Chapter 11: Don't Cry
Averman knew he was being unreasonable. That wasn't in question, he just didn't know what to do about it. It was not Luis' fault that he wasn't in love with him. However, that didn't stop him from feeling both rejected and resentful. Consequently, he had taken to avoiding spending much time with Luis over the past week.
Which was why he was sitting in Goldberg's room, playing The Sims. Goldie was an official Sims nerd, he lived for the game, and even had a website displaying his houses and various objects he had made for the game. Averman had to admit, Goldie knew how to decorate a house. Averman also had to admit that he was crap at this game.
"Um," Averman said tentatively. "Fire."
Goldberg shot to his feet and started frantically shouting instructions. "Click on the fire, chose extinguisher! No, not with her! Children can't use… Here! Let me!"
Averman moved away from the computer and let Goldberg take over. A few seconds later he turned to Averman and said reproachfully, "You killed Buffy."
"Maybe she's just taking a nap." Averman suggested, pointing to the comatose pixelated effigy of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on the screen.
Goldberg glared. "That's the Angel of Death walking down the garden path. You killed her." He paused the game and took a seat next to Averman on the bed. He sighed, then added grudgingly, "Oh well, at least I'll have a nice ghost in the house now."
"That makes me feel less guilty over my unintentional manslaughter."
There was a moment or two of silence, then Goldberg gave him a curious look. "Ok, I wasn't going to ask, but I can't not. Why are you here?"
"You told me that you had the new Sims game and would I like to come over and play?" Averman responded.
"But in all the years I've known you and have asked you, you've never said yes," Goldberg pointed out.
"Maybe I thought it was about time I stopped being so rude and actually accepted for a change?"
"Did you and Luis have a fight?" Goldberg asked. "You can tell me, I'm completely cool with it."
Averman grunted in response, suddenly remembering that Goldberg was still under the impression that Luis and Averman were dating, and that he'd never actually gotten around to setting him straight on that count. For some reason it had never come up in conversation, and it had felt awkward to bring up as a brand new topic. Also, he had assumed that Luis had taken care of the rumours.
"You'll make up. He loves you." Goldberg paused. "It is love, isn't it?" Before Averman could reply, he nodded to himself. "It must be. I've seen you two together. And he's walking around with a face like a wet weekend at the moment, so he really must care about you."
This jolted Averman out of his reverie. "He has?" He brightened momentarily, then sighed. "But I don't think he loves me."
"I'm sure he does," Goldberg said reassuringly. "Someone has to."
Luis was getting severely frustrated. He had been all over campus – twice – and still had not found Averman. He had barely seen him all week, and given their cramped living quarters, that was quite an achievement. And even when Averman was around things were weird. For the first time since September, there seemed to be an uncomfortable silence between himself and Averman. It appeared to have started after they got back from shopping, and for the past week things had been slightly odd in the Shoebox. Averman had moments of absolute insanity that alarmed even Luis, then would come the periods of awkward quietness.
Luis finally admitted defeat on trying to find Averman and returned to the Shoebox, only to find Averman already there, engrossed in a paperback. "Where have you been?" he asked.
"Setting fire to Buffy the Vampire Slayer and making ghosts with Goldberg," Averman replied.
"I would ask but further explanation might scare me," Luis said, taking a seat on his bed.
"Hrmm," Averman replied distractedly, his attention returning to his book.
"Have I offended you in some way?" Luis asked, after several minutes of awkward silence.
"No. Why?" Averman replied instantly.
"Things are weird." Luis commented. "You didn't even wait for me on Thursday." And it was true. Averman had vanished to drama practice without waiting for Luis in the cafeteria as was his usual plan, and when Luis turned up, Averman's concentration was so shot to pieces that Mr Redfern took him to aside to talk to him about it.
"I told you, I forgot."
Luis sighed. "Well, things are still weird."
There was another lengthy silence and Luis contemplated going to find Annie just to have a conversation. Then again, she was being just as odd. When he turned up at her door to apologise for being heartless and all that stuff that he thought she wanted to hear, she had no recollection of their fight, and seemed to only realise what he was talking about nearly ten minutes into the conversation. The rest of the Ducks were just as bad. Connie and Julie had a tendency to coo over him, still believing that he and Averman were dating, Adam was apt to ask whether dressing neatly made him gay and Charlie either made speeches or yelled at Luis to get out of his room so he could kill Adam without witnesses.
"I had a bad week, ok?" Averman admitted.
"What?" Luis said, jerking back to the conversation at hand, instead of musing how not one of his friends possessed a single shred of sanity between them.
