THE AUTHORESS IS HAPPY
IT'S FRIDAY.
TOMORROW'S SATURDAY.
SHE'S HAPPY.
Reviews for Chapter Ten, Interrogation and Perversion
(She also apologizes for the last chapter's pervertedness...)

C.C.C.- That's scary... I never knew that. But it's okay, cuz I like people talking to me... I feel loved... Sort of... O.o In a I-don't-know-these-people-never-met-them-never-will-but-they-talk-to-me-anyway sort of way.
Phoenixblade-necklace- Good God, you write long reviews... Okay, let's see. I only have one Shonen Jump... I want to prescribe or whatever it's called to get it all year, but I can't guarantee I'd have the money, cuz I don't have a job and my mom won't pay for it... Your parents sound kinda psycho, no offense or anything... If I tried to get red contacts, my mother would be like, "You don't need those." and I wouldn't get them. I don't know where I'd get them, either... I'll get around to updating the others.... Sorry! Jeez. People are going to start killing me.
Mika Saito- Yeah, well, my mother probably already forgot that she wanted to read them, but should she ever decide she wants to, I'm dead.
Wild Roses- That's okay. All I know of my national anthem is "Oh say can you see." Then there's something about light. I have the music to play it on my flute, and I keep messing up on that, so the neighbors who can hear me probably think I'm unpatriotic... So I stopped playing it. Heh. And go ahead and laugh hysterically at my stories, because holding in laughter is bad. It's choked me before.
xkuroxshinobix- Yes, Your Royaltyness.
Draikitha- My mother wouldn't believe me if I said I was reading about math, cuz usually I kinda tell her what happens in the stories if I think it's really funny and not perverted... I tell her, and she looks at me and shakes her head and sighs... Like I'm insane or something. I never tell her about my stories, though. Just other peopleses.
Kaoru-the-kitsune- Is the DVD in English?! See, it turns out I started watching Wolf's Rain at episode six, not eight, so I was wrong, and all I need to see is the first five and I'll be good... There's five on a DVD? Usually there's three or four episodes...
Ophir- Well, people got off work on Monday, so they decided that since it was on a Sunday then we'd celebrate the FOURTH OF JULY on the FIFTH. How stupid is that?
phycotic person- Good lord! Psycho! Well, we're away from the bet now, so I can just... Ignore that psychotic thought that just came into my head...

CHAPTER ELEVEN
Going Home?

"Okay, this stuff is proven safe, all right? I drank it," Youko said, pouring each wolf a glass of the more appealing-looking new mixture, which was blue, which was a much more appealing color than puke.

"You drank it and you didn't throw up, and you feel fine, and--"

"Yes, Hige, I'm fine!" Youko said. "Now drink it."

"What's in this stuff?" Shadow asked, snatching the bottle swirling the remaining mixture around in it.

"Medicinal ingredients!" Youko snapped, snatching the bottle back and putting the cap on it.

"Can I have some?" Shadow asked.

"NO."

"Okay. I didn't really want any anyway, but I figured you'd let me drink some because it's poisonous or something." Shadow resumed her seat in front of the computer.

"Are you trying to screw with their minds?" Youko asked. "It's hard enough to get them to drink it because of the shit I made last time, but now you're just saying all kinds of stuff that'll make their imaginations work overtime!"

"Guys, I'm sure it's safe," Shadow said. "You can trust Youko. It's just me that can't trust him, because I don't trust anyone!"

"No. You don't. Now you guys, drink that," Youko said.

"Are you sure--" Hige said.

"Honestly..." Tsume muttered. He glanced at Kiba and to two downed their glasses in one swallow.

"Oh, it's so cute!" Shadow squealed suddenly.

"What?" Youko said. Hige and Toboe were more interested in whether Tsume and Kiba were still alive and breathing.

"They kissed..."

"Who?" Hige asked.

Shadow suddenly got shifty eyes, staring at the wolves out of the corner of her eyes. "Erm, nobody!" She closed the window, but not before Youko had read a few lines.

"You psychotic girl! You were reading slash again!"

"No I wasn't," Shadow said quickly, vacating the computer chair and inching out of the room.

"Who was it this time?" Eclipse asked, lying on the floor for no apparent reason whatsoever.

"Nobody," Shadow said quickly, already at the door.

"What's slash?" Toboe asked.

"You don't want to know, kid," Youko said.

"What, it's not that bad," Shadow said.

"You're a psycho," Youko accused.

"I know."

