A/N: Lilli still hasn't had her kittens yet, but she looks like she's ready to pop. I haven't been this nervous since my cousin was born. Here you go.

Chapter Fourteen: Dancing in the Dark

"Okay, that was weird."

"What? I'm serious."

"I think I need to meet your brothers, Gin." Cass had finally been able to speak after suffering a laughing fit when Ginny told the story of Fred and George's European Bathing Suits, which had transformed from long, Gryffindor-colored trunks to tight gold lamè Speedoes whenever Harry and Ron got them wet. They had refused to let Ginny try the stylish female model, but had encouraged Hermione wholeheartedly. She had sensibly decided to wear her own, and Percy was scandalized when Penelope Clearwater's long-line one-piece Catalina suit transformed into a string bikini before his eyes. "By the way, do you think they could make me a blue one?"

"You want to wear that kind of thing?"

"Why not? I think it could be quite shocking."

"Okay, is the point really to shock the guy?" Hermione asked.

"Not really, just kind of an added perk. They look so cute when they're scandalized."

"Ginny-?"

"Hermione, no! You can't do it! No!" Ginny protested jokingly.

"Really, Hermione? Who are you seeing?" Lavender asked. Cass stepped in at that point.

"Oh, he's not a student."

"A Muggle guy?" Parvati looked seriously impressed. "Hail to the goddess!"

"You go, girl," Lavender added.

"You don't think dating a Muggle guy is strange?" Cass asked.

"Are you mad? Muggle guys are hot! Look at this!" Lavender pulled out a dog-eared Muggle teen magazine and indicated a picture of Sean Biggerstaff. "He's a golden god!"

"Lemme see that," Cass asked. She scrutinized the picture carefully. "Well, he's cute enough. It's the voice that really turns me on."

"Figures. I haven't heard your husband say more than two sentences at a time." Ginny looked at the magazine but was unimpressed. "I've got cuter brothers than him."

"Well, it's not like it's his first language," Cass defended.

"It isn't? What does he speak?"

"Wolfish."

"Wolfish?" Hermione asked confusedly.

"The language of wolves."

"Er..."

"My husband is a werewolf and he was born that way. He and his family spoke Wolfish most of the time, and he learned people-talk when he was about six."

"Can you speak it?"

"Naturally. John's been helping me a lot."

"Say something in it," Parvati challenged. Cass seemed to stare at her for a few seconds, and then she scratched her ear. "Well?"

"I just called Professor Snape a git." The girls looked at her in amazement. "It's rather a subtle language."

"God, you're so fun," Lavender remarked. "Professor McGonagall never has sleepovers. Is it because Americans are fun?"

"Naw. It's probably 'cause I'm closer to your age. When Professor McGonagall wants to be, she is a party freak."

"Exactly how old are you?"

"With or without the Time-Turner?"

"You had a Time-Turner?" Hermione was amazed. "Those things are dangerous."

"Tell me about it," Cass remarked. "I went from sixteen to twenty-four in two years."

"How?" Hermione was shocked. Maybe this was why Cass looked so terribly sick.

"Well, have you ever done the math for how much you sleep? By the time you're sixteen, you've been asleep for almost six years. I just went back every time I slept, got extra time whenever I wanted to keep working, and sometimes I went back so I could talk to myself."

"Isn't that terribly illegal?"

"Not if you make the Time-Turner yourself." Cass pulled out a necklace from under her robes. It was considerably less neat and polished than Hermione's, and it had less sand. "Took me quite awhile to make it work. Does forty-five minutes at a shot."

"Wow! A zip gun Time-Turner!" Ginny was sarcastic, but impressed. "Now we can blackmail you!"

"No, y'can't." Cass pulled out a silver object on the same chain. It looked remarkably like a badge.

"You're an Auror?" Hermione was shocked.

"Ohmigod! Are you going to arrest Snape?" Lavender asked.

