A/N: Hi, everyone! Sorry for the delay...
"What on earth are you doing?" Aragorn asks Eomer, who is breakdancing.
"I'm breakdancing, y'all!" Eomer says.
"You look like a chicken." Pip says.
"No, Pip, he looks chunky!" Merry says.
"I'm not chunky!" Eomer screams.
"Hey, what's going on?" Denethor asks.
"I'm breakdancing, y'all!" Eomer replies.
"You've said that already." Aragorn says.
"Look! Eomer's doing the worm!" Merry screams.
"It's the snake, not the worm!" Barret screams.
"WORM!"
"SNAKE!"
"You are the worst breakdancer I've ever heard of!" Norrington interjects.
"But you have heard of me!" Jack Sparrow, Captain Jack Sparrow, says.
"Jack! Long time, no see!" Pippin and Merry say.
"Ready?"
"YEAH!" The three go out to a local bar and drink.
En route to the bar...
"So, we're going to teach you a song, Jack." Merry says.
"Ok." Jack says.
"Repeat after me: Oh, you can search far and wide, you can drink the whole town dry
But you'll never find a beer so brown, you'll never a beer so brown
As the one we drink in our hometown, as the one we drink in our hometown!
You can keep your fancy ales, you can drink them by the flagon
But the only brew for the brave and true....
COMES FROM THE GREEN DRAGON!!" Pip sings.
"That's it?"
"That's it."
"Look! The BAR!" Merry says.
The three enter the bar and sit down.
"I'll have one ale."
"Make it two."
"Three, savvy?"
The barkeeper walks away and returns with 6 ales, taking everyone's orders as their own.
"We can have two now." Jack says.
"Or one now and save one for the road." Pip says.
"Something for the road..."
"The last of the longbottom leaf!"
"I know you've run out. You smoke too much, Pip."
"But, we'll see each other again soon...won't we?"
"I don't know...I don't know what's going to happen."
Jack is sitting there like, 'What??'.
"Wait. This conversation didn't happen yet."
"It just did, Pip."
"Well, it wasn't supposed to happen until the Return of the King! This is pre-War of the Ring."
"So what. Let's just drink the whole town dry."
"I thought we gave up drinking?"
"Wrong story."
"Sorry, Merry."
"Ok. Hey, waiter!"
Haldir runs over in a tux.
"Haldir?"
"Who are you, short stop?"
"What are you doing here?"
"Isn't this the Restaurant fic?"
"No."
"So sorry." And with that, Haldir runs out.
"We need...6 more ales."
"Make it 9."
"Better be 12."
And the waiter/barkeeper runs off, returning with 27 ales.
"Uh..."
"Well, we can each have..." Merry pauses. "9 now."
"Plus the additional 2 we were supposed to have."
"So 11."
"That's a lot of ale, savvy?"
"I know, Jack."
"Let's get drinking!"
And they proceed to drink the 11 ales each...
Meanwhile, back at the Palace...
"Will you stop breakdancing?" Boromir asks.
"I believe that junk food taste so good because it's bad for you..." Faramir sings.
"Ave Maria! Maiden mild...." Norrington sings.
"Why is Barret dancing on a stool?" Denethor asks.
"No idea, Denny."
"What did you call me?" Denethor asks.
"Denny."
"Ok, Boromiester."
"Only Breck can call me that."
"Who's Breck?"
"My crazy fan girl."
"..."
"She knows where I live."
"!!!"
"She's been hunting me down..."
"&%!"
Denethor walks off.
"Ave Maria!!!" Norrington sings, hitting a very high note and resulting in a Grade A embarrassing moment.
"Did your voice just crack?"
"Yes." Norrington says, blushing.
"YOU'RE ARAGORN-ADORER!!" Aragorn screams.
"Strider's Girl!" Strider's Girl yells.
"YEAH, NOT DENETHOR'S GIRL!!"
"Can you RELAX? It was one dance! I didn't even know you were going to be there!!!"
"OH, YEAH RIGHT!"
"You know what? This might be the END!"
"Of what?"
"Our RELATIONSHIP!"
"NO! It can't be!"
"It just may well be!"
"I'm sorry, Aragorn-Adorer/Strider's Girl."
"It's ok, Aragorn/Strider."
Strider's Girl and Aragorn walk off, happy together.
"What was that about?" Boromir asks
"I have no idea, Boromir."
"Ok."
Suddenly, Faramir stops what he was doing.
"BEHOLD!" he says.
"Is that..."
"A FIRE!!!" Denethor yells.
Denethor rushes by the fire and tries to push Faramir in.
"Get...in...there!!!"
"No!!"
"Go! I...hate...you!! Just...get...in!!"
"You don't mean that!!"
"Yes...I...do!"
"Father!"
"LET HIM GO!!!" A voice from on high yells and pushes Denethor into the flames.
"Who is that mysterious voice?"
