Author's Note: Does anyone even read these? Hehe. Probably not.
Well here's the next installment. I'm not quite sure where you all are
crazy I'm going with this so haha you guys are crazy bear with me,
okay? (If someone read that, congrats) Oh! I just wanted say thank you
to all of you wonderful reviewers, I love reading everything you all
have to say. It totally makes my day. So thank you.
Disclaimer: Must you rub it in? They aren't mine. They're J.K. Rowling's and whomever she chooses to share them with. Lucky ducks. I'm not making any money off of this, it's purely for my enjoyment, and hopefully yours.
Fortunately for both Remus and Sirius, James didn't ask about the sudden distance between them. Remus was careful to seat himself at the other end of the short Marauder chain at breakfast and during class. He was sure that James knew something was going on, although he thanked the black-haired boy for his new subtlety—something that was sure to disappear as soon as James figured out exactly what was happening—and which wouldn't take him too long.
Unfortunately for the two ex-lovers, a project was being started in their Potions class and Remus was paired with Sirius. They spent that awkward period working on their own as much as possible, hands bumping accidentally, making them both mumble apologies and hurry away. Remus noticed that his hen's tooth powder wasn't quite as fine as it might have been had he not been spending most of the class resolutely not staring at Sirius. And failing quite utterly. Part of him was a little upset that Sirius seemed to accept the fact that they had broken up so easily. The other part of him knew that Sirius was in fact not taking it so easily. He was just better at hiding it.
For his part, Sirius was completely miserable. He managed not to grab Remus' hand and beg the blond boy to tell him what happened, but just barely. Sirius was confused and humiliated. How could he have though that Remus could care about him as much as he cared about the werewolf? He was probably just a passing crush for the werewolf, Sirius decided gloomily as he ground his own hen's teeth.
That class finally ended, and once again, Remus and Sirius walked at opposite sides. Peter looked puzzled and opened his mouth to ask a question but shut it abruptly as James elbowed him and glared. Lunch and the rest of their classes went on in a similarly silent fashion. Remus hardly touched his food, Sirius stuffed himself, and they both went to bed early. Neither slept well.
The next day was Saturday and Remus spent most of it pacing restlessly in the boy's dormitory. Sirius went outside before the sun rose and didn't come back inside. Finally, James couldn't take the tension anymore and, after telling Peter to stay, he went after Sirius.
The Seeker found his best friend sitting on the ground near the lake, knees tucked up to his chest. Coming up behind him quietly, James sat next to Sirius and waited. He knew his friend; the boy would break down soon enough and tell him what had happened between him and the other sulking Marauder.
When the boy didn't start talking, James got worried. "Well?"
"Well what, James?" Sirius' voice was thick with unshed tears and self- hatred.
James sighed in exasperation. "What happened?"
"Nothing."
The black-haired Seeker almost laughed and settled for putting his hand on Sirius' shoulder. "Listen, mate. I know you're upset. And I'm trying to help, but I can't do it alone. You have to tell me what happened so we can figure out how to fix it. Okay? So tell me what happened yesterday and we'll see what we can do. Don't leave anything out, okay? Because if you do, mate, we might miss out on something important. Got it?"
Sirius was staring at him wide-eyed. "Whoa." He breathed. "Where'd you learn a speech like that?"
James ignored the question. "Right. So what happened?"
Grudgingly, haltingly, James got the story out of Sirius. As he listened, James realized that something was Very Wrong. The way Sirius told it, it didn't sound like something Remus would do on his own. James knew how much Remus loved the Marauder sitting next to him. So why did he lie? There had to be someone else involved. James almost snorted; there guesses who?
If that was what was Going On, they would need to tread carefully. As much as James hated the boy, he had to acknowledge that Snape was a powerful wizard and potion maker. If they messed up, he would be onto them; and that would be bad. So, they would have to careful and try to convince Remus first. But how? If Remus was convinced that he was helping someone, he would never listen, even if it killed him. James sighed, stupid kind-hearted boy.
"So?" Sirius' voice brought him back from his planning.
"So what?"
"So what do we do?"
"Dunno yet. But we'll figure it out. I think the first step would be to talk to Rem—" James held up one hand to forestall arguments. "—You don't have to if you don't want, but I do.
Sirius' shoulders sagged in defeat. "Fine. But..." He looked up and locked eyes with James earnestly. "Don't hurt him okay?"
James grinned. "No worries. He's my friend too, remember?" He stood and waved to Sirius, then walked inside again. Peter grinned up at him inquiringly as he entered the common room, but James merely gave him a thumbs-up before continuing past him and up the stairs, hands shoved in his pockets.
