Disclaimer: The Characters and situations of Harry Potter depicted in this fic are the legal property of J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury, and AOL Time Warner, and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended. A/N: This chapter is not beta-read.

Harry glared at the two of them for a few more minutes before he stomped away. Stupid Costa Rican boys. Stupid dolphins. Stupid..." Harry trailed off as he tried to find more things to dislike.

Two legged races, stupid bunk beds, stupid volleyball tournaments, stupid tree roots--

'I don't quite see a connection with the tree root,' Harry said, nonplussed as he picked up his pace towards the forest.

Don't worry. You'll get to feel it in about 3,2...1

Harry realized what his conscience was getting at the moment it was too late.

Wham!

Harry tripped and landed into the mud on the other side of the root in a faceplant so perfect it could have been in a cartoon. Dejectedly wiping some mud off his chin, he glared at his inner voice.

'Thanks for the warning, you... you... you..." unable to find a suitable name for the voice, he settled on one not quite offensive enough for his taste at the moment. 'Thing.'

The voice laughed in a decidedly evil way. 'I tried my best. By the way, if you want a name, you can call me Bond. James Bond,'' it said, voice shrilling and deadly serious.

Despite the situation, Harry couldn't help but laugh for a brief second. Perhaps it was the irony of it all; Harry Potter, who had defeated Voldemort four times, had broken countless bones in daring quidditch stunts, was now being driven insane by a high-pitched, squeaky little James Bond wannabee. Whatever the reason was, suddenly it all seemed funny. At least, for a second it did.

"You all good?" A 30-something woman with dark skin and black hair whom Harry recognized from the resort bent over him, looking concerned.

"Yeah," Harry said quickly, pulling himself up from the ground and brushing himself off. "I just tripped."

"I see. I'm Consuelo from Costa Rica, you're Harry Potter from England. I'm going on a walk, okay? You want to come, mmm?" She smiled kindly and indicated the path she was planning on taking.

"I'm sorry, but I have to get back. I promised my friend I'd be in the volleyball tournament," Harry said hesitantly. For some reason he liked Consuelo. If nothing else she was straightforward.

"You want to go to this game?"

"Well, not really, I did promise though," Harry answered reluctantly. He'd never played volleyball in his life, and the thought had never been particularly endearing, but he doubted taking a walk through the jungle with someone he'd just met would be any better.

"It's all good. You'll go to round two tomorrow, okay? Besides, I need help picking my fruit. No fruit, no juice. You're helping your friends by helping me, okay? Okay."

Harry nodded dutifully. "Okay."

They set out through the rainforest, Harry trying to keep up with Consuelo, who moved like a cat over the bumpy ground. After what seemed like an eternity (in which Harry realized that sitting on a broom and occasionally reaching for a golden ball didn't actually keep you in shape, as some people mistakenly believed) they made it. The canopy of the forest had opened, revealing a fairly large grove of fruit trees. Consuelo was already picking, and she motioned him forward, her outstretched hand holding a burlap sack.

"You pick from these trees, okay? I need twelve starfruit, this big." She held out her hands to show him the size. "Then you can get me one bananas one bunch yellow. Okay? Okay."

Harry nodded and started picking the fruit, pulling each branch down and letting it spring back up. He had almost finished with the mangoes when Consuelo spoke.

"You're here with your friends, mmm?" Consuelo asked, pulling a small, green fruit from a branch.

"How'd you know?"

"You can tell. The hair. Besides, you weren't looking at the girl like familia, right?"

For some reason she hadn't made it sound like she was making fun of him, and Harry decided to trust her.

"Yeah, kind of." He muttered.

"Don't think about it. Nobody notices like me. Eyes like a bird," she said proudly.

"The thing is, now that I've realized that I, well, fancy her, I'm not sure what to do next." Harry extracted a ripe bunch of bananas from a stocky tree.

Consuelo pulled a two mangoes from a branch, started peeling one, and handed the other to Harry. He held it unsurely, not knowing what to do with it.

"Do you want me to put it in the bag?" He asked.

"No, no, no. You tell me you want to win the girl, so I help you, mmm? Give her the mango, okay? Okay."

"Why?" He looked at the fruit, which, even though it looked tasty enough, didn't exactly seem romantic.

"Trust me. A man I knew gave me a mango from this very tree, and look today. I marry him." She showed him a thin band of silver on her left ring finger.

"Are you quite sure it was the mango?"

"Aye. Yes, quite sure. Not all the way, but close enough. Either way, it's worth a try though, mmm?"

----

Harry lay in bed that night, wanting to sleep but afraid of dreaming. Hermione hadn't been as disappointed as he'd expected about him missing the volleyball tournament; in fact, she'd been in a rather chipper mood ever since he'd gotten back. He wasn't positive, but he could guess from Ron's glowing cheeks what it was about. Just as he started thinking about them, Ginny and Hermione stepped inside (they'd been sitting on the hammocks), both of them talking a mile a minute. Harry shut his eyes as soon as they approached and pretended to be sleeping as Hermione glanced from Ron to him skeptically.

"Are they asleep?" Ginny asked, a bit more quietly. Hermione laughed.

"Yes, I think so. Well, you can tell Ron is, with that snoring, I was just making sure Harry didn't have his glasses on. It's a dead giveaway, you know."

Harry made a mental note, grateful he'd taken them off last minute before they came in.

