Disclaimer: This is not mine as much as Mark Evans is not integral to the Harry Potter plot! (that was so evil of her! I can't believe she didn't think that every harry potter fan would pick up on that and assume we were so smart, just when we think we've got her figured out, jk strikes again!)

A/N: you know, I'm beginning to think I am cursed when it comes to updating on time, I always wait five to seven days before updating because I like to let you guys wonder about what's going to happen next, but something always gets in my way to delay it longer. and I'm really sorry for making you wait this long again, and I know what your thinking "yeah, yeah, excuses, excuses," but really I do have a good reason, I have been as sick as a dog for the past week, and trust me when I say I would have much rathered been updating for you guys than being as sick as I was, yesterday was the first day I had food and now that I'm feeling up to being out of bed, so here you go, finally, chapter eight, and it's pretty long for me.

ok also, just warning you, there's more dursley's being mean to harry; I really don't think that Harry would make it up when he says like "the dursley's will just be upset I didn't find a way to get myself killed" and it's not like he's being sarcastic, so there must be some basis for these statements, just letting you know…

Rescue Mission

Lily and James rematerialized with a pop on the road that they were beginning to consider all their own.

"Well, that went well, didn't it?" asked James.

"Oh, yes, just think of how much he learned in those two short hours," exclaimed Lily, "Love and manners and honesty! He even said mummy and daddy! I hope he retains it all…he seemed so happy just to see us and hear us talking to him."

"Yeah," commented James, "It wasn't much, but it's more than the Dursleys do anyway…"

"You know," said Lily, "the sad thing is that he'll just think it was all some wonderful dream…"

"Well, you know what they say, dreams are the things that provide hope for us, or something like that, Dumbledore was always saying odd things like that…c'mon, let's go sit down for a minute," James said as he pulled Lily toward the grass.

They sat quietly for a few minutes. Then Lily suddenly spoke up, "Y'know, James I'm really glad I'm not here alone,"

James laced his fingers through hers, squeezed her hand, and kissed it gently. Lily continued, "I don't know what I'd be doing if I wasn't here with you…"

"You wouldn't be seeing ickle Harrykins for one thing," James cut in.

"True…speaking of which…" said Lily.

"You want to check on him?! Already? Now, Lily, I love him too, but we got back, what? two minutes ago? He'll still be asleep! You'll be watching him drool!"

"Two minutes up here is a long time down there, James," Lily said defensively.

"Alright, alright, the things you make me do…" muttered James.

James said his magic words and there in the large window was an image of Harry just after he woke up in the early morning.

"Ha! See! I told you!" said Lily triumphantly, "It's morning time!"

Harry was sitting on his cot, rubbing his sleep filled eyelids. Suddenly, a spider lowered itself onto Harry's arm; this caused Lily to grab onto James's arm, quite painfully for James.

"James!" Lily gasped, "That spider could be poisonous!"

"Lily," James said, "There are only two words that can accurately describe you at some times, and they are…paranoid mother,"

"Well, it could be…"

The spider was now crawling around on Harry's hand, and he was examining it with big green eyes that were sparkling with curiosity.

Slowly, carefully, deliberately, Harry lisped the word, "Spi……er, spi…er, spi-er!"

"James!" Lily screeched, "He's talking! Oh! Look at him! All by himself! We never talked about spiders while we were with him—HARRY'S TALKING!" And she threw her arms around James's neck in a big bear hug.

"Lily!" James choked, "Can't…breathe…here!" but he couldn't stop smiling himself. They both turned back to the window.

Harry was no playing with the spider, giggling as it ran around in his cupped hands; it seemed like it tickled him. Harry clapped his hands, and then, dismayed looked at them for his spider.

"Spi-er?"

He prodded what had moments ago been the makings of a pet; he sighed and carefully rubbed the spider onto the floor.

"Aw, poor Harry lost his playmate," said Lily.

