Author's note: Thank you all very much for your reviews. It is fantastic to get so many, and to know that you engage with the story!

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Chapter 21 – To Make a Choice

Two months later.

Estel, now called Aragorn, woke up feeling miserable. He knew the signs. Not another cold! Since he had joined the rangers, Estel had been plagued constantly by minor illnesses. It felt to him as if his nose had hardly stopped running in the last eight months. He knew enough about human illnesses to know that most were passed on from one person to the other and that most humans developed resistance to the more common forms since childhood. He had never been exposed to anyone ill since the Eldar do not suffer from illness, and therefore only had once had a cold, after a visit to Bree.

It now appeared to him as if his body had decided to make up for lost opportunities to rebel. Currently, his head ached and the sides of his face were sore, and he felt slightly feverish, a sensation that he had come to know far too well. Halbarad had warned him that he was likely to suffer more from relatively minor illnesses since he had no childhood resistance against any common human illnesses.

Estel was out with Halbarad on a scouting mission in the area north of the Shire. The young man had never been to the halflings' land and was curious to see it, so Halbarad had taken him along s a companion. There had been news of orcs, and they wanted to check these out.

With a groan, he pushed himself up onto his elbows. He and Halbarad had followed the ways of the elves and had built a small flet in the branches of tree so that both of them could sleep in relative safety from unpleasant surprises. The older ranger was already up, kneeling over his pack and trying to retrieve some food for breakfast. With considerable effort, Estel got himself up and ready for the day. He refused breakfast, which earned him a concerned look from Halbarad. The younger ranger admitted that he was getting another cold. Halbarad was not surprised, this had to be expected.

They pressed on. The two rangers had planned to cover quite a large area this day, and they more or less followed this plan. Throughout the day, Estel felt progressively worse. He noticed that the glands on the sides of his face were now severely swollen, and very painful.

When they stopped for their evening meal, Halbarad took a good look at his younger companion. He sighed, he had seen this before. Nothing uncommon, but a nuisance in the wild.

"Estel, how do you feel?" Halbarad still called the young man Estel, he used 'Aragorn' in front of others, but not when it was just the two of them.

The younger ranger was in too much discomfort to be dishonest. "Terrible... But I am sure I won't die from it."

"I think it is a common childhood illness that you have contracted. Most humans get it as young children and they then do not get it again. In children it only comes with a slight fever and the swelling of the glands on the side of the face. Uncomfortable but harmless."

"We will have to find shelter and stop for a few days. This illness will need to run its course. It will take about a week before you will be more or less recovered. We will have to find shelter and stop for a few days. Stay here, I will see whether I can find us a place where we can stay for a few days."

"A week? That long?" Estel looked horrified. But Halbarad only confirmed the statement and said that it was important that he regained his strength before they carried on.

Halbarad made a quick survey of the surrounding area. He found a small secluded glen not far away, with a rock wall closing it in one side. There was no natural cover, but the two rangers quickly constructed a makeshift shelter out of branches and pine bows leaning against the rock wall. It would serve as some protection from the weather and provide warmth. It was again autumn and the nights were cool, but the weather had not yet truly turned.

Halbarad told Estel to rest as much as possible. The younger ranger did not hesitate to comply, in itself a good indication just how poorly he was feeling. The next two days they spent quietly, with Estel either resting or doing some carving. He was working on a small wooden box that he was adorning with an intricate pattern of inlays. He told Halbarad it would be a present for Legolas.

On the third day, they fell into the same pattern, but Halbarad noticed that Estel did not look better, but more feverish and moved very stiffly.

"Estel, I can see you are not comfortable. Are you tender … here?" The older ranger discretely put his hand over the front of his breeches.

"Yes," Estel whispered almost inaudibly, looking down, extremely embarrassed." How did you know?"

"I told you that this illness is a harmless illness that most children get without any lasting effects. It is not quite so harmless when a man or boy contracts this once he is physically mature. There can be pain in this area, and if that happens there is a good chance of the man not being able to father children."

"Why did you not tell me earlier?"

"Not everyone gets these symptoms, and I did not want to worry you. There is not much we can do for you here bar letting it run its course. However, I have thought about this and I think that you once you have recovered enough to travel I would like to abandon our current mission for the time being, and carry on to Rivendell. I would very much like Elrond to have a look at you after this."

Despite his discomfort, Estel smiled. "We would go to Rivendell? Can we send a message from Bree? I would like to ask my father to send a message to Legolas. Perhaps he could come and join us. I am sure his father will not be impressed but on the other hand I do not really care if Legolas just manages to come.

