The Sailor Senshi of America Episode 4: The Meeting
(PG 13)
By: sweet satun
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As you all know I don't own Sailor Moon & co. & all the standard disclaimers apply. Tell me what you think. PLEASE I really want feedback. Feel free to make suggestions, comments, and compliments.
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It was yet another bright and beautiful day in Little Tokyo. The SSOA were just settling down to lunch when all of a sudden a loud beeping noise was heard.
"Where is that stupid noise coming from?!" demanded an irritated Makoto.
"It sounds like somebody's trying to page us," said Ami. As soon as those words were out of Ami's mouth, a kawaii little object appeared on each of the senshi's wrist, each in it's senshi's color. The object was a star shaped compact on a wristband , which was actually a communicator.
"These are just sooooooo kawaii!" exclaimed Minako.
"Let's just open them and see who's paging us, if it isn't important the person's gonna be really sorry they interupted our lunch hour!" said Hotaru, as she opened her communicator up. Each of the other girls did the same. They each found to their suprise Alfred the flying fish they met in the very beginning was the one paging them.
"Hey it's about time you remembered me! I'd forgotten all about these until now! If it weren't for these I'd probably die from starvation! You're supposed to meet with me daily, discuss your newfound powers, and most importantly FEED ME! But noooooo, nobody remembered poor Alfred! You were all busy discovering new powers, senshi, and battling evil to worry about poor me. You couldn't even stop by to drop in a few nice pieces of cherry pie or even dump some fish food in here! If it weren't for the few water bugs that ocassionally landed in the fountain I would've starved to death!" scolded Alfred.
"Ok, what kind of fish eats cherry pie?" asked Makoto.
"I do!" exclaimed Alfred, "I'm not just any ordinary fish you know. I'll have you know that I am a giant, talking, and flying fish who also happens to be your guardian whom you 've seem to totally have forgotten for 2 whole episodes!"
"Well it wasn't our fault, we didn't feed you. It's the author's fault for not having us feed you, so yell at her not us!"
"Hey author! How come you didn't have the senshi come by and feed me?!"
"UMMMMM......BECAUSE I FORGOT! I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I'VE HAD A LOT OF STUFF ON MY MIND AND THINGS TO DO! SO DON'T EXPECT ME TO ALWAYS REMEMBER TO HAVE YOU FED! BESIDES YOU'RE A FLYING FISH, WHY CAN'T YOU FLY OUT OF THAT FOUNTAIN AND GET YOURSELF SOMETHING TO EAT?!" said the thunderous voice from above, which belonged to a very irritable sweet saturn.
"Well because you never had me do that! Remember you're the author who controls everything! I can't fly out and get something to eat unless you put it in the story that I do!" snapped Alfred.
"Oh,well,uhhhhh....heh...." said a very sheepish sweet saturn as a very large anime sweatdrop appeared on her head, "Sorry I didn't think about that 'til now."
"Hey, you lost your loud thunderous voice as well as your capitals," pointed out Ami.
"What?! Oh. I MEAN, OH! THANKS FOR POINTING THAT OUT." said sweet saturn once again remembering her capitals and her thunderous voice.
"Well what are you going to do about my situation?!" demanded Alfred.
"WILL YOU HUSH UP! IF YOU'D BE QUIET, I'D ACTUALLY HAVE THE CHANCE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT! SO CAN IT!" snapped the loud thunderous voice from above.
"Hmph!" replied Alfred.
"Oh, poor Alfred! We're sorry we forgot to feed you! We'll be over there in a few minutes," said Minako. "And I'll bring over the dozen cherry pies I just finished baking," added Makoto, as she pulled out the dozen fresh cherry pies she had just finished baking. "Hey, since when did I bake these cherry pies anyways? I don't remember baking them," said Makoto.
"SINCE NOW! IF I SAY YOU JUST BAKED A DOZEN CHERRY PIES THEN YOU DID! BY THE WAY THINKING AND SPEAKING OF CHERRY PIE MAKES ME HUNGRY! BREAKFAST BREAK!" replied the thunderous voice from above. "OK BACK!" announced the thunderous voice from above after a few minutes.
"That was quick," said Minako, "And by the way isn't it supposed to be lunch time?"
"IT'S LUNCH TIME FOR YOU AND BREAKFAST FOR ME! AND I DID NOT EAT BREAKFAST THAT QUICK! I JUST BROUGHT IT OVER TO THE COMPUTER SO I COULD EAT AND TYPE AT THE SAME TIME!," said the loud thunderous voice from above inbetween bites of her Kellogs Nutri Grain Strawberries and Cream Twists bar. $CHA- CHING$ "HADN'T DONE THAT IN A LONG TIME! I'M RUNNIN' LOW ON CASH SO IT'S ONCE AGAIN TIME FOR ENDORSEMENTS!" she added, "Now back to the story!"
