Ohaiyo 10
Anniversary……………..or Nani?!
By Sukunami Taka
I AM BACK!!! Ohaiyo miinasan! Genki ka? Yours truly is back with a whole new Ohaiyo and guess what?! We have reached our tenth Ohaiyo!!! Celebration!!! hops around while waving a flag with a chibi sanzo on it and blowing into a noise maker collapse after a while and beam up with a toothy smile while wallowing in a colossal bean bag
Ahh…… I love this job…… and my fellow readers, if I still have any after I was gone for so long…. Gomen, gomen… I promise that I won't disappear for such a long time again…………. But now I am back, so….. ENJOY!!!
It's time again……… I should've known………..
Just that sometimes, when I wish that it would change….it'll be strange if it didn't come……….. kirrei ne…….it still is beautiful…after all these years…………….
It's time for the sakura blossoms to fall……..it'll be strange if they didn't… every year……yet still, every year they will fall……..
He turned away from the brightness, his silver midnight hair flowed free from their clasp, unlike his spirit which hold shackled within his immortal boy-like body. He took placid, deliberate steps… time was of no consequence to him… and was swallowed into the stifling darkness, a subtle scent of mountain lilies lingering behind. Upon the railing laid several large drops, a single tear trailing down… distorted blood-coloured quartz within the sunshine. Far below, the Festival of the Falling Blossoms commences…
The quiet man with straight shoulder-length brunette hair calmly lifted the glass to his lips, all the while shyly tugging at the ornate robe-collar wrapped around his neck. His irrepressibly boisterous partner, the controversial Kenren Taisho of Heaven West Army had already discarded his rich decorated dress-coat and had clambered up the thick gnarled tree, a cup of sake neatly balanced between his teeth and a bottle at his hip. Tenpo Gensui paused between sips, then called upwards, "Kenren sama…the meeting is in fifteen minutes before the Festival…."
A booming laughter replied him as the rowdy general dropped the empty flask and soon joined the placidly seated Tenpo on the ground. Kenren draped a strong arm around the slender shoulders and winked, "Ne….Ten-chan," he whispered mockingly, "Tell Ken-onichan what is the matter"
"Nani desu? Bet che ni…" Tenpo smiled, his willowy form rising as he got up and brushed away barely seen dust. The red headed warrior grinned, staring at Tenpo's back. Rolling his slanted eyes, he called out, "No need to hide it, Tenpo Gensui……you're worried about something. I can see it as plain as the bandages hidden beneath your jewel encrusted coat…!!"
As the general assistant walked away shaking his head, a hard thin line of barely a smile set upon his face…
A flare of light greeted the dark, then collapsed into nothingness. It fizzled, ash dropping upon the ground as its brother came to life, casting shades and dusty forms around. A pair of wide golden eyes stared unblinkingly into the numbing blackness of a single flame, as a gentle hand guided the swirling subtle circles, playful upon hidden colors, interlocking in intricacies merging into one another. The familiar five point elliptical star shuddered into being. A hint of a sardonic smile flickered, curving the slim drained face.
Violet eyes framed by a near perfect face narrowed in boredom while another pair, their difference in being voluminous and sparkling like golden-laid eggs, gazed endearingly to the outside world in the midst of an ice pink transformation. Song Goku, the eternal boy, uttered a mournful whine and turned to his 'guardian', "Ne…Konzen…nande yo…"
"Nani?! Baka saru…" snapped back the constantly disgruntled Konzen Douji, nephew to the ephemereal gorgeous Goddess of Mercy………..of course, opinionated Konzen would never admit it, either the nephew part or the gorgeous part…
The eyes like setting suns widen even more and their owner scampered and popped his head over the arm of the chair upon where Konzen was seated, "Ne, ne… iko Konzen… let's go to the Festival…..ne ne…" his small hands opened to clutch at Konzen's sleeve but before he could reach it, he received an immediate whacking on his tender head as a paper fan came out of nowhere.
"Iteeee…….." the young boy wailed, protecting himself with his arms.
The hypnotic violet eyes rolled, "Urusai…" he muttered.
Rubbing his sticking out haired head, Goku pouted, "Nande yo…"
Konzen growled, "Because you'll get into trouble…again…sorewa urusai…." He sat back, deep in thought. There is a gnawing feeling stirring within him and he didn't like it one bit… what in heaven's hell is going on….
