Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Joss does
and I probably won't get my hands on them legally any time soon.
It's certainly not the night for Slaying, I think to myself as I settle in against a cold marble headstone, bored with walking, stalking, and swinging waiting for any sign of vamps, demons or the like. The whole night is just not going well. First I trip over the mat on the front porch of my house and tumble down the stairs, then I get mud all over my self when I fall into a enormous puddle and tear a hole in my jacket with my stake. Maybe it's like Friday the 13th or something. No, only Thursday and it's the 7th. Who knows, maybe Thursday the 7th is the Buffy Summers bad luck day. Luckily it's really not that terrible of a night weather wise, balmy yet not horrendously humid, and the stars. Oh god these stars are beautiful, the thousands upon thousands of them hanging there looking down upon me. Somebody once said that all of our yesterdays, every single one since the day we were born is stored up there. Glistening and just waiting for someone to stumble upon it and reveal it all over again. If time travel was possible it would be there, hidden in the depths of space where no one has been, just waiting for us all to go and claim the stars as our own. The past as our own, and yet it amazes me, if indeed a star holds our past, how I would love to see mine. I pull at the grass with my fingers and nibble on the ends of the clover that I find, it's sweet and I wonder if many people know it. I really have got a lot on my mind, and although I've been trying to suppress it, so far at least, it hasn't seemed to work.
Two days ago I was watching Passions with Dawn and Spike, what a stupid show, well, it honestly wasn't that bad, I only uphold that opinion in public. Can't have people thinking I'm a teenybopper soap opera fan now can I? I wonder when it was that Dawn and Spike started getting so close and think that maybe, just maybe, if she weren't my little sister I'd be a little jealous. Yes, I have feelings for Spike; I admitted that to myself a long time ago but wouldn't do anything about it. I can't tell anyone, they would all certainly freak out at the thought of Spike and I together. The Scoobies all hate Spike, which I guess is understandable from a certain view point, but then again, I got over Spikes stupid past behavior, I wish they could too. Dawn probably would be happy about it but I don't want to give her hope for something that will never happen, and Spike, oh Spike, he's completely amazingly perfect for me, in every way but every way if that makes sense. We fight all of the time, even if that fighting leads to other so much more desirable things half of the time. We're always making little vocal jabs at each other. Not that I mind it that much. He's got these annoying nicknames for everyone. Pet, Luv, Nibblet, Slayer, Watcher, etc, etc, that actually I have kind of grown to love. Not to say it wouldn't be nice if he could use normal names every once in awhile. I can't help but smile while thinking of him but shake my head in remembrance at the thought of Angel. What was the one bad thing about Angel? He got all happy, yes, my fault I fully admit for making him feel complete, and tried to kill everyone. Well, not everyone, just my friends, family, and well, I certainly don't need that happening again. That's the only reason I can't get involved with Spike, sure he didn't have a soul to begin with, and I'm not sure if anything could happen to cause him to go all psycho, but I can't put them all in that position again. It's only too bad that there isn't some other way.
I've picked all of the grass that I can reach from where I'm sitting and figure that I've had enough Slaying for one night. I've been out for 3 hours and have only dusted 2 vamps. The first one being so stupid that I could have handed him the stake and he would have killed himself and the second one just slow. It's amazing how some nights I can come out here and it's buzzing with unlife and other nights I can walk around for hours and see nothing. I wonder what the determining factor for vampires is regarding if you go out or stay in? Is there some secret vampire and demon code that only they know about? Okay, fifteen of you can go out on Tuesdays, six on Wednesdays, two on Thursdays and forty on Saturdays; I mimic reading from the imaginary vampire demon guideline book. I am soon standing in front of Spikes crypt without even knowing really how or why I walked in this direction. It isn't exactly the fastest way out of the cemetery and I secretly hope he'll open the door as I walk past to invite me in but I won't just go in, no I promise myself that I won't be the first one to make a move. I can almost imagine him on the other side of that door sprawled across that secondhand armchair half naked and I shiver, yep, I need to go soon before I end up begging him to let me touch that beautiful body of his.
Ah, something to finally do, a couple of vamps have somehow gotten a hold of a woman and are tearing at her clothes. Thank god for Spider senses because mine tingles just long enough for me to spin around at the approach of another baddie and dust him before he even knows what has happened. The other two are now looking up from their would be prey obviously a little miffed at my sudden appearance. I love this moment, when they know that I am going to stop them dead in their tracks. The expressions on their faces are priceless. I've heard of these two vamps before, not just cold blooded killers, but perverted killers; raping their victims before draining them. I've seen what's been left of their little sex toy snacks before and it isn't pretty. What I can't exactly figure though is why this woman would be in the cemetery at midnight. Ok, the stupid vamp I dusted earlier is no longer the most idiotic of the night, this woman gets the title hands down because now she's slapping the leader of the two repetitively trying to win her release. At this point lady, I think as I approach, I don't think slapping the big bad vampire is going to help you much.