"Being a sexy man-bitch isn't a crime." Cass tucked her badge in and took out her wand. "John would be in Azkaban otherwise."

"What are you here for?" Ginny asked.

"To watch you and your boyfriend's asses, natur'lly." Cass cracked her knuckles and twirled her wand. "I'm also going to save the souls of the Slytherins with the vast healing power of rock n' roll."

"You're not serious," Lavender gasped.

"Oh, honey, you have no idea. Obliviate!" Cass quite coolly wiped the memories of the class gossips, leaving Hermione and Ginny ever so slightly terrified. She then gave them a cheeky wink, as if to say 'I can trust you two.'

"So, what were we talking about?" Parvati asked.

"Sean Biggerstaff," Cass supplied.

"Oh, he has a sexy voice," Lavender observed.

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"Severus?" Hermione asked, knocking on the walls of the Potions room. She was having trouble remembering where the opening to his rooms was. "Severus, please be awake, come on!"

"Miss Granger?" Hermione spun about. Snape was in the doorway. He closed, locked and warded the door before coming closer to her. "Hermione, what's wrong?"

"Cass! She's an Auror! She thinks you're really working for Voldemort!" Hermione hugged him close and struggled not to burst into tears.

"Oh, sweetheart, no. I know Cass is an Auror...she works with me." Severus pulled her close and stroked her hair. "How did you find out?"

"She told Ginny and I tonight. We were having a sleepover...and she Obliviated Lavender and Parvati, just shot 'em with it, no warning or anything. It was so scary, she was just like a Dark wizard!"

"Hermione, it's a good thing Cass can curse that way. Aurors have to be able to." Severus thought for a second and then something occurred to him. "You weren't ready for this at all, were you?"

"Ready for what?"

"This war. You thought Cass Tyler was just an eccentric American, one of the steady stream of new teachers, and it turns out she's here almost exclusively to keep you from getting killed. Even I'd find that a nasty shock."

"It's just...if there are Aurors here, it must be so much worse than I expected. My parents were safe, and I guess I just assumed the Death Eaters weren't that adept if we could all be missed that way."

"Darling, the attack on your house was a glorified warning shot." Severus opened the wall to his chambers and led her to a soft chair, sitting opposite from her. "That was just to scare you. I hate to put it this way, but destroying a house is the Death Eater equivalent of an unkind letter."

Hermione suddenly began to giggle.

"I'd hate to see what a Howler'd be like. My parents killed, Harry kidnapped, Ginny raped..." Hermione giggled on until Snape finally smacked her with the back of his hand, and then she stared at him in mute shock, tears racing down her cheeks.

"Have you been reading?" Severus asked.

"You know me," she sobbed.

"Gods, you'd think Pince would keep the Prophet archives away from you," Severus pulled her close to him, lifting her onto his lap on a couch between the two fat chairs. "There are some things children shouldn't know, especially when they might happen to them."

"I'm not a child," Hermione said defiantly a moment later. "They can't scare me any more."

"Don't give up on innocence, m'love. You never want it until it's gone." Suddenly Severus winced and held his forearm tightly. Hermione gently took his left hand in hers and pushed up his sleeve. The Dark Mark was burning black.

"He's calling you, isn't he?"

"Yes." Severus kissed her softly. "I have to go."

"May I stay here and wait for you?"

"I don't know, I'm usually sort of unlikeable after a Dark Revel..." Severus sighed and smiled. "Of course, darling. But you have classes tomorrow, why don't you get some sleep?" He gestured to a more than usually large four-poster with what looked like a black crushed velvet comforter. "I'll take the couch here when I get back."

"Naw...why don't I take the couch?"

"The couch is wretchedly uncomfortable."

"Then you can't sleep on it after a what-is-it."

"Well, you shouldn't-"

"Why don't you just sleep in the bed with me when you get back?"

Severus looked as though he had been electrocuted.

"Er...what?"

Hermione was struggling not to laugh.

"Oh, gods...I see what Cass meant about shocking guys. You really do look cute."