After several moments, and the occasional thumpings of hard paper in contact with head, the slender Konzen got up, a hand running through his silky blond locks, "Iko…"
"Eh? Doko ni? Ne,Konzen…doko ni?"
"Urusai, baka saru…"
"Nande yo Konzen…doko orewa?"
The deity halted at the doorway, a distorted smile playing on his lips, "A-ma-te-ra-su…" speaking of the famed hall where the Kami-sama held his epoch making audience. Goku's innocent eyes beamed back, "Uh…hai!" and he bounded after his much beloved Konzen Douji.
Smouldering obscure darkness gathered within its shifting borders, threatening to overspill…yet a solidifying shape is taking hold, binding into a human form….hush….waiting with anticipation…breathe slightly catching.
A pale graying blue slit opened, settling a magnetic gaze upon the waiting immortal.
The almighty Lord, Tentenni, was settling deep into his Marble Dragon throne with the all too common smug dissatisfied look. He watched over those filing into the hall, over those he held dominion, albeit only through law and not their hearts.
How many more centuries will this continue he thought to himself,
Konzen Douji, Kenren Taisho, Tenpo Gensui….that insolent pet that follows my distant nephew around…and..
The small marble grey eyes swept through the crowd, agitated at the apparent absence of a certain deity.
Huh, one less here who is willing me into oblivion…what a surprise….
A mellow boom sent a shiver through the Great Hall, as the towering doors creaked upon their hinges, shutting with a resolute click. A second boom sounded. The meeting is to begin.
Rising sedately from his seat, the ageing immortal waits for the slow silence to descend. When he spoke, his voice took a low tone, slightly dry, "The new born earth lies trembling beneath us. It is open for ravage as the armies of men steadfastly move across its borders and unbidden demons gather for the purpose of their prince. No more can our Great Heaven stay silent while below a war would come striking blood among our mortals as it takes on a life of its own…."
Restless murmur, the marble eyes swivelled across…
"Action must commence. As Tentenni, I propose we send out our West Heaven Army and the Toushin.."
"And the expendable underdog to do your dirty work for you!"
Hushed silence as a multitude of proud heads turned, the Tentenni grasping hard on the arm of his seat. Who dare to interrupt the High God? Who dare to mock Heaven?
A small smile alighted on Tenpo's fair face are… Konzen rolled his deep violet eyes..che gaki…urusaiyo baka saru…
Na-ta-ku breathed Tentenni, and there stood the defiant stature of the fighting God, his great sword mirroring his large golden eyes propped against the compact shoulder. Gathering his calm, God cleared his throat, "We will overlook your delayed presence, Toushin Taishi…now take your place, you are to receive an assignment."
"Am I?" a widening snicker graced the young features, "I don't think so ajiji…"
"What?" asked Tentenni through gritted teeth.
"And as usual, your perfect ears have a problem." Nataku Taishi sighed as if in regret, and sat down on an invisible chair, placing his sword in front of him. A deep sigh as he leaned forward, his pointed chin on his clasped hands over the knobbed end of the hilt. Those mesmerising golden eyes snapped open, "Enough! We have had enough!" The faint mature voice rose, rising to almost a shout from the seated boy, "We are playing a joke, being played the fools by the Lord Fool of All! The Master, Creator, Tentenni! HAH! One by one he orders us to die….oh, I'm sorry…God's don't die, THEY SUFFER! No, I am too harsh. We are given an immortal life in a Heaven all humans yearn for. We pass an existence that lasts an eternity, while we watch the brief flickering lives below…irony has never eluded us, have it?
"Meaningless existence….what use if it have we? No, Lord Tentenni, since we have none, we will carry out your will like the dogs we are, don't you agree? No, Tentenni, we will go down below and kill and slaughter like the heretics we are. No, Tentenni, we will not bear regret for all the chaos we bring like the unloving machines we are. No, Tentenni, we will act upon your every whim with the likeness of servitude we honour with nothing else to cling upon."