"You two again? I should have known that you'd be out trying to piss me off somehow."
"Well Slayer, I was afraid you weren't going to show." The leader of the two took a step forward, temporarily forgetting his prey and allowing the woman to escape. I watch her pull her torn clothes regally around her and sidestep her captors. The lesser of the vampire's watches greedily as his departing meal runs sobbing down the line of crypts and headstones. He turns angrily back to face me, mad that I took away his one chance at feeding for the night. Hell, by the look in his eyes, he seems to know that there won't be another chance ever again for him to feed.
"I'm really rather crushed," I begin, cutting a slow half circle around the undead pair, juggling the stake between my two hands. "You didn't invite me to your little snack party."
"What fun would that have been? Of course if you really want to join our 'snack party'" he emphasized the words dryly "I'm sure it could be arranged" he licked his lips in one final gesture, making sure to show the brilliant white fangs beneath.
"You know as much fun as this is, our little chit chatting" I continued now bored with the conversation and ready to get on to a little action, "I think I'd rather just get it over with so will you just attack me already?"
So perhaps this wasn't the best idea to just jump into a fight without gauging my adversaries first, because now I'm here on the ground lying in one of the vamps ashes and being pressed every more intently down by the other vampire. I still can't exactly figure out how I got in this position, one minute I'm kicking the shit out of him and a couple seconds later I'm without stake, hands held above my head and defenselessly being choked. Yeah Thursday the 7th is definitely the new Buffy bad day, I think to myself and suddenly realize I probably should stop trying to fight. I'm not getting anywhere and I'm losing a lot of oxygen, fast. I think I'm going to need all of the air I have left just to think of a way out of this. This joke of a vampire should never have been able to get the upper hand and I wonder what happened. Fighting, fighting, boom, being choked. Oh well, will have time to think of that later, for now how am I ever going to get out of this. I don't want to be killed by a vampire that's probably not even twenty years old. Not that I want to die at all, but I certainly don't want to be killed by some inexperienced youngster. I survived the Master, so I can survive this right? Right?
"Looks like I'm gonna kill me a Slayer. You know what they say about Slayer blood right? Sweet, powerful, better than any other blood in the world."
"Wouldn't...bet...it."
Shit, my lungs are starting to burn, like fire growing inside of me and I close my eyes only to find that I am now unable to re-open them. I need to think of something, anything, but my mind if fuzzy like I've had too many drinks and I can't function. My body is starting to convulse and I try to fight once again, but there is nothing left to fuel my muscles and I will my arms and legs to move but they do not, they will not. I can feel the unmistakable feel of his lips against my skin and the tugging of sharp teeth as they strain against my neck. Soon my blood will be flowing freely through him and I can only hope that he will loosen his grip and give me a chance to escape. No air, not thoughts, not noise, no...Vampire? The weight is gone from my throat but I am still unable to move although I take in a much-needed breath. The night air feels cool and wet in my lungs and I listen as what sounds like an argument goes on overhead. Slowly my senses are coming back to me, first my touch as I can feel the hard ground below me, then I can smell the grass and dirt of the graveyard once again and I never thought anything would smell so good. It's quieter now, nothing but the sounds of the frogs and the crickets off in the distance and of course my loud coughing from the lack of air.
"Oh Bloody Hell"
I hear the familiar voice above me and open my eyes to see Spike frowning down at me. I have never been so glad to see him in my life and I take the hand offered to me and pull myself up to meet him, clinging to him for support and I immediately embrace him. Our bodies fit perfectly together as I hold him close, still coughing every once and again, and not very strong on my feet yet, but so incredibly happy to just hold him. Minutes later, as soon as I can breathe steadily once again he pulls away from me.
"What was your goal tonight Slayer? Was it to die? Cause you almost did." He takes his hand from mine and we start walking.
"Oh Spike, relax," the moment has passed and I'm no longer able to rely on him for support, and unhappily it seems we're back to out war of words. "I was just about to charm him with my feminine wiles."
"I'm sure you were" he's angry with me I can tell and I can't imagine why. Well, I guess my lack of fighting skills, for whatever reason, would do it. I watch him pull the pack of cigarettes from his pocket and spark one instantly. If only he wouldn't smoke, well, maybe I'll have to work on him regarding that.
"Well Spike, at least you'll never have to worry about Cigarettes killing you."
That's it? Why can't I come up with anything better to say than that? Well, I think it's because I just don't want to fight. I wish I could just say Spike, lets go back to your crypt and make love. Yeah, that's really the most romantic line of the year, I roll my eyes at the thought. Let's go back to your CRYPT and make love? Okay Buffy, whatever.
"Very funny pet, aren't you just the hilarious one tonight" he snorts in return "not that you aren't a riot all of the damn time." He pauses to consider himself and I wonder what it is that he is thinking. "Then again," he finally continues and I get my answer "of course it could just be the incredible lack of oxygen." He laughs at the comment and I can't help but think of how innocently sarcastic he is.