"Don't worry," said James, "I'm sure there's plenty more where that one came from…"

Harry was now toddling into the kitchen for breakfast. He walked right up to his aunt Petunia and asked, "Mummy?"

She started and paled, shocked that he had talked in the first place, but had the complete nerve to talk to her about her. Petunia regained her composure, and her temper, quickly.

"I am not your mother; to me, you are only an unwanted burden."

"Where mummy?" Harry pressed.

"Dead. Gone. Died in a car crash. She'll never come and see you. You will live here with your uncle, cousin, and I and once you are old enough, you will earn your keep. "

"Yeah," snarled James, "and 'once he's old enough' he'll go to Hogwarts, save the entire world as we know it, come back, and kick your big, fat--"

"James!"

"Lily, why do you stand up for her, still?"

"I can't help it—we used to get along great before I became, in her opinion, a freak."

"The things she says to Harry about you though…" James muttered.

Everyone was now sitting down to breakfast, with Harry eating the pieces of toast that had been slightly burned and not to Dudley's liking.

"Eew, Harry!" Lily moaned, "You're touching your food with your spider guts hands! You didn't wash them!"

"Lily," said James with the air of explaining something patiently to a person very ignorant to the ways of men, "He is a little boy. Now, I don't think you ever realized this, but guys don't care about that stuff, you know, perfect hygiene and stuff."

"Oh, no, I figured that out from you, my dear," Lily countered.

"Well, popkin, are you ready for your Beach Party today?" Aunt Petunia asked of a Dudley whose face was almost completely covered with marmalade.

Lily's jaw dropped, "Two minutes in our time is two days their time!"

"Well, I guess you were more right than you thought," said James.

Breakfast was now finished and Aunt Petunia turned to Dudley, "Let's go put on your swimming trunks, hmm, my Dinky Dididums?"

Harry looked at her expectantly.

Petunia curled her lip into a sneer, "You shall not be swimming, you're only coming because we have no one to watch you. Go to your cupboard until it's time to leave."

Harry cast his eyes down and padded slowly to his cupboard. He crawled into his bed quietly and looked around solemnly for a moment. Then his eyes lit up with delight, for he spotted another spider which he could play with.

James chuckled, "Is it normal for a kid to have this much of an obsession with spiders?"

"Well, if he was treated like a normal kid, he would have toys to play with instead of evil, biting bloodsucking fiends…"Lily fumed.

"That would be a vampire, my dear. C'mon, he's fine. They're just common house spiders." James said rather jokingly.

"Hmph."

Back at the Dursley's, everyone was outside on the front lawn in the hot, bright sunshine. Vernon was ushering everyone into the car, Petunia was fastening the buckle of Dudley's car seat; Harry was sitting quietly on the bench seat.

"WITH NO SEATBELT!" Lily screeched, "SHE CAN'T EVEN PICK UP A SECOND HAND CAR SEAT FOR HER OWN NEPHEW!"

"Hey, look Lily, Vernon, just buckled him in, he's probably safer in that big metal car than if he was riding a wooden broomstick fifty feet in the air," James said consolingly.

"James Potter! You are the most ignorant prat when it comes to all things Muggle that I have ever met! Did you hear what she told him earlier—that we died in a car crash! Do you know why she said that? 'Cause it happens! Picture this: car traveling at sixty plus miles per hour, crashes into a tree, another car, anything! Harry goes flying forward through the seatbelt because he is too small to be sitting in one and gets seriously hurt! AND THERE'S NO MAGIC TO HEAL HIM!"

"Yeah, that would be bad,"

Lily rolled her eyes.

The Dursley's car was speeding down the highway and it soon arrived at the seaside. The Dursley's all clambered out, leaving Harry, in the car, unattended.

Lily panicked, "James! He could die in that hot car! I've read about stories just like this—kids left alone in hot cars for hours get seriously ill and sometimes die! You've got to go there and spring him from that car!"

