SPIDER-MAN: 25486
BY YODAMAN
Peter Parker, more commonly known as Spider-Man, has not seen good times lately. After several well-fought battles Sergei Kravinoff, a.k.a Kraven, has defeated him. Kraven, trying to prove himself better than Spider-Man, donned Peter's black costume and captured Edward Whelan, a.k.a. Vermin, a villain that Spider-Man could not do without Steve Rogers and his alter ego, Captain America. Peter, furious with what Sergei had done, returned from the grave and attacked Kraven, who did not fight back for he had victory. Kraven eventually release Vermin on the streets, which led to another Spider-Man adventure. The deranged Kraven, convinced he had his victory, took his own life.
This did not sit well with Dmitri Smerdyakov (the master of disguise called the Chameleon), Kraven's childhood friend. After help from Harry Osborne (the current Green Goblin), Dmitri used androids to pose as Peter's parents. Once he found out they were robots, he went berserk and sought to destroy the chameleon. In their final confrontation, Dmitri remembered what really happened in Kraven's home- he was Sergei's manservant and was beaten on a regular basis. Upset with what happened, Dmitri went berserk and was sent to the looney bin. All he does is repeat to him 'I am nothing...'
Meanwhile, Spider-Man had a recent run in with the reptile scientist Curt Connors, a.k.a. the Lizard, and was able to cure Curt and make him human for a temporary time. After the run-in, the police found out and arrested him. His fate lies in the hands of a county councilor, who would love to see the reptile's head hanging on her wall...
ISSUE I
I AM NOTHING
"I am nothing...."cried the man known as Dmitri Smerdyakov. "That's what I am. Nothing. Nothing but Russian trash. I trusted him. We were like brothers! When he died I did everything I could to avenge him! And what does he do to me? Beat me up like an old dishrag! I'm nothing! Nothing! NOTHING!"
"....and that's what he's been doing for the past six months", said Herman Birmingham, a guard of the largest jail in New York. That's how long it had been since he arrived in their station. Six months. Six months since the amazing Spider-Man had brought the elusive Russian criminal to justice. To Herman, this didn't seem like justice. It was torture. Not to Dmitri, but to him and all the other officers and inmates. His wailing the same old lines for half a year now, and it did worse to your brain than drinking all 99 bottles of beer on the wall. Often it was a burden to have to be anywhere near Dmitri, and Herman always got the job on a Monday. Today, however, was a Thursday, and he had the honor of showing Inspector John Jacobs around the department. Jacobs had the high-paying job of visiting all the police departments on the Eastern seaboard, evaluating what he thought about all the police departments he had visited and would send it to the government. The jail was a generally clean establishment, but the Smerdyakov case made it look like a pig rolling around in mud.
"How has he been with other inmates?" asked Jacobs while sketching something down on a notepad.
"Well", said Herman, "that is a problem."
"What kind of a problem?" asked Jacobs.
"He nearly killed his bunkmate", said Herman. "His bunkmate was harassing him about his mental state and Dmitri pounced on the man like a lion. If it wasn't for a friend of mine, that bunkmate would've died, but I would've been glad if he did."
"What did you do about it?"
"We put him in this cell right here, away from all the other inmates. He hasn't had a violet outburst since then, but he does mutter to himself."
"Why does he do that?"
"Something traumatic happened to him in his childhood?"
"Like what?"
"You've gotta as Spider-Man about that! He's the one who brought him in."
"I see".
"My guess is that he was molested as a child. That would get him to do something like that..." Suddenly, there was a loud rattling noise beside the two, who leaped at the loud sound. They found Dmitri, who was shaking the bars of his cell and screaming at the two.
"You know nothing!" exclaimed Dmitri. "You know nothing of my past! Leave! Go play in your little industrialized civilization! Let the demons eat you! They will consume every ounce of flesh that is hugging onto your bodies! The Apocalypse shall come! It shall be your fault! LEAVE AND GO DIE!"
"I told you he's insane", said Herman.
"I've taken enough notes on this Dmitri...."exclaimed John.
"We call him 'the Chameleon'", said Herman. "That's what he was called in his brighter days. His days of crime. It's the least we can do to heal his pain".