The girls quickly gathered the pies together, putting each in a Ziplock bag, $CHA-CHING$ and then placed them all together in one big bag, and headed toward Central Tokyo to visit Alfred. When they returned from feeding Alfred, they each found in their individual breifcases, an invitation to a ball held by one of the most popular guys in school, Saphire.
"Hey wait a minute! I thought Saphire was dead," said a slightly puzzled Minako.
"NO HE ISN'T!" exclaimed the thunderous voice from above. "YOU WANNA KNOW WHY?! BECAUSE THIS MY WORLD WHERE WE DO THINGS MY WAY! AND IF I SAY SAPHIRE IS REALLY VERY HOT AND ALIVE AND WELL, THEN YOU BETTER AGREE WITH ME! BECAUSE I AM THE ALL MIGHTY AND POWERFUL AUTHOR, SO EHHH! DON'T EVER QUESTION MY AUTHORITY AGAIN!" she added.
"So who are you going with to the ball?" Ami asked Hotaru.
"That really really hot guy named Zagato, and what about you?" replied Hotaru.
Ami blushed, and then answered, "That cute and sweet guy named Ferrio."
Meanwhile Makoto asked Minako the exact same question. Minako then answered, "That oh so hot guy named Lantis!" replied Minako.
"Well I'm going with that absolutly adorable guy named Rymin' Ryco," declared Makoto.
(Note: Sorry that I didn't follow the tradition of using the guys from BSSM, but you gotta admit the guys from MKR are way hotter and better than the guys from BSSM! Also I couldn't resist using Rymin Ryco (Jr.) , he's perfect for Mako! .)
The evening of the ball finally came, and the SSOA were all over at Hotaru's house preparing for the ball.
The girls were finishing the final touches to their ensemble. Each was dressed in a lovely gown of silk and satin designed by Disney. $CHA-CHING$
(Note: Can't help but love the Disney dresses! .)
Hotaru was wearing a dress resembling that of Snow White's, Ami's dress resembled that of Cinderella's, Makoto's resembled that of Belle's (from Beauty and the Beast), and Minako's resembled that of Aurora's (from Sleeping Beauty).
"Look at my shoes! They are just so cool and they're made of glass!" exclamed Ami ecstatically as twirled around in her new glass slippers while showing them off.
"Well mine are made of satin and they have little bows on them!" said Hotaru in reply to Ami as she displayed her lovely satin shoes.
"Well my shoes maybe plain but they're made of silk, are yellow, and match my dress!" added Makoto as she lifted her skirts above her ankles showing her yellow silk shoes.
"So are mine!" exclaimed Minako. "Except they're blue!" she added.
Suddenly the doorbell rang, interupting their dispute over shoes. The girls hurridly flew down the stairs and made a mad dash for the door, Ami with her nose stuck in a book. She then interupted the race by saying,"According to my book on dating we're supposed to wait." The girls stopped dead in their tracks.
"!#$$%!&&!#!%!" exclaimed the senshi, colliding into each other, then falling into a heap at the bottom of the stairs. They quickly got up dusted themselves off, and regained their composure.
"Let's play it cool girls," said Hotaru smoothly as they walked up the staircase. The girls walked back up the staircase and into Hotaru's room.
"Ok, now what do we do?" asked Minako. Ami after consulting her book, looked up and said, "Hotaru you're dad's supposed answer the door."
"Oh," said Hotaru as she walked across the room and stuck her head out the door. She then shouted at the top of her lungs,thinking Ami had said phone not door, "DAD CAN YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?!" Professor Tomoe who was by now used to this, sat calmly and comfortably on the couch while reading the newspaper, as objects were flying to and fro.
He replied calmly as ever, "Honey, the phone's not ringing."
"Oh," said Hotaru as she put her head back inside the room.
"Hotaru, I said door not phone," corrected Ami.
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh," said Hotaru. She quickly took a deep breath and stuck her head out the door once more and shouted even louder, "DAD CAN YOU ANSWER THE DOOR?!" Basically the whole house was blown away except for the frame,door,the staircase, the upper floor and rooms, and of course Professor Tomoe himself, his newspaper, and couch.
"Sure," he replied still calm, with not a hair even toussled, folded his newspaper, got up from the couch, and answered the door.
"They're upstairs and should be down in a moment," he said allowing the dumbstruck boys to enter what remained of the house.
"Does....this always happen?" asked Lantis.
