The Low Down: I was quite happy with the last chapter. I'm also quite happy with my story outline. This is going to be one of those transitional chapters, so forgive this being slow and not exactly the most plot moving. But I'm using it as a bit of background info/ exposition stuff, and it is almost straight-up a Miroku chapter… so it makes me happy. J
Stone Gardens
Chapter 6
Guilty Conscience
***
Not all the sheep in all the world would help her sleep tonight.
The covers were too hot, but when she kicked them off, the air was too cold. Her pajama bottoms got tangled around her ankles uncomfortably, but with all her tossing, there was no way to prevent that. Kagome huffed and flopped once again on her pillow in exasperation, and eyes long since accustomed to the dim light stared up at the ceiling.
She was afraid. Actually afraid to go to sleep. She'd never in her life ever had a nightmare so horrible to make her want to never dream again, but every time she closed her eyes, she could still see herself with that malicious smile. She was afraid of herself in those dreams where she destroyed a helpless Inuyasha.
Inuyasha... Kagome's heart clenched in pity for the demon boy. Completely alone in a new world and at the mercy of whoever would pass by during the day, he had no one to help him or to trust.
All he had was her, and her homicidal nightmares. Poor guy...
'I want to help him.' Kagome thought miserably. 'But where in the world would I start? I don't know magic... don't know anything about spells.'
Maybe she should have asked Sango, but then she'd had five-hundred years and hadn't figured out a way to break the spell. But if two angels couldn't do it, what would a little school girl be able to do? Who else could she ask?
An image of her grandfather running about the shrine waving charms and spouting about his newest magical discovery flinted across her mind and almost brought a smile. The old man would probably die of a heart attack if she asked his advice over the mystical, and she also doubted he'd have any viable information.
But her grandfather did have a library... and although he may not know the difference between a water sprite and a garden gnome, a massive pile of ancient spell books might at least contain a clue.
And it didn't look like she'd be getting any sleep any time soon.
"Might as well." she sighed and threw her blankets to the side.
She padded down the shadowy halls on silent toes and made her way to the library. The door creaked slightly as she slid it open, but seemed loud in the quiet night.
The room was brighter, with a large window letting in the bright moon light. It was also much larger than she'd thought, with rows upon rows of ancient looking books and mountains of old scrolls strewn about. One could be lost in here for years and maybe not find what they needed!
But in the middle of the cluttered knowledge, she saw Miroku, pouring over a massive book in the center of a little table and looking very tired. He hadn't even noticed her yet, it seemed, by the way he was concentrating on the crackling yellowed pages.
Kagome took a step backwards towards the door, thinking she'd just come back later and not disturb him (or perhaps avoid him all together), but a floorboard creaked under her bare foot. Miroku looked up surprised, but his eyes softened as he saw her.
"Good evening, Miss Kagome." he said quietly.
"Hi..." she said shakily.
He smiled gently and motioned for her to come closer. She nervously approached and watched his every move but he never lost the gentle, inviting smile.
"What keeps you awake so late at night?" he said.
"Couldn't sleep." she whispered.
"Ahh." he nodded. "Yes, that is understandable, given recent happenings." A quick wave of his hand invited her to take a seat.
"What are you doing up?" She asked as she slipped into the chair across from him.
"Just a little light reading." he smiled. "But if I were to bet, I would say you've come to search for what I look for as well." His voice became grave.
"Inuyasha?" she met his eyes which nodded to her. "Miroku..." she started, "Can I ask you something?"
"Anything you wish."
"It was Kikyo who cast the spell on Inuyasha, right?"
"Yes, that is true." Miroku nodded.
"And I used to be Kikyo?"
His eyes widened and he stammered, "What would make you ask..."
"Sango told me. She said she watched over the soul until it was reborn in my body." Kagome said with emotion.
"You weren't supposed to know that." Miroku smiled gently to her.
"So it's my fault..." her eyes trembled. "It's my fault he's like that."
