Title: Something's Missing
Author: Kathea
Pairing: Jareth/Sarah
Rating: R, it really is this time, for language and adult situations.
AN: Ok folks, this is not the last chapter. This has certainly been a labor for me to finish and typically the ending came in a bright flash of light. I hope you like it and thanks to everyone who reviewed and sent me all the wonderful encouragement. Love, Kathea.
Chapter 10: Worth It In The End
This time Jareth's bedroom door swung open without the proceeding knock. Jareth turned from his window gazing fully ready to berate whoever was stupid enough to enter without permission. Instead, Sarah was standing in the doorway in the same outfit she was wearing when she called to him the second time. The red silk clung to her skin and the short skirt showed off her long legs. She moved slowly past him to the window to watch the Labyrinth. It formed and reformed under her observant gaze, the stone walls changing position and new dead ends being formed by hedges. But the maze and lands beyond the walls of the castle were strangely silent. An eerie quiet blanketed the land and plunged everything into a darkness deeper than night. Without turning around Sarah spoke.
"Reorder time."
"Why?" Jareth asked his curiosity peaked. Could she have possibly figured out a way to beat the darkness?
"If me beating you was the reason for all this starting. Take me back, take us both back and let me choose a different path."
"It won't work."
"Why?" Sarah questioned having thoroughly examined her solution.
"Because the teenaged Sarah will still make the same choice."
"Then take us back as we are now. Before I said the words. I can make a different decision now."
"Why would you do that? What is your reason?" Jareth asked incredulous. "Previously, you would not have done this? What made you change your mind?"
"It's not what you think." Sarah said pinning him with a heated glare. "This place has become my home and I don't want it to be destroyed anymore than you do. And despite our 'activities' earlier, you are not the reason I'm doing this and more to the point YOU have given me no reason to do this. It's my decision."
"Careful, Sarah, I'll only take so much, even from you." Jareth responded with venom in his voice. "I need to speak with Sebal about this, so I'll call for you later." Sarah took the curt dismissal and left without a backward glance. Jareth paced to the window and roared Sebal's name out into the air. Moments later Sebal appeared in Jareth's room looking slightly disheveled. Jareth took in Sebal's flushed face and unbuttoned shirt and began to laugh. "Did I interrupt something?" Jareth asked with an impish grin.
"Nothing that can't be resumed later, Your Majesty." Sebal replied with his usual somber tone. He was relieved to see that Jareth, although slightly disturbed was no longer angry at him. "I'll give your regards to Kilera."
"It seems that your impromptu conversation with our dear guest has encouraged her to find a solution and I need your input."
"Of course, how can I be of service?"
"Sarah wants me to reorder time and take us both back to the day she choose to leave the underground. She wants to make a different choice. I explained to her that her teenage self would make the same choice. But, being clever, she asked that we go back as adults before she said the words."
"I hadn't thought of that, sire."
"Me either." Jareth said slightly disgruntled.
"But you can't take the two of you back. You can only reorder time once per person."
"This I know."
"Of course, your Majesty. Do you think Sarah could transport you back? Is she strong enough to find the right time and place and carry you both?"
"Sebal I hope so, for all our sakes."
Bored, Sarah made her way down to the crèche to find Taylena and Kilera chatting over a late night cup of coffee. The two women motioned her into the room and Sarah joined them at the low table.
"What are you two doing up?" Sarah asked.
"Oh, Sebal got called away and so I thought I'd just have a chat with my friend." Kilera said with a rueful grin.
"I didn't know Sebal was your husband." Sarah said her interest peaked. "How long have you been married?"
"Ten years, next month. But it took me a while to convince him to have kids." Kilera responded.
Taylena interjected with a smile, "But tell her how long it took to get Sebal to come around to the idea of marriage."
"Oh, only about 80 years." Kilera said with a laugh.
"What took so long?" Sarah asked surprised but not shocked considering the abnormally long life span of most underground denizens.
"Well, relationships take a lot of time to work out all the kinks and problems. Sometimes it takes longer than others. But when you find the person that you are supposed to be with, it doesn't matter how long it takes or what you have to go through."
"Can I change topics?" Sarah questioned trying to stay away from such a personal subject.
"Of course." Kilera and Taylena answered in unison, very aware of the reason for Sarah's change of subject.
"I think I've figured out a way to destroy the darkness but I'm not getting a lot of support from Jareth. What can you tell me about reordering time?"
"Kilera, you take this one. I don't mess with that kind of magic." Taylena said turning to the older woman.
"Well. The only rules behind reordering time are that you can only reorder time once per person and that you must absolutely be sure of the time and place that you are going to. It is very easy to get lost when changing time."
"So you mean Jareth can't reorder time for me since he did it the first time I was here?"
"Basically."
"But I could change time for him? I could take us back."
"Yes," Kilera said warily, "but you must be very careful Sarah. You have to be closely connected to the person you are moving with. If you lose them it is impossible to find them again. If you go back too soon or too late the timeline can be distorted."
"I take it," Taylena's smooth voice interrupted. "You have figured out why you are supposed to be here."
"Sort of," Sarah said with a sigh. "I know why the Labyrinth wants me here but not Jareth."