He closed his eyes for a moment, a brief respite from his liquid pools of molten gold. His chest rose and fell rhythmically encased in its folds of cloth. Then he rose, and with a smooth stroke, swung his sword up, cutting into the solid marble a two metre overflowing gash of distorted blackened gravel. "It's time, Tentenni…" a contemptuous smile played upon his rosebud lips…
"What? You are to receive an order, Toushin Nataku Taishi…kneel immediately! The Elder Gods shall overlook your impudence!" gritted the Lord of All.
"No chance…baka maru…" a new voice interrupted the tension. Gasps ran through the crowd.
(how else can I tastefully describe shocked gods? They are gods after all – T)
Eyelashes like butterfly wings parted, revealing clam slate blue irises, set against the fairest of skin. The pale lips were slightly parted as if preparing for a kiss, curved at the corners hinting at a secret. A lean willowy figure clad in total black, from upright-collar coat upon a soft turtleneck to the Tick engraved sneakers, stood to the right of the small God. Dimmed rounded lights in the surrounding Hall shone a halo upon the two; a humourless deity, and a dashing stranger. The enraged Tentenni attempted to regain his dignity, a serious attempt indeed with his jaw nearly to the ground….for the second time?
Closing his wrinkled mouth with a splutter, the Almighty took a deep breathe, in effect causing a typhoon on the far northern side of Tenjikukoku, and slumped back delicately into his seat. The air crackled, "Dare anatawa?"
The young man grinned, "Su.."
"Su?"
"Sukunami….Taka des," he took a sweeping bow. And yet another ripple of gasps wavered through the high profile crowd. Konzen Douji shifted, leaning against the wall to get more comfortable and muttered a non-descriptive curse.. he has really done it this time the baka mono…
A look of surprise came over Tentenni, a look that quickly turned to cluelessness, "Dare…?"
The ever vivacious Kenren Taisho stifled a giggle, "Shall we get out now?" he suggested to his partner, but Tenpo Gensui shook his head and sighed, "Damage control ne…" he said with a hidden smile.
A cool blue eye surveyed the scattered remains of an ancient ritual with its golden brother narrowed. The near wasted deity slumped against the door frame, cool fingers running through his dark wiry hair. A greyish purple tinged shadow was cast across the broken lines of shimmery powder. Homura Tenjin looked up at the towering Kanzeon Bosatsu, her ample body barely contained in its flowing transparent folds of cloth. Both looked upon the overturned bars; setting leftover wax cooling on the dust covered floor, the split grains of colour mixing with trails of droplets of fagrant oil; muddy swirls. The Goddess of Mercy flicked her curls off her bare shoulders and turned, "Ikkou, Amaterasu a matta ne…"
Heretical Homura smiled wryly, "Yes, Nataku's waiting…"
O Glory Be to the Almighty, May He watch upon us, O Glory Be to the Lord of All, He who protects us
"SHUT UP!" screamed Tentenni and the ever gorgeous Taka in unison – well, with Taka it was more of a sharp order. Several chorusing seraphims flew away in disgust, hurt that their singing like the fluttering of birds' wings was not well received.
"Ok, let's try this again… I'm Sukunami Taka," said the ever lovable, with eyes that simply melts you…
(there is a reason why it isn't Kei who is writing this)
Taka, "The writer? Ohaiyo?" The same ignorant look remained on Tentenni's speckled face. Taka's well rounded shoulders slumped, the old man is never going to get it, he muttered, then glanced at a distracted Nataku, "Ne, you brought me here, what am I suppose to do?"
"What you do best, Sukunami san," came the reply in a flat voice, the smouldering eyes shifting into focus at the God upon the raised foundation, "Ten-te-nni," he uttered…
"Na….nani?"
"Betcheni desu……demo….."
"Nani Toushin Taishi? Finish this escapade of yours and quickly," ordered the impatient Lord.
"Shi…"
"Shi?"
"Shirnne!"
"NA…"
A ferocious blast of primal wind filled with reddish hues in voluminous crystallized fire touch upon the pearly walls cracking it into fine powder. A shadow of snowy dust settled softly upon them.
A puff of white escaped from the lips of nonchalant Konzen…although nonchalance is not necessarily a good thing regarding the ever vociferative Konzen…
Having been dislodged from his seat violently, Kami-sama was found inelegantly sprawled across his dais, indiscriminatory signs floating above his head. As our 'heroes' crowd around this mess, Taka frowned naively while nudging the solemn Nataku, "Was knocking him out part of the plan? Seems like something Kei would do…."