"Miss Kagome," Miroku reached over the parchments and took her hand gently. "It is true that what happened to Inuyasha and Kikyo was tragic, but it was none of your doing."
"But it was my soul." She persisted.
"Kagome," he sighed, "this is difficult to explain. A soul is not a fixed variable in a person's character. It changes and grows based on your experiences and yet retains something unique to itself with each life until it rests completely in peace. You share something with Kikyo through the soul, but also you have changed the soul to fit yourself. Whatever made Kikyo attack was not an act of the soul that you now possess and was none of your doing."
"I..." she stared at the hand over hers, somehow it seemed like an angel shouldn't feel like just any other person. She'd kind of expected him to not be solid or be tingly. "I just feel guilty."
"Believe me, Kagome." Miroku said sincerly, "You have nothing to feel guilty about. I on the other hand, would seem to have much to atone for."
She met his eyes surprised.
"It was me who planned to mislead your family into coming here." He said. "I wanted to bring you here because I hopped you'd have some way to break the spell. And you have, in a way. Inuyasha has awoken, but things haven't worked out completely as I'd hoped."
He gave her a quick wink and withdrew his hand from hers. "So for my part, Kagome, I thank you for your help in waking Inuyasha. Now, I have only to find the way to remove the rest of the curse."
"I'd like to help, Miroku." she said quietly. "I don't know what to do, but I want to help, if that's alright?"
"I think that would be just fine." Miroku smiled and turned pulled open another book.
Kagome smiled and leafed through a pile of old papers. "So what am I looking for?"
~*~
"Miss Higurashi?" The marshmallow rabbit called to her. Silly rabbit... it was about to be a chubby bunny. "Miss Higurashi!" It snapped at her viscously.
Kagome's eyes snapped open and she popped her head back up from her desk amidst the giggles of her classmates. She found herself eye-to-eye with an agitated algebra teacher.
"As you don't see the need to pay attention, Miss Higurashi," the old man's forehead crinkled in irritation, "perhaps you would like to demonstrate problems on the board?"
Kagome held down the lump in her throat as she looked over the completely foreign writings on the wall and momentarily forgot how to speak.
"Are you not prepared to work the assignment?" her teacher sneered and she gave a bashful shake of the head. "Then you would do well to pay attention!" He snapped.
Kagome let out a relieved breath when he turned away from her and returned to the front of the room.
"And Miss Higurashi, you will report for detention after classes this evening." He said without looking back at her.
She chose to ignore the snickering grins many classmates turned to her as well as the sympathetic looks from her friends.
He just had to wake her up in the first non horrifying dream she'd mustered in a long time. Of course if she could get no peaceful sleep at home, she would be able to dream happily where she wasn't allowed to sleep, and now a detention on top of everything else in her crazed life.
"Just great." she sighed and turned her eyes quickly back to her math book. The rest of class was a blur of factorials and exponentials until with the ever-loved ring of the bell, her class all grabbed their bags and made their way to the door.
She shuffled through the door quickly, pointedly not looking at her teacher for fear of whatever horrible look he must be sending her.
The door swung shut, and had Kagome paid attention, she would have seen her teacher, though slightly smug, paid her no further thought as he leafed through his next class' lecture notes. He went to sit at his desk to prepare for the next group of students when the chair slipped quickly from under him.
Kagome missed her teacher landing flat on the floor in a confused stupor and sputtering as he looked for whatever might have pulled his chair away.
"Kagome!" a voice called her attention in the busy hall. Three girls rushed up to her with concern and irritation on her part. "That was horrible what he did to you!" Yuka cried.
"You look exhausted." Eri said with worry and placed a hand on her forehead.
"I'm alright." she smiled and pushed her friend's hand away. "Just tired. I didn't sleep well last night."
"Is something wrong?"
"No, no... just not used to the new house yet, I guess." she smiled.
" I guess it would be a lot to get used to." Yuka nodded and attended to her lunch.