"Do you really not know?"
"How could I? Every time I see him we are either arguing or he's messing with my emotions. I can't figure him out."
"Sarah, my dear, he loves you." Taylena said softly.
"Yeah right," Sarah said with disdain. "He does not love me. Lust; yeah I'll give you that. You have to know somebody to love them."
"Do you?" Taylena queried with a raised eyebrow. "Isn't there are part of you that already knows him, beyond what you have read or learned? Isn't there a deep, basic part of you that matches with a part of him, sort of a link between the two of you?"
"Oh, Taylena, I don't know. I'm not sure what to think or feel anymore. I just feel so angry all the time"
"It'll come to you." Taylena said with a reassuring smile. Just then a crystal appeared on the tabletop and Jareth's image came into view. His voice was full and strong, like he was standing there in the room, when he spoke.
"Ladies, I'm sorry to interrupt your get-together but I need to talk with Sarah."
"That's alright, your Majesty." Kilera answered for them. "Does this mean that Sebal is free now?"
"Yes." Jareth said in with a knowing smile. "Sorry about that."
"It's alright. Sarah will be along shortly." Kilera said and then the crystal disappeared with a quiet 'pop'. Sarah reached across the table to grasp Kilera's and Taylena's hands in her own.
"I just wanted to thank you both for everything. You welcomed me here without hesitation and I appreciate that. Not many people would do that for a stranger and I'm glad to have you both as friends."
"Good luck Sarah, with everything." Taylena responded. Sarah rose from the table and quietly left the little room. Smiling at the memories she had made there. Several minutes later, Sarah was again crossing the doorway into Jareth's room.
"I see you took the long way."
"Well, you didn't say it was urgent." Sarah said in a cruel voice. "What is your decision oh King?"
"Tone!" Jareth barked but Sarah only stared at him in silence. "I've decided that it can't be done. I can't reorder time twice for the same person so we'll have to find another solution."
"Once again, I come to the rescue." Sarah said haughtily. Jareth raised an eyebrow and motioned for her to continue. "I can take us back. I was talking with Taylena and Kilera and THEY said that I could take us back. They explained it all to me."
"I don't think you can do it." Jareth responded.
"You have no faith in me. Just like you thought I wouldn't beat your labyrinth the first time. I guess I really do only have one purpose here." Sarah said frustrated with Jareth's reluctance. This was just an extension of every other day in her life thus far. No one believed in her, no one supported her, and those she thought were closest to her just used her for their own means.
"Sarah. Honestly, it's not that. Reordering time is not a skill you can pick up quickly like transporting yourself, or others, places or conjuring crystals. You must have a crystal clear image of the time and place you are going and a constant link both mental and physical with the person you are moving. This is very hard task and something I try not to do often." Jareth said with sincerity.
Sarah eyed Jareth suspiciously before speaking. "Look Jareth, I understand the inherent dangers in reordering time. I'm not an idiot. The problem is that time is running too short to waste it arguing. So either you take this coming morning to properly teach me how to reorder time or you chance it with me this afternoon. Those are our choices."
"You are right. Go to bed and rest. You'll need all your energy for learning how to do this. There is one condition. You must trust me explicitly. If you don't we'll both get hurt."
Sarah nodded her head curtly and quietly quit the room knowing that she was already hurting, and it was only bound to get worse.
A sharp knocking on Sarah's door roused her from contemplating the fire in the fireplace. She rose to answer the door and was not surprised to find Jareth standing on the other side. Without asking Jareth walked into the room and spun about to face Sarah. He held out his hand imperiously waiting for Sarah to place hers in his.
"Remember, trust is that key to this. If you can't do it now, you never will." Not one to be trumped, Sarah delicately placed her hand in Jareth's large gloved one and they were instantly transported out of the castle. When Sarah opened her eyes, she found herself in an open glade. In the distance, tall trees formed a ring around the open field. The lush green grass at Sarah's feet was dotted with clumps of wildflowers. A stream meandered through the clearing and bumped and gurgled its way over rocks. The grass was warm and springy under her bare feet. Wait, bare feet? I had shoes on. Sarah looked down to see that her skirt and tank top had been replaced with loose flowing pants in a lovely shade of green and a matching camisole. Surprised and a bit flustered at the state of her attire, Sarah looked up to where Jareth should be standing. Jareth clothing had also changed from his usual ensemble to only pants of a similar style and substance as Sarah's. She tore her eyes away from his bare chest and arrogant smile and proceeded to settle herself comfortably on the ground.
"If you think that is how we are going to work on the physical part of this, think again buster. That was a one shot deal."
"Sarah even you should know what happens when people start to assume. I brought you to this particular place for a reason." Jareth sighed and joined Sarah on the ground before he continued. "This place is like a nexus of power in the Underground. The constant flux of magics keeps it peaceful and continually summer, and increases the power of whoever is here. This is a safe place for us to practice and for you to draw energy from." Not just anyone gets to come here, Jareth added under his breath.
"So how do we start?" Sarah asked impatient to begin. The sooner she could fix this problem the sooner she would stop feeling like she owed this world, this man something. And hopefully she'd feel like there wasn't a hole in her heart.
