In Terms of a Shadow

Part V

Author: profiler120

Email: profiler120@hotmail.com

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Sesshoumaru/Kagome

Summary: How dare he? He'd bought her, the jerk! Paid off her mother *knowing* she couldn't refuse the money and all he wanted in return was to marry her daughter. It sounded innocent - it wasn't. If that wasn't bad enough her betrothed was a beautiful, but heartless man who had no interest in her and regarded her, loosely, as his property.

Author's Note: Welcome to my fic. Although I shouldn't be welcoming you since this is chapter 5.

I sighed again. How was I supposed to deal with this child? Rin was a typical girl her age, or so I would guess. I knew little about children.

But Rin was a terror. The girl had done over the hall with Sesshoumaru's ink painting pictures over the murals on the doors.

That wasn't even the worst of it, and then she'd gotten a hold of a dagger and ripped through a trunk of clothing. Whose clothing it was I hadn't even figured out yet. Then she'd tossed rice at her companion in the dining hall. Only to subsequently get angry when scolded by Kouga and pronounce him to the entire court as 'a big fat head'.

I hung my head shamefully. What was I supposed to do with this girl?

"You need to punish her."

I looked up.

"She will never listen to you unless you set the rules and if you do not reel in the girl others will also doubt your authority. If you are going to be the Lady of the Western Lands, start acting like it."

"I don't know how to punish her. What do I do? Make her do chores or spank her?"

"Both," Kikyo replied readily. "Children need to know what is unacceptable. It's especially important here at Court for them to behave. Sesshoumaru will not want her running around like a wild child. It will ruin her chances for marriage, despite her good connections, if she grows up to do whatever she likes."

I nodded. Naturally Rin's chastity would be doubted then. Rin had to be disciplined but I wasn't going to like it. Me or Rin.

It was a cute scene, watching them, Kagome and Rin. So like mother and daughter they seemed and I wondered if my family could be as pleasant with her.

I could imagine her as she was now with Rin. Guiding, teaching our children. It was a pleasantly warm thought. I'd never given the matter much time before now.

I'd never spent any time contemplating how my family life would be; I'd never expected to have one. I'd simply figured I would marry; my wife would bear me a son, and then take care of that son without any help from me other than what was necessary.

It was the wifely duty to care for children - as Kagome was now doing. Only caring for a child wasn't quite what I'd imagined. It wasn't something to watch impassively.

It was something altogether different. Something encompassing - something that left you feeling warm and complete. Rin was not even my daughter and I felt altered merely by watching them together.

Perhaps I was longing for the family I had never had. I who had never been loved by a mother but tended to by servants and shuffled around between various caretakers as the years past.

Kagome smiled as she watched Rin up on the horse, the head groom was walking along guiding the gentle animal. It was perhaps the most sweetly tempered mare in the stable - a perfect choice for Rin.

I did not miss the fact Kagome shyly kept her distance from the animal and kept tossing it uneasy looks.

I wondered if she was afraid of them. I made a mental note to remember that. It would be nice to spend some time with her doing something pleasant.

Kagome wandered over to stand by the fence, her eyes peering around the stable yard as she looked away from Rin. There were few people around - and those who were, were all males. A fact that didn't escape me.

I kept my gaze sharp on her even more keenly when I noticed the young male at the corner fence post staring straight at her. He cast a friendly smile and I watched Kagome blush in response and look away.

I frowned.

That would not do.

I was about to go directly to her when I noticed the appearance of yet another person. A female.

Kikyo, I realized with sudden and perfect clarity.

The hostility between them was immediately apparent as both stiffened. To my surprise, however, Kikyo walked straight toward Kagome. I could only wonder what was going on from my vantage point.

"It does not look like punishment to me."

I blinked.

"I can't punish her all the time." I replied, crossing my arms. "Besides she looked so cute."

Kikyo frowned. "How do you intend to run the household? The servants will walk all over you."

I unsuccessfully tried to think of something to combat that, and couldn't. "I don't know how to deal with servants. I've never known any!"

Kikyo merely looked away as though unimpressed with the excuse.

"Ah... Kikyo?" The sharp gaze of my sister flickered toward me. "Sesshoumaru told me you were pregnant."

The intensity of her eyes only seemed to grow stronger. "So?"

I smiled. "I guess you must be very happy. I merely wanted to congratulate you. I ... I guess I'll be having a child of my own sooner or later. The idea makes me very nervous but you seem like you can handle anything."

Kikyo's expression seemed to dim. "You aren't really what I expected you to be."

I blinked. "What?"

"My mother never spoke kindly of you or your sibling. I did not know however what a black hearted woman my mother became until many years later."

"A black hearted woman?" I repeated, somewhat in awe.

