Chapter Ten: A Mother's Sorrow
Monica and Chandler's
It has been about three months since Rachel's car accident, and the day Ross left. Rachel was completely healed... well, physically, at least. Her heart hadn't just been broken, or shattered into pieces as some people would say. It wasn't smashed by a hammer, or ripped from her chest. Instead, it was isolated, inside a coffin, and it couldn't escape.
All of these thoughts were passing through her mind, as she leaned over Monica and Chandler's deck. Why? That was the puzzling question that seemed to flood her brain. Why had Ross left her? Why had Ross left his children? Why had Ross put her through so much pain? Why? She never even got to tell him... tell him what she had found out that very day.
I guess I'll never know, Rachel thought sadly. She wondered where he was, almost constantly. Maybe he was living life as if nothing had happened. Maybe he was a bum on the streets. Maybe he had met another women, maybe even married her. It wasn't a scary thought, knowing Ross's tendency to walk down the isle. Maybe he had met a new group of friends. Maybe he was still at the park. Maybe he was dead.
Dead. She couldn't imagine Ross... gone, forever. Although she was living without him now, she had always believed that he was safe. But, if she found out he was dead, things would be different. He could never rescue her, come back and love her, make up for all of the things that had happened in the past. Sure, it was a stretch, she knew that. However, for some reason, Rachel felt that someday, he would come back for her. Back for his three children, and of course, his wife.
"Rach, you okay?" asked Chandler, concerned.
"Do you think he'll ever come back for me?" Rachel asked, gazing at the sky.
"I..I don't know, honey. We all hope he will, but, it's just so unrealistic," he replied, sadly.
"Summer misses him, she doesn't understand," Rachel whispered.
"I thought you told her," Chandler said, now confused.
"I did."
Flashback- Two Months Ago
"Mommy! You're home from the hospital! Yay!" Summer squealed, hugging her mother's knees, her favorite tradition.
"Yes, baby, Mommy's here," Rachel replied, scooping up her daughter.
"Where's daddy?" the girl asked, noticing that her father wasn't there.
"He.. he's gone," Rachel coughed, holding back tears.
"When's he coming home?" Summer questioned.
"He. He's not coming back sweetie," Rachel cried, holding her daughter.
End of Flashback
"It'll be okay Rach," Chandler consoled her.
"No, no it won't," Rachel sobbed. No one could understand, only she knew.
Ever since she was a young girl, her father taught her how to keep a secret. And she was exceptionally good at it. I guess things haven't changed, Rachel thought. Even as an adult, she could hide things from people with so much ease. But, in the end, she always felt so guilty.
"Why are you saying that? You know, you'll always have us," Chandler told her.
"I think I need to tell Monica something," Rachel told Chandler, as she walked inside the house.
Monica was washing dishes in the sink. Rachel always seemed to find it funny. Maybe it was because of the huge, rubber gloves that she always wore, or maybe it was just because she was so stubborn. For God's sake, she had a dishwasher!
"Mon, we need to talk," Rachel began.
Monica dropped the dishes, "What is it, honey? Is it something I did? Something I said? 'Cause if it is, I'm so sooo sorry."
"No, it's about me," Rachel stammered, almost panicking.
Rachel took a deep breath, inhaling and exhaling, "I'm having a baby."
"Or, in other words, you're pregnant! Yay! This is..." Monica began, then stopped, as she looked at Rachel's face.
What is WRONG with me, Monica thought. My friend's husband –and my brother – just left, and now she's pregnant with his child. God, why can't I just shut-up sometimes.
"Honey, I'm sorry. I forgot, I just," Monica started.
"I'm 3 ½ months," Rachel said, her face pale.
"God, woman! I'm going to kill you! You have some kind of mental illness, I'm serious! I mean, are you afraid that we're SCARED of you when you're pregnant? Like you suddenly turn into some serial killer? NO, we're not like that. I, for one, am always happy when my best friend finds out she's pregnant..." Monica screamed at the top of her lungs.
"I'm.. I'm so so.r.rry, Mon," Rachel sobbed.
"Oh, God, honey, I've done it again haven't I?" Monica said, upset with herself.
Rachel solemnly nodded her head in reply.
"Hey! I've got an idea... let's watch a movie, just like old times. That'll be sure to cheer us up, right?" Monica suggested.