Suddenly, a woman in black comes down.
"GOTH!! YOU'RE A GOTH!!" Barret screams.
"Oh, quiet!" The woman says.
She walks over to Faramir.
"Are you ok?"
"No../sniff/."
"Don't cry."
"My /sniff/ father /sniff/ hates /sniff/ me!" Faramir moans.
"Why don't you come with me?"
"Fine." Faramir sniffs.
Denethor hears all this. He has not caught fire at all. Amazing!
"YOU CANNOT TAKE MY SON FROM ME!!!"
"Fine. Party spoiler." The woman says, going back on high.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING???" Faramir yells.
"What do you mean?"
"She was my SALVATION!"
"Oh, cheese it! It's not called 'Boromir and Faramir's Crazy Singing Contest' for no reason!" Boromir says.
"Fine."
Faramir sits down by his fire. Denethor continually tries to push him in, but is stopped by a shower of rocks every time he tries.
"Where are Merry, Pip, and Jack?" Norrington asks.
In the Bar...
"I /hic/ feel /hic/ woozy."
"Me /hic/ too, /hic/ Merry!" Pip says.
"Drink up, me hearties, yo ho! /hic, hic, hic/" Jack says.
"Wha'?"
"Whazzat?"
"We're devils and black sheep and really bad eggs!" Jack says.
"Whazzat? Wha's he sayin?"
"No idea."
"We extort, we pilfer, we filch and sack."
"Wha?"
"DRINK UP, ME HEARTIES, YO HO!!" Jack says.
Norrington and company have been searching for the drunks.
"I will see to it that any man drunk enough to not know his name will get what he deserves- a short drop and a sudden stop." Norrington says.
"You've said that 200,890,999 times!" Sam complains.
Sam? When did Sam arrive? The authoress makes everyone forget that Sam appeared and leaves his words in. A modification was at hand.
"Did anyone hear something?" Aragorn asks.
"Nope."
"Ok. Thought I was going insane."
"This footprint looks veeeeery suspicious to me!" Denethor says.
Everyone groans. The last 2,099,345,333 footprints have looked veeeeery suspicious.
"Uh, Boromir made that footprint."
"Well, sor-ry, party spoiler!" Denethor yells.
Eight pages of mindless babble have ensued and no one has mentioned a thing about finding Merry, Pippin, or Jack! Stay tuned!
A/N: Wow, was that chapter long! I guess it was most of the pointless babble. So, there will be a part two! Wow, this chapter was really chaotic.
"What on earth are you doing?" Aragorn asks Eomer, who is breakdancing.
"I'm breakdancing, y'all!" Eomer says.
"You look like a chicken." Pip says.
"No, Pip, he looks chunky!" Merry says.
"I'm not chunky!" Eomer screams.
"Hey, what's going on?" Denethor asks.
"I'm breakdancing, y'all!" Eomer replies.
"You've said that already." Aragorn says.
"Look! Eomer's doing the worm!" Merry screams.
"It's the snake, not the worm!" Barret screams.
"WORM!"
"SNAKE!"
"You are the worst breakdancer I've ever heard of!" Norrington interjects.
"But you have heard of me!" Jack Sparrow, Captain Jack Sparrow, says.
"Jack! Long time, no see!" Pippin and Merry say.
"Ready?"
"YEAH!" The three go out to a local bar and drink.
En route to the bar...
"So, we're going to teach you a song, Jack." Merry says.
"Ok." Jack says.
"Repeat after me: Oh, you can search far and wide, you can drink the whole town dry
But you'll never find a beer so brown, you'll never a beer so brown
As the one we drink in our hometown, as the one we drink in our hometown!
You can keep your fancy ales, you can drink them by the flagon
But the only brew for the brave and true....
COMES FROM THE GREEN DRAGON!!" Pip sings.
"That's it?"
"That's it."
"Look! The BAR!" Merry says.
The three enter the bar and sit down.
"I'll have one ale."
"Make it two."
"Three, savvy?"
The barkeeper walks away and returns with 6 ales, taking everyone's orders as their own.
"We can have two now." Jack says.
"Or one now and save one for the road." Pip says.
"Something for the road..."
"The last of the longbottom leaf!"
"I know you've run out. You smoke too much, Pip."
"But, we'll see each other again soon...won't we?"
"I don't know...I don't know what's going to happen."
Jack is sitting there like, 'What??'.
"Wait. This conversation didn't happen yet."
"It just did, Pip."
"Well, it wasn't supposed to happen until the Return of the King! This is pre-War of the Ring."
"So what. Let's just drink the whole town dry."
"I thought we gave up drinking?"
"Wrong story."
"Sorry, Merry."
"Ok. Hey, waiter!"
Haldir runs over in a tux.
"Haldir?"
"Who are you, short stop?"
"What are you doing here?"
"Isn't this the Restaurant fic?"
"No."