"My mother was a miko when she was young - but she was heartbroken by our father's leaving her. He could not break his engagement to your mother, he was honor bound to marry her and no one knew of his affair with my mother. She, being the kind of woman she was then hid herself away to keep from damaging his reputation and soiling his vow to marry your mother, but that changed years later. She became a black miko and wandered."

"Wow..." I breathed. "But... why are you telling me? I mean, not that I'm unhappy or anything. It just seems odd you suddenly want to talk to me and all. My mother never said bad things about you. She didn't like to talk about it at all, she still doesn't. She always gets this sad look in her eye so I stopped mentioning it."

Silence fell between us, my question unanswered.

"I have no intention of falling the way of my mother. My opinion of you was wrong - and so I wished you to know I am rescinding it."

I wondered if that was as close to an apology as I was going to get for all the years of uneasiness between us. Instead of asking I smiled. "Don't worry about it. It's sad though - I don't imagine you were very happy when you were little. My mother always said to me 'never blacken your child's ears with bad talk of their relatives even if you despise them. It will only ever hurt them.'"

It was Kikyo this time who looked surprised. "Good words, I will remember that."

I nodded.

Kikyo headed off without another word and I merely watched, momentarily forgetting about Rin. Kikyo was icy - but beneath that exterior mask I believed and seemed to be right about her good heart. She must have had a hard childhood.

Although I didn't expect to win Kikyo over easily I determined I would. Kikyo and Sesshoumaru.

With a triumphant, happy smile I turned back to Rin. Things were going well.

Two short hours later I was all smiles in the garden. I'd learned from a passing kitchen staff there was an herb garden in the back. I'd headed out only to find the place in utter disarray.

Without a moment's thought to the matter I'd bent to my knees and began working the weeds out of the once grand beds.

I couldn't imagine how it had come to be in such a horrible condition, but everyone was so busy. I figured no harm could come to my assisting. I was, after all, head of the domestic household in a sense.

Rin had been sent away with an instructor and firm guidelines on her behavior. The next time she misbehaved she was going to be cleaning out the stables.

Granted, a girl of her size could not really do such a job, but the possibility had disgusted her thoroughly.

I yawned, sitting back to view my work. I'd barely gotten to the end of the row and my back was already aching. This was not going to be fun.

"What are you doing?"

His voice shouldn't surprise me, or his unusual timing, but it did.

"Um... weeding?" I asked, not liking the tone of his voice. This was going to be a scolding - I rolled my eyes.

The man was nearly intolerable.

"Why are you out here like some common kitchen servant? Did I not tell you, you were to be overseeing the household? I did not say you were to be manually handling it yourself."

I paused. He sounded more than a little unhappy. This was not just a little scolding. This was going to be a big scolding. It wasn't hard to tell the difference.

I turned to him and raised an eyebrow. "What difference does it make as long as it gets done?"

He scoffed. "You are my wife - you are not to be on your knees unless I put you there."

I frowned. "There's entirely too much talk around here about what *you* should be making *me* do. Why don't you back off and let me handle it the way I want to?"

"Because you're doing it wrong." He growled. "Obviously."

"Who are you to say what I'm doing right and wrong? It's still being done."

"Are you thick, woman? You are not a commoner anymore. Menial work is beneath you."

I blinked. "Is that what this is about? I'm too good for yard work?"

He didn't reply.

"Well I'm sorry that displeases you but I'm hardly going to sit around, drink tea, and bark out orders to others. I don't like that kind of thing."

"Well I suppose old habits are hard to break."

I tensed. "What's that supposed to mean?" She didn't wait for an answer. "Not that it matters, you stuffed kimono! I didn't want to marry you in the first place! Your lordship already knew I was a *commoner*!"

He sneered. "As though I had any other choice."

I huffed. "Some lord you are."

I swept past him angrily leaving him just as upset as I was.

Jerk. Ape. Unfathomable beast. I kicked irritably at a stone in my path only to catch my hem on the prickly bush and careen forward onto the path.

I impacted roughly, skidding my chin hard against the ground. It burned - and I knew already there would be a nasty mark.

Wonderful.

Just what I needed.

First to be ticked off by that arrogant cube I'd married and then to fall over.

Now I hurt. Everything from my chin to my knees ached and I discovered as I awkwardly stood my kimono was ripped.

I scowled and headed for the bathhouse. Maybe a bath could soothe me.

Maybe I'd sink below the water level and drown.

. . .

The bathhouse was not empty when I arrived. To my near astonishment I'd again run into Kikyo.

The castle it seemed had suddenly shrunk and everywhere I turned, Kikyo showed up.

I was not willing however to get involved in any kind of argument with Kikyo although our relationship seemed to be at an awkward turn.

I sank into the water with a heavy sigh. For several minutes neither of us said anything.

"You look unusually troubled."