"I just had a bad week. Lots of silly little things got on top of me, and I didn't think they were worth mentioning because before that you had the uber-bad week. You had genuine problems and mine is just silly school stuff." Averman finished in a rush. "So, can we just forget it?"
Luis gave him a searching look, Averman was obviously not going to share whatever was troubling him at this moment, maybe it would be a good idea to change the subject. But then again, the weird silences were starting to get on his nerves. As far as Luis was concerned, Averman was his best friend and the idea that there was something even slightly wrong with their friendship at the moment was bothering him greatly.
"By the way, are we going to the mall tomorrow?" Averman asked in an obvious attempt at changing the subject.
Luis sighed. "I can't, I'm sorry. I'm all out of money."
"I'll lend you bus fare. After all, I still owe you for the book," Averman offered.
"Well, I said I'd hang out with Annie." Luis added. Over the past week, he had been clinging to the faint hope that Averman had forgotten about the book, which, on reflection, was quite laughable.
"Oh." Averman looked quite disheartened.
"But we could both hang out with her, and go to the mall another time," Luis suggested.
Averman sighed deeply and, with that, silence reigned over the Shoebox once more.
"He hates me," Luis announced melodramatically, flinging himself onto Terri's bed, then moments later jumping back up to remove the various Poppels, Care Bears and other soft toys that were covering it.
"Stop being such a drama queen." Annie barely glanced up from her nails, which she was painting in school colours. "And I hope you took note of the order those toys were in, Terri is strangely anal about things like that."
"He's avoided me all week, and now he hates me because I wouldn't go to the mall with him."
"Lester Averman does not hate you," Annie told him sternly.
"He does."
"Urgh, you're so pouty." Annie fanned her nails. "Have you talked to him?"
"And said what? 'Sorry, Les. I can't go to the mall with you today because I'm trying to organise a Christmas surprise for you'?"
Annie gave him another stern look. "You bore me. You're such a drama queen."
"How can a drama queen be boring?" Luis wondered.
"You're making a mountain out of a molehill."
"I think you covered that with 'drama queen'. But thanks for the reinforcement." Luis replied.
"Just talk to him, say things are weird and ask why."
"I already did that," Luis said. "It didn't work."
"Then I don't know what to suggest."
"You're no help at all, Annie," Luis complained.
"Why am I supposed to have the answers?" She asked in return. "Why do you always expect me to have good advice? Why isn't 'I don't know' a good enough answer for you?"
"You're a girl," Luis replied sweetly. "You're more emotionally mature that me, you're supposed to understand things like this."
"Hrmm." Annie considered this. "Despite the obvious suck up attempt, I still have no answers." She smiled brightly. "But I can offer you chocolate and paint your nails to cheer you up."
"He hates me," Averman announced dolefully to Goldberg as they walked through the mall. He was so depressed that even people-watching wasn't giving him the usual thrill of discovery.
"Luis Mendoza does not hate you. Stop being so dramatic," Goldberg replied firmly. "Just talk to him."
Averman pouted. He knew he was pouting, and hated himself for it, but seemed unable to shake his grotty mood. "He's not here. He knew how much I wanted that book and he's not here."
"Maybe he has a very good reason," Goldberg replied, in much the same tone a mother would use to coax a stroppy toddler out of a sulk. "Or maybe he genuinely forgot."
"Or maybe he hates me."
"You are being a drama queen. Nobody hates anyone – with the possible exception of Adam and Charlie. Stop pouting. We'll go and get your book, then we'll go back to the dorms and you can talk to Luis and find out why everything is so weird between you two."
"Ok." Averman sighed, trying to chivvy himself into a good mood. As they neared the store, his spirits did start to lift. Maybe when he got back, he and Luis could have a normal conversation, he could show Luis his book, and they would talk and everything would stop being strained between them.
And if not, he could take his book, show Goldberg, and then kill everyone in Goldie's Sims house, including Willow, Xander, Faith, Angel, Spike and Tara. Well, maybe not Tara and Willow, it would be nice to show a little gay solidarity.
"Oh, it's you," the bookseller said disdainfully. He frowned in Goldberg's direction. "But not you. Where's your friend?"
The bookseller's light question hit Averman like a sledgehammer. "He hates me!" he replied woefully.
"He doesn't," Goldberg said, elbowing Averman. "He's just busy."
"Can I have my book please?" Averman asked. "I've brought the money."
"I'm sorry, sir," the bookseller replied with mock formality. "But a man came in not long after you left. He offered me another twenty dollars over what you could offer. I'm afraid that the sale was too good to refuse. I can give you a refund."
Averman approached the counter, holding one finger up. "Excuse me, I just hallucinated. I heard you say that you'd sold my book to someone else."