"Was there something that you wanted?" this should get a rise out of him I think to myself as he stops dead in his tracks.
"Wanted? WANTED? I saved your life back there luv, you should be showering me with thanks for that. A minute more and you'd have been an ex- slayer."
There's a tinge of anger in his voice and I can't help but chuckle at him getting so worked up over something so stupid. We've been walking side by side now for a little while, clearly in the general direction of his crypt, and I really don't seem to have the best balance right now because I keep stumbling but thankfully he's there to always prop me back up. I can see his face in the moonlight and I think once again of how easy it would be for me to just tackle him to the ground and go at it right here and now. He's always the same, that mop of bleached blond hair, the sharp lines of his face, those sick smiles of his that are so irritatingly annoying but yet at the same time always so perfect. The same old Spike I've always known and in the beginning hated. The same old Spike that I love so much at this very moment. I bring my self from my thoughts with a yawn.
"Thanks for saving me" I finally put forth although he doesn't seem to respond and so I try another jab "I see you've been following me around again"
Well," he starts as he pulls the crypt door open and motions for me to get inside. "Someone bloody well had to, you see the trouble that you get yourself into. And if I may ask, how in hells name did you get into that little problem back there? Hmm?"
I continue to stand in front of Spikes home, considering taking him up on the offer of joining him inside but knowing that it would lead to things that shouldn't be led to. He's standing there; glowing in the moonlight with his duster draped over one arm and his hands resting on his sides. I can't help but trace a path from his face down to his arms and chest, further down to his abs and... Okay, Buffy! I snap back up to catch a slight smile on his face that I know all too well and finally I just shake my head, knowing what that smile leads to.
"I.." I stutter "I've got to get to the Bronze. Willow, Tara and Xander are um..Waiting."
It's not a complete lie; they should still be there, although technically they aren't waiting for me I guess I could make an appearance. I have really got to stop thinking about Spike that way one of these days. Not that I don't want to think of him that way, it's just not safe to think of him that way. Those types of thoughts get me into trouble. It also wouldn't hurt to get some sleep either, maybe that's part of the problem.
"Well, your loss, I've got a bottle of some cheap whiskey and a full three hours worth of chick flicks. You're welcome to stay luv, you know that."
"Or, you can come to the Bronze with me, if you want to." I add but don't really know why. He probably won't except and then I'll just feel rejected. I'm not even sure I want Spike there, after all things have happened between us at the Bronze in the past and surely could happen again. I'm surrounded by memories. Well at least you could never say we had a dull sex life. I smile to myself and am surprised when he closes the door and turns to face me.
"Ok Slayer, you've got a date."
**************************************************************************** **********
It's strange like I can almost feel her outside my crypt even though I know that she isn't there. I can imagine her there, standing in the dark wishing for me to open the door to her, wishing for me to take her in my arms and make love to her. For a second I almost believe my own fantasies that she is there, just waiting on the other side of that old metal barrier and I allow myself stupidly to go to the door and throw it open. Yep, just as I expected no one there but the other dead residents of Sunnyhell, I should have known better, I shouldn't have let my mind run like that. It's when I'm thinking that deeply that I get into trouble, so I close the door, well, slam the door is more like it, and retreat back to my favorite chair. Sure it's seen its better days and unlike soda; blood, when spilled on fabric isn't that easy to get out, but I love it just the same. I throw myself into the broken down piece of furniture, hanging myself upon it like an old coat just tossed aside. Sure, that's what I am. A man tossed aside only picked up when something is needed from me, like money from the coat pocket, except for I'm something like the fighting sex coat. No, that didn't quite make sense. Well, I guess in my own mind it did. What am I needed for besides to fight along side the stupid Scoobies and for Buffy's sexual tension. The second, I have to say that while I wish things could be different between she and I, I'd take anything she'd throw at me. Any crumb at all, and sexual crumbs are graciously accepted. I take another long draw from my cheap bottle of whiskey, following with a pull from my fag. This, I think to myself, will probably be the extent of my night. Oh lucky me.
It's been an hour and I seem to be getting on a pretty good buzz by now, drinking games just aren't as fun when there's only one person involved. Sure you get drunk a lot quicker but other then that there's not many high points. I feel like fighting and so it's a wonder when I hear someone screaming for help not so far away. Something to do, finally, so I pull myself from the chair and head to the door but it's not soon before I realize that I am probably going to be needing a shirt at some point and so I grab one before pulling the door shut behind me. A fight is just what I need to clear my mind; put my life into some perspective, well; basically just have a little fun. There's a woman running my way at a fairly great speed and I don't think she sees me and so I think I'll just scare her a little bit. However as she nears me I can tell that she's already been terrified enough for one night and probably doesn't need little ol' me jumping out of the bushes at her. Wouldn't do anything to hurt her, just give her a good jolt. I second guess my plan and let her pass me by unscathed. There's still signs of a fight that I can hear up ahead but I am in no real hurry to get there, I'll have my fun, I figure and secretly wonder if the Slayer has already beat me too it. No, can't be because I can hear a heart beat that's slowly lessening and it certainly wouldn't be Buffy. Too bad, I was rather looking forward to meeting her tonight.
