Disclaimer: I don't own Harvest Moon, Karen, or any related characters or
events; to the best of my knowledge, they're all owned by Natsume. Any
resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or events is purely
coincidental. This story is based primarily on the plot of Harvest Moon 64.
Wine Red no Kokoro
by flame mage
Part 8: Other Fish in the Sea
**********
I felt almost totally better the next morning, so I came down for breakfast. Mom, her eyes still a little red around the edges, tried to smile and made me pancakes in the shape of Mickey Mouse to make me feel better. Kai was finishing his eggs, and the three of us split a tray of bacon. Mom didn't eat much.
"Where's Dad?" I asked.
Mom answered, "He's out in the grapevines, doing your chores."
"What?!" I yelped, then put my head in my hands and moaned, "Oh, damn...I'm gonna get yelled at, aren't I?"
"Am I not," Mom corrected. "And no, you're not. He's doing it so you can go to the Swimming Festival."
I smacked my forehead. "Is that today?!"
"Yep." Kai grinned, flexing. "And the champion swimmer's going to win it again this year."
I punched his arm. "Ugh. You are so arrogant."
He laughed. "I'm kidding. I haven't been working out, but you know my old home was by the ocean. I'm a pretty good swimmer."
He was. He was definitely better than Jeff, and Rick was so bad he didn't even bother entering, just stood on the shore holding the prize.
"Hey," he said, breaking me out of my thoughts. "You're entering the competition this year too, right?"
It took me a moment to register that one. Jack and Ann had made the mistake of talking about the swimming festival and Jack had asked if there was a race for the girls. Ann said no, we'd never had one, and when the city slicker started going on about injustice and sexism and lawyers, they'd stormed down to the Mayor's house and demanded that the women be allowed to have a race.
Well, it was early in the morning, and the Mayor really didn't want to deal with a hyperactive ranch girl and a farmer, especially since Jack still had his sickle out, so he said okay. So of course I said I'd enter.
"Oh, yeah, definitely!" I told Kai.
He pushed back his plate and asked, "Are you ready to go?"
"Sure." Mom took the dishes, despite our protests ("I can do them. You go have fun," she insisted), and the two of us changed and set out for the beach.
It was pretty crowded already when we got there. Kai went down with the other guys by the edge of the water, and I went off to sit in the Females and Losers section for the first race. Not that it bothered me. The crowd of guys down the beach was emitting clouds of Machoness strong enough to fell a cow twenty feet away.
Our crowd was a little less than enthusiastic. Most of us were just cheering randomly. Maria sat studying a crab and tracing pictures in the sand with her index figure, huddled with her knees close to her chest as if she wasn't used to wearing a swimsuit. Popuri cheered for everybody. Ann wasn't entirely sure whether she wanted to cheer for Gray or Cliff, so she was yelling, "Yay, yay, yay!" at random intervals. And I was totally torn between Kai, my best guy friend; Cliff, my cousin; and Jack, a new sort-of friend--not even mentioning my best friend's brother--so I was stuck yelling all their names and feeling like an idiot.
The only one who knew what she was doing was Elli, who was jumping up and down, shouting, "Goooo Jeff!" and then occasionally, "Yay Jack!" and blushing.
The rest of the audience was similarly subdued. Lillia was waving flags around, but everyone else was just sitting, watching, or ignoring the guys and talking to each other. Ellen, sitting in her rocking chair and knitting, made a sound suspiciously like a snore. In fact, the only people who were really loving this were May, Stu, and Kent, who were hopping up and down like maniacs.
This lack of energy was not present in the guys. They were flexing, stretching, running in place, bragging to each other, and just generally doing Manly things. You got the feeling that if you left them down there, they'd be drinking beer, eating cheese dip right out of the tub, and burping while they watched the playoffs. The fact that we don't get cable out there would not phaze a true guy.
We watched as the mayor explained the rules and Rick held up the Ugly Pig Statue--I think it's actually called the Invincible Katori, but all of us have at least two of them hidden in our closets somewhere. They're like fruitcakes. Everyone gives them and you can't get rid of them. The guys lined up, looking intensely at the buoy, the Drive to Win in their eyes.
"Get ready...set...GO!" the mayor hollered.
They were off like a shot. Kai, streamlining like a pro, instantly pulled into the lead. When the other guys were busy struggling in his wake, he let up a little, pacing himself. They were at the halfway point when Jack started coming on strong. Soon they were neck-and-neck, each struggling to pull ahead of the other. The crowd, for once, was going wild.
They reached the finish line together, but Kai got to his feet and slammed his hand on the buoy first. "WINNER!" shouted the mayor, and we all cheered.
Most of them doggy-paddled back to the beach, where they stood in a cluster, whining (Jeff: "I should get a head start! I'm so much older than all of you!") and trying to reinflate their egos. Kano got in and took a picture, and we all swarmed down to comfort the losers and congratulate Kai.