"Drink that," the fox commanded Hige and Toboe, totally changing the subject. "It's not going to kill you."

"It's not," Kiba said, supporting Youko. "I don't even feel any side effects."

"Really?"

"JUST DRINK IT!" Shadow snapped. The two hastily obeyed. "NOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?"

"Yeah," they answered.

"GOOD BOYS!"

"Um... Sure whatever."

Shadow went dancing out of the room.

Later that day, Koenma came to 'visit' again. He'd been in a very pissy mood every time he'd come to talk about the wolves. Maybe he was pissed about something. Ya think it might be possible? He'd gotten even more pissy after he'd found them all drunk... But... You could tell that... From how he screamed at them... And...

"So, are you all healthy again?" he asked, looking in particular at Tsume and Kiba, the only two wolves in the room (who, incidentally, had been playing a practice game of chess before he'd interrupted. Hiei was teaching them how to play).

"We've always been healthy," Kiba answered.

"Except for all those times we got injured, or when we were starving," Tsume said, both of them consciously avoiding the true point of Koenma's question.

"Yeah... Starving is bad. Luckily, though, we've managed rather well here with Shadow," Kiba said, taking Tsume's last pawn.

"Too bad we can't stay a bit longer," Tsume said. "But Koenma here is probably here to drag us back to our time. Check."

"What?" Kiba said.

"Check."

"That's not check!"

"Yes it is! It's check!"

"Is that check, Hiei?"

"Umm... Yes."

"Damn," Kiba muttered. "Well what do I do now?"

"You move so you're not in check anymore," the demon answered simply.

"Ah."

Koenma walked out of the room, then re-entered.

"So, are you all healthy again?" he asked, pretending they hadn't ignored him.

"I thought we answered that," Tsume said.

"Check," Kiba said dryly. Tsume grunted.

"I think that's check mate."

"Is it?"

"I don't think I have any moves."

"You don't? So I won?"

"Apparently," Tsume muttered, absently spinning one of the white pawns he'd taken from Kiba earlier in the game.

"Way to go, Kiba," Hiei said.

"WOOHOO! KIBA WON!" came Shadow's loud and annoying voice.

Everybody jumped and looked around for Shadow. She came squeezing out from under the couch (which is about a space of four inches) and pounced on Tsume.

"Hello, Loser!"

"Please don't refer to me as that," Tsume said. "It's degrading."

"Rightio, Sweetie!"

Tsume groaned and relaxed, staring up at the ceiling. "Don't call me that, either. I have a name, you know."

"I know. You're The Mighty Grey Wolf, Tsume With The Gold Eyes."

"Just Tsume will do, Shadow. I don't think the rest of that was part of my name up until just now when you made it up," Tsume said. "Get off me."

"Huh-uh."

"Damn you."

"Go ahead."

"I just did, didn't I?"

Shadow was straddling Tsume's waist, her hands on his shoulders, and Koenma was standing about six feet away, staring at her, already pissy from the two wolves ignoring him.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SHADOW?!" he screamed.

"Talking to Tsume..." Shadow said innocently, looking at him over her shoulder, oblivious to his pissiness.

"TALKING TO HIM WHILE STRADDLING HIM!"

"Errmmm... Is there something wrong with that?" Shadow asked cluelessly.

"GET OFF! THEY'RE GOING BACK TO THEIR OWN TIME!"

"Umm... Have we done something to offend you?" Kiba asked.

"Or are you always a pissy little boy with a pacifier?" Tsume added.

Koenma had steam rising off him. "Grrrrrrrr..."

"Maybe he's allergic to wolves," Shadow said.

"Allergic to wolves?!" Koenma snapped. "I'm not allergic to anything! I'm KOENMA!"

"... So? I'm Shadow, and I'm allergic to door-to-door salesmen."

"What's that got to do with anything?" Hiei asked.

"Well, he thinks he shouldn't be allergic to wolves just because he's Koenma. I say, fooey on him, I'm Shadow, and I'm allergic to door-to-door salesmen, so just because you're great doesn't mean you haven't got flaws," Shadow explained.

"You're great?" Tsume asked incredulously.

"Yes I am. I make everything better just by being there."

"Ahm... Okay."

Koenma sniffled.

"Koenma's allergic to wolves," Shadow sang, dancing away. "Koenma's allergic to wooooooollllllves!"

"I am not!"

"I bet," Shadow said, getting up in his face. She whistled. "Tsume, come here! As a wolf."

"I'm not allergic to wolves!"

