin down, and went over to the other side of the bed and pulled Gwyneth towards her side where the basin was. "C'mon Gwyneth…don't leave me here…don't leave."
"Like your mother…" Gwyneth whispered.
Tears burned at Katrina's eyes, "Yes…like my mother." She started patting Gwyneth's brow with the wet rag and started talking to her, but what Gwyneth said didn't really make any sense. "Brenda? Don't shoot…my lock…my cat…dog." And when she did talk, she usually coughed along with it.
Ten minutes later Matthew returned with Caroline and a doctor. The man swiftly shooed everyone out and they were left in the hallway. "Where the blast is Jack?" Caroline hissed after mere seconds of being ushered out.
Katrina looked at Matthew who was buried in her shoulder and then looked at the older woman, "Matty mentioned him not being here when he woke up…let alone when Gwyneth woke up."
Caroline raised a brow, "And you haven't seen him?"
Katrina shook her head.
Caroline's eyes narrowed. "Stay here, I'll be back as soon as I can - and I'll be back with Jack."
She started walking down the stairs and Katrina called after her, "How do you know where he is?"
"He's Captain Jack Sparrow, is he not? There's only one place he is when he's not here."
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What the blast are you doing here? Talk it out with your wife. Go home.
Those words had been circulating through Jack's head since he got here. And instead of drinking the rum he had gotten, he'd only smashed the bottle in fierce anger.
Who the blast is Nathan!
Those words often drowned out the first set. The first set was his better judgment, his conscience, but right now all he was hearing was his anger. Maybe that's all he wanted to hear.
You love her.
Does she love me?
That's when the bitterness and despair started to set in. Jack had given his life for Gwyneth. No other woman had done to him what Gwyneth had. No woman had given him a reason to live for anything other than the sea, no other woman had given him a reason to trust and to love. Gwyneth had.
And now she betrays me.
You have no proof.
I have enough.
He shook his head, he didn't want to think about what he was. He wanted to think about the future, not the past.
Can there be a future without Gwyneth?
I'm going to find out.
Don't leave her…not now.
Why not?
Just before any battles could be broken out in Jack's head, the door swung open and Jack stiffened, expecting his wife, but seeing Caroline instead. Jack didn't drop his defense however. Caroline looked mad.
"What do you want?"
"For you t' get off yer lazy rear and get t' yer wife, you bloody idiot."
Jack blinked and stood up slowly, "How did you find me? Travis told you I was here?"
"No. I'm not the idiot in this room, Jack. You're always here."
Jack narrowed his eyes, "Why are you here?"
"Get back home! Your wife needs you!" Caroline said, pointing out the door.
"When she calls my name, I'll come home."
"I have it on good authority she's already done that. More than once." Caroline paused, "Why are you here, anyways?"
"No reason." Jack said, sitting back down and putting his feet on the table in front of him. Caroline slammed the door shut and walked up to the table, knocking off his feet, "You were thinkin' of runnin' out on Gwen, weren't you?"
"No."
"Liar."
"Pirate."
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! You haven't sincerely lied since you married Gwen!"
Jack sneered slightly and looked at her, "Was there a reason you dropped by."
"Tell me why you were going to leave."
Jack stood up, leaning on the table, "The name Nathan mean anything to you?"
Gwyneth paused, "Yes…that's…wait, why do you wanna know?"
"HA!" Jack said, pointing, "So she is being unfaithful! It's a secret, isn't it?"
Caroline stared at him for a minute and then shook her head slightly, keeping her eyes on him, "You're an idiot Jack. No, she's not cheating on you - but you of all people should know who Nathan is."
Jack narrowed his eyes, "You're not going to tell me?"
"She's not cheatin' on you, get over it! But I'm not going to tell you…no. You'll figure it out soon enough. Once you have a steady head on your shoulders."
"That could take awhile." He said sitting down.
Caroline sighed, leaning on the table, "Jack, go home."
With a sigh, he asked, "Why?"
"Gwyneth's ill."
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It didn't take long to get back home. Jack ran the whole way with Caroline running behind him. He had left the Black Pearl so quickly Caroline didn't know what had happened. At that moment, Caroline's word that Gwyneth wasn't being unfaithful was good enough for him. He missed her anyway and if she was ill, he wanted to be there.
He bounded up the stairs with Caroline right on his heels just as the doctor was coming out of his room. Jack and Caroline stopped, breathing hard, trying to catch their breath. Somehow Jack managed to get out, "What's…wrong…with…her…Mr. Robinson?"