"So sorry." And with that, Haldir runs out.
"We need...6 more ales."
"Make it 9."
"Better be 12."
And the waiter/barkeeper runs off, returning with 27 ales.
"Uh..."
"Well, we can each have..." Merry pauses. "9 now."
"Plus the additional 2 we were supposed to have."
"So 11."
"That's a lot of ale, savvy?"
"I know, Jack."
"Let's get drinking!"
And they proceed to drink the 11 ales each...
Meanwhile, back at the Palace...
"Will you stop breakdancing?" Boromir asks.
"I believe that junk food taste so good because it's bad for you..." Faramir sings.
"Ave Maria! Maiden mild...." Norrington sings.
"Why is Barret dancing on a stool?" Denethor asks.
"No idea, Denny."
"What did you call me?" Denethor asks.
"Denny."
"Ok, Boromiester."
"Only Breck can call me that."
"Who's Breck?"
"My crazy fan girl."
"..."
"She knows where I live."
"!!!"
"She's been hunting me down..."
"&%!"
Denethor walks off.
"Ave Maria!!!" Norrington sings, hitting a very high note and resulting in a Grade A embarrassing moment.
"Did your voice just crack?"
"Yes." Norrington says, blushing.
"YOU'RE ARAGORN-ADORER!!" Aragorn screams.
"Strider's Girl!" Strider's Girl yells.
"YEAH, NOT DENETHOR'S GIRL!!"
"Can you RELAX? It was one dance! I didn't even know you were going to be there!!!"
"OH, YEAH RIGHT!"
"You know what? This might be the END!"
"Of what?"
"Our RELATIONSHIP!"
"NO! It can't be!"
"It just may well be!"
"I'm sorry, Aragorn-Adorer/Strider's Girl."
"It's ok, Aragorn/Strider."
Strider's Girl and Aragorn walk off, happy together.
"What was that about?" Boromir asks
"I have no idea, Boromir."
"Ok."
Suddenly, Faramir stops what he was doing.
"BEHOLD!" he says.
"Is that..."
"A FIRE!!!" Denethor yells.
Denethor rushes by the fire and tries to push Faramir in.
"Get...in...there!!!"
"No!!"
"Go! I...hate...you!! Just...get...in!!"
"You don't mean that!!"
"Yes...I...do!"
"Father!"
"LET HIM GO!!!" A voice from on high yells and pushes Denethor into the flames.
"Who is that mysterious voice?"
Suddenly, a woman in black comes down.
"GOTH!! YOU'RE A GOTH!!" Barret screams.
"Oh, quiet!" The woman says.
She walks over to Faramir.
"Are you ok?"
"No../sniff/."
"Don't cry."
"My /sniff/ father /sniff/ hates /sniff/ me!" Faramir moans.
"Why don't you come with me?"
"Fine." Faramir sniffs.
Denethor hears all this. He has not caught fire at all. Amazing!
"YOU CANNOT TAKE MY SON FROM ME!!!"
"Fine. Party spoiler." The woman says, going back on high.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING???" Faramir yells.
"What do you mean?"
"She was my SALVATION!"
"Oh, cheese it! It's not called 'Boromir and Faramir's Crazy Singing Contest' for no reason!" Boromir says.
"Fine."
Faramir sits down by his fire. Denethor continually tries to push him in, but is stopped by a shower of rocks every time he tries.
"Where are Merry, Pip, and Jack?" Norrington asks.
In the Bar...
"I /hic/ feel /hic/ woozy."
"Me /hic/ too, /hic/ Merry!" Pip says.
"Drink up, me hearties, yo ho! /hic, hic, hic/" Jack says.
"Wha'?"
"Whazzat?"
"We're devils and black sheep and really bad eggs!" Jack says.
"Whazzat? Wha's he sayin?"
"No idea."
"We extort, we pilfer, we filch and sack."
"Wha?"
"DRINK UP, ME HEARTIES, YO HO!!" Jack says.
Norrington and company have been searching for the drunks.
"I will see to it that any man drunk enough to not know his name will get what he deserves- a short drop and a sudden stop." Norrington says.
"You've said that 200,890,999 times!" Sam complains.
Sam? When did Sam arrive? The authoress makes everyone forget that Sam appeared and leaves his words in. A modification was at hand.
"Did anyone hear something?" Aragorn asks.
"Nope."
"Ok. Thought I was going insane."
"This footprint looks veeeeery suspicious to me!" Denethor says.
Everyone groans. The last 2,099,345,333 footprints have looked veeeeery suspicious.
"Uh, Boromir made that footprint."
"Well, sor-ry, party spoiler!" Denethor yells.
Eight pages of mindless babble have ensued and no one has mentioned a thing about finding Merry, Pippin, or Jack! Stay tuned!
A/N: Wow, was that chapter long! I guess it was most of the pointless babble. So, there will be a part two! Wow, this chapter was really chaotic.