"I'm very sorry." The bookseller didn't even try to sound contrite, much less look it. "But in my defence, it was not your book."
"Half of it was," Averman replied in a hollow tone. If Luis had been here, Averman would have been furious, absolutely hopping mad, but he found himself simply washed out with disappointment. He was alarmed to note that his throat was getting tight and his eyes were beginning to water. He muttered something about giving the refund to Goldberg before bolting out of the store.
He managed to get to the men's restrooms before the tears started to fall. He realised that crying over a book was exceptionally foolish. It was only a book, after all. And he had read it many times, the paperback was somewhere in the Shoebox, he could read it at any time. Then he realised that it wasn't just the book that was bothering him, it was the situation with Luis. He hated that things were awkward, and wished they could go back to the way they were. He also wished that Luis had been there in the bookstore, because then maybe he wouldn't have the bookseller sneering inside his head, "Where's your friend?"
After calming himself and wiping his eyes, he walked out of the stall, pausing to rinse his face with cold water, in an attempt to hide the fact he had been crying.
He then made his way back to the bookstore where he hoped Goldberg would have stayed. If Goldie had gone looking for him, they would probably be searching for each other until kingdom come. Luckily Goldie was sitting on the benches opposite the store, a keen eye out for him. On spotting Averman he gave him a friendly smile and stood up to meet him.
"I'm going to try and cheer you up," Goldberg announced. "I might not be very good at it, but I'll try anyway. When I'm depressed, I like to cook. So I'm going to cook for you. You need comfort food."
"Does it involve chocolate?" Averman asked hopefully.
"Actually, it involves a full meal – followed by a chocolate cheesecake." Goldberg smiled.
Averman wasn't entirely sure what Goldberg was cooking, and he was completely sure that every time he "helped" Goldie had to spend about twenty minutes rectifying the situation. Goldie quickly learnt to delegate jobs such as "Wash this pot" and "Could you chop this onion for me?" to Averman, and nothing more.
Mostly, he realised, Goldie was trying to take his mind off his woes, and for the most part it was working. Goldie was very skilled in the kitchen, which is why Mrs Marsh, the Home Ec teacher, had let him have free run of the kitchens should he want to cook. It was quite impressive to see him flit from one job to another, never neglecting anything or letting anything burn.
He also kept up a steady stream of conversation throughout, either explaining what he was doing, or talking about how he had learnt this or that from various after-school classes, and how eventually he wanted to take over his parent's business and make it a proper restaurant instead of just a delicatessen.
After getting back from the mall, Averman had wanted to sulk alone, but Goldie was having none of it. He had sent Averman off to borrow the key to the Home Ec kitchens while he went and got changed, then met him there and started cooking.
"Go away," Goldberg said finally. "Have a seat at the table."
"Am I getting in the way?" Averman replied.
"Well, yes, but it's almost ready." Goldberg smiled over Averman's shoulder. "And the other guest is here. So have a seat, and I'll bring your food over."
Averman turned around, already knowing who he would see.
Luis stood in the doorway, looking slightly baffled. "I'm here," he said for clarification.
"Have a seat." Goldie gestured to the table set for two – the one job Averman had completed with a minimum of winces and instruction from Goldberg.
"Only two settings," Averman commented.
"Yes," Goldberg replied in a very patient tone. "One for you, one for Luis. You two will eat my wonderful cooking, you will talk and you will stop pouting. Do as I say, have a seat and let me serve."
Averman complied obediently, as did Luis a few moments later. They gave each other nervous smiles, but did not talk at all as Goldberg served them spaghetti with meatballs and a side dish of garlic bread.
"Your desert is in the refrigerator. All I ask is that you guys wash up. I'll see you tomorrow." Goldie said grandly, before making his exit.
"Why do I feel like I'm on a blind date?" Averman asked.
"I have that feeling too." Luis smiled back at him. "Although I've never been on a date where my invitation consisted of 'get your ass down to the Home Ec kitchens around seven and if you hurt his feelings I will beat you to death with a brick'." Luis said with a grin.
Averman groaned. "I am so very mortified," he decided, then paused. "A brick?"
"A brick," Luis confirmed. "And I assumed the 'he' in question was you, so naturally I would have been here, brick threat or not."
"Why?" Averman asked, starting on the garlic bread.
"Because we haven't had a conversation in a week and I miss you." Luis said.
The honesty and sincerity with which he replied caused Averman to choke. There was an agonising moment when his air supply was cut off, but Luis handed him some water and he was able to wash the blockage down.
When Averman's face returned to its normal colour, instead of the alarming purple shade it had been before, Luis tried again. "What's going through your head? Why aren't you around anymore?"
