Guess who's back? Yes, it's the Hiei/ Kurama lover inside of me. I just couldn't subdue that little voice that said, make another H/K....make another H/K! So...I made another! But...then again, it's not that YAOI-ish, which is a shame. Same with my other fics, mild shounen-ai.
Summary: A distant voice inside of Kurama is urging him to ditch his human life and return to the makai for good. Not knowing how to respond to this, Kurama searches for answers from the main reasons he's still in the ningenkai to begin with. Can this convince him to stay? (Gotta read and find out! )
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.
- The Serum -
Hiei spotted Kurama resting dolefully on the park bench where he often sat. The fox wore a concentrated look on his face. Hiei knew something was up with Kurama. There had to be. He'd been acting down the past few weeks, and though Hiei wasn't the best at showing and perceiving emotions, it was obvious Kurama was going through some things.
Hiei relaxed himself a little, having gotten a little tense when he first noticed Kurama. He cleared his throat, shoved his hands into his pockets and waited a moment before he walked over to the bench. The park was unusually empty at that time. That was just fine with Hiei. He wasn't fond of the stares he got when the park was teething with humans.
Kurama's expression changed dramatically when he saw Hiei approach. He gave the demon a smile, and Hiei lifted his head in response. He walked around the back of the bench towards where Kurama sat, and stopped on the other side of the arm of the bench. Kurama turned a little on the bench to see him better.
"What brings you by?" he asked. Hiei's expression remained neutral as he looked off to the side.
"Thought you were in the makai. Went and looked for you when I saw that you'd come back." Kurama was apparently looking for more to that answer, but seeing that the demon revealed all that he would without prompting, Kurama continued the conversation himself.
"Yeah," he said with a nod. "I only needed to visit, that was all."
"Visit who?" Hiei asked.
"Oh...I didn't visit anyone. I went home." This seemed to spark Hiei's interest. His eyes returned to Kurama's.
"Thinking about going back?" Hiei asked. Kurama looked down. He had been actually, but was in denial about the fact. He told Hiei the same thing he'd been telling himself.
"No...not lately."
"But you just..."
"I needed to pick something up." Hiei nodded.
"Oh." His face tightened a bit as he took in a breath, a warm breeze wafting by. He sighed.
"So what's been going on with you lately?" he asked. Kurama turned to face Hiei, appreciating one of the rare moments when Hiei actually wanted to talk to him. He pulled his legs up to his chest and held them in his arms, his feet on the bench.
"I didn't know the change was so obvious," he said. "Shiori noticed something was wrong, but she's my mother. She's always the first to know anything about me."
"So what is it?" Kurama took in a deep breath.
"If you had the key to your future in the palm of your hand, but it meant risking all that you hold dear, would you unlock the path to the rest of your life, or would you throw the key away?" Hiei was slightly confused by the question, but hid that fact from Kurama.
"Depends. What's this key you speak of?"
"It's a serum...and using it could mean returning to my previous form, but....but also, losing hundreds of years off of my life."
"That's what you'd be losing that you hold dear?" Hiei asked. Kurama shook his head, looking away. "Then what is?" Across the field, a young couple and their child were playing catch with a small ball. Kurama smiled, but then the gesture faded. His eyes fell to the ground.
"This life." Hiei's eyebrows raised in surprise.
"That's a pretty big gamble," he said. "I know you like it here."
"I never should have mixed it," Kurama said. "I never should have even thought about it."
"Why did you?"
"Curiosity. I wanted to see if I could still do it. I tested myself with several different serums and potions...and they each have worked. I have no doubt that this one, too, will work. That makes me want to try it, but trying it would mean risking everything if my serum is a failure." Hiei took a step closer.
"Try it later," Hiei said. "When you get older and your human body's dying on you."
"I can't," Kurama said. "I have to take it now. If I wait, it'll be too late. It won't have any effect."
"How does it work?" Hiei asked. Kurama looked back up at him.
"It's weird. Everything has to be right, or it won't work at all. I need to be young and vital, and in good health, first and foremost. Second, I need to be old and experienced, some part of me needs to be. I have to heat it to the right temperature and take several doses at different intervals of time. After that, I need to be able to sleep where I want to awaken for at least the number of doses in hours. It will have taken effect by then."
"If it works, what will happen?" Hiei asked. "You'll just be Youko forever?"
"Not forever. Each dose of the serum and each hour of rest works to reduce one hundred years."
"How many do you have?"
"Seven," Kurama said. "That would take me back to...when I was...still...innocent..." Kurama shook his head. "If I take each dose, and each dose holds, after I sleep, I will wake up as Youko Kurama. If everything has gone right, I will be able to use this form as well, because this form would be the life source of Youko's restoration. This is why I need to be Shuuichi for it to work." Hiei nodded.
"But the consequences...?" he began.
"I could lose this body, for good. It'll just....waste away during the hibernation stage. If it does, when my soul wakes up, I'll of course be Youko, but I will have aged however many doses I took."
"Wouldn't you...be...?"
"Dead by the time I'm nearly 2000 years old?" Kurama finished up for him. He sighed. "Not quite. I'd be a vegetable, as ningens put it. A frail, fragile, weak, old wrinkled thing. I've seen them before, the elders. They were protected by the tribe that raised me and highly valued for their skills. One elder, who's origins are still unknown...she lived to be 2387. I remember her vividly....she was quite hard to forget."
"Why so old? Why don't you guys just die?"
"We're not programmed to. Over the hundreds of thousands of years we've existed, we've evolved into machines that are driven until the very last cells of our being has exhausted." Hiei looked as if he was getting interested in this. Kurama pursed his lips in thought.
