(Disclaimer: I don't own anything at all. So don't sue me. Please.)

A Note from the Author: Dun dun dun. Seth becomes suspicious. And it only took twenty or so chapters! Whee! And sorry, no Summer here, but there is Seth/Ryan interaction, which is just about the hardest thing for me to write. The show does it so well with the witty banter, so it's hard to recreate here. With that said, please review and tell me if they seem too OOC or not, and I'll try my best to improve with any suggestions you might have. Also, is it plausible that Summer's mom's funeral is so close to Christmas? Because I know usually they want to bury the body as soon as possible, but like, isn't there a holiday break or something? Ah well. In my universe, that can happen. Onwards. (And yay, fluff for Chapter Twenty-One. Although the idea of the gerbil will be somewhat tainted, but oh well.)

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chino felt apprehensive as he surveyed his surroundings. Hmm. Clean area. Lots of light. Nice and quiet. It would be his ideal space if he didn't feel so lonely right now. He hadn't realized it before, when he was younger, but after leaving everything that he ever knew behind to live in such lavish conditions, he was beginning to see why everybody started pairing up once they reached maturity. So why was he still alone, in such an unnatural state?

It was best not to dwell on it now, he supposed. He had just built this wonderful bed of cotton and wood shavings, and he couldn't wait to try it out.

Likewise, Ryan was wondering how the hell he ended up so dissatisfied with the pool house. He had liked it at first, all isolated from the main house, his little fortress of solitude. Now, he felt that there was something missing from it. Or someone. Maybe it was just the winter blues, he mused. Newport had been summer-y for about three quarters of the year, and this brief interlude of a slight chill was making him think crazy thoughts.

Crazy. Well, that was a word that took on a whole new meaning these days.

He never thought of Marissa that way, despite the rumours. She was just… inconsistent sometimes, that was all. And a bit scatterbrained, he had to admit. His Chrismukkah present from her was this platinum watch all decked out in special functions and buttons, and he didn't want to even think about how she could afford it (or how she came to 'acquire' it). He had sent it back with the warmest of apologies, the memory fresh in his mind about the last Chrismukkah that they had spent together at the mall.

He guessed that she hadn't returned from in L.A. yet, since she hadn't resumed coming to the pool house in person and her phone calls were becoming more infrequent. Just like Luke. The boy had literally vanished from the social radar for two weeks now, and Ryan had started to worry about him.

Luke may be the biggest jackass on the planet, but he was still his friend.

However. Of all the (older) women Ward could've chosen, out of all the girls at Harbour secretly pining for him, he had to go and choose Julie Cooper. The very idea sounded ludicrous to Ryan. Rule number one in the dating handbook was that you didn't date your ex-girlfriend's friends, let alone her mom. Then again, Ryan was dating his supposed brother's ex-girlfriend, so he couldn't pass judgment.

He knew that he couldn't hide this secret for long. When Summer returned, and they resumed seeing each other, it seemed completely likely that Seth could walk in on them kissing or spooning or whatever. After all, wasn't Marissa just trying to find a skirt at her old house? What if Seth was looking for something he had left behind in Summer's house, what then?

And he really didn't want to have to calm Seth down afterwards. He didn't want to think about Seth's reaction. He was already familiar with the bitter taste of betrayal, especially from the Oliver incident, and he didn't want Seth to have to go through the same thing. Wasn't Ryan man enough to face his fears and problems? Was he man enough to face his 'brother', his best friend in the whole world, the person who trusted him the most… and tell him that he not only liked Summer, but the feeling was mutual?

The answer was no.

Ryan always knew that he was a coward. Sure, he was a man, in the sense that he had slept around a lot, had boozed himself senseless before, and had smoked/snorted/injected so much narcotics in his body, he was surprised that he was still standing. But he wasn't a man. That term should be reserved for people like Sandy, who took a chance on a criminal and welcomed him into his household. Ryan was still a kid, a boy who ran away from all of his problems, just like he ran away from Chino, his family, and his screwed up life. And now he was going to have to do some more running.