"I'm on my way," James said with a determined air, already signing the parchment scroll with a hasty, untidy scrawl that might have been his name.

"One more thing James," said Lily urgently, "You can't let him recognize you, and then when you disappear after two hours, he'll be left alone in a parking lot where he can be kidnapped or run over by a car! Send him back to the Dursley's. They'll just think he got himself out of there somehow."

"Gotcha," said James, and with that, he jumped through the window.

After an eventful ride, James landed with a thump behind the Dursley's car. He crouched low and looked around fro something to use as a disguise. He spotted a small wooden building with a concession stand and restrooms. Outside of the restroom was a crate with the words Lost and Found painted on it in big bold black letters. James grinned and picked out a disguise.

Lily, watching him, murmured, "Oh, gosh, James please pick something normal…"

James emerged from the restroom a few moments later, now attired in a baseball cap, sandals, khaki shorts, sunglasses, and a blue flowered shirt, which he had left halfway unbuttoned.

"James Potter, you are a married man!" Lily exclaimed, "Oh, come on," she mentally chastised herself, "he's at the beach, at least he's fitting in and not attracting notice…"

Lily thought too soon.

"Hey man! Want to play some beach volleyball? We're short a player," said a big buff blonde guy who looked about James's age.

"Nah," James responded, " Thanks, but I'm headed back to my wife and son, Lindsey and James; y'know, spending a family day at the beach. I'm Jim by the way," and he stuck out his hand to shake the other man's.

"Good job James, disguising the names. We didn't go to Auror school for nothing!" said Lily.

A girl with long blond hair in a bikini came prancing up. The man pulled her to him.

"Jim, this is Stephanie, better known as Steph, my fiancé. And I'm Ben."

"Did you find a player yet, hon?" Steph asked.

"I asked Jim here if he was up to it, which he seems to be seeing as he looks like he works out a bit," said Ben, nodding at James's abs which were nicely toned from Quidditch, "but he says he's spending the day with his wife and son."

"Ooh! have them come watch you," gushed Steph, "I'm sure your little boy would love to watch you. Ever play volleyball much?"

"Um, no, actually, never played," James was beginning to get impatient, wanting to end the conversation and get to Harry.

"Really? Well, come on then, it'll be a learning experience," said Ben.

"Uh," James was getting desperate now, "Tell you what, I'll go talk to Lindsey and maybe we'll drop by later. We're going to be here all day."

"Alright, if you're sure," said Ben.

"Yeah, well it was nice meeting you two," James said, "See you later."

"I'll expect you,"

James nodded and waved as he turned and walked quickly back to the Dursley's car. Harry was inside, looking red in the face and sweaty, pressing the window buttons.

"Alright James, think," he commanded himself, "I have absolutely no idea how Muggles do this so I'll have to use magic," He glanced around quickly to make sure no muggles were watching, concentrated, then muttered quietly, "Alohomora,"

The door nearest Harry opened immediately. James quickly unbuckled Harry and lifted him out of the car. Harry looked up, smiled gratefully, and lisped, "Dank—ooo,"

"Oh, he remembered his manners!" Lily squealed.

She watched as James smiled and directed Harry towards the Dursleys. James then hid himself a little distance away so he could watch Harry during his remaining time.

Meanwhile, Harry had toddled up behind his aunt, who was sitting down in a beach chair, and tapped her on her unsuspecting shoulder. She nearly jumped out of her skin and rounded on Harry.

Her eyes flew open in surprise, "You! How did you get out of the car?!"

Harry just grinned.

"Well," Petunia sputtered, knowing this had to be as a result of his freakishness. "Who knows what he has done to the car?" she thought, and then continued aloud to Harry, "Well, we most certainly won't be taking you back there! Get out of my sight now!"

Harry scampered away, closer to the water. He spent quite some time there, examining rocks and shells, watching passerby, laughing at the birds that swooped over the water, just simply enjoying himself in his own quiet solitary way.