"And I thought New York had enough Lizards. Okay, now take me to Zechariahs Black...."
"You mean the Grim Raper? You do not want to see him when he's happy..." The two walked away from the cell to see another infamous inmate, but Herman knew in his heart that nothing would ever stop that screaming
"I am nothing!" exclaimed Dmitri. "But it is they who disturb the peace! They mock me, make me look like a damaged machine that need repairing. They dare say things like that! But I am nothing. Doesn't that make what they say true? It is not! That is not what happened! They know nothing! Why are they so cruel? Why can't they let me die? That's all I want! To die! To end this misery! Please, God! End this pain! PLEASE!"
"Quit all that whining!" said an unknown voice in his cell. "You sound like a young child, crying to mommy when you fell on the ground and got a boo-boo".
"Show yourself!" exclaimed Dmitri. "Where are you? Why do you torment me so? QUIT MESSING WITH MY MIND!"
"And that was supposed to be what you were so good at", said the voice. Suddenly, Dmitri was inside a large sewer instead of his cell, and standing in front of him was some strange man with green skin, wearing a purple shirt with purple gloves, purple boots, and even a purple hat.
"Who are you?" asked Dmitri. "Why are you here! Where am I? What is this place? Get me back to where I was dammit!"
"Quit saying your thoughts out loud!", exclaimed the green man. "It gets annoying!"
"I can't help it," exclaimed Dmitri. "Tell me who you are!"
"Remember me?" said the green man. "Suddenly, he grabbed his face and pulled on it, showing his real face underneath. "I'm Harry Osborne, but you might just call me the Green Goblin. I'm the one who helped you with the androids, remember?"
"Yes...." sighed Dmitri. Suddenly, his mind began to clear. He could think! And he could remember the past! He hadn't felt like this before. It was almost a revelation. "I remember. You built androids of the parents of Peter Parker so I could lure him into my trap. But it didn't work. It's your entire fault! You're the one who messed up! If you could've just done one hell of a lot better job, it would've worked and I wouldn't be here!"
"Calm down, now", shouted Harry. "It'll do you no good. Now, I did the best job I could, and if that's not dandy enough for you, then I can just send you back to that cage and you can wallow in your misery for the rest of your life."
"But you're dead!" exclaimed Dmitri. "You died back in 1993! It's been years since then!"
"Yes", hissed Harry. "But there's no stopping me then, is there? I came back to help you. I realized I played a part in your pain, and I couldn't stand to see you suffer like this for much longer."
"Why do you contaminate yourself for being with me?" asked Dmitri. "I am nothing! I am filth! Leave before it's too late!"
"Open your mind before it's too late!" yelled Harry. "Don't you talk to yourself like that! You aren't nothing. You have a gift. A gift to be anyone you want to be. You used to use that gift to your advantage. That's exactly what you can do now! How, do you ask? Who is the one who brought you this pain? Who is the one who made you relive your childhood memories?"
"Sp...Spider-Man?" pinched Dmitri.
"Bingo!" exclaimed Harry while slapping his hand on Dmitri's shoulder. "You got it! Spider-Man did all this. Without Spider-Man you wouldn't know those memories! You'd be happy, and you'd be as far away from this prison as you desire. What does someone like that deserve?"
"Death!" exclaimed Dmitri. This talk was really stimulating his mind. He hadn't felt like that in ages! He would finally feel some joy- by killing Spider-Man! "But how?"
"Excuse me?"
"How will I kill Spider-Man? Every other guise I've used hasn't worked!"
"You are great with playing with minds? Use some brainpower! What does Spider-Man love?"
"His silly costume?"
"Hs wife you dumb nut! He loves his wife! What would he do if you took his wife?"
"He'd want her back".
"Exactly! But what will he do to get her back?"
"He'd fight me to get her."
"Yes! But you don't have to do the fighting! You could have someone else. Someone like...HIM!" Suddenly, Dmitri whipped his head around and saw a large, reptilian shape running in the sewer water, running as if he were being chased by a pack of wolves. Suddenly, Dmitri had an idea. He laughed. He laughed since he hadn't had an idea in so long. He laughed at the fact that Spider-Man would die. Harry was gone, however, and he was back in his cell, but he still laughed. Blood would shed soon. Very soon.