"You were awesome!" I told him, throwing my arms around him. "Are you sure you weren't working out behind my back?"
He laughed. "Maybe not enough. I can't believe Jack almost beat me. I had no idea he was so good."
"Can't beat the master, I guess," Jack grinned. "Just wait until next year, Kai."
"I guess I should watch my back," Kai told him. "Seriously, nice job out there."
"You too." Jack looked at me. "You ready for your race?"
I nodded. "Of course. I bet I can beat both your times."
"The scary thing is, I bet she can," Jack said to Kai. "Well, good luck out there. I'll be rooting for you."
"Me too!" Kai put in. "Good luck."
"Thanks. I'll do my best," I told them, and went down to the shore to stretch.
Ann was doing jumping jacks when I got there. "Hi--Karen--" she huffed. "Ready--to lose?"
"Yeah." I did a couple high kicks, stretching out my legs. Popuri seemed to be jumping up and down, whatever kind of warm-up that was. Elli was still standing with Jeff, whining about how she was at a disadvantage because she was heavier than we were, or something like that. Maria merely stood, waiting.
I figured I could beat Elli. I knew she didn't exercise at all, so she was not only a little bigger, but had less strength than I did from all those hours in the vineyard. It wasn't bad--the few extra pounds gave her a softer, gentler appearance, which she fit into well, and she did have a nice figure. But it wasn't good for a swimmer. Popuri was smaller, but she didn't work out either. And Maria was slender and average height, and I'd seen her at Moon Mountain climbing trees a lot, so I figured she was in pretty good shape, by my only real competition was Ann. Ann is an inch or so shorter than I am, but she's in excellent shape and she's very strong.
We lined up at the edge of the water, and I trained my ears on the mayor's voice.
"Ready...set...GO!"
I shoved off hard on the sand with my feet and plunged into the water. From the splashes next to me I could tell Popuri was flailing with her arms. I was taking fewer strokes, trying to use less energy to push more water. Elli had the same idea, but she and Popuri got left behind after a while.
Don't think about the others. Just swim. But it was impossible. Maria was crawling along beside me, doing pretty well, but a little past the halfway point she gasped and stopped for an instant. It was enough, and Ann and I surged ahead.
It was time to go all out. I put my face down in the water and started pushing myself as hard as I could, concentrating on making the strokes strong and clean. I didn't stop until I felt my hand drive into the buoy, and then I shot up, not even bothering to wipe the water out of my eyes, holding the buoy above my head so everyone could see it.
"WINNER!" the mayor shouted, and he was halfway through the word when Ann shot up behind me. "Ahh!" she spluttered. "Oh, well. It was fun anyway." Nothing gets Ann down for very long, even losing.
Maria was in a second after her, and then Elli and Popuri. We swam back to shore, Ann and I practicing our butterfly stroke.
"Congratulations, Karen!" shouted the mayor. Instantly, I was mobbed. There was Rick, telling me he'd ship me the prize later, Kai throwing his arms around me and then backing off shyly, Jack grinning, "I knew you could do it," and Ann jumping up and down and hugging me and Cliff pulling my hair and the works.
Kai and I walked home together, the victors.
"See?" he said suddenly. "You have such a great life. Why do you want to throw all this away?"
I looked at him. "What do you mean, I have a great life? I've got a father who screams, a mother who cries, and a dead vineyard!"
"You also have a lot of people who care about you."
I stopped dead. "What?"
"All those people. Cliff, Ann...they all like you."
"Lemme tell you something, Kai," I said. "They're the only ones. Everyone else in this dump thinks I'm a bitch."
"You're not," he said quietly.
I whirled on him. "Yes. Yes, I am! I want to be a bitch!"
He was clearly frightened, but he kept pressing. "Why?"
"Because if I'm a bitch, I won't care about anybody, and then I won't get hurt." I turned away and kept walking, faster.
"See, there was this guy once, way before you came. I was a little kid, and I fell in love with him." I clenched my fists. "But he left me.
"I wanted to follow him. I wanted to leave here!" I heard my voice break. "But I couldn't."
"What happened to him?" Kai asked.
"I don't know." My footsteps pounded into the ground, his beside them sounding lighter. "I don't remember his name or even his face, but my whole life I've wanted to find him. And that's one of the reasons I want to leave."
We walked the rest of the way in silence.
As we walked under the gate to the vineyard, Kai said, "Mis--Karen. I know I shouldn't say this, but..." He squared his shoulders. "I don't think you're a bitch, and I don't think you should let anyone else tell you that you are. None of this is your fault. And...I really think you're a nice person." I was just standing there, stunned. "I'll see you tomorrow." He went inside.