"We can do that, Estel." The older ranger laid a comforting hand on the younger ranger's shoulder. "I know very well that the last few months have not been easy for you."

The younger ranger rested much, but they also sat and talked. Perhaps it was the desperate need to talk or the fact that Halbarad knew him quite well already and knew Legolas, but Estel opened up to Halbarad in a way that he had done rarely to anyone else. He told the older ranger how desperately he missed Legolas, something he had not talked about with anyone until this point.

When Halbarad talked to him again about the possible long-term consequences of the illness he had contracted, Estel had been relatively unconcerned.

"As long as I can still make love, I do not think it matters that much. I do not plan on having children. Legolas cannot give me any, so it does not matter whether I can have any or not." There was such an absolute conviction in the young man's voice that Halbarad inwardly smiled.

Halbarad looked at the younger man seriously. "Have you ever thought through carefully what it might mean if you do not have children? And Legolas? This is not just about the two of you, there is much more at stake than two people's happiness. I know that you refuse to acknowledge this, but you would not be here if you did not know this to be true." Halbarad took a deep breath. He had talked about this with Elrond, it was time for Estel to fully acknowledge his situation.

"If you and Legolas want any chance of a future together, both of you will have to allow each other the space to have a family. It is not as much an issue for Legolas, he is still very young for an elf and after your death he will have still plenty of time to have children." Estel stared at the ranger. The almost brutal reference to his mortality shocked him.

"For you it is different. Gondor and Anor need a king, and there is only one of the royal bloodline left. You. Even if you do not take up your heritage, you must have heirs. Otherwise your bloodline ends with you and there will be no legitimate king for the future."

"For you, having children is not an option, it is a duty. In the end it will not matter much who the female is or whether you have any desire to lay with her. It will also not matter if you bond to her or not, a recognised heir borne out of wedlock into a royal line is much better than none. You and Legolas will have to accept this, it is part of who you are."

"If it ever comes to this, your future female partner may have to accept that she will not have your love, although you may well be able to find someone whom you respected and find pleasing. You have grown into a handsome young man, Estel, and I have no doubt that many maidens would not object to carrying your child."

Estel blushed. He was stunned by the frankness with which Halbarad had spoken. He could not imagine making love with anyone else but Legolas, but he was sufficiently honest with himself to admit that, as much as he disliked the fact, Halbarad had spoken the truth. A very unpleasant one. When he saw Legolas next, they would have to talk about this.

The older ranger continued. "I will not try to suggest that you and Legolas break up. I know that others have tried this, but I have seen you together and I do not believe that you will part. But you may have to accept that you can never formalise this relationship and that you, at least, will have to have a female partner, even if it is just for some time. You need children, Estel, and Legolas cannot give these to you."

"This is the reason why I am so concerned about this illness. Much depends on you, if you have no heirs, the line of kings would be truly broken. It is a great misfortune that you contracted this illness now rather than with four years of age, when it would have been quite harmless. When you return to Rivendell, you must have your father check you out. You need to know, it is an important aspect of your future."

Estel sat quietly for while, pondering what had been said. Unfortunately, there was much truth in Halbarad's words. However, these were not pleasant thoughts for Estel, and all of a sudden the young man realised how poorly he felt. He hurt all over and felt feverish again.

The older ranger saw the weariness and discomfort in Estel's eyes and suggested another rest. Estel followed this advice gladly, but the thoughts about his situation did not let him find rest. He felt himself trapped in a bizarre situation. He had not even fully accepted who he was, let alone felt like thinking about children for a kingdom that did not even exist at the moment.

Yet again, he wished that Legolas were with him, the elf would have helped him to sort it all out. And to be held by him when feeling so miserable … the thought alone almost drove Estel to tears. With a sigh, Estel turned over. There was no point in self-pity.

He only had one letter from Legolas in the eight months they had been apart. That letter had reached him just before he had left on his present journey, and he had carried it with him all the way, reading and rereading it until the parchment almost integrated. Legolas had not sounded very happy in Mirkwood. Estel wondered just how difficult things were with Legolas' father. With that thought, he drifted off to sleep.

The next few days passed quietly. Estel slept much, but still did not feel like eating. Halbarad was getting concerned about this, his younger companion had always been youthfully slim but since he joined the rangers he had lost weight, Halbarad was sure of that. He had noticed that Estel did not enjoy most of the food and often ate very little. Now, during this week, the young man had hardly eaten at all, on top of fighting this illness that had hit him much harder than it should have.