"It's good to hear him laugh," thought Lily.

James had just begun to relax while watching his son have fun for once, when he noticed Harry beginning to play in the shallow water.

"Great," muttered James, "He better not go too far out; he doesn't know how to swim,"

Harry went in a little deeper, the water coming up to his thighs now.

Then, Lily spotted something moving towards Harry—a kelpie which was changing between its usual form and some inconspicuous fish.

"Oh God, no," she whispered, "Look James, there's a kelpie! Get Harry out of there!"

Suddenly the kelpie took the form of a beautiful mermaid with long flowing red hair. However, it was clever enough to keep its tail under water—to muggle passerby it simply looked like a bathing teenager.

James immediately knew what it was and Harry noticed it too…

"Mummy?" he asked, stepping closer.

The kelpie shook back its glossy head, making the red strands catch the sunlight; it was luring Harry ever so slowly onto its back.

James was walking as fast as he could towards Harry without breaking into an all out run.

Harry was a wand's length away from touching the kelpie's beautiful hair.

The kelpie shook back its hair so it blew back in the wind closer to Harry.

Lily held her breath.

"Nooo!" James screamed. He grabbed Harry around the middle and concentrated with all his might on a placement charm. It worked—a bridle appeared on the mermaid, the kelpie turned back into its horse form, it turned and streaked away.

James held Harry tighter and ran before he made even more of a spectacle of himself. He barreled straight at Petunia, dropped Harry's soaking wet body on top of her Home and Gardening magazine, and kept on running.

Vernon Dursley stood up, furious, and shook his fist at James's fleeing back, screaming, "What the devil do you think you are doing, you hoodlum?!"

But James was still running, running across the beach, past the concession stand, across the parking lot, and then with a sudden pop, he was gone.

A/N: well, did you like it? there might be some typing/grammar mistakes—I was a little delirious from being sick, like I had the attention span of crabbe or goyle while typing this up, (seriously, that shows you how sick I was, I'm glad I'm finally getting better) and no, lily and james are not going to use up all their visits before Harry even starts Hogwarts, I've got it all planned out, and I do know what I'm doing for chapter nine, and I have a few ideas for chapter ten, oooh, and I'm going to make a songfic with kinda the same concept as this story, look for it coming in about week, but maybe sooner!

The Very Cool People who Reviewed Me! (and if you review this week you can tell me who you think the halfblood prince is and I will post the results on the next chapter!)

Miss Lady Padfoot- thanks a bunch! glad you came back and I hope it wasn't too long before I updated…

shloki- thanks! I will I will I WILL update this soon! I promise this time! I'm not sick anymore, and I will single handedly fend off all siblings from the computer…wait! here comes one, hang on… forces younger sibling to go read a book, enjoy the beautiful sunshine, etc…I'm back! ha!

groovygreek-yay! I'm soo glad you liked james's speech, I really liked it and I worked really hard on it! I know, I'm glad harry had one good birthday at the dursley's before he knew he was a wizard…

StagFlower15- wow, I made someone cry…I don't know what to say, I guess that's good! eek! I'm excited! you make me feel very flattered, y'know it would be cool and funny if jk came onto and read what people do to harry, lily, james, and co. just a thought

Laughing Dragoness- I know how you feel with summer camps, I still have two more this summer, but they're just in the morning, anyway…thanks!

Prongsie-gurl8- nice to have you back! I really need to have another happy harry moment in this story, but he just has such and unhappy childhood…I'll think of something to lighten the mood…well, anyway, thanks for your review and I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

I will now make up songs to get you to review! or maybe I'm still out of it and you all will just be very very scared of me…oh well!

don't know if everyone knows this song/cheer thing but here goes…

Bang Bang choo-choo train,

come on readers do your thing!

Read it, Read it, Read it!

Like it, Like it, Like it! ugh!

Now go REVIEW!

wahoo! wow, I'm in an odd mood…till next time! ciao!