He and Summer had felt that they had both grown up somewhat, but… well, it was obvious, wasn't it? Her Chrismukkah present, a gerbil, supposedly giving it to her in some act of mushy affection – it was really so that she wouldn't have to feel so alone in her own house. And they both knew that their hesitation to reveal their relationship to Seth and Marissa was in part due to their own fears that everyone else, including their best friends, would abandon them. It was true that they had each other, but they were only human.

So, no. They still had a long way to go before they could consider themselves 'grown up', despite how mature everyone else considered them to be. In reality, they had been two scared little children clinging to each other for support. Ryan didn't know whether that had changed at all in the past two months, but it would certainly be tested.

He shook these harsh thoughts from his mind when Seth entered the pool house, all smiles. That was a good sign. Right?

"Hey, compadre! What's up? You're looking a bit down. Did you have your spinach today yet, Popeye?"

"What?" Ryan held his hands up in defeat. "Okay, I'm not even going to go there."

"Tsk, now, I thought I gave you a comic reading list. Please don't tell me that you used it as bedding for your new furry friend over there." Seth gestured towards the cage sitting atop the counter. "Where'd you get it?"

"Oh, uh… just petsitting. It's Summer's… she's in New York right now, remember?" Ryan answered, berating himself for not realizing sooner how suspicious that sounded.

Seth quirked an eyebrow. "So now you have a petsitting service? Feel bad for all those poor orphaned lobsters you killed with your last job at the Crab Shack?"

"Yeah. I'm thinking of joining PETA," Ryan replied dryly.

Seth placed a hand over his heart. "You wound me with your sarcasm, Ryan," he declared, feigning hurt.

The other boy rolled his eyes. "Please."

"Anyway. So I was walking through the kitchen – wait, you were mean to me. You don't get to hear this tidbit."

Ryan gave Seth a dubious look, silently counting down to the inevitable. Five. Four. Three. Two. One –

"Okay, okay, I won't let you suffer. Anyway, Dad was on the phone with Jimmy and apparently Marissa's upset about something. Something that you did. My spider sense is tingling, and it's telling me that there's a story involved here." Seth wiggled his fingers, pointing them at Ryan. "See? Spider sense. Now spill."

"I just returned her present, that's all," he muttered.

"What? I'm shocked, man. Why would you return a present, given in the spirit of Chrismukkah? I thought Operation Chrismukkah was successful, and I had converted you already. Oh Jesus and Moses, please don't tell me you're an atheist now."

"It's not that. It was just too expensive. I just thought that it was… inappropriate." He shrugged. Ryan Atwood, the master of understatement.

"Big word for a big question, Ryan. I mean, I thought you and her were still… you know, close." He held up crossed fingers. "Wait, are you guys still close? Did I miss the memo while I was gone?" he gasped, a bit too dramatically, and Ryan rolled his eyes again.

"Keep that up and you'll wear them out, you know."

Ryan let out a sigh of exasperation. "You missed a lot this summer. And no, I don't think we'll be getting back together."

"Is this about the Oliver thing? Because I thought he was all locked up in the looney bin by now."

"No… I've just… I've moved on."

"Really? Well, that makes one of us." Seth looked straight at Ryan, finally serious for once. "I mean, I think…" he began hesitatingly. "I think I may want to try asking Summer for a re-do."

"A what?" Ryan panicked. Oh please, don't let it be what he thought it was.

"A re-do. Like, try the whole relationship thing again."

Ryan chose his words carefully. "I don't know if that's such a good idea, man…"

"What? Why not?"

That was a very good question. A very good question indeed. He glanced over at the cage on the countertop. He noted Chino's state of calmness and seclusion, how it was so different from the inner turmoil and indecisions Ryan was facing right now.

Damn. He was pretty fucked up if he was jealous of a gerbil.