Matthew ran to his father and Jack picked him up, feeling his bones creak. But the little boy buried his face in Jack neck as Katrina looked at the doctor, noticing that his son was James.
The old man shook his head, "Gwyneth told me about the baby…" he said quietly. Caroline and Katrina paused, "Baby?" they repeated. He nodded and Jack ignored them.
"Aye, I knew…how is she?"
"The mental confusion…the high temperature, the rash on her stomach and abdomen…coughing and from the feel of it, her spleen has enlarged…" he sighed, "She had Typhoid Fever."
Jack felt like the wind had be knocked out of him all over again. Typhoid Fever? "People…people die from that…right?"
The doctor sighed, looking around at the faces, hating to give bad news, "Which brings me to say sadly…the baby isn't…the body is sure to reject the baby. There's no sure way to tell until she…" He couldn't finish. Jack handed Matthew to Katrina right before he doubled over. For a minute he was silent and then he just slammed his fists on the floor and screamed. The doctor muttered something to Caroline and quickly left the house.
"Jack…" Caroline said softly.
"Please…take Matthew to your house until further notice…"
"Daddy…" the little boy said, tears coming on. Jack looked up, and motioned for the boy. Katrina put him down and the two hugged, the little one crying. Jack whispering he needed to be strong for Gwen, they both need to be strong for her. He promised to come get him the next morning and with a kiss on the forehead, he sent the boy on his way.
The other two left and Jack was left alone with his wife. He slowly opened the door, Suzie letting herself in and settling in on the window seat. Jack sighed, standing in the doorway but he quickly shut it and then heard faintly, "Jack?"
"Aye."
"…Just…stay…with…me." she got out. Jack smiled slightly, remembering the phrase.
"I'm here love."
"Jack?"
He frowned, and walked to the bed, "I'm right here, love." He said, taking her hand.
"Don't leave."
Jack stared at his wife. She had her eyes closed but surely she felt him, didn't she? "I'm not going to."
"Never?"
"No…never."
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Brenda wasn't sure why she was feeling so bad. Trevor was leaving - this is what she wanted. She had wished this from the very beginning. She had told him to leave and had told herself she could make it alone.
So why wasn't she helping him pack?
Not like he had a whole lot to pack. He only had a razor, some food, a pistol and a cloak, nothing more. Yet he was taking awfully long time to do so.
That's because he wants to help you.
Oh yeah…forgot about that fact.
Let him help.
No.
Of course, it's not like she didn't need it. She did. It was the day before her wedding and she didn't have any idea how to get out of this. She was hoping she could just take it in stride, but she had a feeling that was going to go out the window once the time came.
"Well, this is it." Trevor said, turning around.
Brenda sighed and nodded, "I suppose it is…take care."
Trevor paused, "Are you sure you don't want me here?"
She nodded, "Positive."
"Why not?"
She groaned, "Trevor, we've had this conversation!"
"You're going to marry a complete stranger! Are you not the least bit…"
"Scared?"
"Yes!"
"NO!"
He frowned, "You're not feeling anything?"
She shrugged.
"That's a lie if I've ever heard of. You're marrying this man! You're giving yourself completely to him and you're going to spend the rest of your life with him!"
"No I'm not. I'm gettin' out of it…somehow."
"The word 'somehow' should frighten you."
"I don't getfrightened." She said, started to pace around him. He followed her suit and soon they were circling each other slowly.
"Oh, because you're a Sparrow and Sparrow's are fearless?"
"Exactly." She hissed, "You should know that!"
"Yes, but somehow I found you to be different! You and Jack put up a mask for pirating and your enemies, but when Jack's around Gwyneth and Matthew… Did you ever see him rock Matty to sleep?"
Brenda paused, she had. It was most likely the sweetest thing she had seen in her whole life, her father was rocking Matty slowly, looking at him while he slept and whispering quiet promises to him.
"I have."
"You have. And you've done the same thing…I know that behind that rough and tough mask is a beautiful, sweet, caring woman."
Brenda swallowed, "But not fearless."
"Give it up!" Trevor said, stomping his foot.
"Trevor…" Brenda said, her voice rising, "You may think you still know me, or knew me to begin with, but you don't! You don't! Not anymore. There's been too much time…"
He shook his head, "Nothing's changed."
"Everything's changed." She yelled, frustrated with him and with herself.
He shook his head, his calm tone quiet, "Like what?"