"First, relax. This isn't something to be rushed. You need to be able to control your breathing and be able to instantly reach a trance like state. That state is how we reorder time. You must also physically be in contact with me and mentally. But we'll start with the breathing."
They were positioned across from each other legs crossed Indian style and hands placed palm up on their knees. As the sun shone down, Sarah and Jareth started breathing in concert. Their chests rising and falling in rhythm; the sweet air filling their lungs and calming their spirits. Hours later when Sarah finally opened her eyes and met the mismatched eyes of Jareth she was able to reach a trance state easily and quickly. The anger and frustration had seeped from her mind and body and she was left refreshed and peaceful for the first time in a very long time. Jareth smiled at her and it was so infectious that she could only return the grin. Jareth broke the silence between them, "Now, that you have conquered the trance you need to be able to connect with me. I don't think the physical part will be hard. All you have to do is hold my hand. The mental part will be the worst. You will be able to see everything that is in my mind. And likewise I will see what you are thinking and feeling. The least bit of reluctance on either of our parts means certain failure. Do you understand the kind of trust that I am placing in you by allowing you to see into me? Not even Sebal, my best friend and most trusted court member, has seen the things you'll see."
"Jareth, I understand. But you must also understand that you will be experiencing my thoughts which I don't want to experience most of the time. My past is usually the first thing on my mind and it isn't pleasant. I am trusting you with all of my secrets. If you will trust me then I will trust you. I want this to succeed as much as you do."
Tentatively, Jareth reached for Sarah's left hand, meeting no resistance, he brought it up to his chest and placed her hand lightly over his heart. Sarah, after a deep breath, followed suit and placed Jareth's left hand over her heart. The touch of his bare hand on her skin caused a tingle to run down her spine. Very softly Sarah could hear Jareth speaking to her as she concentrated on the feel of his skin meeting hers.
"Sarah, think about my heart beat. Concentrate on the feel of it. Get used to the idea of being inside of me."
Breathing was getting harder to concentrate on as the warmth of Jareth's bare skin penetrated her hand. Between the heat beneath her hand, the heat pooling in the pit of her stomach, and the heat shining down from the afternoon sun Sarah broke into a sweat and one lone bead slid down the side of her face. Shaking herself loose from her transfixition Sarah focused on the beat of his heart. Closing her eyes, she let the beat travel through her fingers, up her arm, till it settled, resonating in her mind. A quiet thump-thump, thump-thump, until she could no longer distinguish her beat from his. Gently, Sarah could hear Jareth's voice in her mind.
Sarah, come to my voice Sarah. Follow it inside me. Once you get inside my mind it will be easier. I've left the doors unlocked; all you have to do is open them.
Timidly, Sarah reached with her mind until she brushed against the awareness of Jareth. Sarah did see a set of doors, a visual aid, to enter Jareth's mind. Very conscious that he was already near to her entrance, Sarah carefully opened the black wooden doors that suddenly stood before her. They swung silently on their hinges and revealed only blackness beyond.
Step inside Sarah, nothing here can harm you.
As she placed her foot inside the threshold, sconces along the walls blazed to life with a fire that lit the entire space. It was a massive hall with long walls that stretched into the distance seemingly without end. Placed between the sconces were pictures. Scenes of people and places she didn't know; of terrifying creatures and mystical actions.
This is how I remember everything. Your mind will be arranged differently, everyone's mind is arranged according to how they think. Each picture tells a story, a very specific story about my past. They don't just show what happened but also how I felt and what I experienced. Go on, look at the pictures.
The first frame she approached was one with two faces very close together. The faces were of a man and a woman both of almost outrageous beauty. Their faces were close together and seemed to be looking down at something below them. Sweet smiles graced their lips and when Sarah touched the canvas the picture began to move. Much like a movie come to life, Sarah watched as the woman reached down and stroked something. A shining silver ring rode on her left hand and a diadem rested on her fair hair. The man had a possessive arm around the woman and also wore a coronet of sorts.
"Malena, he is perfect. Absolutely perfect, I couldn't love him more."
"Deran," the woman responded. "He is our son, our wonderful son. I want to call him Jareth."
"I think it is a perfect name for a prince."
When Sarah removed her hand from the frame the motion stopped but the emotions that were emanating from the memory still flowed freely. She was suffused with love; the love that Jareth's parents had for him and the hazy, indistinct love that baby Jareth felt for his parents. Wishing she could have felt such a love, Sarah moved on to another picture. It was a picture of two boys, one with fair hair and one with very dark hair. They were obviously playing some game. They both were grinning wildly and held wooden swords in their hands. Sarah brushed the frame with her fingertips and the boys raced wildly in a circle in a walled garden.
"I'll get you Jareth." The dark hair boy called. They could have been twins if not for the hair color.
"Nuh uh, Sebal. I'm going to win." Jareth answered back calmly thrusting his sword up in the air, an exulatant and slightly familiar look on his face. Young Jareth didn't see Sebal prepare to charge and was very surprised to have his friend topple him to the ground.
Sarah moved her hand off the frame, grinning with delight at the antics of the young king. As she continued to walk, she saw scenes of elaborate court ceremonies, the coming of age of the young prince, and sadly the death of both of Jareth's parents. Sarah grieved for him and for herself and she saw and then bypassed that particular scene.
