First of all, special thanks to all of those who reviewed my story. The
criticism was very good, at least now I know what major mistakes I have
made.
To all the first six reviewers of my story, I'm sorry that you cant find
your reviews in my file. Being an extremely stupid idiot, as well as a
newbie in FF.net, I wanted to make some changes in my story, and deleted
the whole thing just to change the P.S note. If you look back into the
first chapter, you will notice a few changes. Please review the first
chapter again and tell me what you think about it.
Responses: (new)
Starry: thanks for your offer! And I'm very glad you like my story! Question: do you know what are the elven kinslayer wars about? I think it's in the Silmarillion, but I did not read it. I just can't find the book... Also, do you want to be my beta reader?
Gollum-girl: Thank you!
Melissa(): Glad you like it! An elven pregnancy lasts for a mortal year, but an elven year lasts for 144 human years, so its perfectly fine for elves to get pregnant twice a year. Remember, this is written from an elven point of view.
Insane elven pirate: ok! I hope this is soon enough for you!
Mercury adept: OK... what mistakes? Your eyes must be really sharp... you can be my beta reader, if you want to!
Vicki Turner: Thank you very much! Is this fast enough for you? I'm really busy, this is the fastest I could update!
(Old) Sorry, I deleted the story to redo it, so now all your reviews are gone!
Stardreamer9: thank you for enjoying it. What do you mean by 'sweet'? oh, and an elven year is 144 human years, so it is possible for them to have three children in a year since this is written form an elven point of view. But anyway, I changed it to two children, I hope that's better, and I made them have fewer children - from nine to five. And, what are the kinslayer wars? I have only heard of them among the humans. Is it in the Silmarillion? I can't find that book, so please explain the wars to me so I can have a better understanding. Forgive me for my ignorance, but it is not my fault if I cannot find that book. And no, the ps note was not to draw flame attacks, but as you can see, I have changed it so it is not so outright. It was so outright because right before I posted this story, I read an incredibly brutal and disgusting story on lotr, and I felt extremely pressed to tell people to stop writing those kinds of stories. Apologies for the "guardian of Tolkien" thing. I did not mean for it to sound this way. You know, you are very just in your judgment – so – can you be my beta reader? I think I am in badly in need of someone to tone down my extreme feelings!
Neld: Erm...was that in the Silmarillion? Sorry, I did not read it. Errr... ok, so you were very right about that bit...
Das Blume: my name was nice? Thanks! Yes, I certainly agree with you about Elrond and Thranduil. Though Elrond's lineage is far greater. I also changed the children bit. Now they only have five children. And one elven year is 144 human years since this is written from the elven point of view. Erm... Celeborn? Yeah, he renamed Mirkwood with Thranduil after Sauron is defeated, so... and Galadriel as a possessive "wanna rule maiden"? I'll have to think about that.
Mistopurr: Really!? Thanks, I am already on a 'favourites' list, and this is only my first story! Yes! Don't worry about my feelings and the comments, but thanks for being so thoughtful! Yeah, you're right about the slash thing, you don't know how much criticism I received just for that! Sheesh...
Ash49: Thanks; glad you were at least interested in my story. Ok, I modified the ps note so that it was not so outright, and –my age will remain a secret – you're right on the 'barbaric thing, so I erased it. And you didn't change my views on slash, but at least I'm not so irked out by it now. Yes, and about Ian Mckellen being gay, I know that. But it just seems wrong to make Tolkien's wonderful world so...slashy. Sorry about my feelings, I'm a very extreme person. Ok, I accept the "character torture" fact and I was wrong about that – as well as the spelling mistake, the fact with the children (I changed it) and me being a hypocrite. Ok... now, what are the kinslayer wars? Everyone is talking about them, and I don't even know what they are! I did not read the Silmarillion, so please tell me! I want to know! Sorry about the retarded smart ass slash note. You are a very good reviewer and would make a very good beta reader if you didn't hate me so much.
Blue4dogs: I did not write a cannon fic, this is only my first story. An elven year is 144, human years, and it is written from an elven point of view, but anyway I changed it, so pls tell me if it's better or not! Yes, I agree with you on liking stories with good plots, though not slash ones. Thanks for the review, but what did you think of my story?
Anyway, thanks to you all to reviewing, even the ones who flamed, at least they gave me a lot of constructive criticism! Continue reviewing! Extreme apologies to those who hated my story.