BY YODAMAN
Peter Parker, more commonly known as Spider-Man, has not seen good times lately. After several well-fought battles Sergei Kravinoff, a.k.a Kraven, has defeated him. Kraven, trying to prove himself better than Spider-Man, donned Peter's black costume and captured Edward Whelan, a.k.a. Vermin, a villain that Spider-Man could not do without Steve Rogers and his alter ego, Captain America. Peter, furious with what Sergei had done, returned from the grave and attacked Kraven, who did not fight back for he had victory. Kraven eventually release Vermin on the streets, which led to another Spider-Man adventure. The deranged Kraven, convinced he had his victory, took his own life.
This did not sit well with Dmitri Smerdyakov (the master of disguise called the Chameleon), Kraven's childhood friend. After help from Harry Osborne (the current Green Goblin), Dmitri used androids to pose as Peter's parents. Once he found out they were robots, he went berserk and sought to destroy the chameleon. In their final confrontation, Dmitri remembered what really happened in Kraven's home- he was Sergei's manservant and was beaten on a regular basis. Upset with what happened, Dmitri went berserk and was sent to the looney bin. All he does is repeat to him 'I am nothing...'
Meanwhile, Spider-Man had a recent run in with the reptile scientist Curt Connors, a.k.a. the Lizard, and was able to cure Curt and make him human for a temporary time. After the run-in, the police found out and arrested him. His fate lies in the hands of a county councilor, who would love to see the reptile's head hanging on her wall...
ISSUE I
I AM NOTHING
"I am nothing...."cried the man known as Dmitri Smerdyakov. "That's what I am. Nothing. Nothing but Russian trash. I trusted him. We were like brothers! When he died I did everything I could to avenge him! And what does he do to me? Beat me up like an old dishrag! I'm nothing! Nothing! NOTHING!"
"....and that's what he's been doing for the past six months", said Herman Birmingham, a guard of the largest jail in New York. That's how long it had been since he arrived in their station. Six months. Six months since the amazing Spider-Man had brought the elusive Russian criminal to justice. To Herman, this didn't seem like justice. It was torture. Not to Dmitri, but to him and all the other officers and inmates. His wailing the same old lines for half a year now, and it did worse to your brain than drinking all 99 bottles of beer on the wall. Often it was a burden to have to be anywhere near Dmitri, and Herman always got the job on a Monday. Today, however, was a Thursday, and he had the honor of showing Inspector John Jacobs around the department. Jacobs had the high-paying job of visiting all the police departments on the Eastern seaboard, evaluating what he thought about all the police departments he had visited and would send it to the government. The jail was a generally clean establishment, but the Smerdyakov case made it look like a pig rolling around in mud.
"How has he been with other inmates?" asked Jacobs while sketching something down on a notepad.
"Well", said Herman, "that is a problem."
"What kind of a problem?" asked Jacobs.
"He nearly killed his bunkmate", said Herman. "His bunkmate was harassing him about his mental state and Dmitri pounced on the man like a lion. If it wasn't for a friend of mine, that bunkmate would've died, but I would've been glad if he did."
"What did you do about it?"
"We put him in this cell right here, away from all the other inmates. He hasn't had a violet outburst since then, but he does mutter to himself."
"Why does he do that?"
"Something traumatic happened to him in his childhood?"
"Like what?"
"You've gotta as Spider-Man about that! He's the one who brought him in."
"I see".
"My guess is that he was molested as a child. That would get him to do something like that..." Suddenly, there was a loud rattling noise beside the two, who leaped at the loud sound. They found Dmitri, who was shaking the bars of his cell and screaming at the two.
"You know nothing!" exclaimed Dmitri. "You know nothing of my past! Leave! Go play in your little industrialized civilization! Let the demons eat you! They will consume every ounce of flesh that is hugging onto your bodies! The Apocalypse shall come! It shall be your fault! LEAVE AND GO DIE!"
"I told you he's insane", said Herman.
"I've taken enough notes on this Dmitri...."exclaimed John.
"We call him 'the Chameleon'", said Herman. "That's what he was called in his brighter days. His days of crime. It's the least we can do to heal his pain".
"And I thought New York had enough Lizards. Okay, now take me to Zechariahs Black...."
