Chapter 10: An International Merger of Insanity

"I can't believe you made us miss the bus," Averman complained, taking a sip of his coffee, then passing it to Luis. "I'm going to get ill again."

"No, you're not. Don't be so dramatic," Luis chided, but straightened Averman's scarf before he took the cardboard cup.

"What took you so long anyway? You're the speedster of the team, it should have taken you two minutes max to get back to the shop for your wallet," Averman observed.

"It wasn't in the shop," Luis replied. "I had to re-trace our steps to find it."

"You're lucky. If that was my wallet, it would have vanished. Not that there's anything to steal, but there you go," Averman said. "And I felt like such a loser in Starbucks. I thought you'd followed through with your threat to find someone else."

"I'll never find anyone to replace you." Luis grinned. "Everyone else is too normal."

Averman smiled brilliantly at him.

"Hey guys." Averman and Luis looked up to see the Bash Brothers approaching them, laden down with bags, mostly from record stores.

"Hey," Luis replied. "Buy anything good?"

"You would only wince if we played this stuff to you," Portman said, indicating his bag of CDs.

"Have you heard the tragic news?" Fulton asked, taking a seat. He noticed Luis' alarmed look and realised his wording wasn't particularly tactful given recent events. "The Banks' Christmas party is off. They're being invaded by millions of relatives from all over the world."

"A merger of International Banks?" Averman suggested, and the Bash Brothers gave him a withering look. Luis elbowed him and smiled. "And I suppose Adam's ashamed of us in front of all of his relatives?" Averman continued in mock offence.

"Hardly. Adam's staying at school for Christmas, he doesn't get on with his cousins. They tend to band up with his brother and spend their time kicking the crap out of him," Fulton said.

"So we're staying at the dorms for Christmas too, showing a bit of solidarity," Portman added. "What about you guys?"

"Any excuse to avoid the Averman invasion sounds good to me."

"I wouldn't mind not going home. My ears pop for three days after a flight," Luis said thoughtfully.

"The dorms aren't that bad over Christmas anyway," Fulton said.

"Yeah, I mean, the Christmas dinner always sucks, with Stiles glaring at you, but there's always an unofficial party that starts around midnight and ends around six when the teachers give up on their 'hear no evil' policy," Portman said.

Luis and Averman exchanged glances. Neither of them had realised the Bash Brothers stayed at the dorms for the holidays.

"How come the teachers are so lenient about this party?" Luis asked finally.

"Would you want to take detention over Christmas? Bad enough you're stuck supervising the losers that are stuck there, let alone one-on-one for an hour because they misbehave." Fulton replied.

"As one of those 'losers that are stuck there', hey!" Portman responded.

"We're seeing how many Ducks we can convince to stay. Sadly Charlie is one of them. Adam is probably contemplating going home now," Fulton continued. "And you'll be delighted to know that Terri is staying because of Charlie, then she begged your good friend Annie to stay. Annie forced Terri to agree to doing her laundry for a week and keep their room tidy for a month before she said yes. However, we know that Annie never goes home for Christmas anyway, so good for her. Goldie, Dwayne, Ken and Russ have already agreed to stay. We have yet to find Julie, Connie and Guy."

"You've been busy," Averman observed.

"We have indeed," Portman said. "Ooh, bus." He turned to Fulton. "You're my lucky penny, man. I never have to wait long for the bus when you're around." He gathered up his shopping and got on.

Fulton rolled his eyes. "I read the timetable," he explained to Luis and Averman.

"That idea would work for us too, if Luis knew how to tell the time," Averman said, following them onto the bus. The Bash Brothers took the seat behind them, and Luis and Averman twisted in their seats to continue the conversation. Averman was highly aware that Luis' knee was resting on his. They both had their arms crossed and were leaning on the seat back, Luis' fingers were just touching Averman's sleeve. A couple of minutes into the journey, Luis began to play with his sleeve. From the look on his face, Averman was fairly sure he had no idea that he was doing it.

Averman decided that he had to talk to Annie when they got back to the dorms. Annie knew about flirtation – she was a cheerleader, they talked about things like that endlessly, according to the movies Averman had seen. A conversation with Annie was definitely in order.