"Sure, Mon, that sounds great," Rachel replied, as she made her way over to the couch.
After minutes of rummaging through the DVD cabinet (yep, we're too old for VHS), Monica finally found a movie; "Pearl Harbor!"
"I've never seen that, is it good?" Rachel asked curiously.
"It's great, honey. And, I think it'll be good for you. You can really relate to it," Monica told her friend, as she popped in the DVD and ran over to the couch, like a teenager.
"Oh, yea, 'cause she's living in the 40's, is a nurse, and has a boyfriend in the war," said Chandler sarcastically, as he walked into the room.
He paused as he neared Rachel, "Hey, I heard about the baby, congrats."
"Thanks," Rachel replied, as the movie began.
After watching ¼ of the movie, Monica finally began to talk, "See, see here's the part where her boyfriend dies. Now, in your situation, you could think of Rave as Ross. Now, we know Ross isn't dead..."
"We don't know that," Rachel interrupted.
"Hey, now if you go around with an attitude like that, then a movie's no use. Anyway, now, you remember his friend, Danny? Well, she's gonna fall in love with him, but then she finds out that Rave isn't dead! So, maybe Ross will come back, even when you think he's gone. Well, later, she finds out she's pregnant with Danny's child, but, in this case, you're having Ross's baby, but that's pretty much the only difference."
"Thanks, Monica, you've managed to explain a three-hour movie in about three minutes, now I know exactly what's going to happen next!" Rachel said, sarcastically.
"Oh, sorry, I just got a little carried away," Monica explained.
"Honey, can we watch the movie later, I'm really tired," Rachel yawned.
"Sure, I've got some bath salts and candles under the bathroom sink, if you feel like relaxing before you go to bed," Monica told Rachel.
"Ok, thanks," Rachel replied, as she walked into the bathroom.
A Few Minutes Later
"MONICA!" Rachel screamed from the bathroom.
"Honey, I'm coming," Monica yelled, as she headed towards the bathroom to help her friend.
"I think I'm losing the baby!" Rachel cried.
Monica reached the bathroom to find Rachel, doubled over in pain, lying on the ground. She immediately called 911 and an ambulance arrived minutes later.
Monica and Chandler's
It has been about three months since Rachel's car accident, and the day Ross left. Rachel was completely healed... well, physically, at least. Her heart hadn't just been broken, or shattered into pieces as some people would say. It wasn't smashed by a hammer, or ripped from her chest. Instead, it was isolated, inside a coffin, and it couldn't escape.
All of these thoughts were passing through her mind, as she leaned over Monica and Chandler's deck. Why? That was the puzzling question that seemed to flood her brain. Why had Ross left her? Why had Ross left his children? Why had Ross put her through so much pain? Why? She never even got to tell him... tell him what she had found out that very day.
I guess I'll never know, Rachel thought sadly. She wondered where he was, almost constantly. Maybe he was living life as if nothing had happened. Maybe he was a bum on the streets. Maybe he had met another women, maybe even married her. It wasn't a scary thought, knowing Ross's tendency to walk down the isle. Maybe he had met a new group of friends. Maybe he was still at the park. Maybe he was dead.
Dead. She couldn't imagine Ross... gone, forever. Although she was living without him now, she had always believed that he was safe. But, if she found out he was dead, things would be different. He could never rescue her, come back and love her, make up for all of the things that had happened in the past. Sure, it was a stretch, she knew that. However, for some reason, Rachel felt that someday, he would come back for her. Back for his three children, and of course, his wife.
"Rach, you okay?" asked Chandler, concerned.
"Do you think he'll ever come back for me?" Rachel asked, gazing at the sky.
"I..I don't know, honey. We all hope he will, but, it's just so unrealistic," he replied, sadly.
"Summer misses him, she doesn't understand," Rachel whispered.
"I thought you told her," Chandler said, now confused.
"I did."
Flashback- Two Months Ago
"Mommy! You're home from the hospital! Yay!" Summer squealed, hugging her mother's knees, her favorite tradition.
"Yes, baby, Mommy's here," Rachel replied, scooping up her daughter.
"Where's daddy?" the girl asked, noticing that her father wasn't there.
"He.. he's gone," Rachel coughed, holding back tears.
"When's he coming home?" Summer questioned.
