A/N: Sorry it's taken me so long to update. Been playing FFX-2 (42% completion so far). So, here it is, the moment you've been waiting for….
Chapter 16
"Tilling my own grave to keep me level
Jam another dragon down the hole
Digging to the rhythm and the echo of a solitary siren
One that pushes me along and leaves me so
Desperate and ravenous
Weak and powerless
Over you"
~ A Perfect Circle Weak and Powerless
There was no time to think, to step back and observe the situation. Dark eyes frantically searched the room for any kind of solution, heart and mind battling with each other over what was right, and what was sensible. The click echoed through her ears, just as her eyes landed on the handle at his side. Her mind surrendered its will to her heart.
His finger tightened on the trigger, pushing back until he could feel the slightest bit of resistance. The more sadistic part of him, buried deep in the darkest chamber of his soul, wished that he could see fear in his victim's eyes. It all moved painfully slow, like a lifetime passing in a split second. Something cold and round pressed into the skin at the base of his skull, causing every muscle in his body to tense in shock. He released his pressure on the trigger at the last possible moment.
"What are you doing?" his voice was quiet, a tone forced out that was somewhere in between anger and awe.
"You wouldn't listen to me," she choked out in reply. "I tried to tell you the truth, but you wouldn't listen. I had no choice."
"You have my attention now," he spoke, with an inflection of sarcasm.
"Put down the gun first."
"Rinoa-"
"Do it!" she ordered, her broken voice rising into a yell. "I'll shoot if I have to, I swear it!"
She watched carefully as he did what he was asked, before allowing a relieved sigh to escape her throat. She lowered her trembling arms until the gun was resting at her side. He turned to look at her, eyes desperately seeking the reason for such betrayal.
"I came with him of my own accord," she explained in a low mumble. "He used to be a patient of mine. I came with him, to help him prove his innocence."
"Rinoa, I know you're smarter than that!" he hissed. "He's guilty, there's nothing more to it."
"He says he's not guilty, and I believe him," she replied in an unwavering voice.
"You can't possibly be that foolish," Seifer insisted. "Even if you did come with him of your own will, and I don't shoot this pathetic bastard right here and now, I have to take him in. He's a criminal, no matter what you believe! I can't, and I won't, let him go."
"Neither will I." Her voice was steady, and cold, leaving no room for argument. "I don't want to do this to you, Seifer, but I will if I have to." Her grip tightened on the handle of the pistol she held, and her glassy eyes darted to the tall, dark-haired man that stood silent on the other side of the room.
There was no sudden revelation, no light going off in his head. It took him several moments of silence to piece it all together, bit-by-bit. The asylum was the last place she had been, before moving to the city, and now here she was, willing to throw away his life and hers for that of her patient's.
"I see," he whispered. "I kept trying to put it all together, but I never really understood it until now. Or maybe I just didn't want to understand." His eyes fell upon the ring he'd given her, watching it sparkle in the dim light. "I guess it's over, huh?"
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for things to happen this way, but I guess I just can't help the way I feel." Her voice was edged with tears, and a lump grew in her throat as she stared at the man before her. "I have no right to ask, but please… if you care anything about me…"
"I never once asked you, what it was that made you so sad when you came to the station. I never realized, until after you were gone, that I'd never really seen you smile. I want to be angry with you, I want to hate you. But how can I blame you for feeling the way you do, when I never paid enough attention to realize you were unhappy. I really did care about you, as best as I knew how. I hope you understand that."
She nodded. "I do. I care about you too, just not the way you want me to. At the time, I thought you were the best thing for me. I'm sorry…"
He nodded, his head bowed deep in thought. Silence invaded the room, and Rinoa weighed her options. Even if she had Seifer's forgiveness, he might not be willing to let Squall go.
"It wouldn't do any good to tell you I think he's a danger to you?"
Rinoa laughed slightly. "Not at all. I won't leave him."
"Then… where will you two be heading from here?" Seifer finally asked.
"I don't know. We haven't given it much thought," Rinoa answered softly.
