A helicopter pilot and a sentinel soldier stood by the roof railing, looking at the full moon overhead. The night was quiet and beautiful. The pilot's cigarette was flashing and fading in a soothing rhythm, followed by lazy phrases shuttling from one bored Hellsing subordinate to another. Suddenly the pilot stopped in mid-sentence and blinked. He could swear he saw something in the air - a dark thing crossed the moon disc at a weird trajectory and disappeared in the night sky. Naww, just an illusion... He placed a cigarette between his teeth and almost swallowed it, seeing the same strange shape in the air again, but much closer.
"Hey, Randy, look!"
"Heavens, what's that? A bird? An airplane? Or maybe..."
The unidentified flying object darted over their heads again. They could catch a glimpse of huge bat-like black wings and... a pair of nice shaped legs beneath them. Apparently female ones. The legs were kicking wildly.
"Chopper landing pad outpost! An unknown NHB here! It's closing! - the soldier on guard was shouting into his radio already. - I don't know if it's a FREAK... But it's freaky for sure!"
A shriek in the air above his head interrupted the rushed report.
"Waaaah! Master! Stop that! Yes, I've got what aerobatics is already! Nooo!!!"
"Stop whining, cop. It's fun, admit that! Bwahaha! Now, we'll make a barrel..."
"I'm air-sick! Throwing up is no fun at all! Stoooop!"
"Well, all right, party pooper. I'll show you how to make a proper aileron roll next time..."
The airborne silhouette softly landed on the empty chopper lot and turned out to be the two notorious Trash Cleaning Division employees.
"Thank you for flying with "Alucard and Co" airlines. Now you may unbuckle your belts." - Alucard grinned widely and released his grip on Victoria's waist. She staggered and almost fell on her rear side.
"Only cars from now on... Or trains... Only by land, like decent people do..." - mumbled the girl, trying to focus her eyes. The moon was going in wide circles above her head and she was pretty sure it wasn't an astronomic phenomenon.
Alucard chuckled mercilessly: "Decent people of our kin do fly, you know."
Victoria didn't bother to answer, just gave an evil eye to her Master. Sometimes he was... Alucard chuckled again, showing that her thoughts were clear enough to be read at the common level of their master-servant bond.
"Tsk-tsk... How very unladylike, cop. To use such words… Shame on you."
The older vampire scowled, trying to show all the pious disapproval he desperately lacked - the corner of his mouth was curving up treacherously. The black wings behind his back casually folded and melted into the red fabric of his trench coat. Alucard stretched and calmly looked around, ignoring the stunned rookies, who watched the scene cautiously from the roof's edge. The cigarette was still burning in the half-opened mouth of the pilot, quite forgotten by him. The soldier beside looked at the nosferatu with the round eyes of a surprised sheep. Fergusson's worried inquiries from the communicator on his shoulder were passing by his ears without any reaction.
"Let's go and visit the patients, Victoria. Hm, I wonder if they are awake already..." The vampire turned on his heels and headed to the exit. His apprentice followed, sending an apologetic glance and shrug to the men. They automatically nodded in answer, watching the undead disappearing behind the door. The silence wasn't broken until the girl started to shut the door behind her, but her ears caught the beginning of the pilot's whispered musings about vampires, their curious nature and habits, and their recent influence on his nerves. The speech was made in the best army style and a greenish tinge on Victoria's face turned into an angry blush. She snapped open the door, making the man choke in the middle of an elaborated rant, involving Alucard, his mother, blood, hell, shit and another dubious ingredients. For a moment the two stared at each other across the helipad. When the pause became unbearable, Victoria shook her head and gestured in the direction of the forgotten communicator:
"Tsk, tsk... Answer Fergusson already!"
Running down the stairs, she touched her lips to feel a carefree smile on them. She smiled like this for the first time since she had talked to Lady Integra. Ages ago, it seemed... Victoria started to jump three steps a time to catch up with Master.