"Come on, my little Legolas, this will make you big and strong like your father..." Thranduil's words were broken off with a gasp as, for the umpteenth time, his youngest son flung a spoonful of rice into his eyes. The children and wife of Thranduil roared with laughter. Take away the fact that Legolas was his youngest son, and you would have a powerful king humoring a child. Thranduil had been up since Legolas woke that morning along with the Sun, and had been feeding Legolas breakfast ever since...which was nearly two hour ago. His hair and splendid robes were streaked with bits of porridge. Legolas's tunic was speckled with yet more porridge, and had spent two whole hours shoving a porridge covered spoon away from his mouth. Thranduil was thoroughly determined to get Legolas to swallow some food. Legolas was just as determinedly keeping his little mouth pursed.
"Ai! You goblin! Covering your father with your unwanted food... you, little one, are Nirestel – Hopeless – with a spoon and your food... nevertheless, you will not go hungry, my little Greenleaf – "
"'Randuil! 'randuil! 'Restel!"
"See how my child learns! He has learned my name, as well as his..."
"Here, father, maybe I would have better luck...the winter has just begun, and I would not have my brother trapped in your halls in such good weather..." Caraniavas, the Crown Prince of Greenwood, took the spoon from his vehemently protesting father and proceeded to feed Legolas the porridge that was, by now, too cold to be fit for eating. Small wonder that Legolas immediately kicked his brother's hand and sent the bowl of porridge and the spoon flying.
"Caran! Restel! Restel!"
"Yes, yes. Now, Legolas, don't you want to eat this? We all know what happens when elflings eat their meals properly, don't we? They get to play in the snow with their big brothers!" Legolas's bright eyes widened as he looked at the new bowl of porridge in Caraniavas's hands, then at the forest outside his courts, which were covered by a blanket of snow.
A few seconds later, Caranavias was left alone with an empty bowl of porridge as the rest of his family dashed outside to chase after Legolas. After hearing those magical words uttered by his eldest brother, Legolas had gulped down all his porridge, freed himself from his father's hold, and was now on his way into the formidable winters of the Wood, clad in nothing but his thin tunic.
"Ai! Legolas! Legolas! Do you not hear me? Stay, Legolas!" but his son was deaf to his father's booming calls. The guards of the palace laughed to see their lord skidding about the ice in an unseemly manner, his robes ballooning out behind him. Thranduil, obviously forgetting that elves, especially Silvan elves, were not affected by the climate of their surroundings, chased his son to a clearing, where all the elflings of the forest were having a snowball fight.
"Now, just you – "Thranduil blinked and flinched. It so happened that just as Thranduil had stood directly in front of Legolas, a snowball, meant for the youngest prince, had been thrown. Thranduil wiped a fair part of a particularly large snowball form his nose.
"My lord! My apologies! I did not mean..." gasped the young culprit. Thranduil, however, was not concerned about himself. He opened his mouth to tell the elfling what he thought about people who aimed big and hard snowballs at a child who was no older that two years old.
"Master elfling, what do you mean by throwing snowffff-"Legolas snickered in delight as his snowball sailed straight into Thranduil's wide opened mouth, causing his lord to choke and cough. Of course, in all that commotion, both Legolas and his opponent had disappeared form their King's sight.
Legolas spent the whole day having the time of his life with his friends. Though they were all struggling with words and phrases, they managed to communicate and play without quarrelling or fighting.
It was a few months later, during spring. Thranduil and his eldest son were having a conversation regarding Legolas. "First you are unable to get Legolas to eat – next you are unable to stop your child from running into the snow – now you let Legolas disappear form right under your nose... father, your child care taking skills are badly rusted." Caraniavas, eldest prince of Greenwood, was
"Naturally. Itilrial and Laerial were before Legolas, and the ladies never gave me any trouble, unlike you lords..."
"Look! There runs the little pad foot! Quick, he looks badly in need of medical care! He looks as if he has been chased by a wolf of the North – " Caraniavas burst into peals of laughter as his protective father dashed out into the forest to see what ill had befallen his son.