"The man's an idiot, who wouldn't be troubled? A controlling, maniacal idiot."

I frowned at Kikyo's small, amused smile.

"Sesshoumaru I assume?"

I scowled. "Who else?"

"Problems, then?"

I grumbled. "You're lucky. You seem very happy with Inuyasha." I tilted my head back sinking further into the steaming water. "I'm stuck with that lousy ice-cube and his impish sister."

Kikyo eyed me carefully.

"You'll get used to it."

I merely sighed, eyes closing blocking out sight of the ceiling overhead.

"But you got to marry who you wanted. My family shipped me out at the first opportunity." She paused. "How did you get here?"

Kikyo languished a moment before replying. "I was sent to serve as the castle miko for a time."

I sat up. "Then you met Inuyasha? That's so sweet!"

"Inuyasha isn't..." she trailed off momentarily. "Inuyasha isn't so pleasant on first acquaintance."

I nodded. "Love takes time, but at least you've got it. I don't have anything. How am I even supposed to...?" I trailed off pausing, blushing slightly.

"Perform your wifely duties?" Kikyo finished. "Is he that bad?"

I blushed. "Sesshoumaru is... He's not... "

"I've heard many things about Sesshoumaru. He's had one or two steady mistresses before you. I believe both women were very satisfied and said he was not a selfish lover. If he doesn't force you or hurt you, it shouldn't be that difficult."

"Theoretically." I glanced off to the side. "He's still a sour guy."

I missed Kikyo's small smile. "You'll get used to it." She replied.

I just sighed dramatically and turned back with a brilliant smile. "Anyway, I think it's great you're having a baby. I know we aren't the best of friends or anything, but if there's anything I can do to help just ask. What's it like? Being pregnant?"

Kikyo shrugged in a non-committal fashion. "It's hard to describe."

"How's Inuyasha? The last I saw he was slumped over a table with that dark haired guy, Miroku I think, patting is shoulder trying to wake him up."

"Inuyasha is adjusting slowly."

I smiled.

"Kagome-sama! Are you here?"

Both of us turned to see a girl poke her head in the door. "Here, Sango-chan," I replied wearily.

Sango smiled sympathetically. "Rin is calling for you."

I sighed, tossing again in my bed. I was alone tonight. Who knew where Sesshoumaru was. Probably in someone else's bed I thought resentfully. I stood angrily throwing on a yukata not bothering with anything fancy. Stupid jerk, he had no consideration for me whatsoever. I all but stomped downstairs heading toward the garden. Just about everyone was sleeping now which only led me to further suspect my husband to be in another's bed. I was in his after all, and he wasn't there.

I threw the door open and breathed in the chilly air with a sigh. Maybe the cold would do me some good, I thought dismally. I pulled my arms around myself tucking the material tight. I was just winding around the corner into the actual garden when out stepped a man from the shadows, startling me.

I jumped in fright, holding a hand to my chest as I panted.

"My apologizes, Kagome-sama. I did not mean to frighten you."

"Who are you?" I asked, waiting for my heart to calm.

"My name is Naraku. I am a mere servant here at the castle of your husband."

"Oh," I immediately deflated at the mention of my spouse.

He fell into step with me but his presence made me uneasy. I couldn't see him well only that he was taller than me and he had long, wavy dark hair. His eyes seemed to glint in the dimness.

I gave up the notion of walking in the garden and headed back but he seemed to hardly notice, following along.

"You look unhappy Kagome-sama. I could help. I am of means to provide you an escape from this dismal world. I know the previous Lady of the Western Lands escaped her husband and is very happy today."

I frowned but didn't reply.

"You needn't worry about him finding you. I guarantee your safe passage and concealment."

"I don't think leaving will solve anything." I replied hoping he wouldn't press. I didn't want strangers butting into my relationship. How dare he? I silently fumed.

"Think about it."

His voice was a seductive caress and he left me there alone in the doorway. I thought momentarily about going back out but thought better of it. I was just about to head in when a hand pressed down on my shoulder and then another across my mouth.

I was yanked out the door and pressed against an exterior wall of the building. I abandoned my scream when I met the gold eyes of my husband.

"Where have you been?" I snapped, having already forgotten about Naraku.

"What were you doing with him?"

"Who?" I asked dumbly.

He growled in anger and snapped my wrist up in his grip pulling me in the doorway. I whimpered and he only clamped down harder. He dragged me to our chambers, threw open the door and tossed me inside. He snapped the door closed and left.

I could barely stem off the growl. How dare she? Naraku? Naraku?! Of all people to be unfaithful with? That leech?

I immediately ordered the location and confiscation of the hated man. He would not leave here without punishment. Naraku would be lucky if he left here with his head.

I would not allow another to touch Kagome. Anger boiled in my veins and I headed down to the dojo to train.