Come further, Sarah, there is something you must see.
Jareth's voice echoed in her head and so she picked up her pace, passing what must have been hundreds of years of memories locked in time. She was quiet startled when the passage suddenly came to a halt and she was greeted with five very recent memories. The first on the far left was of herself rejecting the crystal from Jareth just before she said the words that started this whole fiasco. Sarah stepped closer and for the first time noticed the desperation and hope that washed over his face. Her memories of that event were not so clear as they were clouded by her own confused emotions. The next frame held a picture of again herself, dressed and standing proudly before what she assumed was Jareth when she called him the second time. Sarah hesitated before touching the frame and decided against finding out what Jareth really was thinking that day. The middle picture was Sarah dressed and standing in the doorway to her room at the castle just before the dinner with the Underground nobles. This time she did touch the frame and since she knew what she was going to say and do, Sarah concentrated on the emotions that the scene was emitting. Sarah gasped when she felt the surge of adoration rise from Jareth's memory, it was tinged with amazement at her beauty and amusement with her attitude. Above all else was a feeling that he cherished her. That particular word stuck out among all the other feelings Sarah was receiving. Shocked by the scene Sarah removed her hand and moved on to the next frame. Sarah came face to face with herself without any clothes on. Her head was thrown back and her eyes were closed. Oh, Sarah remembered this moment very well. She blushed as she stared at her own body. Accidentally brushing the picture, Sarah was overwhelmed by Jareth's feelings. The expected lust was there as well as the appreciation for her body and what it would and could do but there was another deeper, firmer, emotion. Love, not the kind that disappears with time, but the kind that endures the hard times and the triumphs. Sarah jerked her hand away as if the framed was burning it. She lowered her eyes as her own emotions threatened to overwhelm her. With so much history how was she ever supposed to accept that this man truly loved her. Her parents said they loved her and then abandoned her. A string of men said they loved her but only loved part of her. Then Jareth came along and trashed all the preconceived notions and half formed ideas Sarah had about love and relationships. Why him? Why did he have to be the one to love her and why couldn't she figure out what it was that she felt for him?
The last frame was not solid and gleaming like that of the previous memories. It was like there was a mist over it and the picture was hazy and only parts of it could be seen. Sarah wondered what this meant and sent a questioning thought to Jareth's mind.
It's a dream. My dream for me and for you.
Sarah looked at the picture again and could see herself and Jareth standing side by side dressed in regal clothing and with crowns on their heads. She could hear the exaltations of the crowds as they hailed their king and queen. Sarah spun on her heels and ran out of the hall and jerked back into her body and snapped her eyes open.
"Sarah there is no need to be angry. I warned you about what you would see." Jareth intoned as Sarah's eyes flashed.
"Well you've had the perfect little life haven't you? And have the rest of mine planned out for me don't you? Well why don't you see what my life has been like and what my dreams are?" Without warning Jareth quickly entered Sarah's mind. There was no door only empty hinges. Large televisions screens were mounted haphazardly around the large room. On one large screen Sarah's adventures through the underground were on constant replay with the voices muted. Other smaller screens showed various episodes of her life. Angry voices shouted from one TV as Sarah replayed the day the Karen had kicked her out of the house. On another was Sarah being angrily left by a handsome man. Jareth watched helplessly as tears began to roll down Sarah's cheeks. When the door slammed in her face Sarah's eyes hardened and her fists clenched. On a nearby set and similar scene was playing out with another man. God, Jareth thought, no wonder she doesn't trust me. There hasn't been a man in her life that hasn't hurt her.
You've got that much right, buster.
Jareth smiled as Sarah's voice echoed in the air. Prominently displayed was the night of the dinner. He was staring at himself as Sarah had seen him. The sound was off but the emotions Sarah was feeling sounded clearly. She was scared and excited and just a little bit lost as Jareth smiled at her. The butterflies in her stomach jumped unmercifully and as much as she tried to deny it the thought of being on Jareth's arm and in his company for the evening was very alluring. Jareth couldn't help but be amused at the variety of emotions Sarah was emitting. As Jareth moved around the room he found some TV's where the screen was scrambled and only bits and pieces could be seen. Flashes appeared of picnics on a meadow, a white dress with blue crystals, and the smile of a small child.
These are my dreams. They've changed a lot from the last time we met. I don't want to be a princess anymore. I want to be happy and have a family. Is that too much to ask?
I guess not, Jareth thought, but that doesn't mean that I can't give you that.
I heard that.
Jareth chuckled and carefully removed himself from Sarah's mind. Simultaneously dropping their hands to their laps, the connection that was so strong lapsed. But not completely not entirely gone; instead there was a faint link but it wasn't new.
"So, do you think we're ready?" Sarah's voice broke his reverie.
"It's the best we're going to get on such short notice." Jareth answered her honestly. "Just one thing before we go back to the castle."
"What?"
"I never meant to hurt you. Now or before."
"I know."
AN: Ok so I thought I'd get this done in this chapter but it just kept going. Please be patient. Also, the descriptions of Jareth's and Sarah's minds is my personal theory of how people categorize their memories.