Victoria quietly stepped back from the narrow aisle between the beds and the stands of medical equipment and tiptoed to the exit. Her retreat was left unnoticed by the other inhabitants of the ward - Integra and Walter slept, Dr. Trawelian and a nurse kept an eye on screens with vital characteristics, exchanging quiet phrases from time to time, and Master... He stood at the wall with his arms crossed on the chest, silently watching the sleeping face of Lady Hellsing. His eyes' expression hidden behind the sunglasses again, the face blank... Deeply absorbed in thoughts... He was like that since they had come in and Dr. Trawelian had informed them about the current state of his patients - out of coma, but weak and exhausted. According to the doctor, both Integra and Walter had had strange simultaneous fits some time ago, after which they regained consciousness. Severe pain had been gone, so the medics considered a portion of lightly sedated sleep to be the best cure in such a case. This turn of events assured Victoria that the crisis was over and a huge weight finally fell off her soul. They succeeded... Time to take care of herself at last.
Stepping back into the underground chamber of hers and mopping the still wet hair with a towel, the girl scowled at her uniform, sprawled on the coffinated bed. Hah. The more exact description of this smoke and blood-reeking heap was 'the pitiful remnants of her uniform'. How does Master manage to keep his clothes neat after all that messy encounters he always gets involved into? Do his clothes regenerate along with his body? Hm, basically it means that his clothes are... a part of his body? Victoria's hand stopped its repetitive movement along her hair, as its owner plopped on the bed, being preoccupied with a new thought. A part of his body - how handy! He can 'grow' any clothes he wants! Whoa! Wait-wait-wait... Sooo, if the clothes are the part of his body, then... Master walks around naked?! No, he's nakedness is well disguised with what seems to be his outfit... Then, what difference does it make to the common wearing of clothes? Oh, hell... Why everything about her Master is so damn complicated?
"You know, Seras, if I hadn't kept an eye on you all the time recently, I'd have said that you sucked dry all the blood from a stoned junkie... Judging by the flow of your thoughts." - came a sudden statement from the back of Victoria's mind.
"Eh? Uh-oh... - Victoria realized that her thoughts had been intercepted again and swiftly sat up. - Master! You did it again! It's... It's absolutely wrong!"
"Wrong? – the voice chuckled. - Agreed. I have called to say that you are needed upstairs. Now. And what do I hear, eh, police girl?"
"Er... - Victoria preferred to change the topic. - Why do you need me upstairs? I thought we are off duty now..."
"We are never really off duty. As for now, someone has to be at the phone in Integra's office in case of emergency. Go there, answer the calls, take notes and tell them that lady Hellsing is extremely busy and will return the call later. Understood?"
"Yes, Master. - Seras sighed, getting used to the idea of no rest. - Anything else?"
"Yes. In order to achieve the proper working atmosphere in Integra's office… changing into something more appropriate wouldn't hurt."
Victoria quickly glanced at the towel that supposed to be wrapped around her body. At the current moment the damned thing was enthusiastically role playing a wide belt.
"Ack!!!"
Seras smoothly slid through the layers of stone, lead and oak, stepping out of the wall of the locked Integra's office. It was silent and lifeless, the sharp geometrical pattern of black and white tiles on the floor softened with ghostly moonlight carpets. The lighting provided with the 'vampires' sun' was quite enough to see the tiniest details around, even to read, but Victoria turned on the desk lamp, following the human behavior pattern, still too vivid in her habits. She walked around the vast desk, hesitated for a moment and meekly seated herself into Integra's chair. Despite everything, she still felt almost like an intruder... The girl put her hands on the desk, resembling the stiff pose of a nervous kid at the very first day of elementary school. Time oozed as thick syrup, squares of moonlight on the floor crept to the wall inch by inch, changing their angles... Nothing was happening. Victoria's eyelids became heavy as if made of lead. She fidgeted in the chair, trying to shoo the soft but invincible tide of sleepiness away. Not much success... A helpless look at the reason of her suffering, the phone with specially scrambled line, ran into a small box beside. Lady Hellsing's infamous cigars... The box was half opened, being apparently thrown in haste and a few brown cylinders of tobacco stuck out invitingly. A weird idea came into Victoria's head. Hope Lady Integra wouldn't mind... And it's not like lung cancer threats the undead's health anyway... Anything to help not to fall asleep here is supposedly OK... The fingers of the fallen non-smoker closed on a cigar.