What I see when I finally turn the corner freezes me mid stride. I'd recognize my slayer anywhere and she's certainly, by the sound of the weak heartbeat, not doing overly well. The vampire holding her looks up at me but continues to press himself upon my slayer and I let a growl escape from my throat warning him that he has one chance to let her go but he decides that I'm not a threat and doesn't heed my warning. Must be new in town, you don't mess with me if you know who I am. You just don't mess with William the Bloody. Moments later I am upon him, tearing him from the Slayer and throwing him a good twelve feet only to watch him bounce off of a think granite statue and come racing back at me. Little bastard, certainly a fighter, but not that strong and I wonder how he got the upper hand over Buffy. He's fast though and I catch a blow to my face before pummeling him into the dirt. Of course I wouldn't have brought a stake, I was a little put off that in my drunken state I hadn't even thought to bring one, but certainly far form drunk now I immediately shift to game face. There are other ways for Vampires to kill Vampires and although just draining him wont do it, draining him and leaving him to watch the sunrise will. Immediately my fangs are in his neck and soon he is too weak to even pull away. I leave him lying in the grass unconscious and run to Buffy's side.
"Oh bloody hell"
Her eyes open at the sound of my voice and I am glad that she is at least strong enough to move. I don't know much about being choked seeing as how I've never been so myself, but she finally is able to take my hand and I pull her to her feet. Her arms are immediately around me and I can't help but pull her closer to me and breathe her in. She smells so wonderful, Vanilla and Lavender as always and I can't but take a second to press my face into her golden locks. So soft and clean and well, a little bit full of grass and dirt but still so beautiful. Finally I am just hugging her, holding her tightly and amazingly she doesn't pull away. If I could choose one moment to live in forever it would be this one, alone with my slayer. In the perfect world of course I would be able to lift her in my arms, carry her the couple hundred feet back to the crypt, lay her down and make sweet love to her for the rest of my life never letting her go at all. I probably shouldn't be thinking about this now because I can see it is having some affects on me physically. Being this close to her and all, so regretfully I pull away before something happens to ruin this perfect moment. Instantly I'm angry with her for almost getting killed and I can't help but voice my opinion. I'm angry because had I not came out to fight, she wouldn't have lived though the night. I'm angry because I almost lost her.
"What was your goal tonight? Was it to die? Because you almost did?"
Probably not the best way to start off the conversation, and yes of course now things are not all lovey dovey between us, they're strained as we bicker back and forth like we usually do. Can't we just stop for one minute? She counters my question with some sarcastic comment or other and it goes on as such, not angry sarcasm thank god, but what seems like a sad attempt at joking flirtatious sarcasm from the both of us. What is this world coming to when a bad ass vampire like myself flirts with a slayer? Well, there's something, at least she's thanking me for saving her life. Well, she should be, I held her life in my hands all I had to do was ignore her and that would be another Slayers life gone due to me in some part. No, who am I kidding? I wouldn't never hurt her or allow her to be hurt by another. Killing the Slayer this time isn't in my best interest, I love her way too much.
We've reached my crypt and I wonder if she realizes that she is the one that led us here. Probably not, I'll probably catch hell for even suggesting that she come in but I do it anyway and strangely, there's no reply. She looks to be deep in thought and I can only wonder what she's thinking about. No, I think I've got a pretty good idea of where her mind is as I watch her scan me ever so slowly. Her eyes reach my waist and I'm praying to god that she'll either go further with her perusal or just come in so that I can go a little further with mine. Suddenly she jerks her eyes back up to my face and I can't help but smirk a little. She was checking me out and it was clearly obvious that she was enjoying it. I get way too excited over these little crumbs that she throws my way and I wonder what will happen now that I caught her in the act. Maybe a fight? A couple careless words thrown around between us? I once again invite her in, this time verbally instead of just the motion, in case she somehow missed the previous invitation but she declines. Damn it. I even tried to make it sound a bit appealing, a bit of wine, well, whiskey...maybe a chick flick or two? Light porn could be considered a chick flick couldn't it? Maybe it's best if she doesn't come in, even if things happen between us I'll only wake up alone tomorrow. Wait? Did she just say she wanted me to go to the Bronze with her? No, she wouldn't ask me to go with her to meet her friends at the Bronze. Not that I so much want to see the wanker you understand, and the witches would be okay, but she's just throwing out crumbs like crazy tonight and I do a sort of mental double take before accepting her invitation and pulling the door closed once again.