They two of them sat on Hermione's bed. Ginny grabbed a flashlight from the table and turned it on.

"Okay, so tell me exactly what Johann said," Hermione whispered. Harry's fingers silently slid along the ledge next to his bed until they located his glasses. Pretending to turn in his sleep, he slipped them on the bridge of his nose and watched them from the corner of his eye.

Ginny gave a secretive grin. "Well, after the volleyball game he came up to me and told me I played very well. We talked for a few minutes, and he asked me if I'd been to any waterfalls in Costa Rica yet. I told him no, and he offered to take me to one that hardly anyone except a few locals knew how to find. It sounds really beautiful. He's taking me early tomorrow." She giggled happily. Harry dug his fingernails into the palms of his hands.

"And your Mum's okay with this?" Hermione asked in amazement.

"Yep. Turns out she'd spent quite a while talking to the manager that morning, who happens to be Johann's father. I guess he told mum all about how Johann knows the rainforest by heart or something, because she hardly hesitated in letting me go... I was sure I was going to have to sneak out and everything."

"But you do fancy him?" Hermione asked, sounding slightly off-put for some reason.

"Wait one minute, I think I saw Ron twitch. Let's talk under the covers, okay? Besides, I don't think you want him hearing when you tell me what happened today when you two went down to get the sandwiches and didn't return for fifteen minutes."

"Shhh!" Hermione said, but she was grinning. Harry heard no more as they disappeared under the blanket. He was quite sure he didn't want to, anyway. Especially the part about whether she fancied him or not. Feeling more disheartened and jealous than he had felt any other time that day, he removed his glasses again and closed his eyes. On the windowsill in the corner, the mango he had neglected to give to Ginny rolled off and fell to the ground with a soft thump. A last thought flitted through his mind before he drifted off to a restless sleep. Perhaps he couldn't stop the two of them from going, but maybe, just maybe, he could watch and make sure this Johann kept his hands firmly to himself.

A/N: Can you guess what's coming next? That's right, Chapter Six: Secret Agent Harry Potter. Thanks for waiting, please tell me if you think this chapter was too dull, and now I'm deep enough into the story that you can even tell me if you think I'm 'meandering aimlessly'', though I can still hope you won't. (o:

And, as always, can you please, please, please give me feedback? I know it's a lot to ask, but if I could have 50 reviews by the end of this story it would mean the world to me-- they don't even have to be good reviews either. If you think I'm a hopeless case and should give up writing before I humiliate myself further, tell me! (I think so myself sometimes, lol) So, even if you usually stay a lurker, could you come out of the darkness and give me your (however brutally honest) thoughts? Thank you!

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Pronunciation:

Johann= Yo-hawn

Consuelo= Con-sway-lo

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Reviewers:

VoicezWithin: I love your username sooo much! Sorry, had to say that. (o: I'm so glad you think it rocks, and I apologize for making you wait so long. Also, thank you for writing your review in caps. Makes me happy. (o:

ilovesmiles=): Aww, you love it? Thanx. I'm glad everyone likes the conscience; it's actually quite challenging for me to write, which is why you only see him appear once or twice each chapter. Keep the reviews coming and I'll keep the chapters coming!

authenticpoppy: Thanks very much. Although he's not having much fun at the moment, is he? Oh well. I promise I'll be nice eventually. O.o Thanks for the tip as well, but I decided the Draco story wasn't happening. )o:

JamieBell: I always look forward to your wonderful reviews. Ouch! I'm sorry about your wisdom teeth; I haven't had mine pulled, but my friend had hers and she was in misery. I'm glad you like the Weasleys-- your opinion means a lot. (o;

MsMissProngs: Thanx, I'm trying but I've been gone for a month. After I get back from yet another camp they should be posted fairly quickly.

HGfics: I'm very happy you think it has potential, and the characterization comment was very high up in the best you could give, as I think I've mentioned before. I hope you continue reading.

Illusions Industry: Another creative username, I luff it. (o: I'm happy...glad... (need to think of a new word here) Joyous that you think its cool, lol.

Ami-ImaTomLOVER: Thanks again for the great beta-ing, hope you'll still do the chapter after this one! Lol, Deja Vu, eh? Wonder why, lol.

Persephone's-Child: Yes, he does doesn't he? Well, he does have quite a temper in the books. Wisps off fluff ought to be appearing in a couple chapters, I hope you wait to see it! (o;

Miss Effie: I'm glad I met your approval! You're another one who I love to hear reviews from (actually, I love getting reviews from anyone, but you know what I mean. (o;). You are very welcome for the italics. Boy-o. giggles

Koonelli: Your review also made me laugh out loud--no offense to the British language, of course. (o; Feel free to give me tips on the lingo. And I'm from the States, a Montanan, though I'm Californian at heart. On to your 'ridiculously more important'' questions, lol. Tico isn't the boy's name, it's actually just Costa Rican for a native of the country. (Tico is boy/male, Tica is girl/female). And for your second question, where was I? In Costa Rica of course! (o: It was really amazing, other then one little problem which I'm not going to get into because it would probably end up being as long as the chapter. (o: Anyway, thanks again for your bloody brilliant review! (Yes, that was my feeble attempt at Briticism). Oh, and congrats again on your wonderful wonderful new sad Lily/James fic, I can't get over how good it is.