Author: Kathea
Pairing: Jareth/Sarah
Rating: R, it really is this time, for language and adult situations.
AN: Ok folks, this is not the last chapter. This has certainly been a labor for me to finish and typically the ending came in a bright flash of light. I hope you like it and thanks to everyone who reviewed and sent me all the wonderful encouragement. Love, Kathea.
Chapter 10: Worth It In The End
This time Jareth's bedroom door swung open without the proceeding knock. Jareth turned from his window gazing fully ready to berate whoever was stupid enough to enter without permission. Instead, Sarah was standing in the doorway in the same outfit she was wearing when she called to him the second time. The red silk clung to her skin and the short skirt showed off her long legs. She moved slowly past him to the window to watch the Labyrinth. It formed and reformed under her observant gaze, the stone walls changing position and new dead ends being formed by hedges. But the maze and lands beyond the walls of the castle were strangely silent. An eerie quiet blanketed the land and plunged everything into a darkness deeper than night. Without turning around Sarah spoke.
"Reorder time."
"Why?" Jareth asked his curiosity peaked. Could she have possibly figured out a way to beat the darkness?
"If me beating you was the reason for all this starting. Take me back, take us both back and let me choose a different path."
"It won't work."
"Why?" Sarah questioned having thoroughly examined her solution.
"Because the teenaged Sarah will still make the same choice."
"Then take us back as we are now. Before I said the words. I can make a different decision now."
"Why would you do that? What is your reason?" Jareth asked incredulous. "Previously, you would not have done this? What made you change your mind?"
"It's not what you think." Sarah said pinning him with a heated glare. "This place has become my home and I don't want it to be destroyed anymore than you do. And despite our 'activities' earlier, you are not the reason I'm doing this and more to the point YOU have given me no reason to do this. It's my decision."
"Careful, Sarah, I'll only take so much, even from you." Jareth responded with venom in his voice. "I need to speak with Sebal about this, so I'll call for you later." Sarah took the curt dismissal and left without a backward glance. Jareth paced to the window and roared Sebal's name out into the air. Moments later Sebal appeared in Jareth's room looking slightly disheveled. Jareth took in Sebal's flushed face and unbuttoned shirt and began to laugh. "Did I interrupt something?" Jareth asked with an impish grin.
"Nothing that can't be resumed later, Your Majesty." Sebal replied with his usual somber tone. He was relieved to see that Jareth, although slightly disturbed was no longer angry at him. "I'll give your regards to Kilera."
"It seems that your impromptu conversation with our dear guest has encouraged her to find a solution and I need your input."
"Of course, how can I be of service?"
"Sarah wants me to reorder time and take us both back to the day she choose to leave the underground. She wants to make a different choice. I explained to her that her teenage self would make the same choice. But, being clever, she asked that we go back as adults before she said the words."
"I hadn't thought of that, sire."
"Me either." Jareth said slightly disgruntled.
"But you can't take the two of you back. You can only reorder time once per person."
"This I know."
"Of course, your Majesty. Do you think Sarah could transport you back? Is she strong enough to find the right time and place and carry you both?"
"Sebal I hope so, for all our sakes."
Bored, Sarah made her way down to the crèche to find Taylena and Kilera chatting over a late night cup of coffee. The two women motioned her into the room and Sarah joined them at the low table.
"What are you two doing up?" Sarah asked.
"Oh, Sebal got called away and so I thought I'd just have a chat with my friend." Kilera said with a rueful grin.
"I didn't know Sebal was your husband." Sarah said her interest peaked. "How long have you been married?"
"Ten years, next month. But it took me a while to convince him to have kids." Kilera responded.
Taylena interjected with a smile, "But tell her how long it took to get Sebal to come around to the idea of marriage."
"Oh, only about 80 years." Kilera said with a laugh.
"What took so long?" Sarah asked surprised but not shocked considering the abnormally long life span of most underground denizens.
"Well, relationships take a lot of time to work out all the kinks and problems. Sometimes it takes longer than others. But when you find the person that you are supposed to be with, it doesn't matter how long it takes or what you have to go through."
"Can I change topics?" Sarah questioned trying to stay away from such a personal subject.
"Of course." Kilera and Taylena answered in unison, very aware of the reason for Sarah's change of subject.
"I think I've figured out a way to destroy the darkness but I'm not getting a lot of support from Jareth. What can you tell me about reordering time?"
"Kilera, you take this one. I don't mess with that kind of magic." Taylena said turning to the older woman.
"Well. The only rules behind reordering time are that you can only reorder time once per person and that you must absolutely be sure of the time and place that you are going to. It is very easy to get lost when changing time."
"So you mean Jareth can't reorder time for me since he did it the first time I was here?"
"Basically."
"But I could change time for him? I could take us back."
"Yes," Kilera said warily, "but you must be very careful Sarah. You have to be closely connected to the person you are moving with. If you lose them it is impossible to find them again. If you go back too soon or too late the timeline can be distorted."
"I take it," Taylena's smooth voice interrupted. "You have figured out why you are supposed to be here."
"Sort of," Sarah said with a sigh. "I know why the Labyrinth wants me here but not Jareth."
"Do you really not know?"