Legolas, of course, was in no danger whatsoever. 'he looks like nobody's child,' Thranduil thought in amusement. In the morning, Legolas had been wearing a clean, light colored (albeit porridge flecked) tunic- whereas now, Legolas' tunic was a dark, sooty black color. His face and skin, once fair and bright, was now streaked with dirt and grime, and his golden hair would have to be washed thrice over to rid them of all their filth and snow. His nanny was chasing him around the courtyard with a hairbrush in her hands. Just when she was about to snag Legolas by the back of his ripped robes, he squirmed away from her long fingers and leapt onto the wall surrounding the courtyard. His nanny looked at her charge, then saw that her lord Thranduil was watching them intently with his turquoise eyes. Her eyes widened in surprise, then with worry, thinking that Thranduil would not like to see his child in such an untidy manner.
"My lord! My apologies... I shall get the child cleaned up immediately..." she stammered.
"You most certainly shall not! There will not be cleaning up of any sort!" stated Legolas, his voice holding a fair amount of authority. He had not noticed his father.
"That, I believe, is for me to decide," Thranduil boomed, in voice that would have intimidated all but his youngest. Legolas' golden head whipped around, and saw his father standing there, his face an expression of sternness.
"Father! I knew not that you were there!" He cried, leaping feline-like to Thranduil. The next moment, Thranduil was struggling with a bundle of clothes and limbs.
"Ai, my son, what will I do with you?" he asked in mock sadness, shaking his head despairingly as he took in the level of dirt and filth Legolas was encased in. "you were rolling on the ground again, were you not?" Legolas grinned and lifted his head, as if proud of his antics.
"Nothing!" he piped. With a witty smile, Thranduil bent close to Greenleaf and hissed.
"I think not, my son. Bathtime!" with that one word, Legolas was flung from a world of happiness to a world of horror and anger. His slender arms and legs started to flail out in all directions as his mouth opened into bellows and shrieks that were nearly on par with an army of singing dwarves. Thranduil, however, merely slung Legolas like a bag of potatoes over his shoulder by an ankle and walked into the bathing house, with Legolas' tiny fists hammering away at his father's back. But Legolas was not one to give up easily. Several kicks and a few loud groans later, Thranduil emerged from the bathroom empty handed, grimly messaging a bruised face. Legolas had evaded bathing – again.
No matter how hard Thranduil tried, he was the only person his family who couldn't get Legolas to take a shower. As Thranduil trudged down the corridors of his palace, he couldn't help wondering : what is the problem with me?
sorry for such a lame chapter. It was meant to be funny, but somehow I am just not a funny person. Please review! It only takes a few minutes of your time to make my day.
Starry: thanks for your offer! And I'm very glad you like my story! Question: do you know what are the elven kinslayer wars about? I think it's in the Silmarillion, but I did not read it. I just can't find the book... Also, do you want to be my beta reader?
Gollum-girl: Thank you!
Melissa(): Glad you like it! An elven pregnancy lasts for a mortal year, but an elven year lasts for 144 human years, so its perfectly fine for elves to get pregnant twice a year. Remember, this is written from an elven point of view.
Insane elven pirate: ok! I hope this is soon enough for you!
Mercury adept: OK... what mistakes? Your eyes must be really sharp... you can be my beta reader, if you want to!
Vicki Turner: Thank you very much! Is this fast enough for you? I'm really busy, this is the fastest I could update!
(Old) Sorry, I deleted the story to redo it, so now all your reviews are gone!
Stardreamer9: thank you for enjoying it. What do you mean by 'sweet'? oh, and an elven year is 144 human years, so it is possible for them to have three children in a year since this is written form an elven point of view. But anyway, I changed it to two children, I hope that's better, and I made them have fewer children - from nine to five. And, what are the kinslayer wars? I have only heard of them among the humans. Is it in the Silmarillion? I can't find that book, so please explain the wars to me so I can have a better understanding. Forgive me for my ignorance, but it is not my fault if I cannot find that book. And no, the ps note was not to draw flame attacks, but as you can see, I have changed it so it is not so outright. It was so outright because right before I posted this story, I read an incredibly brutal and disgusting story on lotr, and I felt extremely pressed to tell people to stop writing those kinds of stories. Apologies for the "guardian of Tolkien" thing. I did not mean for it to sound this way. You know, you are very just in your judgment – so – can you be my beta reader? I think I am in badly in need of someone to tone down my extreme feelings!
Neld: Erm...was that in the Silmarillion? Sorry, I did not read it. Errr... ok, so you were very right about that bit...