Averman shrugged, he didn't want to have this conversation. Things were weird enough without bringing crushes into the mix. "I've got the money I owe you for the book. That bastard sold it to someone else."
"He did?" Luis replied. "Wow, I'm sorry, I know you wanted that book. Did you yell at the bookseller?"
"No, I was quite pathetic actually," Averman replied.
"Want me to beat him to death with Goldie's brick?" Luis offered.
Averman felt the hint of a smile start to tug at his lips. "That would be nice."
"And I'll beat you with it if you disappear on me again like you have this week," Luis added.
"I didn't mean to, seriously. It was just a bad week and I didn't want to inflict my mood on you," Averman replied. "You didn't cause it or anything." Technically this was the truth, it wasn't Luis' fault he was straight.
"So I haven't offended you or hurt your feelings at all?" Luis asked one last time.
Averman considered the question. "Well, you didn't come with me to get my book," he pointed out. "I was a little miffed about that – since we're being honest."
"Well, I thought you were annoyed with me and wouldn't want me around, so I made plans with Annie," Luis said after a moment's thought. "I'm sorry."
"So we're good?" Averman asked.
"I think so. And now I really have to eat, this looks incredible." Luis quirked an eyebrow at Averman. "I take it you weren't involved."
"No, it's safe to eat. I washed pots, pans and knives. I did set the table though."
"Well, I was just thinking to myself how nicely the table was laid out." Luis grinned.
Averman grinned back.
Notes: Q requested: The Angel of Death, Garlic and the quote "My name is MC Menses and my flow be fresh" in this chapter. Thanks, Q. Make it real easy on me. Sadly I couldn't get the quote in.
You can get the Angel of Death for The Sims at Sims on a Stick – it really does exist. The addy is hrlnx dot aem-east dot com slash slemmer slash thenewsos slash – sorry, had to break it up because kills urls. You can get Buffy Sim skins from BuffySims dot com. Another good Sim link is Simslice dot com
I'm sorry the update has taken so long. My life has taken a down turn and it's very hard to write fluff when your world is being rocked repeatedly by a wheel-brace-wielding maniac… I'll stop. I'm boring myself with it all.
Thanks to:
Carla: beta extraordinaire, best friend, inspiration, muse template of humanity, the person I can call at 3am and cry down the phone to… words cannot convey how much I love you. So I'll use Irish, because it looks prettier. Is gra liom thu. x
KShyne99: Hey dudette, glad you're enjoying. Snarky lines is what I try to deliver in all chapters, though I probably failed in this one. I promise the next will be better.
Q: You're in love with my story? I'm flattered. Should you chose to court my story, I expect you to go about it in the proper way, dates, flowers, romance. We'll discuss next time you're online.
Meme: The Ducks will drink. Yes. I foresee bad things, amusing things, and more dead plants. That's what I see.
Kristine: Luis is incredibly dim when it comes to Averman's affections – at this point in time. Sooner or later he will open his eyes.
Sphinx: There is no such thing as a boring review. Every author loves to have their ego stroked. My ego is of epic proportions, so give yourself a pat on the back!
Angie: I had to end it somewhere. My chapters end up around the 3000 words mark, the average chapter has half that, I hate having to work out when to stop and when to start again, but it has to happen sometime. The next chapter will be longer. And more amusing.
Vic: lol! When have I ever managed to update with only one day between? *grins* And really, 15th November was my last chapter? Wow, that's almost a month between chapters. In my defence, I've had writers block. And hon, write that snarky fic, you know you want to. In fact, write the behind the scenes of this fic for Charlie and Adam if you want. I'd love to see where you go with it.
Melissa: Poor Averman? Last chapter was a breeze for him, if this chapter is the comparison. I feel really sorry for him now. Well, I did before the final segment. The poor guy has had a tough week. I only hurt him because I love him.
Terra: I know I've been promising you slash for a very long time, but it's coming. It really is. The next chapter has Christmas – or at least moves towards it, and where there's Christmas, there's mistletoe!
Pam: Thanks. I love 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon, it helps me turn my brain off at night.
lycanthrope: I have started to reply to your mail, I promise I have. Life has been busy recently and things haven't been the way I've wanted, so I will try to finish it soon. Yes, naturally I will rave about Elden's brilliance in "O". And raise some points that bugged me about the rest of it. I'm glad I made you "grin like an idiot". I aim to please. I'm trying to keep them both as kick-ass as possible, but this chapter's a slight downer. Next one will be better, I promise.
Schiz: Special shout out to you for the commercial break in Games & Dating. Well, all of it really, but I laughed until I cried, I feel so special that I'm in a commercial in your fic. I can't believe you had me threaten Santa with the Atkins diet. You are a genius.