I still do not own anything. For full disclaimer check out chapter 2! Oh yeah and as a reminder all scenes in italics are flashbacks. Thanks for reading!!

"Well you see," Sara started. "I can't do this."

"What? You can't do what? Sara I don't understand."

"Nick, I was going to tell you I swear I was, but at the time it was just easier to leave. But then when you called, I had to see you. And then when you asked me earlier for coffee and asked me to tell you the truth about everything I was just going to lie. But I can't, just by looking in your face I cannot lie to you. Not about this.

Nick just sat and stared at Sara. He could not believe he was telling him this. This is not like her. Nor was her running away. There has got to be some reasoning behind all of it. He thought silently to himself, as he waited for Sara to start talking again.

Nick asked her to move in, he had no idea what he was in for when she said she was. But she was determined to change and hid all her secrets from him. Well for a while anyway, she thought to herself. I will tell him, eventually. It just hasn't come up. No need bringing up something that is of no importance right now.

Stop trying to fool yourself, Sara. She thought to herself. This is of importance right now and will always be.

Maybe I can hide it, just for a little while. He doesn't have to know right now does he? Not when we are so happy together. Everything is so simple and care free. I just want things to stay that way.

But he does, and this is life is everything but simple and care free and no matter how much you want things to stay that way you gave that chance up a long time ago.

True, but still I can pretend can't I? I've done it before and things turned out fine.

No they didn't. This is how this whole thing started. This is how everything began. How can you think that everything is going to turn out fine, if you don't admit it.

"Sara, hello earth to Sara." Nick had been watching her for about ten minutes. She had that same look the whole time. It was as though some memory was playing over and over in her head. It was as though she was debating with herself whether or not to say something aloud or to just keep quiet.

"What, oh sorry. I don't think I'm ready to talk yet, but maybe in a little while. How about we call it a night. Then meet up some other time."

"Sara, are you sure. I mean we don't have to. I have all the time in the world. I always have when it comes to you. You just have to ask for it. You know that right?"

"Of course, look I have to go now, bye."

"Wait don't leave..." But before he could finish his sentence she was gone again.

I can't believe I just did that. How could I blow him off like that?

You have done it before, what would have made this time any different? She asked herself.

I don't know. Maybe if I had actually told him why I ran away the first time. But I can't. I have no idea why.

Yes you do. You just don't want to admit it.

Stop it. Snap out of it. I just need to find a way to relax. She pulled out the all to familiar comforter. But this time, she pauses and then just looks out it.

"Is it worth it?" She asks the question aloud, although she thinks she already knows the answer.

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