"Nani….." stated the Toushin brusquely, dark golden eyes flashing.
"Eh…hehe….." our lovable writer turned away quickly, humming a tuneless tune…
"So…..here's where the party is at………….why weren't we invited...ne?" a vivacious voice chuckled. Kazeon Bosatsu, the revered Goddess of Mercy turned to her companion who offered no response. A telling water droplet appeared behind the heads of three deities…Konzen wondered how many times would he have to roll his eyes and rolled those violet orbs anyway, "Old jokes make the old crone….."
"Nani?!" snapped the Goddess, "You're not so young yourself, dear nephew Konzen Douji!"
"Che……I'm still younger than you kono baba………and definitely without the wrinkles that define you…"
"NANI!!???" furious veins popped out on the Goddess's forehead, and she immediately whipped out a small compact mirror to her face and started checking. Konzen snickered. "Usae!!!!" a fantastically humongous paper fan the like of which have never been seen before came flying in a direct line of the devilish God, landing a bone whacking crack on his head. Outraged, Konzen let loose a terrorizing roar, his rough hands clamping upon the slender neck of his aunt, "You itekuru jinai!!!!!! How dare you, you most laziest, inefficient, and useless god in this entire hellbound heaven, dare to strike me!!!! ME!!!!!"
"LAZY???!!!! AND WHO ARE YOU TO TALK TO ME ABOUT LAZY!!! You torpidistic slothful schizophrenic!!!!"
"URUSAI! You outrageously-incompetent-flagrantly-shameless-always-think-you're-the-most-worshipped-but-instead-you're-the-finest-ever-insufferable-witchlet!!!!!"
"Witchlet!!?? Witchlet???!! I'll show you a witchlet! You incorrigible nefarious hiding-behind-your-skirt centipede!!!"
"SO???? You fish-on-a-stick racy slanderous look-like-a-refugee-with-a-bag-hanging-on-the-bags-of-your-squint-eyes mosquito!!!!"
"Do you want a mirror??!!! You cow-pat-faced-with-stroppy underclothes that hangs off your over delicate back bone if you actually have one so much so that just for you to stand up you need a fish spine!!!"
"You HAVE a mirror??? Wow, I was so blinded by that insipid compact and thousands and one face reflectors you have hanging around that I completely forgot that you HAVE a mirror!!! Do you WANT me to fetch you ONE????!!!!
"YOU!!!!" splutter, splutter
Toushin Nataku Taishi hoisted his glowing sword upon his shoulder, a dead gentle hand on Taka as everyone else gulped at the warring with words Gods. "Do what you do best, Sukunami san…."
Taka gave a slight bow, a mark of deference to the grave youngish deity, "Hai, toushin sama……genki ka da ne." "Miinasan genki ka da…." A whisper came from the fighter, soft pale white robes billowing after his retreat……..darkness creeping into the void left behind.
"Hey! You cerise shavened head lascivious cockroach!!!"
"WHAT???" bellowed General Kenren Taisho. He took a soaring leap and swept into the foray. "You weltering-like-a-hippopotamus-on-a-Sunday-afternoon tomato!!!"
"Keep off him, you hermaphrodite-so-not-yet-a-woman effacing indecency!!!!"
"WHY YOU jarringly imminent-fate-of-being-cleved-into-two-by-the-grim-reaper-for-cheating-his-death-when-you-should-have-been-five-hundred-years-ago errant!!!"
"GODS DON'T DIE!!! You purulent vacuous headed inane fool!!!!!
"SUSHI breathed limp-biscuit-of-a-stone-rocked-innards-without-so-much-as-single-able-thought-running-through-what-should-be-your-brain-but-which-is-replaced-by-an-ass's-butt cretin!!!!!!!!"
"Pernicious insidious-like-a-creeping-disease-that-takes-over-every-individual-thought-left-in-your-mind if you actually have a mind you pre-deposited rat-brain!!!!"
"Pugnacious intransigent lack-of-appreciation-for-anything common thief!!"
"ME??!! A common thief???? Like your kind is it who likes-to-fondle-small-bright-eyed-kids-without-a-brain crook!!"
"HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAA……………………..well said!! Konzen is a damn paedo………ACK!!!!"