Luis shifted slightly, his leg moving slightly further up Averman's. He appeared to be deep in conversation with the Bashes, and unaware of his movements. Luis turned to Averman and smiled. "Right?"

"Huh?" As responses went, this one wasn't spectacular.

"Let me guess, you were thinking about that book?" Luis said.

"What book?" Fulton asked.

"A copy of Never Ending Story that Averman will just die if he doesn't get. There were also threats of pretzel throwing," Luis responded.

"Why throw pretzels?" Portman asked. "They crumble. Throw Jell-O instead, that wibbles."

All three of them turned to stare at him. "I'll bear that in mind, thank you." Averman said finally.

"Speaking of Jell-O…" Portman began.

"We weren't, we were talking about books," Fulton reminded him.

"Then I mentioned Jell-O. Ergo, subject change."

"My bad, please, do continue."

"Annie and Terri have volunteered to make vodka Jell-O for the party." Portman said. "They have a kettle, vodka and a fridge with ice tray in their room. They're looking for more fridge owners."

"There's no room for us in our room, let alone a luxury like a fridge," Averman pointed out, trying to keep a conscious focus on the conversation at hand.

"Well, your job can be to find the people who do have fridges," Fulton explained slowly, as if dealing with a difficult toddler.

"Unless you missed it, we don't have friends," Averman said. "Just you two, each other and Annie. And the rest of the Ducks, but I suppose you've already talked to them."

"Don't be difficult, Averman. Whenever I see you, people always come up and talk to you," Portman said.

Luis nodded. "That's true."

"They're just people from the drama department," Averman shrugged. "They're not really friends."

"They're people who know you. It's just Luis who's the friendless loser." Portman sent a grin in Luis' direction.

"Even worse now that Averman and Annie get on, I don't even have a whole friend to myself," Luis said, smiling at Averman and continuing to idly play with his sleeve.

"It's ok," Averman told him. "I still like you."

Luis knocked on Annie's door, hoping and praying that Terri was out somewhere with Charlie.

"It's open!" came Annie's voice through the door.

He let himself in and found her sitting at her desk, leafing through a magazine.

"Oh. My. God!" she said slowly. "Luis Mendoza? Is that you? It feels like years since we last spoke."

"Ha, ha," Luis replied. "Is now a bad time to ask a favour?"

"What's the favour?"

"To hold on to something for me."

She quirked an eyebrow at him. "I don't swing that way."

"Shut up, Annie. I'm sending something to you, and I need you to keep it in your room. Do you mind?" He smiled winningly at her.

She sighed deeply, pushing a curl out of her blue eyes so she could glare at him fully. "Why would I mind? I don't see you for god knows how long, and now I'm supposed to act as a mail forwarding service for you."

"Oh no, not the guilt thing," he said nervously.

"Yes, the guilt thing. I barely ever see you anymore," she replied, standing up. "And I understand that last week your roommate was sick and the week before that things were difficult, but… before that you weren't around much either." Annie's lip wobbled, and she bent her head low, using her hair to obscure her face.

"Annie…" he took a step towards her.

"No, I'm fine. Remember how fine I was last time you were being all ditzy? When you fell in love with Mindy, I was just fine!" she whimpered. "I'm your best friend and I don't even know this person you're falling in love with."

"I'm not being ditzy. I'm just busy, and I've had a bad couple of weeks." Luis paused as he processed Annie's last sentence. "And I'm not falling in love."

"You weren't around much before everything with Mindy," she pointed out, as tactfully as she could, her voice a little shaky. "When you vanish it's generally because you're in a loving bubble!"

"Annie…"

"Just… go away, Luis!" she snapped. "I'll do the damned favour, just leave me alone!"

"Annie, don't be like this."

"Just go away!" She moved forwards and caught him by the shoulders, propelling him out of the door.

The minute the door was slammed she wiped her eyes and broke into a sunny grin. That would certainly give Luis something to think about. Annie wasn't good at manipulation, and Luis wasn't great about opening up about his feelings to her. The accusation that he was falling in love without mentioning who he was falling in love with seemed like the best way to give Luis a prod in the right direction.