It's certainly not the night for Slaying, I think to myself as I settle in against a cold marble headstone, bored with walking, stalking, and swinging waiting for any sign of vamps, demons or the like. The whole night is just not going well. First I trip over the mat on the front porch of my house and tumble down the stairs, then I get mud all over my self when I fall into a enormous puddle and tear a hole in my jacket with my stake. Maybe it's like Friday the 13th or something. No, only Thursday and it's the 7th. Who knows, maybe Thursday the 7th is the Buffy Summers bad luck day. Luckily it's really not that terrible of a night weather wise, balmy yet not horrendously humid, and the stars. Oh god these stars are beautiful, the thousands upon thousands of them hanging there looking down upon me. Somebody once said that all of our yesterdays, every single one since the day we were born is stored up there. Glistening and just waiting for someone to stumble upon it and reveal it all over again. If time travel was possible it would be there, hidden in the depths of space where no one has been, just waiting for us all to go and claim the stars as our own. The past as our own, and yet it amazes me, if indeed a star holds our past, how I would love to see mine. I pull at the grass with my fingers and nibble on the ends of the clover that I find, it's sweet and I wonder if many people know it. I really have got a lot on my mind, and although I've been trying to suppress it, so far at least, it hasn't seemed to work.
Two days ago I was watching Passions with Dawn and Spike, what a stupid show, well, it honestly wasn't that bad, I only uphold that opinion in public. Can't have people thinking I'm a teenybopper soap opera fan now can I? I wonder when it was that Dawn and Spike started getting so close and think that maybe, just maybe, if she weren't my little sister I'd be a little jealous. Yes, I have feelings for Spike; I admitted that to myself a long time ago but wouldn't do anything about it. I can't tell anyone, they would all certainly freak out at the thought of Spike and I together. The Scoobies all hate Spike, which I guess is understandable from a certain view point, but then again, I got over Spikes stupid past behavior, I wish they could too. Dawn probably would be happy about it but I don't want to give her hope for something that will never happen, and Spike, oh Spike, he's completely amazingly perfect for me, in every way but every way if that makes sense. We fight all of the time, even if that fighting leads to other so much more desirable things half of the time. We're always making little vocal jabs at each other. Not that I mind it that much. He's got these annoying nicknames for everyone. Pet, Luv, Nibblet, Slayer, Watcher, etc, etc, that actually I have kind of grown to love. Not to say it wouldn't be nice if he could use normal names every once in awhile. I can't help but smile while thinking of him but shake my head in remembrance at the thought of Angel. What was the one bad thing about Angel? He got all happy, yes, my fault I fully admit for making him feel complete, and tried to kill everyone. Well, not everyone, just my friends, family, and well, I certainly don't need that happening again. That's the only reason I can't get involved with Spike, sure he didn't have a soul to begin with, and I'm not sure if anything could happen to cause him to go all psycho, but I can't put them all in that position again. It's only too bad that there isn't some other way.
I've picked all of the grass that I can reach from where I'm sitting and figure that I've had enough Slaying for one night. I've been out for 3 hours and have only dusted 2 vamps. The first one being so stupid that I could have handed him the stake and he would have killed himself and the second one just slow. It's amazing how some nights I can come out here and it's buzzing with unlife and other nights I can walk around for hours and see nothing. I wonder what the determining factor for vampires is regarding if you go out or stay in? Is there some secret vampire and demon code that only they know about? Okay, fifteen of you can go out on Tuesdays, six on Wednesdays, two on Thursdays and forty on Saturdays; I mimic reading from the imaginary vampire demon guideline book. I am soon standing in front of Spikes crypt without even knowing really how or why I walked in this direction. It isn't exactly the fastest way out of the cemetery and I secretly hope he'll open the door as I walk past to invite me in but I won't just go in, no I promise myself that I won't be the first one to make a move. I can almost imagine him on the other side of that door sprawled across that secondhand armchair half naked and I shiver, yep, I need to go soon before I end up begging him to let me touch that beautiful body of his.
Ah, something to finally do, a couple of vamps have somehow gotten a hold of a woman and are tearing at her clothes. Thank god for Spider senses because mine tingles just long enough for me to spin around at the approach of another baddie and dust him before he even knows what has happened. The other two are now looking up from their would be prey obviously a little miffed at my sudden appearance. I love this moment, when they know that I am going to stop them dead in their tracks. The expressions on their faces are priceless. I've heard of these two vamps before, not just cold blooded killers, but perverted killers; raping their victims before draining them. I've seen what's been left of their little sex toy snacks before and it isn't pretty. What I can't exactly figure though is why this woman would be in the cemetery at midnight. Ok, the stupid vamp I dusted earlier is no longer the most idiotic of the night, this woman gets the title hands down because now she's slapping the leader of the two repetitively trying to win her release. At this point lady, I think as I approach, I don't think slapping the big bad vampire is going to help you much.