Fifteen minutes later Victoria felt much more at ease and anything but sleepy anymore. The second cigar was cheerfully emanating blue tresses of smoke into her mouth and the girl caught herself on humming a simple motive of a song she had heard on radio not so long before her death. Her body was so light... So weightless, it would probably fly like a balloon - if only she pushed the floor with her toes oh so lightly... She jumped up and swayed, as the room floated around her. So funny! She giggled, chewing the cigar's end. Victoria couldn't stand on one place, so she steered herself around the desk, turning off the electric light, suddenly so annoying with its fakeness. The wide beam of moonlight bathed the fragile frame of the young undead, flooding her soul with joy. For the first time the newborn vampire felt the pure peasure of being the child of the night. Swirling around, she spotted the blink of reflection on the black surface of a stereo system in the corner. Bingo! Music started to flow softly through the ancient room, making Victoria sing along with it. A worried purring of the phone suddenly cut into the wave of sounds and the girl halted and to leapt on the device as a cat on a mouse.
"Hello? Hellsing residence here!"
"Hello? - the masculine voice had a little electronic echo, as it happens sometimes in the long distance calls. - My name is Bernadotte. Mr. Dornez left me a message, telling to call him as soon as everything is ready. Can I talk to him now?"
"Uh... Sorry, but he's in bed right now..." - Victoria hurriedly picked up a sheet of paper to make a note and almost started to write with a cigar butt, still clenched in her right hand. This attempt made her utter a snicker and a muttered "Oops.".
"Oh. - a short pause followed, filled with the sounds of music from Hellsing side and vague distant voices and mechanical hum from the caller's side. - I was told to contact Sir Integral Hellsing, if Mr. Dornez is unawailable. Would you please call him to the phone, miss?"
"But she's sleeping, along with Walter... - Victoria recalled Master's instructions and panically tried to improve the situation. - Uh, I mean they both are really busy now! Can you leave the message? She'll return your call as soon as possible!"
"She?" - Mr. Bernadotte was clearly puzzled. Another pause fell.
"The message, please?" - Victoria did her best to sound businesslike, turning a pen in her fingers and oppressing a sudden fit of reasonless giggling. It was so strange... Heh. Heh-heh! Are there any more cigars in the pack?
"All right. Please, tell them that the team of mercenaries is ready. We'll go by the next commercial flight if the list of contracts is approved. When can I contact your superiors, miss? It's kind of an urgent matter."
"Um..." - Victoria's mind analyzed the information she had got from Dr. Trawelian and volunteered with "Tomorrow, I guess." and another idiotic snicker.
"All right, I'll call back. Bye." - as Mr. Bernadotte was hanging the phone on the other end, Victoria heard the trailing "Looks like we're going to a fucking weird place, guys... That Hellsing..."
"Heh... You bet. – chuckled his future undead co-worker, settling the phone back on its place. - Waaay more, than you could ever expect."
"Don't quote me, but you have your point here." - Master's head poke through the wall, horribly reminding a stuffed animal's head, which some proud hunters nail around in their homes, truly believing it to be beautiful. Victoria's loose imagination immediately decorated Alucard's head with wide deer's horns and several raincoats, hanging on them as on a peg. A wide smile spreaded on her face and she quickly clasped it with both hands. Master looked at her intently and moved out of the wall, breaking the association. Having crossed the room in a few wide paces, he surveyed the full ash-tray, working stereo system, a pretty flower border, drawn around the single word "Bernadotte" on the paper in front of Victoria. Alucard's brow rose. His subordinate was still covering her face with her hands, but a shining red eye looked at him through the tangle of fingers and blond strands with merry curiosity.