"I'LL TEACH YOU TO CALL ME A DAMN P……"
"LET GO YOU UNPROPITIOUS OUT-OF-REACTION HAIR LIKE A SISSY WITH YOUR EVER VENERABLE SNEER OKUPI!!!!"
"WHAT? LIKE COUSIN LIKE COUSIN, YOU HALF-WITTED-HALF-BLOODED CHILD OF DUBIOUS HERITAGE WITHOUT A CAUSE OF DOUBT TO YOUR MISTAKEN PLACEMENT IN THE ARMY WHEN YOU SHOULD BE A CONCUBINE PERVERTED PIECE OF WOOD!!!!"
"HAH!! LIKE YOU NEVER HAVE YOUR OWN DOSE OF PEEPING ESPECIALLY OVER AT THE 'PRIVATE' DOMAIN OF THE SUPERFLUOUS BODY CURVES LIKE WATERMELONS HYPED ON STEROIDS GODDESS!!!"
"AND JUST WHO ARE YOU REFERRING TO AS WATERMELONS??!! YOU FAILURE-TO-THE-DEPTHS-OF-THE- NEVERENDING-OCEAN-TILL-WE-CAN'T-EVEN-SEE-THAT-YOU-ARE-AN-OUTRAGEOUSLY-PARASITIC ABJECT FAILURE!!!"
"LIKE YOU ARE NOT TOTAL LA-DI-DA BEAUTY QUEEN WHO WAKES EVERYONE UP IN THE MIDST MORNING TO FLING YOUR 100 POUNDS ASSETS AROUND!!"
"AND WHO IS THE ONE WHO DESOLATES EVERY POSSIBLE LIVING CREATURE IN HEAVEN WITH HIS MOANING AND MOPING AND JUST PLAIN DOWNRIGHT WET BLANKET MOOD EVERY SINGLE DAY??? HUH?? WHO IS IT??!!"
"AND YOU ARE JUST AN ABSOLUTE CONVENT CHICK!! IS THAT IT??!!"
"SO YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE IN RELIGION NOW YOU FALSIFIED BURNISH SO BRIGHT THAT IT WILL PROBABLY BURN OUR EYES AWAY, BUT THEN IT'LL PROBABLY BE A GIFT DROPPED FROM HEAVEN ON HIGH TO NOT HAVE TO LOOK AT YOU!!"
As the onslaught squabble continues, a reticent figure stood by the side, quietly laughing at the chaos which was to some part caused by him. Unseen, another diffident character made his way to the small alcove, finally catching Taka's attention as he stood in front of him. A casual flick of a finger at the uproar, and a raised eyebrow communicated Homura's intentions to the prodigious writer. Taka smiled back, "Yeah, it's my work……..care to join in? As the cliché goes…the more the merrier…."
"No, thankyou…." was the demi-god's reply. Nonplussed, Taka raised his eyebrow as the lanky deity effortlessly slumped next to him. Moments of silence between the two, punctuated with ongoing shouts of abuse, when Homura spoke, "Why…."
"Why?" Taka thought, "Because it's what I do…………I was raised from mortal earth to created disaster in perpetual heaven………"
"Nataku's work……………….."
"The Toushin Taishi's avowal."
"I see……………….."
"And his objective?"
"Who knows what goes on in the mind of perturbed divinities…………."
"But…….."
"But?"
"Surely, there's some end…………."
"Ahhhhhh………..yes……..of course………."
"And……….."
"Who would you think is the Toushin's intention……………"
"………………………………………."
"Yes…………….."
One cool blue eye matched those of Taka's…………..the telling heretical golden eye hidden by strands of dark hair……………
"Then should we not awaken the lying Divine being from his gratuitous slumber?"
Taka smiled…..be my guest…
A soft blue light travelled from the palm of the treacherous God to his fingertips, darkening to a blazing deep indigo and flared…
"U-RU-SAEEE!!!"
Hundreds of vivid coloured eyes turned to the waking Kami who was reeling from little dotted stars flying around. A familiar dashing smirk appeared, "Miina anatawa urusae!!! You are all behaving as mindless chickens flapping your futile wings in a cooped up hoar house!!!!"
"WHAT??!!"
The voice softened, "You heard what I said….whores…."
Kami sama blinked, his mouth doing chewing movements old man style, as hundreds of red tinged ears turned bright red.