"You two again? I should have known that you'd be out trying to piss me off somehow."
"Well Slayer, I was afraid you weren't going to show." The leader of the two took a step forward, temporarily forgetting his prey and allowing the woman to escape. I watch her pull her torn clothes regally around her and sidestep her captors. The lesser of the vampire's watches greedily as his departing meal runs sobbing down the line of crypts and headstones. He turns angrily back to face me, mad that I took away his one chance at feeding for the night. Hell, by the look in his eyes, he seems to know that there won't be another chance ever again for him to feed.
"I'm really rather crushed," I begin, cutting a slow half circle around the undead pair, juggling the stake between my two hands. "You didn't invite me to your little snack party."
"What fun would that have been? Of course if you really want to join our 'snack party'" he emphasized the words dryly "I'm sure it could be arranged" he licked his lips in one final gesture, making sure to show the brilliant white fangs beneath.
"You know as much fun as this is, our little chit chatting" I continued now bored with the conversation and ready to get on to a little action, "I think I'd rather just get it over with so will you just attack me already?"
So perhaps this wasn't the best idea to just jump into a fight without gauging my adversaries first, because now I'm here on the ground lying in one of the vamps ashes and being pressed every more intently down by the other vampire. I still can't exactly figure out how I got in this position, one minute I'm kicking the shit out of him and a couple seconds later I'm without stake, hands held above my head and defenselessly being choked. Yeah Thursday the 7th is definitely the new Buffy bad day, I think to myself and suddenly realize I probably should stop trying to fight. I'm not getting anywhere and I'm losing a lot of oxygen, fast. I think I'm going to need all of the air I have left just to think of a way out of this. This joke of a vampire should never have been able to get the upper hand and I wonder what happened. Fighting, fighting, boom, being choked. Oh well, will have time to think of that later, for now how am I ever going to get out of this. I don't want to be killed by a vampire that's probably not even twenty years old. Not that I want to die at all, but I certainly don't want to be killed by some inexperienced youngster. I survived the Master, so I can survive this right? Right?
"Looks like I'm gonna kill me a Slayer. You know what they say about Slayer blood right? Sweet, powerful, better than any other blood in the world."
"Wouldn't...bet...it."
Shit, my lungs are starting to burn, like fire growing inside of me and I close my eyes only to find that I am now unable to re-open them. I need to think of something, anything, but my mind if fuzzy like I've had too many drinks and I can't function. My body is starting to convulse and I try to fight once again, but there is nothing left to fuel my muscles and I will my arms and legs to move but they do not, they will not. I can feel the unmistakable feel of his lips against my skin and the tugging of sharp teeth as they strain against my neck. Soon my blood will be flowing freely through him and I can only hope that he will loosen his grip and give me a chance to escape. No air, not thoughts, not noise, no...Vampire? The weight is gone from my throat but I am still unable to move although I take in a much-needed breath. The night air feels cool and wet in my lungs and I listen as what sounds like an argument goes on overhead. Slowly my senses are coming back to me, first my touch as I can feel the hard ground below me, then I can smell the grass and dirt of the graveyard once again and I never thought anything would smell so good. It's quieter now, nothing but the sounds of the frogs and the crickets off in the distance and of course my loud coughing from the lack of air.
"Oh Bloody Hell"
I hear the familiar voice above me and open my eyes to see Spike frowning down at me. I have never been so glad to see him in my life and I take the hand offered to me and pull myself up to meet him, clinging to him for support and I immediately embrace him. Our bodies fit perfectly together as I hold him close, still coughing every once and again, and not very strong on my feet yet, but so incredibly happy to just hold him. Minutes later, as soon as I can breathe steadily once again he pulls away from me.
"What was your goal tonight Slayer? Was it to die? Cause you almost did." He takes his hand from mine and we start walking.
"Oh Spike, relax," the moment has passed and I'm no longer able to rely on him for support, and unhappily it seems we're back to out war of words. "I was just about to charm him with my feminine wiles."
"I'm sure you were" he's angry with me I can tell and I can't imagine why. Well, I guess my lack of fighting skills, for whatever reason, would do it. I watch him pull the pack of cigarettes from his pocket and spark one instantly. If only he wouldn't smoke, well, maybe I'll have to work on him regarding that.
"Well Spike, at least you'll never have to worry about Cigarettes killing you."
That's it? Why can't I come up with anything better to say than that? Well, I think it's because I just don't want to fight. I wish I could just say Spike, lets go back to your crypt and make love. Yeah, that's really the most romantic line of the year, I roll my eyes at the thought. Let's go back to your CRYPT and make love? Okay Buffy, whatever.
"Very funny pet, aren't you just the hilarious one tonight" he snorts in return "not that you aren't a riot all of the damn time." He pauses to consider himself and I wonder what it is that he is thinking. "Then again," he finally continues and I get my answer "of course it could just be the incredible lack of oxygen." He laughs at the comment and I can't help but think of how innocently sarcastic he is.