There was a knock at the door seconds later. Annie opened it automatically, suddenly realising that she didn't look depressed and idly running excuses through her mind in case it was Luis on an apology mission. Luckily it was Averman.

"I need to talk to you," he said without any preamble.

"Does this have to do with Luis' favour?" she asked, ushering him in. "Because I already said I'd do that."

"What favour?" Averman asked.

"Ok, never mind. What's the question?"

"How do you know someone's flirting with you?"

"Gah!" Annie yelled. "He is, ok? He's flirting. I just don't think he's noticed."

"What does that mean?" Averman replied.

"It means that the two of you need your heads knocking together. You're engaged in a very heavy game of verbal foreplay and it's about time one of you did something to move on!" She flopped down on the bed dramatically. "And when's the last time anyone showed any interest in my love life? Why does nobody ask 'Hey, Annie, what's up in your love-land?'… and why does that sound so dirty?"

Averman took a seat at Annie's desk. "Um, ok. Annie, how's your love life?"

"I'm not telling you. It might jinx it," she said.

"See? This is why we don't ask."

"It doesn't matter what I reply! The question should still be asked!" she yelled.

"Are you on any form of medication?"

"I live with Theresa Anne McDowell. You try that for just one week and see how sane you can stay!" Annie said. "My brain hurts and I want to go back to bed."

Averman got to his feet nervously. "Ok then, I'll leave you be." He paused at the door. "I do really care about you and your love life. Honestly."

"I know you do." She smiled at him. "I'm just stuck in the same situation as you, I don't know if my beloved is gay. Although I think you've had more hopeful signs than I have."

"Good luck with that."

"Thanks."

Averman let himself out of the room and began the trek back to the boys' dorms. On his way he bumped into Aisha. Usually he'd duck behind a plant or into a doorway to avoid her, but remembered that the Bashes were on the lookout for fridge owners, so waved to her instead. "Hey, Aisha."

She did a double-take, then walked over to him. "Hi," she replied in a surprised tone.

"Do you have a fridge? It has to be one with an ice tray."

"That's got to be the weirdest question I've been asked all day. And I've just come from a counselling session with an idiot who wears purple sneakers with his suit."

"Ah, just-call-me-Bill?" Averman asked.

"That's the one."

"So what were you there for?" He asked, then realised that it was a very personal question for the very second conversation he had ever had with her. "Forget I asked, sorry, I'm nosy."

"Ah, just the regular teen angst. Abandonment issues. Mom and Dad won a holiday for two to Florida for Christmas so I'm staying at the dorms. I told them I was fine with it, but they worry a little, so they called just-call-me-Bill and I had to go talk about it," she replied with a grin. "He asked me if I was a vegetable, which one would I be. When I said corn on the cob, he got very nervous."

Averman grinned at her. When she wasn't doing her girly-breathy-voiced-flirtation with Luis, she was actually an amusing person. "Well, I return to my question, do you have a fridge?"

"If I say yes, does it make me an axe murderer?"

"No."

"Then yes."

"Excellent, go see Annie." Averman responded. "And the fact that you're staying for Christmas is even better. She'll fill you in. Oh, and tread carefully, she's in an odd mood."

"What's up with her?" Aisha asked, looking concerned.

"I think it's love stuff." He decided. "You're a girl, go give her chocolate and a hug or something."

Aisha gave him an odd look. He shrugged. "I don't know much about girls." He admitted. "But that's what they do in movies."

"Where have you been?" Luis asked, as Averman entered the Shoebox.

"To see Annie." He replied, crashing down on the bed. "She was in a weird mood."

"I upset her," Luis said.

"You did? How?"

"I made her cry," Luis added morosely, ignoring the question.

"How?" Averman repeated. "Was it because you're not showing enough interest in her love life? Because I got lambasted for that too. It doesn't matter that she won't tell us, we must remember to ask."

Luis made no reply and slumped back on his bed, throwing an arm over his eyes so he wouldn't be dazzled by the light bulb.