"How could I? Every time I see him we are either arguing or he's messing with my emotions. I can't figure him out."
"Sarah, my dear, he loves you." Taylena said softly.
"Yeah right," Sarah said with disdain. "He does not love me. Lust; yeah I'll give you that. You have to know somebody to love them."
"Do you?" Taylena queried with a raised eyebrow. "Isn't there are part of you that already knows him, beyond what you have read or learned? Isn't there a deep, basic part of you that matches with a part of him, sort of a link between the two of you?"
"Oh, Taylena, I don't know. I'm not sure what to think or feel anymore. I just feel so angry all the time"
"It'll come to you." Taylena said with a reassuring smile. Just then a crystal appeared on the tabletop and Jareth's image came into view. His voice was full and strong, like he was standing there in the room, when he spoke.
"Ladies, I'm sorry to interrupt your get-together but I need to talk with Sarah."
"That's alright, your Majesty." Kilera answered for them. "Does this mean that Sebal is free now?"
"Yes." Jareth said in with a knowing smile. "Sorry about that."
"It's alright. Sarah will be along shortly." Kilera said and then the crystal disappeared with a quiet 'pop'. Sarah reached across the table to grasp Kilera's and Taylena's hands in her own.
"I just wanted to thank you both for everything. You welcomed me here without hesitation and I appreciate that. Not many people would do that for a stranger and I'm glad to have you both as friends."
"Good luck Sarah, with everything." Taylena responded. Sarah rose from the table and quietly left the little room. Smiling at the memories she had made there. Several minutes later, Sarah was again crossing the doorway into Jareth's room.
"I see you took the long way."
"Well, you didn't say it was urgent." Sarah said in a cruel voice. "What is your decision oh King?"
"Tone!" Jareth barked but Sarah only stared at him in silence. "I've decided that it can't be done. I can't reorder time twice for the same person so we'll have to find another solution."
"Once again, I come to the rescue." Sarah said haughtily. Jareth raised an eyebrow and motioned for her to continue. "I can take us back. I was talking with Taylena and Kilera and THEY said that I could take us back. They explained it all to me."
"I don't think you can do it." Jareth responded.
"You have no faith in me. Just like you thought I wouldn't beat your labyrinth the first time. I guess I really do only have one purpose here." Sarah said frustrated with Jareth's reluctance. This was just an extension of every other day in her life thus far. No one believed in her, no one supported her, and those she thought were closest to her just used her for their own means.
"Sarah. Honestly, it's not that. Reordering time is not a skill you can pick up quickly like transporting yourself, or others, places or conjuring crystals. You must have a crystal clear image of the time and place you are going and a constant link both mental and physical with the person you are moving. This is very hard task and something I try not to do often." Jareth said with sincerity.
Sarah eyed Jareth suspiciously before speaking. "Look Jareth, I understand the inherent dangers in reordering time. I'm not an idiot. The problem is that time is running too short to waste it arguing. So either you take this coming morning to properly teach me how to reorder time or you chance it with me this afternoon. Those are our choices."
"You are right. Go to bed and rest. You'll need all your energy for learning how to do this. There is one condition. You must trust me explicitly. If you don't we'll both get hurt."
Sarah nodded her head curtly and quietly quit the room knowing that she was already hurting, and it was only bound to get worse.
A sharp knocking on Sarah's door roused her from contemplating the fire in the fireplace. She rose to answer the door and was not surprised to find Jareth standing on the other side. Without asking Jareth walked into the room and spun about to face Sarah. He held out his hand imperiously waiting for Sarah to place hers in his.
"Remember, trust is that key to this. If you can't do it now, you never will." Not one to be trumped, Sarah delicately placed her hand in Jareth's large gloved one and they were instantly transported out of the castle. When Sarah opened her eyes, she found herself in an open glade. In the distance, tall trees formed a ring around the open field. The lush green grass at Sarah's feet was dotted with clumps of wildflowers. A stream meandered through the clearing and bumped and gurgled its way over rocks. The grass was warm and springy under her bare feet. Wait, bare feet? I had shoes on. Sarah looked down to see that her skirt and tank top had been replaced with loose flowing pants in a lovely shade of green and a matching camisole. Surprised and a bit flustered at the state of her attire, Sarah looked up to where Jareth should be standing. Jareth clothing had also changed from his usual ensemble to only pants of a similar style and substance as Sarah's. She tore her eyes away from his bare chest and arrogant smile and proceeded to settle herself comfortably on the ground.
"If you think that is how we are going to work on the physical part of this, think again buster. That was a one shot deal."
"Sarah even you should know what happens when people start to assume. I brought you to this particular place for a reason." Jareth sighed and joined Sarah on the ground before he continued. "This place is like a nexus of power in the Underground. The constant flux of magics keeps it peaceful and continually summer, and increases the power of whoever is here. This is a safe place for us to practice and for you to draw energy from." Not just anyone gets to come here, Jareth added under his breath.
"So how do we start?" Sarah asked impatient to begin. The sooner she could fix this problem the sooner she would stop feeling like she owed this world, this man something. And hopefully she'd feel like there wasn't a hole in her heart.