Brenda sighed heavily, desperation filled her mind. "Trevor, don't make me say something…" she paused, looking at him, tears suddenly blurring her vision.
"There's something more. Tell me why you don't want me here." He spoke quietly, the exact opposite from the yelling Brenda had done earlier. Why had he always been so patient with her? Her father wasn't even this patient when they both were mad.
"I told you!" she yelled, "I don't want to bother takin' care of another person! Yer too…too…" She paused, hot tears threatening to make their way down. She wouldn't let them though. She was strong and didn't need him. "I don't need you here, Trevor! I don't want you here!"
"Why not?"
"You have another life! You have a family, a payin' job…and…and a bloody skirt waitin' for you! I have no one!"
"Is Matthew and Gwen no one? Is Jack no one?"
"You don't understand!" She yelled, the tears slowly pouring over. Anger laced her words now, "You have someone! Katrina loves you like no one else does! No one loves me like that!"
He paused, not sure what to say.
She shook her head, "I don't need anyone! I don't need you, I don't need dad or mom! Know why? 'Cause when it gets down to it- right here is where it counts. I'm alone here an' I can't have my mommy an' daddy bailin' me out of this! I have built myself on the foundation an' I don't need no one an' I'm gunna bloody fulfill that!"
"Brenda, you don't have to be alone!" Trevor said, his voice rising.
"I can't risk injurin' someone other than myself." She said, remarkably calmly. She looked at him with her tear-filled eyes and said, "I can't risk injurin' you."
"You're not going to hurt me…" He said quietly, walking towards her.
She paused, panicking. No. I don't want you here. No. "Leave!" She yelled. "I don't care where you go, but I want you t' go!"
"There's no reason for me to leave."
"I don't want you here!" she yelled. "I don't want you here with me! Go back t' yer precious Katrina before you get killed you bloody fool."
Trevor paused. So the truth came out. He was sure Brenda didn't mean for it to - but it did. She had feelings for him and it hurt that he was in love with Katrina. And except for the fact that he wasn't in love with Katrina, Brenda would've had a good reason to be hurt.
Wait - who says I don't love Katrina?
The week he had been here with Brenda seemed to be a week too much. Like Gwyneth had held on to her feelings for Jack, like a desperate puppy searching for it's owner, Trevor too had held onto his feelings for Brenda. And he knew that the first time he met Katrina. The only reason he pursued her was because her eyes reminded him of Brenda, and he wanted something - anything, to remind him of his first love.
Setting aside his thoughts and good choices, he blurted out his feelings, "I love you."
Brenda stopped completely, "What?" she whispered. "What did you just say?"
"I love you. I'm someone who will stand by you…I'm not leaving you because I love you."
Brenda would've started hyperventilating if she wasn't crying still. "Well…well…" she paused, this can't be happening. I can't have him here. I can't have him be in danger… "Leave. I don't love you and I don't want you here." She looked away, knowing he would be able to read her eyes if she didn't.
Now, not like he was expecting her to say it back to him, but he was expecting…joy mostly from his confession. He raised an eyebrow. "I'm not leaving you here."
Brenda shook her head and put her hand up to her mouth to keep the cries from escaping. What would it take? She took a deep breath, pushing back her feelings and reached for her pistol. She turned around slowly and pointed it at Trevor. A numbing look crossed her face while her lower lip trembled. "Get outta here while you still can, you bloody fool."
He paused, she wouldn't shoot…she wouldn't… "Brenda…" he said, taking a step closer to her. She wouldn't have it though. She shot at his feet, barely missing them, and reloaded quickly.
"If you don't leave, you'll be hurt. Now yer either leavin' by foot, or by coffin. Yer choice."
He shook his head but she cocked her gun and brought the gun so that it pointed at his chest. "If you think I'm jokin'…"
He paused, considering the choices here. "Now you bloody fool!" she screamed at the top of her lungs.
Someone would've heard that…and she knows it. He thought to himself. And although they were yelling before, it wasn't as loud as she just screamed. He shook his head, backing up slowly. He quietly picked up his bag and exited the room. Brenda dropped the pistol on the floor as her hands became limp. She instantly collapsed on the floor and cried all she had to cry.
Author Thanks: Due to the lack of…reviews on the last chapter, I'm going to hold off on the thanks 'til the next chapter. And usually I would've waited- but I'm leaving for San Francisco 'til the nineteenth…so enjoy this chapter and thanks to the three people who reviewed! (piper- long review again…yes!)