Das Blume: my name was nice? Thanks! Yes, I certainly agree with you about Elrond and Thranduil. Though Elrond's lineage is far greater. I also changed the children bit. Now they only have five children. And one elven year is 144 human years since this is written from the elven point of view. Erm... Celeborn? Yeah, he renamed Mirkwood with Thranduil after Sauron is defeated, so... and Galadriel as a possessive "wanna rule maiden"? I'll have to think about that.
Mistopurr: Really!? Thanks, I am already on a 'favourites' list, and this is only my first story! Yes! Don't worry about my feelings and the comments, but thanks for being so thoughtful! Yeah, you're right about the slash thing, you don't know how much criticism I received just for that! Sheesh...
Ash49: Thanks; glad you were at least interested in my story. Ok, I modified the ps note so that it was not so outright, and –my age will remain a secret – you're right on the 'barbaric thing, so I erased it. And you didn't change my views on slash, but at least I'm not so irked out by it now. Yes, and about Ian Mckellen being gay, I know that. But it just seems wrong to make Tolkien's wonderful world so...slashy. Sorry about my feelings, I'm a very extreme person. Ok, I accept the "character torture" fact and I was wrong about that – as well as the spelling mistake, the fact with the children (I changed it) and me being a hypocrite. Ok... now, what are the kinslayer wars? Everyone is talking about them, and I don't even know what they are! I did not read the Silmarillion, so please tell me! I want to know! Sorry about the retarded smart ass slash note. You are a very good reviewer and would make a very good beta reader if you didn't hate me so much.
Blue4dogs: I did not write a cannon fic, this is only my first story. An elven year is 144, human years, and it is written from an elven point of view, but anyway I changed it, so pls tell me if it's better or not! Yes, I agree with you on liking stories with good plots, though not slash ones. Thanks for the review, but what did you think of my story?
Anyway, thanks to you all to reviewing, even the ones who flamed, at least they gave me a lot of constructive criticism! Continue reviewing! Extreme apologies to those who hated my story.
"Come on, my little Legolas, this will make you big and strong like your father..." Thranduil's words were broken off with a gasp as, for the umpteenth time, his youngest son flung a spoonful of rice into his eyes. The children and wife of Thranduil roared with laughter. Take away the fact that Legolas was his youngest son, and you would have a powerful king humoring a child. Thranduil had been up since Legolas woke that morning along with the Sun, and had been feeding Legolas breakfast ever since...which was nearly two hour ago. His hair and splendid robes were streaked with bits of porridge. Legolas's tunic was speckled with yet more porridge, and had spent two whole hours shoving a porridge covered spoon away from his mouth. Thranduil was thoroughly determined to get Legolas to swallow some food. Legolas was just as determinedly keeping his little mouth pursed.
"Ai! You goblin! Covering your father with your unwanted food... you, little one, are Nirestel – Hopeless – with a spoon and your food... nevertheless, you will not go hungry, my little Greenleaf – "
"'Randuil! 'randuil! 'Restel!"
"See how my child learns! He has learned my name, as well as his..."
"Here, father, maybe I would have better luck...the winter has just begun, and I would not have my brother trapped in your halls in such good weather..." Caraniavas, the Crown Prince of Greenwood, took the spoon from his vehemently protesting father and proceeded to feed Legolas the porridge that was, by now, too cold to be fit for eating. Small wonder that Legolas immediately kicked his brother's hand and sent the bowl of porridge and the spoon flying.
"Caran! Restel! Restel!"
"Yes, yes. Now, Legolas, don't you want to eat this? We all know what happens when elflings eat their meals properly, don't we? They get to play in the snow with their big brothers!" Legolas's bright eyes widened as he looked at the new bowl of porridge in Caraniavas's hands, then at the forest outside his courts, which were covered by a blanket of snow.
A few seconds later, Caranavias was left alone with an empty bowl of porridge as the rest of his family dashed outside to chase after Legolas. After hearing those magical words uttered by his eldest brother, Legolas had gulped down all his porridge, freed himself from his father's hold, and was now on his way into the formidable winters of the Wood, clad in nothing but his thin tunic.
"Ai! Legolas! Legolas! Do you not hear me? Stay, Legolas!" but his son was deaf to his father's booming calls. The guards of the palace laughed to see their lord skidding about the ice in an unseemly manner, his robes ballooning out behind him. Thranduil, obviously forgetting that elves, especially Silvan elves, were not affected by the climate of their surroundings, chased his son to a clearing, where all the elflings of the forest were having a snowball fight.