If I didn't I'd end up going upstairs to my wife and punishing her. Although my body was demanding it, I knew forcibly bedding my wife would ultimately be damaging. I had already established my claim on her.

Yet my mind would not be rid of the image of them walking together. Naraku trailing at her side so closely whispering lowly. So like lovers they looked sharing a secret meeting. I watched Naraku split off from her after whispering some parting endearment. Kagome remained at the doorway and then looked about to follow him.

Had they been intimate in the garden? Was she following him for that purpose? Was I reading it all wrong?

Logic whispered for me to take it slow and wade through the facts but my body ached. I ached for her. I was angry and slighted. How dare she let another touch her? If one of us were to be unfaithful it was not to be her.

Damn it! What was all this talk of trust if she could not be trusted to be faithful to me? How could I expect her to bear me an heir and never know if it was actually mine?!

I growled lowly.

Not only had she insulted me - but now she sought out another. It did nothing for my anger remembering her maidenly blush when smiled at by the young man at the stable yard. I fumed in silence snapping a sword from the wall.

I could see my idealistic image of my family shimmering as it faded. Of course, how could I have ever expected it could work? Women in my experience were flighty and unstable. Kagome was bound to be the same, but that wouldn't matter.

I would make her be the woman I wanted. I would make her stay. She wasn't going. She wasn't going to go anywhere, not as long as I breathed.

No.

I grinned lowering my sword to the floor in silent, vengeful triumph. Not at all - I now knew exactly what to do with my darling wife.

The door slid open again just before dawn. Light was just beginning to stream through the open window into my room. Or his room. Was it *our* room? I didn't know.

I was awake, unable to sleep. My eyes were tired and heavy. My body ached dreadfully but sleep eluded me.

I couldn't think, let alone sleep. My mind was racing. What would I say?

Would he even listen to reason? He'd seemed so upset. It hadn't helped we'd argued just earlier - who knew what he was thinking now.

I wasn't looking forward to the coming storm. The one I was presently on the brink of.

He loomed like a thundercloud in the room, not pacing, not moving. He barely looked to be breathing.

"Well?" He growled.

His temper had hardly seemed to cool. Rather, he stared down at me with eyes glinting with a well controlled anger.

Though I wondered just how well controlled he was beyond that exterior. Everyone had limits, surely Sesshoumaru had them too.

"It's not what you think." I began eyes darting nervously from him to the door as though I were contemplating leaving. Not that it was such a bad idea, especially given how violent he'd suddenly turned. My wrist was still throbbing from where he'd grabbed me.

"Then explain it to me," he growled. His cold, gold eyes watched me impassively.

"I met Naraku a couple of hours ago. I couldn't sleep, and I don't know where *you* were... So I went downstairs and ended up strolling through the garden. I was hoping it would make me sleepy. As I was passing under one of the arches he came out from around a corner, scared me nearly to death."

I paused to sigh.

"He seemed nice enough but I didn't want to be outside with him in the dark so I started walking back toward the door."

"That's it?"

I frowned. "We talked, I left. That was it."

"Talked about what?"

"He said he could spirit me away from the castle in the middle of the night to a place you'd never find me. I said it wasn't such a good idea, he told me to think about it. I left. I certainly never expected to see him again because I had no plans of ever going near the garden again once the sun was down."

He seemed to snort in derision. "I thought I had made this point before but let me repeat it for you. Obviously that is necessary. You belong to me. If you ever try to escape me - once I catch you - I'll make you miserable for the rest of your life."

"Well clearly you aren't listening either because I already said, I wasn't going anywhere!"

"I know you aren't. From this point forward you are forbidden from leaving my side."

I paled. "What?! You can't do that! It's completely unfair!"

He turned away. "When you aren't with me, you'll be here. Alone. Until you adjust to your new place in the household here is where you stay."

I stood intending to protest but he was out the door and I heard Sesshoumaru beckon for a guard. I stood, listening in absolute horror as a man took up watch at my door.

I slid to the floor lifelessly.

Why?

Why had this happened? Why to me?

My eyes warmed with tears and spilled over. I crawled back to my bed and cried.

Author's Note2: I have good news and bad news.

Good news: There's only 2 chapters left. (Or wait, is that bad news?)

Bad news: I haven't started writing either. ^_^

Hey! I did something totally new with this fic. I outlined the entire thing. It's completely planned from start to finish. So when I say 2 chapters, it's actually 2 chapters. So, when it ends with chapter 7 - let me know how it was, okay? Just overall. Thanks in advance.

Please note any errors you see in a review. Although I've proofed this twice I could've missed them easily. ^_^

Oh - before I forget. I'll update "Prisoner, My Prisoner" next weekend. (Hopefully. I've completed 13.)