"Did she tell you to proposition me?"

"I wasn't propositioning you..."

"Oh, good. Because that would be...not that I don't want to be propositioned by you or anything, it's just that I think we could let that wait...maybe a year or so?"

"I'm not into leaping into bed at the first moment."

"Neither am I. And I wouldn't expect you to be the type."

"Why, Professor! Are you slighting the seductive nature of Gryffindors?" Hermione asked jokingly. "I have skills you've never dreamed about."

"Are you slighting the dreaming nature of Slytherins?" Severus kissed her on the cheek. "I'll think of you while I'm gone, keep me from going insane while I grovel."

"I can't see you groveling."

"No, you can't. You're not allowed to go along. I'd better go before I get bodily pulled to the Riddle house."

"Voldemort can pull you in ...like a fish?"

"Regrettably. He has some kind of intensified wand for it, sort of like your Muggle broadcasting towers."

"This is going to sound rather childish, but I'd love to smack that son-of-a-bitch well into next week."

"Hermione, do me a favor."

"Anything."

"Avoid picking up the Americans' metaphors. I heard Cassandra call John a tiger the other day."

"Where?"

"I think they were in a broom closet."

"Severus, dear, don't follow them unless you have to."

"Why? And what potion are you really making for Cassandra?"

"Promise you won't let on you know?" Severus nodded. "Fertility. Her pH is completely out of whack. I'm fairly sure it's because of all her time-altering."

"You may want to read 'The Modern Lycanthrope,' there on my night-table. Sometimes pH alters after a werewolf bite. That may be the problem." Hermione picked up the book.

"R.J. Lupin? I didn't know he wrote books!"

"Oh, he's brilliant. I like him the most of all James Potter's annoying Gryffindors." Snape winced again and Hermione kissed him.

"You'd better go."

"Sleep while I'm gone?"

"Alright. Join me when you get back?"

"Alright. Goodbye, darling."

"Be careful, Severus."

One last kiss and he was gone.

Hermione quickly found that she could neither rest nor read. After pacing a worn bit of carpet that she assumed was Severus' own personal pacing place, she finally perched on the bed to wait. As the hours passed and she grew more nervous, she drifted slowly into a nightmarish sleep.

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"Severusss?"

"I am here, my Lord."

"And why did it take you sso long?" Voldemort's sibilant voice inquired.

"I had a slight problem ...a Gryffindor out of bed after curfew."

"How sstupid they are," the Dark wizard hissed. "They susspect nothing of what iss to come to them."

"I assure you, my Lord, their nightmares are all they have to warn them."

"Ah. And what iss thiss I hear of an American?"

"Oh, a pathetic female. Can hardly use a wand."

"Another Defenssse Againssst the Dark Artsss?"

"Worse. American Muggle Studies."

"How uselesss." Voldemort looked suddenly at Snape with hideous red eyes. "Either make her loyal to you or kill her. You know what to do."

"My Lord-?"

"Don't protesssst, Severusss. You're lucky to have such a sssimple asssignment after lasst year. Alsso, I want a Mudblood."

"A Mudblood?"

"Yess," Voldemort licked his lips with a tongue that honestly looked forked. "Luciuss has told me of a girl who offendss his sson...I want her brought to the Dark before the year is out."

"But my Lord! She's a Mudblood...and worse, a Gryffindor!"

"Then you should enjoy breaking her heart and her ssspirit. You may depart, Severuss, before that old fool noticess you're gone."

"Thank you, my Lord. Consider it done."

With a heavy, strongly disgusted heart, Severus disapparated to the gates of Hogwarts and walked slowly to his dungeon rooms. He could tell her to leave him now, or he could risk having to hurt her beyond repair. But he couldn't do it now. She was asleep, twitching and occasionally mumbling incoherent words. Gently, he brushed the wild hair out of her face and kissed her forehead. He would stay up tonight, trying to decide.