"So if you'll live so long, why try to go back in time?"
"Oh...don't misunderstand... It's not time travel. It's just a rejuvenation of sorts. I won't relive what I've gone through in the past. I'll just keep living this life, but I won't age as harshly." Kurama's face went dry for a moment. "You should have seen her, Hiei. Her entire face had caved in and her limbs were so limp." Kurama shivered. "We all staked our lives on the fact that one day, we'll die before it comes to that."
"Well...don't do it then," Hiei said. "You might as well live out this life and then die, and then live as Youko and then die."
"The prospect of death isn't one I'd like to face so readily, Hiei. At least not anymore."
"Oh, I get it. You're always talking about how your life's all weird and things. Like you want to change it, but you feel it's too late."
"The blood of thieves and manics run through my veins, Hiei, for so long. And then...she gave me the blood of an innocent. Of herself, and of my father. You'd never meet more innocent, sweet people. I never felt such blood, such life before. I resented them for it, but I know better now. I know when I've truly been blessed. That is why I cannot take that serum. It would be a betrayal to everything I've gained as Shuuichi. A downright betrayal. But I crave that serum, so selfishly."
"Give it to me," Hiei said. Kurama looked up at him.
"What?" he asked. Hiei held out his hand.
"Give me the stuff. I won't let you have it; I'll destroy it if I have to." Kurama pursed his lips again.
"I...don't necessarily have it on me," he admitted. "I snuck it in the dirt of one of my plants."
"You will give that stuff to me and tell me how to dispose of it. No need keeping it around if it'll hurt you." Kurama looked away again, noticing that the family had already left.
"Thank you."
"I haven't even done it yet," Hiei said. "You're getting so soft. That one of the things you'll miss?"
"Of course," Kurama said. "It's like second nature now, and I'm damn proud of it."
"Does it piss you off that people can still see that you're Youko and don't wanna get to know the other stuff?"
"The way you were when you tracked me down?" Hiei gave Kurama a quizzical look.
"I've learned my lesson," he said, coming around and sitting on the opposite side of the bench. "I'm in league of my own now." Kurama turned around and sat correctly on the bench, crossing his legs as he looked over at Hiei.
"I do resent people for it, but I can't blame them. All the sayings are true...once a thief always a thief, there's no honor among thieves. And the fear they feel when they realize that I'm not just any youko..." Kurama lowered his head, shaking it slightly. "I love myself, I do. I'm not ashamed of any one of my forms. It's just that...experience is a powerful thing, and this experience is the greatest I've ever encountered."
"Why?" Hiei asked. "Why the human one?"
"Simply because it's so different and fresh and....Hiei...you don't know how grateful I am to know you, and Yusuke and Kuwabara-kun. Keiko-chan and Botan...my mother...oh, how I love that woman..."
"Softie," Hiei snickered. Kurama gave him a playful frown.
"Speaking of softies," he said. "I know it doesn't take much for you to get all lovey in the eyes when Yukina's around." Hiei turned to him sharply.
"What?" he almost growled. Kurama nodded, looking like he held the secret that could ruin Hiei's life. He laughed. Hiei scowled. "I do not!" he said. Kurama smirked.
"Oh, you do, too, and you know it. You're getting soft, just like me. Believe me, it's possible. Friends and relatives will do that to a person."
"But you're still a demon at heart, Kurama..."
"And I'll never, ever forget that. I'll never turn my back on my heritage, but nothing will stop me from having the best second chance I could have ever wished for." Hiei folded his arms and looked away.
"You'll learn," he said. "This isn't so great." Kurama leaned over and gave Hiei a shove.
"Shut up," he told him and stood up. Kurama stretched very widely. "You coming to get the serum?" he asked.
"Yeah." He came from the bench and they began to walk towards the entrance gates of the park.
"You hungry? We could make a date out of it." Hiei's face scrunched up almost immediately, but then he loosened up. He smirked, closing his eyes and stuffing his hands into his pockets again.
"Dream on, Kurama," he said. "Hiei doesn't date..."
"Did you just refer to yourself in the third person?" Kurama asked, matching the demon's smirk.
"Don't see any other Hiei's around," Hiei said, his tone amused. Kurama shook his head at him, and looked around at all the scenery and life around him.
Yes, he was truly happy here, even if it was temporary, and had no intention of cutting his time short because of some selfish desire that Youko tried to suddenly impose. He would stay here for as long as he could and live the life he was destined to live at this stage in the game.
His gaze fell on Hiei, and he watched the demon as he walked. Hiei seemed oblivious to his staring, scowling at the little children that pointed at him as he walked by. Oddly, the children seemed to get a kick out of him and laughed and giggled happily as their parent's scolded them. Kurama smiled, slowing down a little. He couldn't ask for a better companion.
"Hiei?"
"Huh?"
"Thanks." Hiei gave Kurama a silent glance, one that Kurama was sure to study hard. Within it, though there was nothing obvious about it and it could have easily been overlooked, Kurama saw his 'you're welcome.'
I know what you're thinking: 'That reads like a one shot.' That's because it was until I realized what I could make it. Of course, if I don't get any reviews, that'll be what it will remain. :(
Oh...and all that stuff about Youko's past and the serum and the aging...I made it up. I know almost zero about Youko's past. I now see the beauty of the 'fiction' in fan fiction. I could make stuff up 'til the cows come home. Unless you want to correct me. Then I'll change it. Please review!
J3
(This is a shout-out to all who reviewed my previous story, A Daunting Vacation. I forgot to put this at the end of that one...whoops! Anyhoo, thanks a million and I appreciate it and if I ever win the lottery, I promise I'll share. Even if it's just a dollah!!)