Kagome smiled: guardian angels, ancient spells, late night ventures into the city with a hanyou, all-nighters with a deviant priest...
"You can say that again." she sighed.
~*~
The sky was turning pink and the late shrine goers were filling off with souvenirs and charms down the long steps to the streets below. It was peaceful and still as any temple should be in the calm recesses of dusk.
So of course Miroku was going crazy.
It was far too quiet and nothing he tried seemed to be able to put his mind at ease. It hung in the air and stirred the leaves high above with the wind.
Kagome was late. Anything could have happened and Sango might not have been able to handle it alone. She could have been kidnapped. She could have been killed by some unspeakably evil force. Perhaps worse, she could be spending time with some high school boy and ruining his mission of making her fall in love with an ornery, foul-mouthed, maladjusted demon.
But possibly the worst of it all, he was on kid duty.
"Hey Miroku, watch this!" Sota called from across the courtyard running with a soccer ball.
"That's great!" he feigned enthusiasm and looked out over the courtyard, leaning against his staff. It all was so quiet, one would never know the trauma this little shrine could inflict upon the soul. Especially with two seemingly eternally cursed beings that just seemed doomed to be together. Even during the day, Inuyasha himself was still and quiet.
Stone paths, stone walls, stone body: behind all of it was sleeping chaos just waiting to come to the surface. Miroku didn't trust the calm for one moment.
'Something isn't right…' He thought and let his eyes sweep over the courtyard. 'It's small, but I can sense another presence here. Perhaps the dark aura Shippo mentioned?'
'Yes!' It clicked in his mind and he sensed the aura of another being in the courtyard. It was small, obviously something hiding its true strength as he knew many high power demons could do, and close. Yes, it was very close.
He didn't look, already feeling out the location without the need of his eyes. Any unneeded motion might alert the threat that it had been discovered and ruin the opportunity to vanquish this unseen enemy.
He gripped the handle tightly and made one last mental sweep for the presence. Undoubtedly, it was right behind him and it was still masking its strength. It was coming closer, slowly, and cautiously, he could feel the tiny pulses of energy in the back of his consciousness. It was only three meters behind... Two…
"One." He muttered and pivoted on his ankles, swinging the staff around in a wide, fast arc, and bringing it down hard on the spot where he felt the power. It cracked the paving stone with the force and dust flew up at impact.
Miroku stood stone faced while the dust cleared… until he saw nothing was there.
"What?" he murmured confused. "I was so sure…"
"Mnph gmph wuimph!" a muffled voice called from the head of his staff.
He picked up the staff quickly to find the source of the noise, and to his great surprise, found a tiny little being, who would have been quite round and fat had he not been flattened against the pavement.
"What are you?" Miroku ground out and swiftly spun his staff around to bring the butt of it down onto the tiny being's stomach. "Tell me what you're doing here now!"
"Ooff!" the flea-looking thing coughed out. "Shippo… scout… warning!"
"What warning?" Miroku said. "You expect me just to believe some strange being lurking around here?"
"No time…" the flea said. "The boy… Inuyasha…"
"The boy?" Miroku repeated confused and glanced up. Sota was gone. He was alone in the courtyard with this flea, which was good, but he noticed immediately that garden door, which had been refastened, was now opened wide.
"Sota!" Miroku yelled and forgot about the smashed flea for the moment.
He rushed to the door in a flash and time suddenly stood still. The ball was flying through the air, directly at Inuyasha's head with enough speed and force that even though it was only an inflated ball, it could snap the thin stone of facial features or ears easily enough.
"NO!" he screamed and made a frantic dive in front of Inuyasha's statue. He hit ground on the hard paving stones and clutched the projectile safely against his chest.
"Sota," he ground out panting, "What were you doing?!" he looked up and tossed the soccer ball back away.
"I was just playing…" the kid stepped back and looked genuinely worried. "I didn't mean to kick it at the statue, I didn't even look up at it."
"You could have broken it." Miroku said, trying desperately to keep his voice calm. "Why would you do that?"