Yes, some time in Rivendell would be good for him, particularly if Legolas was there as well. Halbarad had accepted a long time ago that Legolas was a hugely important part in Estel's life and that this was unlikely to change. In some ways he envied the youngster, Halbarad himself had been married but his wife had died in childbirth when they were both much younger. The infant, a little boy, had not survived either. Since then, he had been alone.

Halbarad looked down on Estel, who was yet again sleeping. The swelling of his neck and face was much reduced, the fever seemed to have gone and Estel had mentioned earlier that the rest of his body was largely pain free as well. The older ranger decided that they would stay another day and then carry on. They had been fortunate – the weather had held and no one had found their little camp. Better not to push their luck too much.

Halbarad reflected over the last few months. He knew very well how difficult this time had been for Estel. There had been dozens of small incidents that had betrayed the young man's unfamiliarity with his own people.

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When they were not on patrol Estel stayed with Halbarad in his small but neat wooden house. On the first evening, he had shown Estel around. The house was not large, just two rooms, one which functioned as a sitting room and kitchen, the other a bedroom. After looking around, Estel asked: "Halbarad, I do not want to be rude or awkward, but where do you wash and do … mhm… other things?"

Halbarad sighed. He knew that this was one area where the customs of elves and men differed quite a bit. "There is a facility outside. I get water from the well in the village square and occasionally have a bath in the river. Estel, I think you will notice quite soon that on the whole men are less … meticulous about their personal care. Therefore many men wash much less frequently than elves – you must have noticed that when we were in Bree."

Estel had noticed it, the resulting odour was difficult not to notice. "I hope you do not mind if I continue to bath in the river, I do not mind if it is cold."

"No, I don't. But expect to be asked about it by others, it is unusual."

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Another memorable incident had happened at the annual Selection of Trainees in mid-summer, a big event where the rangers and their families from near and far would meet in one place. All thirteen-year-old boys and girls would be presented with their name and family, and competitions were held to identify those with the most potential in different areas. This included archery, sword fighting, running, tracking, herb lore, art, smithery, tailoring, cookery, and animal husbandry. The craft masters or recognised leaders in each area could then choose their apprentices. Other crafts were represented as well, but not all held competitions. Generally speaking there was a strict separation between boys and girls, normally only the masters of herb lore, art and animal husbandry would consider boys and girls alike, all others would usually only take on girls or boys.

Estel and Halbarad had been watching the archery competition. The field had been reduced to three competing young archers, two boys and one girl. The young man noticed that the two boys were good, but the girl was outstanding. She hit every target dead centre and shot with a speed and precision that Estel had rarely seen in a mortal, let alone in someone this age. The girl was tall and lanky, her dark hair tied into two plaits. She won the competition easily, but Estel noticed the hesitation in the speaker's voice when the result was announced.

Immediately after the competition, the two best archers of the community came and approached the two boys. It was clear from their reactions that the two youngsters were offered training places with the archers, rare and therefore prestigious. Estel watched the two boys returning to their families, being embraced and cheered for their success. The winner of competition sat alone and forgotten on a small rocky outcrop, her bow in her hands, looking dejected.

"Halbarad, why are they not taking that girl? Her shooting is much better than that of those boys!"

Halbarad looked at him in surprise. "No one would take a girl for archery. She would never be able to keep up with the training."

"This one would. Look at her, she is already tall. She will be strong and has much potential. She should be given a chance. Besides, it is such a waste!"

"The elves do not have female archers. Why expect it here?"

"They do. You have probably not noticed. Many male and female elves do not look that different when they wear similar clothes. It is not common, but if a maiden shows true potential like this one has, she would be taken gladly,"

"I did not know that." Halbarad mentally tried to remember the faces of the elven archers he had encountered. Estel was right, many of them had that eternally youthful look that could belong to either gender, and most of the archers wore cloaks when he had seen them, hiding their bodies.

"It strikes me as such a waste of potential not to train that girl further. I could do it…"

"Estel, you are new here. Do not interfere with the archery master's decision. They do not like it if their area of expertise is interfered with, particularly not by very young strangers. Do not even think about it."

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With a blink, Halbarad's thoughts refocused on the present. There had been many more incidents like this. All of a sudden, the ranger realised that the forest was eerily quiet. All the normal small sounds of the forest had stopped. And then he heard them. Orcs! And by the sound of them, many.

Halbarad took a quick decision. He was not normally one to run from a fight, but there were only two of them and Estel was not in good shape. They had not yet been spotted.

He turned and woke Estel.

TBC. Please review.