I stood in the center of the vineyard, the tiny colorless grapes withering in the dying light, and felt the tears running down my face.
Wine Red no Kokoro
by flame mage
Part 8: Other Fish in the Sea
**********
I felt almost totally better the next morning, so I came down for breakfast. Mom, her eyes still a little red around the edges, tried to smile and made me pancakes in the shape of Mickey Mouse to make me feel better. Kai was finishing his eggs, and the three of us split a tray of bacon. Mom didn't eat much.
"Where's Dad?" I asked.
Mom answered, "He's out in the grapevines, doing your chores."
"What?!" I yelped, then put my head in my hands and moaned, "Oh, damn...I'm gonna get yelled at, aren't I?"
"Am I not," Mom corrected. "And no, you're not. He's doing it so you can go to the Swimming Festival."
I smacked my forehead. "Is that today?!"
"Yep." Kai grinned, flexing. "And the champion swimmer's going to win it again this year."
I punched his arm. "Ugh. You are so arrogant."
He laughed. "I'm kidding. I haven't been working out, but you know my old home was by the ocean. I'm a pretty good swimmer."
He was. He was definitely better than Jeff, and Rick was so bad he didn't even bother entering, just stood on the shore holding the prize.
"Hey," he said, breaking me out of my thoughts. "You're entering the competition this year too, right?"
It took me a moment to register that one. Jack and Ann had made the mistake of talking about the swimming festival and Jack had asked if there was a race for the girls. Ann said no, we'd never had one, and when the city slicker started going on about injustice and sexism and lawyers, they'd stormed down to the Mayor's house and demanded that the women be allowed to have a race.
Well, it was early in the morning, and the Mayor really didn't want to deal with a hyperactive ranch girl and a farmer, especially since Jack still had his sickle out, so he said okay. So of course I said I'd enter.
"Oh, yeah, definitely!" I told Kai.
He pushed back his plate and asked, "Are you ready to go?"
"Sure." Mom took the dishes, despite our protests ("I can do them. You go have fun," she insisted), and the two of us changed and set out for the beach.
It was pretty crowded already when we got there. Kai went down with the other guys by the edge of the water, and I went off to sit in the Females and Losers section for the first race. Not that it bothered me. The crowd of guys down the beach was emitting clouds of Machoness strong enough to fell a cow twenty feet away.
Our crowd was a little less than enthusiastic. Most of us were just cheering randomly. Maria sat studying a crab and tracing pictures in the sand with her index figure, huddled with her knees close to her chest as if she wasn't used to wearing a swimsuit. Popuri cheered for everybody. Ann wasn't entirely sure whether she wanted to cheer for Gray or Cliff, so she was yelling, "Yay, yay, yay!" at random intervals. And I was totally torn between Kai, my best guy friend; Cliff, my cousin; and Jack, a new sort-of friend--not even mentioning my best friend's brother--so I was stuck yelling all their names and feeling like an idiot.
The only one who knew what she was doing was Elli, who was jumping up and down, shouting, "Goooo Jeff!" and then occasionally, "Yay Jack!" and blushing.
The rest of the audience was similarly subdued. Lillia was waving flags around, but everyone else was just sitting, watching, or ignoring the guys and talking to each other. Ellen, sitting in her rocking chair and knitting, made a sound suspiciously like a snore. In fact, the only people who were really loving this were May, Stu, and Kent, who were hopping up and down like maniacs.
This lack of energy was not present in the guys. They were flexing, stretching, running in place, bragging to each other, and just generally doing Manly things. You got the feeling that if you left them down there, they'd be drinking beer, eating cheese dip right out of the tub, and burping while they watched the playoffs. The fact that we don't get cable out there would not phaze a true guy.
We watched as the mayor explained the rules and Rick held up the Ugly Pig Statue--I think it's actually called the Invincible Katori, but all of us have at least two of them hidden in our closets somewhere. They're like fruitcakes. Everyone gives them and you can't get rid of them. The guys lined up, looking intensely at the buoy, the Drive to Win in their eyes.
"Get ready...set...GO!" the mayor hollered.
They were off like a shot. Kai, streamlining like a pro, instantly pulled into the lead. When the other guys were busy struggling in his wake, he let up a little, pacing himself. They were at the halfway point when Jack started coming on strong. Soon they were neck-and-neck, each struggling to pull ahead of the other. The crowd, for once, was going wild.
They reached the finish line together, but Kai got to his feet and slammed his hand on the buoy first. "WINNER!" shouted the mayor, and we all cheered.
Most of them doggy-paddled back to the beach, where they stood in a cluster, whining (Jeff: "I should get a head start! I'm so much older than all of you!") and trying to reinflate their egos. Kano got in and took a picture, and we all swarmed down to comfort the losers and congratulate Kai.