"I don't know, Miroku." He said shakily. "I didn't mean to, I'm sorry."
He sighed looking at the boy and forced himself to calm down. Of course the child wouldn't understand and he didn't want to hurt the boy by being angry. The child had become oddly attached to him in the past few days and was always hanging about underfoot.
It would have been endearing had it not been annoying.
"Just don't do that again, Sota." He said with a smile. "You shouldn't play in here."
The child nodded and looked at the statue curiously. "Miroku, what's the deal with this statue anyway? Kagome's always in here looking at it."
"Well," Miroku said, "It is very old. It's part of an ancient story of tragic love."
Sota made a face and huffed. "Oh is that all? I thought it would be something cool like a hunter going off and killing monsters in a war of good and evil, not some sissy love story."
Miroku laughed and lead Sota back towards the garden entrance. "Ahh, but there is no war as fierce as the one that plays in the human heart, my boy."
"Huh?"
"You'll find out soon." Miroku smiled, but despite his restored humor, there was a nagging question in his mind.
Where had that little flea thing gone?
~*~
Where had that girl gone?
Inuyasha walked tentatively around the garden sniffing the air for traces of the scent he most wanted to find in the world. Food.
His stomach growled in protest at its emptiness and he gave one in agreement. There was definitely no food or girl in the garden tonight, so he'd just have to go find one of them for himself.
Inuyasha leapt to the wall and gave a quick glance for anyone watching before springing high to the building's roof and running on his toes. He remembered where the girl's room had been before, the section of the house that had held the highest concentration of her scent, and could see the large tree that was just outside its window.
He slid down close to the trunk down into the branches until he could peer inside her window. No one was there. He moved forward swiftly and slid the glass open and slipped inside. The room definitely smelled strongly of the girl, but it was old, by several hours. She had been gone for a while.
Well, no girl, he'd have to go find the second and most important option for himself. Inuyasha strode quickly to the door across the room and pushed it open. He was about to step through when the door pushed back. Hard.
"Ouch!" he snarled and grabbed his bashed nose.
"You don't want to go down there." Miroku said sternly. "Her family is there, quite worried all ready, and definitely not aware of a demon living in their midst."
"So what do you expect me to do?" Inuyasha growled.
"Wait for Kagome."
"How long will that be?"
"I have no idea." Miroku shrugged. "But you aren't going to terrorize her family while she's gone."
"What's it matter to you, anyway?" the hanyou said.
"I care for the sanctity and peace deserved to all living beings." Miroku said grandly. 'And the fact that Kagome would kill you and I don't want to start this mess all over again!' he added silently.
"What crap!" Inuyasha huffed and walked forward. "I'm hungry and I'm not listening to your holy horseshit."
He grabbed the door's handle and twisted hard. Then tried again. Then started to shake the whole door in its hinges.
"I said no." Miroku said. "Wait for Kagome."
Inuyasha was about to start clawing at the wood when he decided that probably wasn't to help him much either if he couldn't even turn a knob. So he was stuck starving until that lazy little girl saw fit to grace the house with her presence. Why him?
"Where is that wench anyway?" he fumed and slid down to sit against the wall.
"That's what I'd like to know too." Miroku muttered and watched through the window for any sign of her return.
~*~
Kagome slowly blinked her eyes open and pulled her head up from her arms. It was night. The moon cast dim light over her through the window pane. She was still sitting in her desk in the detention room.
It was so still and peaceful and she'd had nice dreams again. She would have just closed her eyes and drifted back to sleep. But slowly, Kagome began to hear a muffled sort of sound, getting persistently louder and clearer.
"Higurashi… Higurashi, wake up. It's late. You should go home."
She gave a quick jump at the realization and looked around. Hojo took his had away and gave her a kind smile.
"Hojo!" she said surprised. "What are you still doing here?"
"I stayed late for my club meeting and noticed you in here when I was walking out." He smiled.