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"Darling, you're scandalous. The young Slytherins speak of noone else." John kissed Cass and gave her ear a friendly nip.

"Been spying, love?" she asked.

"It's practically too easy. They all use Dictoquills to write home and nobody wards their door after locking it. Not to mention their passwords are a joke. Severus hasn't even had to tell me one."

"Aren't they such a lot of pricks?"

"Well, the males are. The females I feel really sorry for. How can they put up with those little shitheads is beyond me."

"Is that how you say 'shithead'? I thought that was 'git'."

"For 'git' you extend your paw –hand a bit further toward your ear."

"Oh. I still think my accent's off."

"Well, darling, you have fingers. Wolfish is properly done with paws." John spoke and used Wolfish simultaneously to practice. "By the way, I've brought you some bad news. One of the Slytherin girls is getting beaten up –or was, and we have to make sure he doesn't sneak into the school and hurt her."

"I'll make myself her shadow. What's her name?"

"Blaise Zabini...I was actually sort of thinking she and Hermione could be friends."

"How clever. I suppose I can slaughter a sacred ram to accomplish that?"

"What do you mean? They're both girls."

"Yeah, just from opposite Houses! Hermione's okay, but your Blaise is a Slytherin. She'll probably try to off her or something!"

"For god's sake, Cass, quit reading 'The Godfather.' Blaise needs a friend. She and Maria Catesby are maybe the two sane ones left."

"Then why can't they be each other's friends?"

"Because Maria is almost as badly off as Blaise. I was thinking Ginny for her."

"John, dear?"

"Yes, Cassie m'love?"

"Women don't make friends that easily."

"As Oscar Wilde said, 'I imagine they'll be calling each other sister within the hour.'"

"As Oscar Wilde also said, 'Women only call each other sister after they've called each other a lot of other things.' Frankly, I don't want to see two females duking it out in the halls, and I think you're just a little fetishy to risk that."

"Oh, ye of little faith. I have a loophole."

"A loophole?"

"Yes. Both Blaise and Hermione are freakish bookworms. I'll just lock 'em in the library."

"That's not a loophole, that's a plan!"

"Sorry, wrong word. I have a plan."

"And it's a good one. But I have a plan also."

"What is it?"

"I'll take you to this fascinating room I found in the dungeons, take your clothes off, and bang your wolfy brains out."

"Was I bad?" John asked. "What will you bang them with?"

"Darling, 'bang' is a metaphor."

"Oh. I was just gonna say, why would you...oh, my."

"So, is that a good plan, you think?"

"I think it is a remarkable plan. Can we get some dinner first?"

"Sure. I told Dobby we'd be wanting some food, so we'll drop by the kitchens on the way."

"Fruitcake for dessert?"

"Yep."

"I love you, Cass. You know me too well.

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"Alright, explain." Ginny and Hermione had cornered Cass.

"What?"

"How are you here? Who sent Aurors into Hogwarts?"

"Dumbledore sent for me."

"All right. If you're supposed to be sixteen, how are you an Auror at all?"

"See, the thing is," Cass explained, "I'm not as old chronologically as I am legally."

"Me neither. I added around fourteen months with a Time-Turner," Hermione pointed out, but Ginny looked unimpressed. Fourteen months and eight years were very different.

"Well...in years I should be a couple months younger than you."

That was certainly a shock to the British girls.

"But...but you're an Auror! You're-"

"Married? Yes, Father threw a fit when I said I wanted to marry John."

"Did you have to elope?" Ginny asked.

"No. John dressed up in a Muggle suit and tie and very eloquently asked him for my hand. I felt it was a little antifeministic of him, but Father appreciated it. Then John went into Father's study and either argued, debated or just talked him into giving us his blessing. I was amazed, to say the very least."

"So'm I. He never seems to talk at all," Ginny agreed. "I guess he talks in Wolfish a lot when you two are alone."

"Absolutely. Why just last night..."

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A/N: Still no kittens. Maybe I should go check her stomach now.