"Was there something that you wanted?" this should get a rise out of him I think to myself as he stops dead in his tracks.
"Wanted? WANTED? I saved your life back there luv, you should be showering me with thanks for that. A minute more and you'd have been an ex- slayer."
There's a tinge of anger in his voice and I can't help but chuckle at him getting so worked up over something so stupid. We've been walking side by side now for a little while, clearly in the general direction of his crypt, and I really don't seem to have the best balance right now because I keep stumbling but thankfully he's there to always prop me back up. I can see his face in the moonlight and I think once again of how easy it would be for me to just tackle him to the ground and go at it right here and now. He's always the same, that mop of bleached blond hair, the sharp lines of his face, those sick smiles of his that are so irritatingly annoying but yet at the same time always so perfect. The same old Spike I've always known and in the beginning hated. The same old Spike that I love so much at this very moment. I bring my self from my thoughts with a yawn.
"Thanks for saving me" I finally put forth although he doesn't seem to respond and so I try another jab "I see you've been following me around again"
Well," he starts as he pulls the crypt door open and motions for me to get inside. "Someone bloody well had to, you see the trouble that you get yourself into. And if I may ask, how in hells name did you get into that little problem back there? Hmm?"
I continue to stand in front of Spikes home, considering taking him up on the offer of joining him inside but knowing that it would lead to things that shouldn't be led to. He's standing there; glowing in the moonlight with his duster draped over one arm and his hands resting on his sides. I can't help but trace a path from his face down to his arms and chest, further down to his abs and... Okay, Buffy! I snap back up to catch a slight smile on his face that I know all too well and finally I just shake my head, knowing what that smile leads to.
"I.." I stutter "I've got to get to the Bronze. Willow, Tara and Xander are um..Waiting."
It's not a complete lie; they should still be there, although technically they aren't waiting for me I guess I could make an appearance. I have really got to stop thinking about Spike that way one of these days. Not that I don't want to think of him that way, it's just not safe to think of him that way. Those types of thoughts get me into trouble. It also wouldn't hurt to get some sleep either, maybe that's part of the problem.
"Well, your loss, I've got a bottle of some cheap whiskey and a full three hours worth of chick flicks. You're welcome to stay luv, you know that."
"Or, you can come to the Bronze with me, if you want to." I add but don't really know why. He probably won't except and then I'll just feel rejected. I'm not even sure I want Spike there, after all things have happened between us at the Bronze in the past and surely could happen again. I'm surrounded by memories. Well at least you could never say we had a dull sex life. I smile to myself and am surprised when he closes the door and turns to face me.
"Ok Slayer, you've got a date."
**************************************************************************** **********
It's strange like I can almost feel her outside my crypt even though I know that she isn't there. I can imagine her there, standing in the dark wishing for me to open the door to her, wishing for me to take her in my arms and make love to her. For a second I almost believe my own fantasies that she is there, just waiting on the other side of that old metal barrier and I allow myself stupidly to go to the door and throw it open. Yep, just as I expected no one there but the other dead residents of Sunnyhell, I should have known better, I shouldn't have let my mind run like that. It's when I'm thinking that deeply that I get into trouble, so I close the door, well, slam the door is more like it, and retreat back to my favorite chair. Sure it's seen its better days and unlike soda; blood, when spilled on fabric isn't that easy to get out, but I love it just the same. I throw myself into the broken down piece of furniture, hanging myself upon it like an old coat just tossed aside. Sure, that's what I am. A man tossed aside only picked up when something is needed from me, like money from the coat pocket, except for I'm something like the fighting sex coat. No, that didn't quite make sense. Well, I guess in my own mind it did. What am I needed for besides to fight along side the stupid Scoobies and for Buffy's sexual tension. The second, I have to say that while I wish things could be different between she and I, I'd take anything she'd throw at me. Any crumb at all, and sexual crumbs are graciously accepted. I take another long draw from my cheap bottle of whiskey, following with a pull from my fag. This, I think to myself, will probably be the extent of my night. Oh lucky me.
It's been an hour and I seem to be getting on a pretty good buzz by now, drinking games just aren't as fun when there's only one person involved. Sure you get drunk a lot quicker but other then that there's not many high points. I feel like fighting and so it's a wonder when I hear someone screaming for help not so far away. Something to do, finally, so I pull myself from the chair and head to the door but it's not soon before I realize that I am probably going to be needing a shirt at some point and so I grab one before pulling the door shut behind me. A fight is just what I need to clear my mind; put my life into some perspective, well; basically just have a little fun. There's a woman running my way at a fairly great speed and I don't think she sees me and so I think I'll just scare her a little bit. However as she nears me I can tell that she's already been terrified enough for one night and probably doesn't need little ol' me jumping out of the bushes at her. Wouldn't do anything to hurt her, just give her a good jolt. I second guess my plan and let her pass me by unscathed. There's still signs of a fight that I can hear up ahead but I am in no real hurry to get there, I'll have my fun, I figure and secretly wonder if the Slayer has already beat me too it. No, can't be because I can hear a heart beat that's slowly lessening and it certainly wouldn't be Buffy. Too bad, I was rather looking forward to meeting her tonight.