"There's a small town south of Dollet called Winhill. Go there, and rest for one night if you need to, but no more. Fujin and Raijin are in town, covering the docks. I'll convince them to go north of Dollet, to Timber. From here on, you're on your own, though. If I continue to help you, I'll lose my job."
He said all of this without looking at her, in a low and pained voice. She studied him for a moment, trying to understand what was going through his head, before throwing his arms around him. "Thank you," she whispered. "I can't tell you how much this means to me."
He only nodded, and gently pushed her back. "You better get going. The longer I'm here, the more they'll start to wonder."
Rinoa nodded, and quietly slipped the ring off her finger, before leaving it in the palm of his hand. Squall, who had said nothing the entire time, was already gathering Rinoa's things into her suitcase. Rinoa grabbed the things around her purse and stuffed them inside, including a piece of notebook paper that she hadn't noticed there before.
Seifer turned to Squall, pinning him with a gaze bordering hatred. "You better take good care of her. If you cause her harm, in any way, I'll make your life nothing short of hell."
Squall gave a curt nod. "You won't have to worry."
Seifer turned and left, having nothing more to say, and didn't dare to so much as glance back at the woman he was leaving behind.
"Let's give him a few moments, then we'll sneak over to the dock, and leave."
Squall said nothing, but only stared at her. Though his face was expressionless, his eyes posed a silent question that she understood clearly. Why did she do it?
She smiled at him, in that comforting, reassuring way that made his chest tighten. She would explain everything later. He understood, without her saying a word.
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Getting to Winhill was easy enough. As promised, Seifer had called Fujin and Raijin away from the ferry, and as far as they could tell, they had not given chase. Winhill was a small, quiet town, seemingly untouched by the past century. Flowers lined the cobble stone paths, and elderly couples sipped tea on the porches of their quaint little cottages. There was only one inn, as there had been in FH, and this was probably the newest building in the town.
As Rinoa stood at the counter, debating over whether not to get one room or two, this time, something caught her eye. In the corner behind the front desk, a surveillance camera stared at her through a dark lens.
Of course… why hadn't she thought of it before?
"Miss, is there a problem?" the woman in front of her questioned as she followed Rinoa's gaze.
"Oh, of course not," Rinoa laughed nervously. "Its just that I haven't seen any kind of electronics since I've been here. It seems almost out of place."
The woman nodded. "Yes, well, this is the retirement capitol of the world, so it's mostly populated by old people. They don't trust machines. But, that doesn't mean all of us have to be that way. Now, have you decided what kind of room you'd like?"
"Do you have one room with two beds?"
"We have one left. Room B2."
"I'll take it," Rinoa sighed as she laid some money on the counter, and accepted a key in return.
She started silently up the stairs, and Squall followed behind her with her suitcase. As she opened the door to their room, he tossed her bag down and sighed. "I'm beginning to feel like your personal servant."
"Gee, someone's grumpy today," she commented.
"Well, having some psycho woman yell at you first thing in the morning, and then having someone put a gun to you head, kind of puts you in a bad mood!" he snapped.
"Psycho woman? What psycho woman?" she asked innocently. "Look, just relax for a while. I have to make another phone call."
Rinoa headed into the bathroom so she could have some privacy, and pulled her cell phone from her purse. As she did, a piece of paper fluttered to the ground, but she didn't notice.
The phone rang a few times before Isabella's weary voice came on the line. "Hello?"
"Isabella! I'm sorry to call you again so soon. How was your trip back?"
"Long and uncomfortable," Isabella answered immediately. "Did you get things sorted out?"
Rinoa laughed. "You wouldn't believe what happened after I got back. But I'll have to tell you some other time. Right now, I've got an important question to ask you."
"Shoot."
"Has there been any mention, whatsoever, about a surveillance camera tape? Concerning the murder, I mean. It just hit me today, I can't believe I didn't think of it before."
"No," Isabella replied. "They've gone on, and on about the knife, and the DNA match, and the recent 'kidnapping', but they haven't said anything about a tape."
"Something isn't right here," Rinoa muttered. "They kept those cameras on night and day, they would've captured the murder on tape. If that's the case, why aren't they submitting that as evidence?"
"Well, what if the tape does show Squall killing Quistis?"
