CHAPTER FOUR

A "Love Cruise", You Say?

The next day, the rain had stopped, and Hiei was once again dragged to the beach. He was in a little bit better spirits today because Kuwabara was still out cold.

"It's hard to believe that seeing us kiss could shock him that much," Hiei said to Shadow as they walked towards the beach.

"Well, we were purposely doing a bit more than kissing," Shadow said. Yusuke's eyes snapped towards them.

"A bit more than kissing? What could you have been doing that was more than kissing? Were you groping each other too? Sending each other telepathic images and sensations? I knew you were having too much fun!"

"Yes, of course. Then after we dragged you and Baka-baka to your own room, we went and had sex," Shadow said sarcastically. Yusuke's jaw dropped and he stopped dead in his tracks, staring at them. They stopped to watch him. He moved his mouth, but all that came out was a little squeak. Obviously, he had missed the sarcasm. Hiei turned away and chuckled. Shadow couldn't help but torture the boy some more.

"Sure. Ask Kurama. He was there, after all..."

Yusuke turned his squeaks and wide eyes towards Kurama. The redhead just chuckled and kept walking.

"You want to join in next time?" Shadow asked. Eclipse choked and hurried after Kurama. Hiei smirked.

"He's got a girlfriend, and he can stay with her. You're mine," he said. Yusuke let out one long, drawn-out, strangled squeak before he fell flat on his face. Shadow and Hiei laughed.

"Oh please. Tell me they aren't going into another laughing fit..." Eclipse muttered.

"Well if they are, we can just throw them in the ocean," Kurama suggested.

"Oh. That sounds good," Eclipse said, smiling. Hiei grabbed Yusuke's arms and dragged him down the street the rest of the way to the beach.

Well, eventually Kuwabara and Yusuke woke up and went about their beachly activities.

Around three thirty, Hiei was snoozing (That word doesn't seem to fit him...) on a beach towel, and Shadow decided he looked comfy, so she curled up with his stomach as a pillow and fell asleep.

Then, around four o'clock, some lady came around with a clipboard and a camera. She spotted them.

"Aww..." She snapped a picture. Instantly, Shadow was awake.

"Who took my picture?! Cameras suck out your soul!"

The lady chuckled. "Are your parents anywhere around?"

"Parents? I'm fifteen. I haven't had parents for about... five years now."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that... Your guardians, then?"

"Look, lady, I don't even know your name and you're asking to talk to my parents. Why?"

"You and your boyfriend have won yourselves places on a cruise."

Shadow quirked an eyebrow at Hiei. "What kind of cruise?"

"A love cruise."

Instantly, Shadow's mind filled with evil. "When?"

"Well, it leaves tomorrow at noon."

Shadow's smile got wider. Hiei was a bit nervous because of that look. By this point, the rest of the gang had gathered around.

"How long?"

"One full week. Seven days of looooove," the woman said. Shadow's eyes sparkled, and her smile threatened to pop off her face and go about murdering innocent bystanders with a mind of its own.

"We'll go. Does it cost anything? Are there four more vacancies?"

"It's free... yes, there's more vacancies... who did you have in mind?"

Shadow pointed at Kurama and Eclipse, then at Yusuke and Kuwabara.

"Are they..."

"Gay?" Shadow finished, since the lady seemed hesitant. She nodded. "But surely you're not against that? Have an open mind!"

Yusuke and Kuwabara were glaring daggers. Eclipse and Kurama looked at each other nervously.

"Okay... I'll need your names..."

After a few more minutes, everything was set, and Shadow was dancing around singing the banana boat song. She was promptly slammed in the head with a surfboard (wielded by Yusuke) and fell face first into the sand.

The next day.

Evilness shall occur, Shadow says, and it shall occur. At noon, be prepared for Hell to be set loose upon the lands... or seas, whichever the hell Hell may happen to be nearest to.

The group was at the designated meeting point around 11:50. The lady with the clipboard called role by couples. Yusuke and Kuwabara very grudgingly acknowledged being called the Urameshi couple, shooting Shadow loathing looks as she stood hand in hand with Hiei.

Once on the boat, they were showed to their rooms. Each room had a king sized bed ("So you'll have plenty of room for whatever you do!" as the lady had said. *shudder*) and really extravagant stuff, and people couldn't help but wonder why they were getting this for free.

Shadow was suspicious, but she was planning on havoc being wreaked anyway, so it didn't matter. Friendly girl, don't you think?

"So, what shall we do first, Hiei?" Shadow asked in the proper, polite manner many of the people she'd eavesdropped on during their tour had been using.

"First, lose the manners."

"Yes, sir!"

"Second..." Hiei's voice trailed off as he looked around. "This room is way to neat... It's scary."

"I can fix that!"

Shadow went around the room flinging candy wrappers and unmade the bed and put stuff out of order on the shelves.

"There. Happy?" she said when she was done with her ten minute un-organizing. Hiei looked around.

