Well, here we are again, my friends. Its been a long time, huh? I have a
confession to make. Don't think me a ditz, okay? I lost the notebook that
this story is in. Okay, that sounds like a ditzy thing to do anyway...Alas,
poor me. Enough of my whinning. I'll get to the point of this author's
note. I was away so long because I was trying my hand at my own works. On
fictionpress.net. Not much support there. So here I am, crawling back with
my tail between my legs so to speak. Forgive me? I hope so.
Disclaimer: I own no one from the Harry Potter books. They--and all of the places, and other such nouns--belong to the brillant mind of J.K.Rowling. Lucky woman.
Summary: On one hand, we have Remus: the quiet kind, a good boy. Mostly doing what's right. Sure, he's gay. No one knows about it. But now he's in love. On the other hand, Sirius: the troublemaker, gay, in love, much like Remus. The odds keep them apart, but can Fate bring them together?
Chapter 9
Remus's POV
THE NEXT MORNING...
Even as I sit at the House table in the Great Hall, listening to everyone else around me chattering happily, I don't hear any of it. I'm not a part of it. The converstaions are like whispers on the wind, there but not really. The people are like strangers in a crowd. I am lost in a sea of heartache and no one can help me.
I vaguely notice James, Sirius and Peter sit near me. I don't speak. What is there to say? My most trusted friend is sleeping with the love of my life. I walked in on the aftermath last night. They don't know I know. I won't let on. All I really want is for Sirius to be happy. If letting James have him is what it takes, then so be it. I will be forever doomed to walk alone, mourning a love that never was and probably never would have been. Werewolves are to be loners, anyway. What in the world made me think that I could ever have a chance at happiness?
"So, what do you say, Moony?"
I look up at James with haunted eyes. He wouldn't want to hear what I have to say. No, I don't want to go on some stupid monthly adventure. Not with him, and not with Sirius.
"Moony? What's wrong?"
"Nothing, Prongs," I hear my voice say, as if from a place far from here. "I didn't sleep well last night. Worrying about that Potions quiz and all. I'm not up for an adventure tonight. Go on without me and tell me how it goes, all right?"
"All right." James looks as if he is really worried. Of course he is. He is my friend, right? Yes. It isn't his fault that I was too chicken to tell Sirius I loved him. It isn't his fault that Sirius was so infatuated with him that he was blind to everyone else. Before I know it, its time for first class.
Dreams of Sirius kept me drifting in and out of sleep last night. No matter what I try, I cannot get him off my mind. He's like a drug. I'm severly addicted. When it comes right down to it, though, I want to be addicted. I want to drown in those eyes. I want to be taken in by that smile. I want him. Moreover, I want him to want me.
I walk slowly down the hallyway to the Charms classroom. We have double Charms with Ravenclaw today. I just want to sleep. How I wish it was Saturday. I really need a Hogsmade weekend to clear my head.
Surprisingly, I am the first person in the classroom. Thankfully I have some time to sleep. I lay my head down on my desk and fall into a dreamless sleep.
"Hey, Remus, wake up!"
Someone is tapping me on my shoulder. That is always annoying. I groan and swat half-heartedly at the hand. The person is persistant and keeps up the tapping. My name is suddenly one of the most annoying sounds on the Earth.
"No, you're doing it wrong! Do this!"
A second voice joins the first. Now someone is blowing in my ear. That sure is one way to wake me up. Its also one way to...stimulate me and certain aspects of my body.
I sit up quickly. Sirius backs up away from my ear. Why, oh why, did it have to be Sirius? I could handle it being anyone else, but not him, not now.
"Remi!" a female voice squeals.
Two strong female arms are thrown around my neck to hug me tight. My cheek is pressed to another, softer, one. The scent of strawberries floods my nostrils as my nose is buried in curly brown hair. I instantly know who it is: Hope.
"Hullo, Hope," I manage to say through the strong grip she has on my neck.
"I missed you! Did you miss me?"
"Of course, Hope."
A snort souns from somewhere beside me. Who...? Surely it couldn't have been Sirius making that jealous sound. It came from his direction, but... No, it couldn't have been him. Wishful thinking...
"Class, please be seated and we will start right away!" Tiny Professor Flitwick is perched on his stack of books behind his desk. The class came to order quickly after his request. Hope scrouged Sirius out of the seat beside me. She sits her things out neatly on her deskspace. People are staring at me... I can feel their eyes on the back of my head. Why are they staring? Is it because of Hope? It must be because of her... She is a strange one.
Later that day finds me sitting outside, working on Charms homework, Hope chattering happily beside me. I pause every now and then to answer her.
"Your friends don't seem to like me very much," Hope says out of nowhere.
"What gives you that idea, Hope? They're a friendly bunch. I'm sure they like you."
"I doubt it. Look over there."