Rinoa heaved a sigh. "Even if it does, they would have submitted it as evidence against him. Dammit… I need to see that tape, but if we get anywhere near Deling City…"
"Rinoa, don't worry about it," Isabella answered. "That tape's as good as yours. We'll get it for you."
"We?"
"Zell and I. He's still in the asylum, so he can work from the inside. We'll find the tape and get it to you."
"I can't ask you to do that. There's no telling what kind of trouble you'll get into."
"Don't worry about it. What else are friends for, anyway? Now, just chill for a day or so. When we have the tape, I'll call you and find out where you are. Okay?"
"Okay. Thank you so much, Isabella!"
"No problem."
Rinoa clicked off the phone, and let loose another shaky sigh, letting all the tension in her body slowly slip away. There was nothing to do now but wait. It sounded so simple, but with her and Squall at each other's throats, she knew there would be no such thing as relaxing anytime soon.
As she was about to exit the bathroom, the white, folded piece of paper on the floor caught her eye. She bent down and gingerly picked it up, unfolding it until the hand-written letter inside was revealed.
Rinoa,
I'm sorry. I know that doesn't mean much of anything to you anymore, and I don't blame you. But I just want you to know that I am. Honestly, I wasn't really thinking at all when I looked for you that night. It wasn't until I was on my way there that I made up the excuse that I needed your help. I guess you were right. I was being selfish for even asking you to come with me. I should never have even come back into your life. You have your own world now, and I had no right to intrude on that. I am selfish. I didn't think of anything but wanting to see you again.
I dragged you into this with me, without considering how it would affect you. I might cost you your job, and even your marriage. I could say I'm sorry a million times, but I guess that wouldn't fix anything. The best thing for me to do now is just go, and let you get back to your own life. I can only hope that you don't hate me for the rest of your life, for all the things I've said and done.
I know it's too late to take back the way I've hurt you, but I still want you to know the truth. I acted the way I did, because I didn't want you to know how I really felt. I let the opportunity to tell you slip away, and now you're engaged to another man. I couldn't face the rejection, so I lied. I hope you can forgive me someday.
I want you to go back to Deling City, live your own life, and be happy. I'm going to try and figure this all out on my own, so don't worry about me. Thank you for all you've done for me. Aside from Ellone, you're the only person that ever really tried. That means more to me than you'll ever know.
Squall
Rinoa placed a shaky hand over her mouth to muffle the sob that escaped her throat. If Seifer hadn't found him, then he'd have been gone by the time she returned. She would have lost him again, possibly forever. And it was all because she hadn't been able to see what was really there. She had never dared to believe that he could feel the same way about her as she did about him. It was all a terrible, tangled mess, and she had straighten it out before he slipped away from her again. Taking a deep breath, and wiping away her tears, she stepped out into their room again…
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
He lay across the bed in boredom, eyes focused on the door. It would be so easy just to walk out, at that very moment, and let Rinoa continue on with her life, but that selfish side of him he hated so much just wouldn't let him. The ring was gone from her finger, and she was a free woman. It was that fact that filled him with a single ray of hope, that maybe, just maybe… But no. How could he ever expect her to feel that way, after the way he'd treated her.
The sound of a door creaking open caught his attention, and he turned his head to study the intruder that had interrupted his thoughts. Rinoa stood there in the doorway of the bathroom, eyes rimmed with red as she clutched a folded piece of paper in her hand. Upon seeing what she held, his heart skipped a beat, and shot up from his comfortable spot on the bed.
"So… You were going to leave without saying goodbye, huh?" she asked quietly.
He opened his mouth to offer some explanation but drew a blank. "Yeah," he sighed after a moment. "That was the general idea."
Rinoa slowly crossed the room, and sat down on the bed next to him, staring into his eyes with unwavering determination. "You're not going anywhere. You're going to listen, and listen good, understand?"
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A/N: Well, sorry if this chapter didn't quite make your expectations. And every word planned perfectly, but it all came to me just as I was falling asleep, so I lost it. Sorry.
Next chapter: Use your imagination… All I'm saying is this one is not for little eyes…