"Yes. More so than I was before, at least."

Somebody knocked on the door.

"Who iiiiiiiis iiiiiiiiit?" Shadow called.

"Me."

"And me."

"Well, you're so very welcome to come in, me," Shadow said, opening the door to Kurama and Eclipse. Eclipse had an odd look on her face and dragged Shadow off for a second, saying, "If that comma had been missing, I'm afraid I would have had a breakdown. Lucky for us all that you're such a good grammar student."

Two seconds later Eclipse had a large bump on her head.

I'm sorry about that little flash of pervertedness... It comes from hanging out with the people I do (I've used that excuse before...).

"What the heck happened to your room?" Kurama asked, looking around at the horrid disarray. "We've been here for fifteen minutes!"

Eclipse got a look on her face and received another bump on her head.

"Shadow disorganized it."

"... Why?"

"It was too organized, so I made a mess out of it," Shadow said, holding a swirly-eyed Eclipse up by her throat.

"Oh... Well..." Kurama's voice trailed off as he noticed Eclipse. Shadow instantly dropped her and got an innocent smile and a sweat drop as she sidled away to hide behind Hiei.

"What's up?" Hiei asked.

"I don't understand you, Shadow," Kurama said, sighing. "This is a love cruise and you have to go and kill your best friend. Do you even know how to love?" He didn't mean it rudely, but even if he had, Shadow wouldn't have cared.

"Yes I do. I love Hiei," Shadow said, wrapping her arms around Hiei's neck and nuzzling her cheek against his.

"Ooookee dokee..."

"Just kidding," Shadow said, wandering away. Hiei and Kurama exchanged glances.

"So... uh... Why'd you drop by after ten minutes?" Hiei asked. "Surely nothing so important came up that you had to see us instantly."

"No. Eclipse sat down on the bed, looked around the room, and decided I was boring, so she decided she wanted to talk to Shadow, and since we're supposed to be together I came with her, but obviously she doesn't want to talk to Shadow anymore, so..."

"What's this?" Shadow asked suddenly from the bathroom.

"You probably don't want to know, Shadow. Leave it where it is," Hiei called.

"But it's scary... Come here!"

Hiei sighed, flashing a 'hang on a second, I'll deal with this' look at Kurama, and walked into the bathroom. Kurama walked into their room and closed the door, as several people passing in the hallways were giving him funny looks. There were muffled voices from the bathroom and a second later Hiei walked out, leading Shadow by her wrist.

"But it--"

"What do you say we go out onto the deck?" Hiei said, and without waiting for consent from Kurama, dragged Shadow out the door. Kurama picked up Eclipse and followed.

Out on deck, Hiei plopped Shadow down in a chair at one of the little tables for two and sat down across from her.

"Okay, now, let's pick a subject and sit here and have a nice convers--" Hiei started, but a loud yell stopped him.

"HIEI!"

He looked around and saw Yusuke and Kuwabara walking towards him.

"I oughta throttle you!" Yusuke snapped.

"Why?" Hiei asked innocently.

"Actually I oughta throttle SHADOW!"

"Eep!" Shadow yelped, darting behind Hiei for cover.

"They gave us some special room for gay dudes, you witch!"

"Well," Shadow said, smiling nervously, "would you rather be on a cruise in a room for gay guys, or would you rather be completely alone back on the beach with no way to spy on us two and Kurama and Eclipse?"

"I actually think... I'd rather be here," Yusuke said.

"That's the spirit! You're not gay, so it doesn't matter that you're in a special gay-guys room, it's not like you're going to use it for what it was intended," Shadow said. Then she added suspiciously, narrowing her eyes, "Are you?"

"NO!"

"Jolly good. So what does it matter?"

"It doesn't, really, I suppose..." Yusuke said cluelessly.

"Jolly good! So what kind of stuff can we do here?" Shadow asked, looking around.

"There's a pool, somewhere... and tennis... and... at night they put on plays and have special candlelit dinners if you order them..." Kurama said.

"How do you... Oh."

Kurama was reading out of a pamphlet he'd found somewhere or other. Leave it to the fox to use his brains.

"Well... To the pool, I say," Shadow said. "General census?"

"POOL!!!" Eclipse screamed. Nobody seemed to have noticed when she woke up, but obviously she had, so... "Lead the way, oh mighty smart fox man!"

"Eclipse..."

"Yeah?"

"... Never mind. Let's go," Kurama said, walking away. Shadow jumped up and followed him with Eclipse right beside her. The other three boys followed a bit more reluctantly than the girls, but there was nothing else to do, so...

Anywho, this is just the wonderful introduction to the doom that will ensue while on this cruise. Okay, so nothing of great doomiful significance happened, but it'll get pretty wild. Don't worry. ^_^ I was just kinda anxious to get this chappie up before people started booing me and throwing various rotten fruits and small furry animals... *Mreow!*