"Why wouldn't you be? They're just the ancestors of all canine life on earth," Hiei said, shrugging.

"What do you know?" Koenma snapped. Tsume jumped up on the couch and put his feet on the back, getting up to Koenma's face level where he stood behind the couch.

"Are you allergic?" Shadow asked. Koenma looked at Tsume.

"No," he said firmly.

"Glad to know it," Shadow said cheerfully. "Okay then, are you going to tell me why you're here?" She started scratching the big grey wolf behind his ears.

"I'm here because-- Would you stop that!?" Koenma snapped, hitting Shadow's wolf-petting hand.

"Jealous?" she asked. "Do you want me to pet you on the head?"

"No! It's just disturbing me."

"He's jealous," Shadow said to Tsume. He barked. "Can you tell Tsume prefers to drop his human disguise whenever he can?"

"Yes, whatever... But I feel stupid talking to a big dog."

"That's not very nice, Koenma," Shadow said, looking insulted.

"I don't care."

"Tsume, look human so Koenma doesn't feel stupid..." Kiba said, chuckling.

"Though he should feel stupid all the time, walking around with a pacifier hanging out of his mouth," Tsume muttered, crossing his arms and looking pouty. Koenma glared.

"Go get those other two. You're going back to your own time. I'm sick of all these disturbances. I'm going to find a way to seal it so nobody else can come into this time," Koenma said coldly.

"Pissy little crybaby," Shadow mumbled.

"Watch it girl, or I'll send you back to their time with them!"

"Okay!" Shadow said cheerfully. Koenma groaned.

"Come on. We're going to Reikai."

"HIGE! TOBOE!" Shadow hollered. "GET DOWN HERE!"

The two brown wolves came in a minute later.

"Do you feel like you have to come with us, Shadow?" Koenma asked.

"Yes I do. Because I don't trust you."

"What the hell!"

"You should know we always come along, Koenma. Kurama and Eclipse went home for once in their lives, so they aren't even here, and Yusuke and Kuwabara... Yusuke went home and Kuwabara accidentally fell into that manhole in the street, so he's in the sewer," Hiei said, putting emphasis on 'accidentally' and 'fell.'

A short time later, the six were standing in one of Reikai's many rooms. There was a portal in front of them that looked like black water. Shadow stared at it, smiling stupidly.

"It's shiny..." she said, reaching towards it. Koenma slapped her hand.

"I'm not sure exactly where this comes out, but it will be in your own time."

"You don't know where it comes out!?" Tsume said in disbelief. "You could be transporting us to our doom!"

"DOOM!!!" Shadow squealed, running in circles until Hiei punched her in the head.

"He's right, though! You could be sending us right into that wolf hunter's home, or into a base for the army or something!" Hige said.

"Doom?" Shadow said. Hiei hit her again.

"Yes, Shadow, we would be doomed. Now shut up," Kiba said.

"Yessir." Shadow put her hand over her own mouth.

"You should end up near where you were when you got sent to this time. Now get going!" Koenma snapped.

"Since when did you not care about other peoples' well-being?" Hiei asked.

"Fine. We'll go," Tsume said. "Forget it. Bye."

Shadow lunged at him and hugged him. "Bye!!! I'll miss you, for about five minutes until I forget!"

Tsume rolled his eyes and pried her off, stepping towards the portal with Kiba next to him. They stepped into the portal.

"Well... Your turn," Hiei said, looking at Toboe and Hige. They hadn't even moved when the portal spewed out Tsume and sent him rolling across the floor, Kiba close behind.

"What the heck!" Koenma exclaimed.

"What are we doing back here?" Tsume asked, climbing to his feet.

"That's what I wanna know!" Koenma snapped.

"We didn't do it!" Kiba said. "We just stepped in, and a second later we were sent back out into this room and went tumbling across the floor."

"Well what the heck is the deal with that?" Hiei asked.

"Try again," Koenma ordered.

They did, and once again, both were spewed out and sent tumbling across the floor.

"Well shit," Koenma muttered. "Go away. I'll figure this out."

And the group was suddenly back in Shadow's yard.

"YAY!" Shadow squealed, prying her own hand off her mouth. She lunged at Tsume and hugged him. "You get to stay even longer!"

"Yay," Tsume said dryly.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

I know it was short, but I just wanted to get something up so people forgot about the last chapter and it's scary pervertedness. Oh, my new obsession is the noises Zoidburg makes. I walk around making those noises all the time... My mother yells at me.