The door to the dormitory was closed but not locked, and James entered quietly, sharp eyes sweeping the room for signs of anything dangerous. He saw nothing but a sad boy sitting near the window. The window showed a wide panorama of Hogwarts ground. Especially the lake. The golden-haired boy by the window was hugging his knees and staring at a similarly positioned dark- haired boy down below.
"You love him, don't you?" James spoke softly, afraid to break the moment. But it was already broken. Remus blinked and tore his gaze away from Sirius and fixed his liquid gold eyes on James.
"What? Of course not. I don't love him." Remus answered without conviction.
They both knew it was a lie. James approached Remus and sat down gingerly next to him. Sirius he knew how to comfort; they knew each other better. But Remus was different. He didn't open up to anyone, always withdrawn and quiet. Remus always watched from the side. If he had a problem, it stayed quiet. Even the Marauders never knew sometimes. So, James was at a loss.
"What happened?" He decided to be straightforward.
Remus looked away. "What do you mean?"
"Stop being a prat; you know what I mean. Sirius isn't out there almost crying for no reason. You won't come downstairs for no reason. How can you pretend nothing's wrong?"
The smaller boy sighed. "Look, James. I don't see how any of this is your business." The second the words were out of his mouth, he regretted them. James frowned, pressing his lips into a thin line and making his nostrils flare. He looked exactly like Professor McGonagall, and a little frightening, but he didn't seem to realize it.
"Of course it's my business you twit! You're my best friends! If you're miserable, I want to fix it. You would do the same." James had him there.
Remus sighed again. "That may be, but there's nothing wrong with me. I don't know about—about," he faltered. "Sirius, but I'm fine." Remus still wouldn't look at James, but his voice was steady. You're doing this for Sirius, he reminded himself, you can't tell anyone or Sev will find out.
James muttered something about 'bloody werewolves' and 'stubborn as bricks—and about as smart'. Remus almost laughed, but that would have ruined the mood. Mood was everything. If he kept up the way he was, James would give up and leave him alone. If he laughed, James would never leave. So he didn't laugh. Instead, he looked outside again. There was Sirius, beautiful head bowed. He looked like he was praying.
It became apparent to James that Remus wasn't willing to talk, and he left with a last promise to be there to listen. When he was gone, Remus moved to the red canopy bed, pulling the thick curtains shut around him. He curled up into a tight ball and tried not to cry. He failed. The pillow beneath his head drank his tears and offered him no comfort in return. As Remus cried, he hated himself for it, calling himself a coward and telling himself his pain was nothing compared to Sirius' and that he should be glad he wasn't a burden to the young man sitting outside alone. It almost worked.
Disclaimer: Must you rub it in? They aren't mine. They're J.K. Rowling's and whomever she chooses to share them with. Lucky ducks. I'm not making any money off of this, it's purely for my enjoyment, and hopefully yours.
Fortunately for both Remus and Sirius, James didn't ask about the sudden distance between them. Remus was careful to seat himself at the other end of the short Marauder chain at breakfast and during class. He was sure that James knew something was going on, although he thanked the black-haired boy for his new subtlety—something that was sure to disappear as soon as James figured out exactly what was happening—and which wouldn't take him too long.
Unfortunately for the two ex-lovers, a project was being started in their Potions class and Remus was paired with Sirius. They spent that awkward period working on their own as much as possible, hands bumping accidentally, making them both mumble apologies and hurry away. Remus noticed that his hen's tooth powder wasn't quite as fine as it might have been had he not been spending most of the class resolutely not staring at Sirius. And failing quite utterly. Part of him was a little upset that Sirius seemed to accept the fact that they had broken up so easily. The other part of him knew that Sirius was in fact not taking it so easily. He was just better at hiding it.
For his part, Sirius was completely miserable. He managed not to grab Remus' hand and beg the blond boy to tell him what happened, but just barely. Sirius was confused and humiliated. How could he have though that Remus could care about him as much as he cared about the werewolf? He was probably just a passing crush for the werewolf, Sirius decided gloomily as he ground his own hen's teeth.
That class finally ended, and once again, Remus and Sirius walked at opposite sides. Peter looked puzzled and opened his mouth to ask a question but shut it abruptly as James elbowed him and glared. Lunch and the rest of their classes went on in a similarly silent fashion. Remus hardly touched his food, Sirius stuffed himself, and they both went to bed early. Neither slept well.
The next day was Saturday and Remus spent most of it pacing restlessly in the boy's dormitory. Sirius went outside before the sun rose and didn't come back inside. Finally, James couldn't take the tension anymore and, after telling Peter to stay, he went after Sirius.
The Seeker found his best friend sitting on the ground near the lake, knees tucked up to his chest. Coming up behind him quietly, James sat next to Sirius and waited. He knew his friend; the boy would break down soon enough and tell him what had happened between him and the other sulking Marauder.