She shook her head at her own foolishness and started gathering her supplies and wondering just what time it was and how much of a lecture she would be getting from a worried mother.
"You must have been very tired." He observed. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine." She smiled embarrassed and closed her bag. "I'm not sick or anything, just not sleeping too well."
"I see." He nodded and held out a hand. Kagome looked up at him confused to what he was doing until he took the bag from her and lifted it on his shoulder. "Let me walk you home. You shouldn't be out alone this late."
"Um… sure." She said confused and got up to follow.
Unseen in the darkness, a third someone followed, muttering in a silent voice that Miroku wasn't going to like this.
~*~
"What is this?!" Sango looked up to see a very disgruntled Miroku staring down the shrine steps. Right past her and to the street below.
'Yep.' She thought. 'He's not happy.'
She sighed and looked down to where Hojo was standing with Kagome.
"What does that kid think he's doing?" Miroku seethed and pointed to the sandy haired boy.
Sango rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "He's her classmate. She had to stay late for detention and he offered to walk her home."
"And you let him?!" Miroku yelled and started walking down the stairs towards her.
"Of course!" Sango snarled up at him. "It's completely innocent. He's her friend and he was walking her home because he was concerned for her well being."
"I don't believe it." Miroku crossed his arms over his chest. "Never believe the nice guy routine! I should know..." He looked down at Hojo suspiciously. "We can't jeopardize this mission because some hormonal teenage boy gets a crush! That kid's a threat."
Sango looked over her shoulder where Hojo was waving amicably to Kagome, a vision of innocence and boy next door values. "Right..." she said and walked back up the stairs, waving Miroku off. Kagome soon followed and walked past without noticing him.
"Fine... fine... don't listen to me." Miroku sighed pitiably and walked back up the steps. "I've only been doing this for the last few millennia, what do I know?"
'Of course it hasn't worked out the last few millennia.' An unbidden thought made him frown.
"Can I help it if those two are hopeless?" He muttered.
'Actually... you can... that's the point.' The logical voice countered.
Miroku sighed and picked up the broom he'd abandoned when he'd seen that boy show up and threaten to ruin his five- hundred years of waiting.
Why did Sango have to be so attached to Kagome anyway? "Let the girl exorcize free will," "Let her be with people of her own century," "Don't push her towards a cranky demon boy who just so happened to be her predestined soul mate." Weren't people supposed to want to find their soul mates?
'When they're pleasant.' Miroku smiled despite himself.
Sango was attached, and as awkward as that might make their work, it was a truth. She was new to this work though, she hadn't yet learned that being attached would only make it harder when it all fell apart.
And it so often did.
Miroku had been attached once. He frowned as the memory sprang to life. The souls had been new to the world, only the first time to ever see the land of the living and had fallen in love.
They had been a simple couple: a strong lad with a fierce temper trying to make a livelihood from farming and his lovely young wife, quiet and demure and the only force in the world to make the man calm. They would have made a fine home and raised many strong and beautiful children, but their promised happiness was stolen away.
There had been a bandit in the area once that masqueraded as a priest... there had been a fire when the bandit needed a distraction to escape…
Miroku shuddered and ran his had over his eyes. 'I didn't know.' He thought. 'I thought it was an empty house. I just kept thinking it was an empty house.'
'I wanted to make it up to them so badly.' He thought, 'Even I had been caring and doting then. I did every thing right! I watched them so closely… never let any threat enter their paths, everything was perfect for them.'
He passed a hand over his eyes and took a deep breath. There was no use thinking on such things again. He'd done everything perfectly the first time, and the second, and many times after that. But as time went by, and it was more and more obvious that perfect just wasn't good enough, what else could he do?
He just stopped getting attached.
'Sango is attached though.' He thought, 'But this is just her first time as a guardian. She has time to learn. We both have nothing but time.'
He disappeared into the night to maintain his watch as he had done for so long, leaving no mark that he'd ever been there at all.
Next Chapter: Bargaining Power