"Oh, all the time," replied Professor Tomoe dismissing the question with a careless wave of his hand. "But you get used to it. Watch this," he said as he pressed a little button. The house automatically began repairing itself, and in a few minutes was back to it's original form. "I've created a program for our house which allows it to adapt to and rebuild itself in any condition, wether it be a hurricane or just Hotaru's regular shouting," he added smugly.
"Wow," was all the guys could think of to say.
The girls then appeared one by one, and gracefully descended down the staircase.
"We didn't even hear you come in," said Makoto sweetly. The girls each paired up with their dates and were escorted to their personal horse drawn carriages. They quickly arrived at the manor where the ball was being held, and quickly set about dancing and having fun.
Meanwhile the nameless evil hentai villian, who we have not heard from in so long, was plotting on how to capture the SSOA, destroy them, and takeover the world, turning it into an etchi evil place filled with hentai. After several hours of serious thinking, he came up with a plan.
Back at the party the SSOA girls had just met up with the FSOA girls and were having a nice chat about all the many ways to destroy evil and save the world, when suddenly four demonic looking youma with several large tenticles, sent by the evil hentai viilian, burst through the walls. "All right girls you know the routine!" said Ami. The girls all nodded and whipped out their transformation pens.
"Saturn Kawaii Power..." said Hotaru.
"Jupiter Kawaii Power..."said Makoto.
"Mercury Kawaii Power..." said Ami.
"Venus Kawaii Power..." said Minako.
"No Tan Kawaii Power..."said Hayley.
"Pyrofreak Kawaii Power..."said Heather.
"Cosmetic Kawaii Power..."said Nerissa.
"Sun Kawaii Power..."said Sabrina.
"Earth Kawaii Power..."said Kristen.
"Make-up!" shouted the girls in unison as they completed the final stage of their transformations. They all struck dramatic and glamourous poses, announced their arrival with kawaii speeches, then began to attack the youma, but to no prevail. The youma each snatched up one of the SSOA and carried them off to the secret headquarters of the evil hentai villian. There they were each bound to a stiff, stone, high back chair. Suddenly they noticed a figure hidden within the shadows.
"Welcome," said an icy voice which could only belong to the evil hentai villian,"I've been looking forward to this day for a very long time."
"Ha! Just because you've captured us doesn't mean that you've won the war!" shouted Makoto as she spat at the figure.
"Yeah and if you're so great, why don't you show yourself?!" demanded Minako. "Very well then, replied the icy voice. As the figure stepped out of the shadows they noticed he was also holding and stroking a very familiar yellow animal that kept repeating the word "Pika". They were the two figures that struck fear into the hearts of people everywhere, it was "GASP" Rubeus and Pikachu!
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" screamed the SSOA. It was a scream that exceded even Venus's "Teen Idol Shriek", it was a painful thing to listen to, and it made your blood run cold for it was a scream of fear, pure fear like no one had ever known.
"CAN IT ALREADY!" exclaimed Rubeus. The senshi soon stopped, knowing that screaming would get them no where, and that only using their intelligence would get them out of this mess if not the FSOA or their boyfriends.
"Now, that you've all settled down. It's time I become a gracious host and present you with some entertainment," said Rubeus as he set the Pikachu on a nearby chair, and then uncovered a rather large T.V. The girls all gasped for they knew what they were going to be forced to watch repeatedly......POKEMON EPISODES AND MOVIES. "Judging by your expressions of horor I see you've already guessed my little suprise," said a sinister Rubeus. With that he turned on the T.V. and the torture began. After what seemed like an eternity which actually was only a few hours the T.V. was switched off. The senshi all heaved a giant sigh of relief, but this brief moment of peace was shortly lived. "Also for your entertainment I am going to read to you terribly written, detailed, and disgusting hentai fanfics! Mgyukckgagkayiguika!" he chuckled evily, as he began reading.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" screamed all the senshi.
Meanwhile the FSOA were confering with the SKOA (Sailor Knights of America) about how to rescue the SSOA while still trying to lock in their coordinates. All this was to no prevail, so they all had to return to their homes in hopes that the next day would bring better results. A week went by without any results. Finally on Saturday evening they were able to pinpoint the coordinates of the evil hentai villian's headquarters.
"Come on guys let's go!" ordered Zagato. He as well as the other SKOA quickly transformed and doing what most guys do rushed off to save the day without even having a plan.
"Hey! Wait for us!" shouted Sabrina after them.
"Typical guys," said Nerissa.
"How rude!" exclaimed Heather.
"Well might as well go after them, they're gonna end up getting captured or something like that," said Kristen thoughtfully.