"Ar…." He murmured.
"LIKE YOU ARE THAT GREAT YOU PENNILESS SENILITY OF A CHICKEN LEGGED OLD MAN WHO CANT EVEN SUPPORT HIS FAMILY EVEN THOUGH HE WEILDS THE SUPREME POWER AND IS SO CORRUPTED THAT IF YOU LOOK UNDER THE TERM VENAL YOU'LL FIND YOUR PICTURE!!!!!!"
Kami-sama woke up properly, "WHAT??!! How dare you….you………bunch of hermaphroditic underlings that can't even carry out a decent order even when following fully written instructions proving such a shredded newspaper filled heads you have!!!"
"Yeah?? Like you are so full of brains yourself, more like full of perverted photos of unknowing goddesses fallen prey to your doddery occultism ways!!"
"You said it, strenuously showing off aunty…"
"AND WHO IS AN AUNTY???!!"
"Hehehehehehee……………..you are kindda…….with the wrinkles, and lines……..and spots…….."
"HAHAHHAHHHAHHAHHAHA……………..kono baba finally gets it!!!"
"Urusai!!! You infidel lowly without a single noble cell in that deteriorating piece of meat you call your body squid!!"
"HAH! So you think you actually exhibit nobleness? Fair princess of the land where everyone pimps for you to the point we wonder what you do in heaven and now we know!!!"
"Leave her alone……….as if you don't offer your 'services' once a while……….you actually get more action than anyone else you hypocritical duplicitous fornication lover till even the night would turn to day several times!!!!!"
"Sour faced vexatious crow!!"
"Cry every day like a baby until you disturb all of our sleep or don't you even sleep you vampirous demon!!"
Days are slipping into the darkness that engulfs…holding lost souls in the sweet stifling embrace…..warm and curious……………..
Days are slipping…..falling into darkness………….sad to claim it, me…………..hold me……….claim me………..take me away to some sweet dark land where the light can never reach…..can never tell me……..can never claim me……………
The imposing alabaster tower rose before him, crackling blackness, bleakness deterring……calling……
Claim me………..claim me now……….
"You lewd slatternly slurry antique!!"
"As if you are not a permanently scowling figurative frivolous fish net!!"
"Hope you get a blackened tooth if you don't already have one with all the sucking you do, you obdurate oaf!!"
"Nonsensical so NOT stylish to the point that you would have to ask the worst dressed person ever on fashion tips, detrimental to everyone else ignoramus!!"
Hai hai………. An unassuming figure slyly slipped out of the grand hall, concealed behind the majestic cloak of the deity who went along with him. Both chuckled, though one blithely, the other a restriction of more sinister knowledge. They made their way away from the din, to the private grounds…………..a work of art is better left to be appreciated by the people themselves….
"Non existent convoluted habitual frequenter of the invalid house!!"
"Flared nosed buffalo milk drinker!!"
"Singularly reprehensible despot!"
"ARrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggg!"
Composed steps descended upon the cold marble patio, gauze veil shushing behind the shapely formed legs. Scarlet lips parted, a kindly smile tinged with sadness…the slightest hint. The Goddess of Mercy slowly approached the petite crouched figure that laid unmoving in the prison stone chair. She placed her slim smooth hand on top of the seat, diffident to the swirling blackness beneath its white exterior, attention still turned towards the breath-swaying scenery beyond the silky lotus-pond.
"Many years….many, many years……young sad Nataku……………
Yes…….many years…………..have you decided to awaken yet….hmm, Nataku? No….perhaps not……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..look….the small growned sakura blossoms are falling again……see their delicate pink petals falling…..oh……falling into the dew pond…………………….kind of like you, small sad Nataku……………….."
It has been many years young Nataku…………..and it was just like this day, so many years ago….that……..young Nataku, have you ever regretted…………..have you ever………………it doesn't matter now………….
She sighed, a musical whisper, her bright grey eyes upon the slow cascading sprinkling of elusive blossoms………and she took her hand off the wintry marble, continuing on her path as if she had never made the stop. Then one hand waved, her misty cloak swirling in the form of fogged snow, "The sakura blossoms are falling……….young Nataku……."
And behind her, a single white blooming bud slowly descended……landing within the open reaching lotus flower floating among its brethren.