"First, relax. This isn't something to be rushed. You need to be able to control your breathing and be able to instantly reach a trance like state. That state is how we reorder time. You must also physically be in contact with me and mentally. But we'll start with the breathing."
They were positioned across from each other legs crossed Indian style and hands placed palm up on their knees. As the sun shone down, Sarah and Jareth started breathing in concert. Their chests rising and falling in rhythm; the sweet air filling their lungs and calming their spirits. Hours later when Sarah finally opened her eyes and met the mismatched eyes of Jareth she was able to reach a trance state easily and quickly. The anger and frustration had seeped from her mind and body and she was left refreshed and peaceful for the first time in a very long time. Jareth smiled at her and it was so infectious that she could only return the grin. Jareth broke the silence between them, "Now, that you have conquered the trance you need to be able to connect with me. I don't think the physical part will be hard. All you have to do is hold my hand. The mental part will be the worst. You will be able to see everything that is in my mind. And likewise I will see what you are thinking and feeling. The least bit of reluctance on either of our parts means certain failure. Do you understand the kind of trust that I am placing in you by allowing you to see into me? Not even Sebal, my best friend and most trusted court member, has seen the things you'll see."
"Jareth, I understand. But you must also understand that you will be experiencing my thoughts which I don't want to experience most of the time. My past is usually the first thing on my mind and it isn't pleasant. I am trusting you with all of my secrets. If you will trust me then I will trust you. I want this to succeed as much as you do."
Tentatively, Jareth reached for Sarah's left hand, meeting no resistance, he brought it up to his chest and placed her hand lightly over his heart. Sarah, after a deep breath, followed suit and placed Jareth's left hand over her heart. The touch of his bare hand on her skin caused a tingle to run down her spine. Very softly Sarah could hear Jareth speaking to her as she concentrated on the feel of his skin meeting hers.
"Sarah, think about my heart beat. Concentrate on the feel of it. Get used to the idea of being inside of me."
Breathing was getting harder to concentrate on as the warmth of Jareth's bare skin penetrated her hand. Between the heat beneath her hand, the heat pooling in the pit of her stomach, and the heat shining down from the afternoon sun Sarah broke into a sweat and one lone bead slid down the side of her face. Shaking herself loose from her transfixition Sarah focused on the beat of his heart. Closing her eyes, she let the beat travel through her fingers, up her arm, till it settled, resonating in her mind. A quiet thump-thump, thump-thump, until she could no longer distinguish her beat from his. Gently, Sarah could hear Jareth's voice in her mind.
Sarah, come to my voice Sarah. Follow it inside me. Once you get inside my mind it will be easier. I've left the doors unlocked; all you have to do is open them.
Timidly, Sarah reached with her mind until she brushed against the awareness of Jareth. Sarah did see a set of doors, a visual aid, to enter Jareth's mind. Very conscious that he was already near to her entrance, Sarah carefully opened the black wooden doors that suddenly stood before her. They swung silently on their hinges and revealed only blackness beyond.
Step inside Sarah, nothing here can harm you.
As she placed her foot inside the threshold, sconces along the walls blazed to life with a fire that lit the entire space. It was a massive hall with long walls that stretched into the distance seemingly without end. Placed between the sconces were pictures. Scenes of people and places she didn't know; of terrifying creatures and mystical actions.
This is how I remember everything. Your mind will be arranged differently, everyone's mind is arranged according to how they think. Each picture tells a story, a very specific story about my past. They don't just show what happened but also how I felt and what I experienced. Go on, look at the pictures.
The first frame she approached was one with two faces very close together. The faces were of a man and a woman both of almost outrageous beauty. Their faces were close together and seemed to be looking down at something below them. Sweet smiles graced their lips and when Sarah touched the canvas the picture began to move. Much like a movie come to life, Sarah watched as the woman reached down and stroked something. A shining silver ring rode on her left hand and a diadem rested on her fair hair. The man had a possessive arm around the woman and also wore a coronet of sorts.
"Malena, he is perfect. Absolutely perfect, I couldn't love him more."
"Deran," the woman responded. "He is our son, our wonderful son. I want to call him Jareth."
"I think it is a perfect name for a prince."
When Sarah removed her hand from the frame the motion stopped but the emotions that were emanating from the memory still flowed freely. She was suffused with love; the love that Jareth's parents had for him and the hazy, indistinct love that baby Jareth felt for his parents. Wishing she could have felt such a love, Sarah moved on to another picture. It was a picture of two boys, one with fair hair and one with very dark hair. They were obviously playing some game. They both were grinning wildly and held wooden swords in their hands. Sarah brushed the frame with her fingertips and the boys raced wildly in a circle in a walled garden.
"I'll get you Jareth." The dark hair boy called. They could have been twins if not for the hair color.
"Nuh uh, Sebal. I'm going to win." Jareth answered back calmly thrusting his sword up in the air, an exulatant and slightly familiar look on his face. Young Jareth didn't see Sebal prepare to charge and was very surprised to have his friend topple him to the ground.
Sarah moved her hand off the frame, grinning with delight at the antics of the young king. As she continued to walk, she saw scenes of elaborate court ceremonies, the coming of age of the young prince, and sadly the death of both of Jareth's parents. Sarah grieved for him and for herself and she saw and then bypassed that particular scene.