"He. He's not coming back sweetie," Rachel cried, holding her daughter.
End of Flashback
"It'll be okay Rach," Chandler consoled her.
"No, no it won't," Rachel sobbed. No one could understand, only she knew.
Ever since she was a young girl, her father taught her how to keep a secret. And she was exceptionally good at it. I guess things haven't changed, Rachel thought. Even as an adult, she could hide things from people with so much ease. But, in the end, she always felt so guilty.
"Why are you saying that? You know, you'll always have us," Chandler told her.
"I think I need to tell Monica something," Rachel told Chandler, as she walked inside the house.
Monica was washing dishes in the sink. Rachel always seemed to find it funny. Maybe it was because of the huge, rubber gloves that she always wore, or maybe it was just because she was so stubborn. For God's sake, she had a dishwasher!
"Mon, we need to talk," Rachel began.
Monica dropped the dishes, "What is it, honey? Is it something I did? Something I said? 'Cause if it is, I'm so sooo sorry."
"No, it's about me," Rachel stammered, almost panicking.
Rachel took a deep breath, inhaling and exhaling, "I'm having a baby."
"Or, in other words, you're pregnant! Yay! This is..." Monica began, then stopped, as she looked at Rachel's face.
What is WRONG with me, Monica thought. My friend's husband –and my brother – just left, and now she's pregnant with his child. God, why can't I just shut-up sometimes.
"Honey, I'm sorry. I forgot, I just," Monica started.
"I'm 3 ½ months," Rachel said, her face pale.
"God, woman! I'm going to kill you! You have some kind of mental illness, I'm serious! I mean, are you afraid that we're SCARED of you when you're pregnant? Like you suddenly turn into some serial killer? NO, we're not like that. I, for one, am always happy when my best friend finds out she's pregnant..." Monica screamed at the top of her lungs.
"I'm.. I'm so so.r.rry, Mon," Rachel sobbed.
"Oh, God, honey, I've done it again haven't I?" Monica said, upset with herself.
Rachel solemnly nodded her head in reply.
"Hey! I've got an idea... let's watch a movie, just like old times. That'll be sure to cheer us up, right?" Monica suggested.
"Sure, Mon, that sounds great," Rachel replied, as she made her way over to the couch.
After minutes of rummaging through the DVD cabinet (yep, we're too old for VHS), Monica finally found a movie; "Pearl Harbor!"
"I've never seen that, is it good?" Rachel asked curiously.
"It's great, honey. And, I think it'll be good for you. You can really relate to it," Monica told her friend, as she popped in the DVD and ran over to the couch, like a teenager.
"Oh, yea, 'cause she's living in the 40's, is a nurse, and has a boyfriend in the war," said Chandler sarcastically, as he walked into the room.
He paused as he neared Rachel, "Hey, I heard about the baby, congrats."
"Thanks," Rachel replied, as the movie began.
After watching ¼ of the movie, Monica finally began to talk, "See, see here's the part where her boyfriend dies. Now, in your situation, you could think of Rave as Ross. Now, we know Ross isn't dead..."
"We don't know that," Rachel interrupted.
"Hey, now if you go around with an attitude like that, then a movie's no use. Anyway, now, you remember his friend, Danny? Well, she's gonna fall in love with him, but then she finds out that Rave isn't dead! So, maybe Ross will come back, even when you think he's gone. Well, later, she finds out she's pregnant with Danny's child, but, in this case, you're having Ross's baby, but that's pretty much the only difference."
"Thanks, Monica, you've managed to explain a three-hour movie in about three minutes, now I know exactly what's going to happen next!" Rachel said, sarcastically.
"Oh, sorry, I just got a little carried away," Monica explained.
"Honey, can we watch the movie later, I'm really tired," Rachel yawned.
"Sure, I've got some bath salts and candles under the bathroom sink, if you feel like relaxing before you go to bed," Monica told Rachel.
"Ok, thanks," Rachel replied, as she walked into the bathroom.
A Few Minutes Later
"MONICA!" Rachel screamed from the bathroom.
"Honey, I'm coming," Monica yelled, as she headed towards the bathroom to help her friend.
"I think I'm losing the baby!" Rachel cried.
Monica reached the bathroom to find Rachel, doubled over in pain, lying on the ground. She immediately called 911 and an ambulance arrived minutes later.