"Now, just you – "Thranduil blinked and flinched. It so happened that just as Thranduil had stood directly in front of Legolas, a snowball, meant for the youngest prince, had been thrown. Thranduil wiped a fair part of a particularly large snowball form his nose.
"My lord! My apologies! I did not mean..." gasped the young culprit. Thranduil, however, was not concerned about himself. He opened his mouth to tell the elfling what he thought about people who aimed big and hard snowballs at a child who was no older that two years old.
"Master elfling, what do you mean by throwing snowffff-"Legolas snickered in delight as his snowball sailed straight into Thranduil's wide opened mouth, causing his lord to choke and cough. Of course, in all that commotion, both Legolas and his opponent had disappeared form their King's sight.
Legolas spent the whole day having the time of his life with his friends. Though they were all struggling with words and phrases, they managed to communicate and play without quarrelling or fighting.
It was a few months later, during spring. Thranduil and his eldest son were having a conversation regarding Legolas. "First you are unable to get Legolas to eat – next you are unable to stop your child from running into the snow – now you let Legolas disappear form right under your nose... father, your child care taking skills are badly rusted." Caraniavas, eldest prince of Greenwood, was
"Naturally. Itilrial and Laerial were before Legolas, and the ladies never gave me any trouble, unlike you lords..."
"Look! There runs the little pad foot! Quick, he looks badly in need of medical care! He looks as if he has been chased by a wolf of the North – " Caraniavas burst into peals of laughter as his protective father dashed out into the forest to see what ill had befallen his son.
Legolas, of course, was in no danger whatsoever. 'he looks like nobody's child,' Thranduil thought in amusement. In the morning, Legolas had been wearing a clean, light colored (albeit porridge flecked) tunic- whereas now, Legolas' tunic was a dark, sooty black color. His face and skin, once fair and bright, was now streaked with dirt and grime, and his golden hair would have to be washed thrice over to rid them of all their filth and snow. His nanny was chasing him around the courtyard with a hairbrush in her hands. Just when she was about to snag Legolas by the back of his ripped robes, he squirmed away from her long fingers and leapt onto the wall surrounding the courtyard. His nanny looked at her charge, then saw that her lord Thranduil was watching them intently with his turquoise eyes. Her eyes widened in surprise, then with worry, thinking that Thranduil would not like to see his child in such an untidy manner.
"My lord! My apologies... I shall get the child cleaned up immediately..." she stammered.
"You most certainly shall not! There will not be cleaning up of any sort!" stated Legolas, his voice holding a fair amount of authority. He had not noticed his father.
"That, I believe, is for me to decide," Thranduil boomed, in voice that would have intimidated all but his youngest. Legolas' golden head whipped around, and saw his father standing there, his face an expression of sternness.
"Father! I knew not that you were there!" He cried, leaping feline-like to Thranduil. The next moment, Thranduil was struggling with a bundle of clothes and limbs.
"Ai, my son, what will I do with you?" he asked in mock sadness, shaking his head despairingly as he took in the level of dirt and filth Legolas was encased in. "you were rolling on the ground again, were you not?" Legolas grinned and lifted his head, as if proud of his antics.
"Nothing!" he piped. With a witty smile, Thranduil bent close to Greenleaf and hissed.
"I think not, my son. Bathtime!" with that one word, Legolas was flung from a world of happiness to a world of horror and anger. His slender arms and legs started to flail out in all directions as his mouth opened into bellows and shrieks that were nearly on par with an army of singing dwarves. Thranduil, however, merely slung Legolas like a bag of potatoes over his shoulder by an ankle and walked into the bathing house, with Legolas' tiny fists hammering away at his father's back. But Legolas was not one to give up easily. Several kicks and a few loud groans later, Thranduil emerged from the bathroom empty handed, grimly messaging a bruised face. Legolas had evaded bathing – again.
No matter how hard Thranduil tried, he was the only person his family who couldn't get Legolas to take a shower. As Thranduil trudged down the corridors of his palace, he couldn't help wondering : what is the problem with me?
sorry for such a lame chapter. It was meant to be funny, but somehow I am just not a funny person. Please review! It only takes a few minutes of your time to make my day.