I look over where Hope points. Sirius, James, and Peter are sitting under our regular tree, hunched over a scrap of parchment. Sirius is glaring, James looks as if he is plotting, and Pete is following Sirius's lead. What are they looking like that for?
They see me looking and quickly shove the paper away. They're plotting something. What can it be?
Disclaimer: I own no one from the Harry Potter books. They--and all of the places, and other such nouns--belong to the brillant mind of J.K.Rowling. Lucky woman.
Summary: On one hand, we have Remus: the quiet kind, a good boy. Mostly doing what's right. Sure, he's gay. No one knows about it. But now he's in love. On the other hand, Sirius: the troublemaker, gay, in love, much like Remus. The odds keep them apart, but can Fate bring them together?
Chapter 9
Remus's POV
THE NEXT MORNING...
Even as I sit at the House table in the Great Hall, listening to everyone else around me chattering happily, I don't hear any of it. I'm not a part of it. The converstaions are like whispers on the wind, there but not really. The people are like strangers in a crowd. I am lost in a sea of heartache and no one can help me.
I vaguely notice James, Sirius and Peter sit near me. I don't speak. What is there to say? My most trusted friend is sleeping with the love of my life. I walked in on the aftermath last night. They don't know I know. I won't let on. All I really want is for Sirius to be happy. If letting James have him is what it takes, then so be it. I will be forever doomed to walk alone, mourning a love that never was and probably never would have been. Werewolves are to be loners, anyway. What in the world made me think that I could ever have a chance at happiness?
"So, what do you say, Moony?"
I look up at James with haunted eyes. He wouldn't want to hear what I have to say. No, I don't want to go on some stupid monthly adventure. Not with him, and not with Sirius.
"Moony? What's wrong?"
"Nothing, Prongs," I hear my voice say, as if from a place far from here. "I didn't sleep well last night. Worrying about that Potions quiz and all. I'm not up for an adventure tonight. Go on without me and tell me how it goes, all right?"
"All right." James looks as if he is really worried. Of course he is. He is my friend, right? Yes. It isn't his fault that I was too chicken to tell Sirius I loved him. It isn't his fault that Sirius was so infatuated with him that he was blind to everyone else. Before I know it, its time for first class.
Dreams of Sirius kept me drifting in and out of sleep last night. No matter what I try, I cannot get him off my mind. He's like a drug. I'm severly addicted. When it comes right down to it, though, I want to be addicted. I want to drown in those eyes. I want to be taken in by that smile. I want him. Moreover, I want him to want me.
I walk slowly down the hallyway to the Charms classroom. We have double Charms with Ravenclaw today. I just want to sleep. How I wish it was Saturday. I really need a Hogsmade weekend to clear my head.
Surprisingly, I am the first person in the classroom. Thankfully I have some time to sleep. I lay my head down on my desk and fall into a dreamless sleep.
"Hey, Remus, wake up!"
Someone is tapping me on my shoulder. That is always annoying. I groan and swat half-heartedly at the hand. The person is persistant and keeps up the tapping. My name is suddenly one of the most annoying sounds on the Earth.
"No, you're doing it wrong! Do this!"
A second voice joins the first. Now someone is blowing in my ear. That sure is one way to wake me up. Its also one way to...stimulate me and certain aspects of my body.
I sit up quickly. Sirius backs up away from my ear. Why, oh why, did it have to be Sirius? I could handle it being anyone else, but not him, not now.
"Remi!" a female voice squeals.
Two strong female arms are thrown around my neck to hug me tight. My cheek is pressed to another, softer, one. The scent of strawberries floods my nostrils as my nose is buried in curly brown hair. I instantly know who it is: Hope.
"Hullo, Hope," I manage to say through the strong grip she has on my neck.
"I missed you! Did you miss me?"
"Of course, Hope."
A snort souns from somewhere beside me. Who...? Surely it couldn't have been Sirius making that jealous sound. It came from his direction, but... No, it couldn't have been him. Wishful thinking...
"Class, please be seated and we will start right away!" Tiny Professor Flitwick is perched on his stack of books behind his desk. The class came to order quickly after his request. Hope scrouged Sirius out of the seat beside me. She sits her things out neatly on her deskspace. People are staring at me... I can feel their eyes on the back of my head. Why are they staring? Is it because of Hope? It must be because of her... She is a strange one.
Later that day finds me sitting outside, working on Charms homework, Hope chattering happily beside me. I pause every now and then to answer her.
"Your friends don't seem to like me very much," Hope says out of nowhere.
"What gives you that idea, Hope? They're a friendly bunch. I'm sure they like you."
"I doubt it. Look over there."
I look over where Hope points. Sirius, James, and Peter are sitting under our regular tree, hunched over a scrap of parchment. Sirius is glaring, James looks as if he is plotting, and Pete is following Sirius's lead. What are they looking like that for?
They see me looking and quickly shove the paper away. They're plotting something. What can it be?