"Priceless. - broke he the silence at last. - Good grief, you've chosen the police instead of an office career, Seras. You are a real disaster as a secretary."
The wide opened eye blinked, merriness in it faded, being replaced with worry. The girl's fingers slowly slipped down from her cheeks. With ironic amusement Master watched emotions changing each other on his apprentice's face. She was always so transparent, when it came to this... He could read her face as an opened book without any bond powers, connecting their minds. Alucard would have despised and mocked such simplicity in any other vampire or human but... Oddly enough, but this feature even appealed to him in this case, appealed from the very beginning when he had seen the flurry of emotions on this face in Cheders' woods. Sometimes he had asked himself when the fate of an immortal being would change this naivety at last. Somehow, this time another thought came into his mind - would he really like the change?
"I... I remember everything that mercenary... Mr. Bernadotte... said! - protested Victoria hurriedly, jumping up from the chair, - I'll report his call word in word as soon as Walter or Lady Integra wake up!" Suddenly her legs became unsteady again and she ducked her head and gripped the edge of the desk to let her coordination return to normal.
"Still feeling high, eh? - Master's question was quite unexpected. The girl glanced up to see a wide grin of her senior. He chuckled. - No wonder. Haven't you known that?"
"Known what?" - the dialogue was downright weird, if anybody'd asked Victoria's opinion.
"Cigars. Haven't you known that some smells mean trouble for vampires? Garlic, for example. Never hang around any place where it is cooked, Celes, or you'll feel much more sick than after a whole night of aerobatics."
"Uh-huh, I heard about garlic, but..."
"Cigars are another matter, so it's not so well known among humans. - Alucard was obviously fond of lecturing, sitting on the corner of the desk and elaborating. - They work as a light drug, making vampires feel high and therefore lose control a bit. Or not a bit. It depends."
"Oh..." - was all the unfortunate smoker could say. She felt increasingly stupid.
"Besides, you've never smoked as a human, right?"
"R-right..."
"Heh. And an empty stomach too. You are pretty tough, considering all the facts. Here." - the vampire dug in the pockets of his red coat and fished out a pack of medical blood. - Actually, I dropped in here not to let you miss your lunch. You need more nutriments now to regenerate that holy blade wounds."
Victoria tentatively took the pack. As she was unfolding a plastic pipe on the top of it, a sudden idea stroke her.
"Master, did lady Integra... um... know about cigars, when she started to smoke them?"
"Well, maybe... I suppose she was just desperate to copy her father in all his ways - he had smoked a lot too. - Alucard pulled out another pack of blood and looked at it with an air of satisfaction. - Ha! I'm starving too... But even if she knew about cigars, she's not aware that I'm kind of immune to them, so her attempt to... er... cheer me up would never influence me."
"Oh, really?" - Victoria recalled Alucard's constant chuckles, smirks, snickers and mere laughing out loud and seriously doubted this statement. Her musings about Master's possible "feeling funny" time span were rudely interrupted with the phone. The girl motioned to pick it up, but Alucard's arm stopped her.
"I'll take it now. At least, this call will be answered properly for sure. - Alucard smiled and waved his hand. - Eat, watch and learn."
The ex-policewoman obediently leaned back in the chair and started to sip the blood, looking at the older vampire with slightly offended eyes. Alucard set his tie straight, picked up the phone and pronounced in an oh-so-pleasant voice:
"Hello. It's Hellsing institution. May I help you?"
The tube squeaked something incomprehensible in an angry man's voice. Alucard instantly lost his refined tone, as his lips crooked in an extremely nasty grin:
"Nice to hear you too, swine."
Victoria almost suffocated, having choked with her late lunch.