RKG: Hello. And welcome to Chapter 3. This fic is a hit! = - =

YKG: Yes, it is.

RKG: Unfortunately, we don't own Inu-Yasha otherwise I'd be married to Kouga!

YKG: We'd also like to thank the reviewers!

RKG: We'd just like to point out to Stephanie, thanks for the review. But Shippo is supposed to interrupt Miroku and Sango. This is a fic dedicated to the ruination of romantic moments between Miroku and Sango. No like, no read.

Chapter Three

Dinner

Miroku was in the middle of picking a flower when he got a tap on the back. He spun around, hoping to see Sango but there was no one. He checked to the left. Then, he checked the right.

"Behind you, silly houshi!" Shippo squeaked.

"Where's Sango?"

"She said she was going to sneak off to go to the hot springs and I wasn't supposed to tell you . . . Oh!" Shippo cried. Realizing his mistake, he sat down, assumed fetal position, and began rocking back and forth. His tail curled around his face and Miroku got nervous.

"Aw, it's okay, I won't tell." Miroku patted Shippo's tail awkwardly.

"Really?" came the muffled reply.

"Yes. It's not that big of a deal. Sango will never know. And I won't sneak over. I'm going to prove I'm a great guy and that I do love her."

"That was obvious." Came the still muffled reply.

"Really? I always thought she, well that she hated my guts—"

"Naw, just your wandering hands. Though, you do grope her the most."

"You noticed that?"

"Anyone could tell. If there was a loud bang it's one of two things: one, you're being maimed by Sango for wandering hands or Inu-Yasha is slamming in the ground for being a goon."

"I see." Miroku sweat dropped.

"Well, when you're two feet tall, you really hear rather than see."

"Now, you're nearly six feet."

"Six foot three inches and nine-sixteenths."

"Riight."

Shippo removed his tail and peered up at the sky.

"I'm hungry!" he whined.

"Go make dinner then."

"No way. Loser!"

Miroku remembered the bet and groaned.

"Just think of it as making dinner for Sango! Completely romantic! Chicks dig that stuff."

"How would you know?"

"I have to look for a mate. Fifty's about time to get one."

"Holy gorgonzola. You're fifty!"

"Well, I know I don't look it. But that's the way of kitsune. YOUTH is freedom. Now, go on. I'm hungry!"

Miroku looked at Shippo oddly and began walking back. Twenty paces later, he looked back. Shippo was picking dandelions.

"Aren't you coming?" Miroku called.

"Sango asked for me to wait and make sure that you got started on dinner so she could finish her bath."

"How is it that everywhere we go there's a hot spring?"

"Plot hole?"

"Works for me."

Miroku disappeared out of sight between the trees. When he was gone, Shippo began whistling. Sango appeared from between the trees behind him. Sango sat down by Shippo.

"He really does love me, then?"

"Yep. How did I do?"

"You did a wonderful job acting. And you said everything I asked you to."

"Absolutely. Payment?"

Sango produced a package of one hundred lollipops Kagome had given her a while ago.

Sango was happy. Her little 'test' had proven Miroku actually loved her. And all it had cost her was a bag of sugar on sticks!

"Now what?" Sango asked.

"What do you—rip—mean?" Shippo asked, tearing open a lollipop wrapper.

"Well, how do I show him that I love him back?"

"Hmm." Shippo said around a lollipop. "I have an idea. Tomorrow wake up at dawn, right?"

"Okay." Sango agreed skeptical.

"Then, watch the sunrise with him."

"Sounds beautiful."

"As the sun rises, inch closer. Then, when you're touching him, snuggle up to him. Then, tell him you love him and that you want to be with him, and only him forever. Seal it with a kiss and you're a match made in heaven."

"When did you become a romantic?"

"The kitsune back at the burrow who were looking for male mates said that romantic stuff."

"You're looking for a mate."

"Like I said, I am over fifty."

"You don't seem to be so old."

"I'm not, demons age slowly. I still got another couple hundred of years left."

"Jeez. Kids these days grow up so fast." Sango remarked.

"I'm still a kid!" Shippo insisted with three lollipops in his mouth at once.

"I'd have to agree."

Back at the campsite. . .

Miroku hurriedly rebuilt the fire. He looked around for some herbs and found some edible plants conveniently close the campsite. He headed to the camp site once more and fetched a bowl and pestle. He quickly darted to the river and ground the herbs. Adding a little water and some non-poisonous mushrooms, he had made a delicious sauce, which he decided to sample.

But what meat would they have? They always had fish. Fish, fish, fish. Well, another night of fish wouldn't kill them.

Miroku rolled up his sleeves and the hem of his robes, so he could enter the river. He stood still and quickly caught five pickerel. A/N: It's an actual type of fish that does resemble a pickle!

Returning to the campsite, he stirred the fire and found two forked sticks and a long stick that was sturdy enough to roast three fish.

Miroku began roasting the fish and finding leaves for plates. As he found a third leaf, he saw Shippo and Sango walking back from the field. Shippo and Sango seemed too close for Miroku's comfort. Shippo was hitting on Sango! Miroku thought.

"Shippo, could I have a word with you?" called Miroku.

"Huh? Sure!" Shippo called back scampering over to Miroku.

Miroku tugged his arm and pulled Shippo over and sat him behind some trees. He paced in front of the kitsune.

"Miroku, you all right, man? You're completely tense." Shippo stated.

"Stop it."

"Stop what? Asking you questions?"

"Stop hitting on Sango." Miroku ordered through clenched teeth. "Or so help me, I'll kill you."

Shippo stared at Miroku confused for a couple of minutes. Then, Shippo burst out laughing.

"You thought I was hitting on Sango? C'mon, she's a human!"

"Are you making fun of her?"

"No. I'm into kitsune. And wolf demon but that's a weird thing."

"You're insane."

"You're insane. 'Are you hitting on Sango?' Please, all I've done is tried to push you two together. What would you do without me?"

"Lead a happy and normal life."

TO BE CONTINUED. . .

RKG: Longer this time.

YKG: Five more reviews. Thank you to those that have reviewed thus far!