"Wanna go kill a plant with the Bashes?" Averman offered.

"No thanks." Luis said, replaying Annie's words in his head. Why was she so convinced that he was in love? He hadn't been around anyone to fall in love with. Even Aisha had been around less and less recently. The only person he'd hung out with was Averman, so there was no-one he could have fallen in love with. But to Annie's mind, he supposed it made sense. Although he'd met Annie after he started dating Mindy, Annie had been there to witness Luis falling in love for the first time, and put up with him breaking study-dates and turning up late to meet her, with surprising good grace.

"Are you ok?" He sensed Averman moving closer to him, and felt a tentative hand on his arm. "Are you thinking about Mindy?"

"Not exactly," he replied. "Annie thinks I'm in love with someone."

Averman instantly retracted his hand. "And are you?"

Luis noted that Averman's voice was slightly shaky. He shrugged. "I don't think so. There's no-one to fall in love with."

"Right," Averman said in a tight tone. "You know, I think I'm gonna hunt for more fridge owners." He left the room.

Luis sighed deeply. Was everyone going insane today?

Notes: Naturally the idea of staying in the dorms at Christmas is from Harry Potter.

Thank Yous:

lycanthrope: Did you notice that Luis quotes a Gn'R song? The store clerk is Carla, or was supposed to be. She's a B&N tycoon, and a fountain of knowledge about it. And what can I say about Adam and Charlie? I just like to see them fight. I thought you'd pick up on the Apt Pupil comment, you tend to know everything about everything that interests me, which is why I like having you around so much (and on that note, I watched "O" the other day, must email you my thoughts on that and other things). Oh, and the book store owner, he scares me too. There's a book store two doors down from my flat that I very rarely shop in because of the manager/owner, he always makes me feel like I'm going to taint the books if I touch them, so I put a bit of his scariness into the guy in this fic.

Meme: I won't hate you for not reviewing. *sharpens knife* Glad you liked the days being broken down like that. I was going to use that at the beginning of each of the chapters, but then I decided to introduce the story first. I'm glad I finally got to use that format.

Melissa: I'm continuing! Sometimes it just takes awhile for me to get through a chapter, I'd rather leave it for awhile then post something I'm not completely happy with. Don't worry, I'm not abandoning this fic.

Graceful Fall: Glad you're still reading. Thank you for the thumbs up!

Kristine: Have the Christmas decorations gone up at your local mall yet? All of our shops are very festive. It's giving me a nervous breakdown. But I do love Christmas. The next chapter will probably be fairly Christmassy – or maybe the next one. *grins* You can start twitching now!

Sasky Elf: Glad I've converted another Averman Fangirl. He needs more love, he gets the best lines in the movies, but not enough fan fiction attention. I have to say though, it was Gabby's idea for the pairing, but I'm having a lot of fun with it.

Sylvah Tigah: My fic makes you giddy? This is surely a good thing. I'm glad you get giddy over it. Here's the next chapter, and hopefully it will inspire more giddiness.

Gabby: You're still here, and I'm glad. Since this fic was your idea, I'm glad I've managed to keep your attention. And you gave me two reviews! I feel so special. By the way, about your questions in the second review, about Luis' family, you've actually made very interesting points. I hadn't given much thought to how their families would react, and now that you've sparked the idea, I'm going to put some serious thought into it. Would you mind if I contacted you by email to ask a few questions, since you have a little experience in the area of coming out to a traditional style family? Also, I take it that if family is important, Luis staying at the dorms for Christmas might be a bit of a struggle? I'll email you – as soon as I find your addy!

Terra: This will be slash. Eventually. There are slashy thoughts at the moment. Soon there might even be slashy actions. I'm getting there!

Cimmy: Don't worry about being a bad reviewer, I'm also terrible with reviews (hence I now reply to them, it's the least I can do!). Thanks for the feedback. Did you know that before the ducks I never wrote m/m slash. I'd write femmeslash, but somehow didn't think I'd be able to write male slash. I'm glad you like the plant thing, my mother also gives me plants every so often. They die instantly too. I am the Botanical Grim Reaper, and proud!