"You mean the Grim Raper? You do not want to see him when he's happy..." The two walked away from the cell to see another infamous inmate, but Herman knew in his heart that nothing would ever stop that screaming
"I am nothing!" exclaimed Dmitri. "But it is they who disturb the peace! They mock me, make me look like a damaged machine that need repairing. They dare say things like that! But I am nothing. Doesn't that make what they say true? It is not! That is not what happened! They know nothing! Why are they so cruel? Why can't they let me die? That's all I want! To die! To end this misery! Please, God! End this pain! PLEASE!"
"Quit all that whining!" said an unknown voice in his cell. "You sound like a young child, crying to mommy when you fell on the ground and got a boo-boo".
"Show yourself!" exclaimed Dmitri. "Where are you? Why do you torment me so? QUIT MESSING WITH MY MIND!"
"And that was supposed to be what you were so good at", said the voice. Suddenly, Dmitri was inside a large sewer instead of his cell, and standing in front of him was some strange man with green skin, wearing a purple shirt with purple gloves, purple boots, and even a purple hat.
"Who are you?" asked Dmitri. "Why are you here! Where am I? What is this place? Get me back to where I was dammit!"
"Quit saying your thoughts out loud!", exclaimed the green man. "It gets annoying!"
"I can't help it," exclaimed Dmitri. "Tell me who you are!"
"Remember me?" said the green man. "Suddenly, he grabbed his face and pulled on it, showing his real face underneath. "I'm Harry Osborne, but you might just call me the Green Goblin. I'm the one who helped you with the androids, remember?"
"Yes...." sighed Dmitri. Suddenly, his mind began to clear. He could think! And he could remember the past! He hadn't felt like this before. It was almost a revelation. "I remember. You built androids of the parents of Peter Parker so I could lure him into my trap. But it didn't work. It's your entire fault! You're the one who messed up! If you could've just done one hell of a lot better job, it would've worked and I wouldn't be here!"
"Calm down, now", shouted Harry. "It'll do you no good. Now, I did the best job I could, and if that's not dandy enough for you, then I can just send you back to that cage and you can wallow in your misery for the rest of your life."
"But you're dead!" exclaimed Dmitri. "You died back in 1993! It's been years since then!"
"Yes", hissed Harry. "But there's no stopping me then, is there? I came back to help you. I realized I played a part in your pain, and I couldn't stand to see you suffer like this for much longer."
"Why do you contaminate yourself for being with me?" asked Dmitri. "I am nothing! I am filth! Leave before it's too late!"
"Open your mind before it's too late!" yelled Harry. "Don't you talk to yourself like that! You aren't nothing. You have a gift. A gift to be anyone you want to be. You used to use that gift to your advantage. That's exactly what you can do now! How, do you ask? Who is the one who brought you this pain? Who is the one who made you relive your childhood memories?"
"Sp...Spider-Man?" pinched Dmitri.
"Bingo!" exclaimed Harry while slapping his hand on Dmitri's shoulder. "You got it! Spider-Man did all this. Without Spider-Man you wouldn't know those memories! You'd be happy, and you'd be as far away from this prison as you desire. What does someone like that deserve?"
"Death!" exclaimed Dmitri. This talk was really stimulating his mind. He hadn't felt like that in ages! He would finally feel some joy- by killing Spider-Man! "But how?"
"Excuse me?"
"How will I kill Spider-Man? Every other guise I've used hasn't worked!"
"You are great with playing with minds? Use some brainpower! What does Spider-Man love?"
"His silly costume?"
"Hs wife you dumb nut! He loves his wife! What would he do if you took his wife?"
"He'd want her back".
"Exactly! But what will he do to get her back?"
"He'd fight me to get her."
"Yes! But you don't have to do the fighting! You could have someone else. Someone like...HIM!" Suddenly, Dmitri whipped his head around and saw a large, reptilian shape running in the sewer water, running as if he were being chased by a pack of wolves. Suddenly, Dmitri had an idea. He laughed. He laughed since he hadn't had an idea in so long. He laughed at the fact that Spider-Man would die. Harry was gone, however, and he was back in his cell, but he still laughed. Blood would shed soon. Very soon.