Come further, Sarah, there is something you must see.
Jareth's voice echoed in her head and so she picked up her pace, passing what must have been hundreds of years of memories locked in time. She was quiet startled when the passage suddenly came to a halt and she was greeted with five very recent memories. The first on the far left was of herself rejecting the crystal from Jareth just before she said the words that started this whole fiasco. Sarah stepped closer and for the first time noticed the desperation and hope that washed over his face. Her memories of that event were not so clear as they were clouded by her own confused emotions. The next frame held a picture of again herself, dressed and standing proudly before what she assumed was Jareth when she called him the second time. Sarah hesitated before touching the frame and decided against finding out what Jareth really was thinking that day. The middle picture was Sarah dressed and standing in the doorway to her room at the castle just before the dinner with the Underground nobles. This time she did touch the frame and since she knew what she was going to say and do, Sarah concentrated on the emotions that the scene was emitting. Sarah gasped when she felt the surge of adoration rise from Jareth's memory, it was tinged with amazement at her beauty and amusement with her attitude. Above all else was a feeling that he cherished her. That particular word stuck out among all the other feelings Sarah was receiving. Shocked by the scene Sarah removed her hand and moved on to the next frame. Sarah came face to face with herself without any clothes on. Her head was thrown back and her eyes were closed. Oh, Sarah remembered this moment very well. She blushed as she stared at her own body. Accidentally brushing the picture, Sarah was overwhelmed by Jareth's feelings. The expected lust was there as well as the appreciation for her body and what it would and could do but there was another deeper, firmer, emotion. Love, not the kind that disappears with time, but the kind that endures the hard times and the triumphs. Sarah jerked her hand away as if the framed was burning it. She lowered her eyes as her own emotions threatened to overwhelm her. With so much history how was she ever supposed to accept that this man truly loved her. Her parents said they loved her and then abandoned her. A string of men said they loved her but only loved part of her. Then Jareth came along and trashed all the preconceived notions and half formed ideas Sarah had about love and relationships. Why him? Why did he have to be the one to love her and why couldn't she figure out what it was that she felt for him?
The last frame was not solid and gleaming like that of the previous memories. It was like there was a mist over it and the picture was hazy and only parts of it could be seen. Sarah wondered what this meant and sent a questioning thought to Jareth's mind.
It's a dream. My dream for me and for you.
Sarah looked at the picture again and could see herself and Jareth standing side by side dressed in regal clothing and with crowns on their heads. She could hear the exaltations of the crowds as they hailed their king and queen. Sarah spun on her heels and ran out of the hall and jerked back into her body and snapped her eyes open.
"Sarah there is no need to be angry. I warned you about what you would see." Jareth intoned as Sarah's eyes flashed.
"Well you've had the perfect little life haven't you? And have the rest of mine planned out for me don't you? Well why don't you see what my life has been like and what my dreams are?" Without warning Jareth quickly entered Sarah's mind. There was no door only empty hinges. Large televisions screens were mounted haphazardly around the large room. On one large screen Sarah's adventures through the underground were on constant replay with the voices muted. Other smaller screens showed various episodes of her life. Angry voices shouted from one TV as Sarah replayed the day the Karen had kicked her out of the house. On another was Sarah being angrily left by a handsome man. Jareth watched helplessly as tears began to roll down Sarah's cheeks. When the door slammed in her face Sarah's eyes hardened and her fists clenched. On a nearby set and similar scene was playing out with another man. God, Jareth thought, no wonder she doesn't trust me. There hasn't been a man in her life that hasn't hurt her.
You've got that much right, buster.
Jareth smiled as Sarah's voice echoed in the air. Prominently displayed was the night of the dinner. He was staring at himself as Sarah had seen him. The sound was off but the emotions Sarah was feeling sounded clearly. She was scared and excited and just a little bit lost as Jareth smiled at her. The butterflies in her stomach jumped unmercifully and as much as she tried to deny it the thought of being on Jareth's arm and in his company for the evening was very alluring. Jareth couldn't help but be amused at the variety of emotions Sarah was emitting. As Jareth moved around the room he found some TV's where the screen was scrambled and only bits and pieces could be seen. Flashes appeared of picnics on a meadow, a white dress with blue crystals, and the smile of a small child.
These are my dreams. They've changed a lot from the last time we met. I don't want to be a princess anymore. I want to be happy and have a family. Is that too much to ask?
I guess not, Jareth thought, but that doesn't mean that I can't give you that.
I heard that.
Jareth chuckled and carefully removed himself from Sarah's mind. Simultaneously dropping their hands to their laps, the connection that was so strong lapsed. But not completely not entirely gone; instead there was a faint link but it wasn't new.
"So, do you think we're ready?" Sarah's voice broke his reverie.
"It's the best we're going to get on such short notice." Jareth answered her honestly. "Just one thing before we go back to the castle."
"What?"
"I never meant to hurt you. Now or before."
"I know."
AN: Ok so I thought I'd get this done in this chapter but it just kept going. Please be patient. Also, the descriptions of Jareth's and Sarah's minds is my personal theory of how people categorize their memories.