"You were awesome!" I told him, throwing my arms around him. "Are you sure you weren't working out behind my back?"
He laughed. "Maybe not enough. I can't believe Jack almost beat me. I had no idea he was so good."
"Can't beat the master, I guess," Jack grinned. "Just wait until next year, Kai."
"I guess I should watch my back," Kai told him. "Seriously, nice job out there."
"You too." Jack looked at me. "You ready for your race?"
I nodded. "Of course. I bet I can beat both your times."
"The scary thing is, I bet she can," Jack said to Kai. "Well, good luck out there. I'll be rooting for you."
"Me too!" Kai put in. "Good luck."
"Thanks. I'll do my best," I told them, and went down to the shore to stretch.
Ann was doing jumping jacks when I got there. "Hi--Karen--" she huffed. "Ready--to lose?"
"Yeah." I did a couple high kicks, stretching out my legs. Popuri seemed to be jumping up and down, whatever kind of warm-up that was. Elli was still standing with Jeff, whining about how she was at a disadvantage because she was heavier than we were, or something like that. Maria merely stood, waiting.
I figured I could beat Elli. I knew she didn't exercise at all, so she was not only a little bigger, but had less strength than I did from all those hours in the vineyard. It wasn't bad--the few extra pounds gave her a softer, gentler appearance, which she fit into well, and she did have a nice figure. But it wasn't good for a swimmer. Popuri was smaller, but she didn't work out either. And Maria was slender and average height, and I'd seen her at Moon Mountain climbing trees a lot, so I figured she was in pretty good shape, by my only real competition was Ann. Ann is an inch or so shorter than I am, but she's in excellent shape and she's very strong.
We lined up at the edge of the water, and I trained my ears on the mayor's voice.
"Ready...set...GO!"
I shoved off hard on the sand with my feet and plunged into the water. From the splashes next to me I could tell Popuri was flailing with her arms. I was taking fewer strokes, trying to use less energy to push more water. Elli had the same idea, but she and Popuri got left behind after a while.
Don't think about the others. Just swim. But it was impossible. Maria was crawling along beside me, doing pretty well, but a little past the halfway point she gasped and stopped for an instant. It was enough, and Ann and I surged ahead.
It was time to go all out. I put my face down in the water and started pushing myself as hard as I could, concentrating on making the strokes strong and clean. I didn't stop until I felt my hand drive into the buoy, and then I shot up, not even bothering to wipe the water out of my eyes, holding the buoy above my head so everyone could see it.
"WINNER!" the mayor shouted, and he was halfway through the word when Ann shot up behind me. "Ahh!" she spluttered. "Oh, well. It was fun anyway." Nothing gets Ann down for very long, even losing.
Maria was in a second after her, and then Elli and Popuri. We swam back to shore, Ann and I practicing our butterfly stroke.
"Congratulations, Karen!" shouted the mayor. Instantly, I was mobbed. There was Rick, telling me he'd ship me the prize later, Kai throwing his arms around me and then backing off shyly, Jack grinning, "I knew you could do it," and Ann jumping up and down and hugging me and Cliff pulling my hair and the works.
Kai and I walked home together, the victors.
"See?" he said suddenly. "You have such a great life. Why do you want to throw all this away?"
I looked at him. "What do you mean, I have a great life? I've got a father who screams, a mother who cries, and a dead vineyard!"
"You also have a lot of people who care about you."
I stopped dead. "What?"
"All those people. Cliff, Ann...they all like you."
"Lemme tell you something, Kai," I said. "They're the only ones. Everyone else in this dump thinks I'm a bitch."
"You're not," he said quietly.
I whirled on him. "Yes. Yes, I am! I want to be a bitch!"
He was clearly frightened, but he kept pressing. "Why?"
"Because if I'm a bitch, I won't care about anybody, and then I won't get hurt." I turned away and kept walking, faster.
"See, there was this guy once, way before you came. I was a little kid, and I fell in love with him." I clenched my fists. "But he left me.
"I wanted to follow him. I wanted to leave here!" I heard my voice break. "But I couldn't."
"What happened to him?" Kai asked.
"I don't know." My footsteps pounded into the ground, his beside them sounding lighter. "I don't remember his name or even his face, but my whole life I've wanted to find him. And that's one of the reasons I want to leave."
We walked the rest of the way in silence.
As we walked under the gate to the vineyard, Kai said, "Mis--Karen. I know I shouldn't say this, but..." He squared his shoulders. "I don't think you're a bitch, and I don't think you should let anyone else tell you that you are. None of this is your fault. And...I really think you're a nice person." I was just standing there, stunned. "I'll see you tomorrow." He went inside.
I stood in the center of the vineyard, the tiny colorless grapes withering in the dying light, and felt the tears running down my face.