When the boy didn't start talking, James got worried. "Well?"
"Well what, James?" Sirius' voice was thick with unshed tears and self- hatred.
James sighed in exasperation. "What happened?"
"Nothing."
The black-haired Seeker almost laughed and settled for putting his hand on Sirius' shoulder. "Listen, mate. I know you're upset. And I'm trying to help, but I can't do it alone. You have to tell me what happened so we can figure out how to fix it. Okay? So tell me what happened yesterday and we'll see what we can do. Don't leave anything out, okay? Because if you do, mate, we might miss out on something important. Got it?"
Sirius was staring at him wide-eyed. "Whoa." He breathed. "Where'd you learn a speech like that?"
James ignored the question. "Right. So what happened?"
Grudgingly, haltingly, James got the story out of Sirius. As he listened, James realized that something was Very Wrong. The way Sirius told it, it didn't sound like something Remus would do on his own. James knew how much Remus loved the Marauder sitting next to him. So why did he lie? There had to be someone else involved. James almost snorted; there guesses who?
If that was what was Going On, they would need to tread carefully. As much as James hated the boy, he had to acknowledge that Snape was a powerful wizard and potion maker. If they messed up, he would be onto them; and that would be bad. So, they would have to careful and try to convince Remus first. But how? If Remus was convinced that he was helping someone, he would never listen, even if it killed him. James sighed, stupid kind-hearted boy.
"So?" Sirius' voice brought him back from his planning.
"So what?"
"So what do we do?"
"Dunno yet. But we'll figure it out. I think the first step would be to talk to Rem—" James held up one hand to forestall arguments. "—You don't have to if you don't want, but I do.
Sirius' shoulders sagged in defeat. "Fine. But..." He looked up and locked eyes with James earnestly. "Don't hurt him okay?"
James grinned. "No worries. He's my friend too, remember?" He stood and waved to Sirius, then walked inside again. Peter grinned up at him inquiringly as he entered the common room, but James merely gave him a thumbs-up before continuing past him and up the stairs, hands shoved in his pockets.
The door to the dormitory was closed but not locked, and James entered quietly, sharp eyes sweeping the room for signs of anything dangerous. He saw nothing but a sad boy sitting near the window. The window showed a wide panorama of Hogwarts ground. Especially the lake. The golden-haired boy by the window was hugging his knees and staring at a similarly positioned dark- haired boy down below.
"You love him, don't you?" James spoke softly, afraid to break the moment. But it was already broken. Remus blinked and tore his gaze away from Sirius and fixed his liquid gold eyes on James.
"What? Of course not. I don't love him." Remus answered without conviction.
They both knew it was a lie. James approached Remus and sat down gingerly next to him. Sirius he knew how to comfort; they knew each other better. But Remus was different. He didn't open up to anyone, always withdrawn and quiet. Remus always watched from the side. If he had a problem, it stayed quiet. Even the Marauders never knew sometimes. So, James was at a loss.
"What happened?" He decided to be straightforward.
Remus looked away. "What do you mean?"
"Stop being a prat; you know what I mean. Sirius isn't out there almost crying for no reason. You won't come downstairs for no reason. How can you pretend nothing's wrong?"
The smaller boy sighed. "Look, James. I don't see how any of this is your business." The second the words were out of his mouth, he regretted them. James frowned, pressing his lips into a thin line and making his nostrils flare. He looked exactly like Professor McGonagall, and a little frightening, but he didn't seem to realize it.
"Of course it's my business you twit! You're my best friends! If you're miserable, I want to fix it. You would do the same." James had him there.
Remus sighed again. "That may be, but there's nothing wrong with me. I don't know about—about," he faltered. "Sirius, but I'm fine." Remus still wouldn't look at James, but his voice was steady. You're doing this for Sirius, he reminded himself, you can't tell anyone or Sev will find out.
James muttered something about 'bloody werewolves' and 'stubborn as bricks—and about as smart'. Remus almost laughed, but that would have ruined the mood. Mood was everything. If he kept up the way he was, James would give up and leave him alone. If he laughed, James would never leave. So he didn't laugh. Instead, he looked outside again. There was Sirius, beautiful head bowed. He looked like he was praying.
It became apparent to James that Remus wasn't willing to talk, and he left with a last promise to be there to listen. When he was gone, Remus moved to the red canopy bed, pulling the thick curtains shut around him. He curled up into a tight ball and tried not to cry. He failed. The pillow beneath his head drank his tears and offered him no comfort in return. As Remus cried, he hated himself for it, calling himself a coward and telling himself his pain was nothing compared to Sirius' and that he should be glad he wasn't a burden to the young man sitting outside alone. It almost worked.