What I see when I finally turn the corner freezes me mid stride. I'd recognize my slayer anywhere and she's certainly, by the sound of the weak heartbeat, not doing overly well. The vampire holding her looks up at me but continues to press himself upon my slayer and I let a growl escape from my throat warning him that he has one chance to let her go but he decides that I'm not a threat and doesn't heed my warning. Must be new in town, you don't mess with me if you know who I am. You just don't mess with William the Bloody. Moments later I am upon him, tearing him from the Slayer and throwing him a good twelve feet only to watch him bounce off of a think granite statue and come racing back at me. Little bastard, certainly a fighter, but not that strong and I wonder how he got the upper hand over Buffy. He's fast though and I catch a blow to my face before pummeling him into the dirt. Of course I wouldn't have brought a stake, I was a little put off that in my drunken state I hadn't even thought to bring one, but certainly far form drunk now I immediately shift to game face. There are other ways for Vampires to kill Vampires and although just draining him wont do it, draining him and leaving him to watch the sunrise will. Immediately my fangs are in his neck and soon he is too weak to even pull away. I leave him lying in the grass unconscious and run to Buffy's side.
"Oh bloody hell"
Her eyes open at the sound of my voice and I am glad that she is at least strong enough to move. I don't know much about being choked seeing as how I've never been so myself, but she finally is able to take my hand and I pull her to her feet. Her arms are immediately around me and I can't help but pull her closer to me and breathe her in. She smells so wonderful, Vanilla and Lavender as always and I can't but take a second to press my face into her golden locks. So soft and clean and well, a little bit full of grass and dirt but still so beautiful. Finally I am just hugging her, holding her tightly and amazingly she doesn't pull away. If I could choose one moment to live in forever it would be this one, alone with my slayer. In the perfect world of course I would be able to lift her in my arms, carry her the couple hundred feet back to the crypt, lay her down and make sweet love to her for the rest of my life never letting her go at all. I probably shouldn't be thinking about this now because I can see it is having some affects on me physically. Being this close to her and all, so regretfully I pull away before something happens to ruin this perfect moment. Instantly I'm angry with her for almost getting killed and I can't help but voice my opinion. I'm angry because had I not came out to fight, she wouldn't have lived though the night. I'm angry because I almost lost her.
"What was your goal tonight? Was it to die? Because you almost did?"
Probably not the best way to start off the conversation, and yes of course now things are not all lovey dovey between us, they're strained as we bicker back and forth like we usually do. Can't we just stop for one minute? She counters my question with some sarcastic comment or other and it goes on as such, not angry sarcasm thank god, but what seems like a sad attempt at joking flirtatious sarcasm from the both of us. What is this world coming to when a bad ass vampire like myself flirts with a slayer? Well, there's something, at least she's thanking me for saving her life. Well, she should be, I held her life in my hands all I had to do was ignore her and that would be another Slayers life gone due to me in some part. No, who am I kidding? I wouldn't never hurt her or allow her to be hurt by another. Killing the Slayer this time isn't in my best interest, I love her way too much.
We've reached my crypt and I wonder if she realizes that she is the one that led us here. Probably not, I'll probably catch hell for even suggesting that she come in but I do it anyway and strangely, there's no reply. She looks to be deep in thought and I can only wonder what she's thinking about. No, I think I've got a pretty good idea of where her mind is as I watch her scan me ever so slowly. Her eyes reach my waist and I'm praying to god that she'll either go further with her perusal or just come in so that I can go a little further with mine. Suddenly she jerks her eyes back up to my face and I can't help but smirk a little. She was checking me out and it was clearly obvious that she was enjoying it. I get way too excited over these little crumbs that she throws my way and I wonder what will happen now that I caught her in the act. Maybe a fight? A couple careless words thrown around between us? I once again invite her in, this time verbally instead of just the motion, in case she somehow missed the previous invitation but she declines. Damn it. I even tried to make it sound a bit appealing, a bit of wine, well, whiskey...maybe a chick flick or two? Light porn could be considered a chick flick couldn't it? Maybe it's best if she doesn't come in, even if things happen between us I'll only wake up alone tomorrow. Wait? Did she just say she wanted me to go to the Bronze with her? No, she wouldn't ask me to go with her to meet her friends at the Bronze. Not that I so much want to see the wanker you understand, and the witches would be okay, but she's just throwing out crumbs like crazy tonight and I do a sort of mental double take before accepting her invitation and pulling the door closed once again.