"All then let's get to it!" ordered Hayley. The girls quickly transformed and raced after the guys.
Meanwhile the guys had already reached the headquarters, and had just broken down the door.
"I am Zagato better known as Saturn Knight and I order you to set these beautiful innocent sailor senshi free or you'll have me and the rest of the SKOA to deal with!" The other knights just nodded in agreement. Rubeus began cracking up instantly.
"The SKOA," he said inbetween laughs, "That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard of! First the SSOA! Then FSOA! And now the SKOA! I swear you all are the biggest bunch of losers I've ever seen!" The SKOA being as macho and full of pride as all guys of course quickly resorted to violence, and attempted to beat the crap out of Rubeus, but were stopped by his Pikachu's electric shock attack.
"Take them to the brainwashing room, and fill their heads with plenty of etchi thoughts," Rubeus ordered the four youmas standing nearby. With that they guys were dragged off to be brainwashed. Suddenly a loud crash sounded as five senshi jumped through the skylight window and landed gracefully on their feet without a scratch.
"We are the FSOA! And in the name of sailor senshi fans everywhere we will punish you!" declared Sailor No Tan.
"Hey where are you by the way?" questioned Rubeus looking all around for the source of the voice.
"Right here! No Tan Pale Peaches Blast!" shouted the invisible Sailor No Tan. Rubeus managed to dodge the attack, but the Pikachu wasn't so lucky. It was hurled into and held to the wall by a sticky mass of pale peaches.
He grabbed a can of deinvisbility powder and threw it everywhere, and unluckily most of it landed directly upon Sailor No Tan causing her to lose her invisibility. He quickly grabbed her, threw her into, and bound her to a chair. He did like so with each of the remaining senshi except without using the deinvisibility powder. Actually he managed to catch all but one senshi and that was Sailor Pyrofreak, for she was the youngest, smallest, and nimblest of all the senshi.
"You're a really bad person!" she said shaking her finger at him. "My mommy says that all people who like Pokemon are gonna go to Hell! She also says that people who like nasty hentai are going to Hell too! So you're gonna get there twice as fast! Unlike me because I'm a good girl who likes Sailor Moon and fiery inferno, which is oh so cool, and listens to my mommy!"
"Shutup kid!" Rubeus shouted as he tried fruitlessly to grab her. Eventually he managed to capture her and bind her. "You're one loudmouth and annoying kid you know that?" he said pointing his finger dangerously close to her mouth. Sailor Pyrofreak replied by biting his finger as hard as she could.
"I'll have you know I'm not a kid! I'm 9 years old and soon to be 10, and my mommy is gonna get you for this! I waaaaaaaaaaant my mommy!" she exclaimed.
Rubeus quickly shoved a gag into her mouth in an attempt to keep her quiet. Suddenly the SKOA reemerged from the brainwashing room and bowed before Rubeus, saying "We await your commands oh great lord of hentai Rubeus."
"Very well then," said Rubeus, "I order you to do kinky things to all the senshi!" "It shall be done," said they replied in unison. Sailor Pyrofreak managed to spit out the gag and as the SKOA started advancing closer to the senshi, she screamed at the top her lungs,
"MOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Her scream was heard all around the world, in all dimensions, and of course by her mother.
"Coming sweetie!" In the blink of an eye she was at the Rubeus's headquarters. She quickly smacked some sense into the SKOA, and returned them to their normal selves. She quickly freed the senshi and then stated in an angry and merciless tone of voice, "I am the mother of Sailor Pyrofreak and I make it my duty to see that my darling little girl and any of her friends are never harmed. And since you were trying to do so, you're going to be punished! In the name of mothers everywhere I will punish you!"
"I don't think so," said Rubeus confidently for he thought not even the mother of Sailor Pyrofreak could defeat him.
"Hentai youma attack!" he shouted, and with the four giant youmas with tenticles advanced towards the senshi and knights and Pyrofreak's mother.
Sailor Pyrofreak's mother just stood calmly and shouted," Killer teddy bear attack!" Suddenly a giant murderous looking teddy bear appeared and pulverized the youma. Rubeus with the odds now against him tried to flee, but only suceeded in running into Sailor Pyrofreak's mother, who grabbed him by his ear and hauled him off to "The Corner". It was a place for all evil villians to learn a good lesson. They were forced to eat vegetables and good wholesome food, watch good wholesome T.V. shows, get along with others, and other things of that nature. Oh, and as for the Pikachu, Pyrofreak's mom took care of it too, she sent it to a labratory to be test specimen. Meanwhile the senshi & knights all detransformed and returned home to a well deserved rest.
The End