I Don't Deserve All This
It all began last November. Everything in life was going great for me, or so I thought. I had it all. Good grades, perfect looks, wonderful family, and a loving boyfriend.
His name was Sirius Black, the biggest player in all of Hogwarts. He had that whole 'date a girl for a week, sleep with her, then dump her' thing going on. And I was foolish enough to think I could change him.
I remember the day like it was yesterday. All the 6th year Gryffindors had decided to throw a little party after the Thanksgiving feast. Sirius and his best friend James Potter sneaked in some firewhiskey.
Sirius and I had both had a little too much to drink. He led me up to his dorm and lets just say things got a little out of hand.
Six days after I had lost my virginity, Sirius dumped me for someone else. Other than my broken heart, everything was normal. Until about a month and a half later. I was late.
I immediately owled my elder sister, who had graduated from Hogwarts two years earlier, asking for a pregnancy test.
The next day, I spend my Potions lesson in the bathroom, crying. I was pregnant.
I immediately knew I had to keep it. Something inside of me told me the sacrifice would be worth it. It would be tough, but hey, I was a tough girl.
When I told Dumbledore about my predicament, he assured me that I would be able to finish my education. I would be privately tutored when the time came.
Dumbledore strongly advised me to tell Sirius, but I decided not to. Absolutely no one would know. I was on my own.
Looking back, I don't know how I did it, but somehow I did. I finished my exams early and did extremely well. Dumbledore allowed me to leave in May because it was getting hard to hide it from the students. He made up an excuse about having to go see my ill grandmother.
As for my friends, after I knew I was pregnant, I became very distant and started spending all my time alone. They didn't know what was wrong, but nonetheless, our friendships ended.
My parents were disappointed in me, but offered to help me through it. I was extremely grateful for this. On August 11, Braden Gibbons was born and thankfully he was healthy. He was my son. Oh how I loved the sound of those words, my son. In the back of my mind, a little voice kept saying 'He's Sirius' son too', but I ignored it.
I only had a month before I had to go back to Hogwarts. During that time, I stayed at home to take care of Braden. When I received my Hogwarts letter, I was surprised to hear that Dumbledore had chosen me as Head Girl. He explained that this would prove to be very convenient because I would be provided with a private dormitory.
My sister let me borrow some money to purchase a crib and clothes for Braden, who would be living in my dorm. Dumbledore had also assigned me a personal house-elf who would baby-sit Braden while I attended classes.
Looking back on it all, I really felt like I didn't deserve it all. But I am still extremely grateful for everything Dumbledore did for me. Without his help, I don't think I would have made it this far.
It all began last November. Everything in life was going great for me, or so I thought. I had it all. Good grades, perfect looks, wonderful family, and a loving boyfriend.
His name was Sirius Black, the biggest player in all of Hogwarts. He had that whole 'date a girl for a week, sleep with her, then dump her' thing going on. And I was foolish enough to think I could change him.
I remember the day like it was yesterday. All the 6th year Gryffindors had decided to throw a little party after the Thanksgiving feast. Sirius and his best friend James Potter sneaked in some firewhiskey.
Sirius and I had both had a little too much to drink. He led me up to his dorm and lets just say things got a little out of hand.
Six days after I had lost my virginity, Sirius dumped me for someone else. Other than my broken heart, everything was normal. Until about a month and a half later. I was late.
I immediately owled my elder sister, who had graduated from Hogwarts two years earlier, asking for a pregnancy test.
The next day, I spend my Potions lesson in the bathroom, crying. I was pregnant.
I immediately knew I had to keep it. Something inside of me told me the sacrifice would be worth it. It would be tough, but hey, I was a tough girl.
When I told Dumbledore about my predicament, he assured me that I would be able to finish my education. I would be privately tutored when the time came.
Dumbledore strongly advised me to tell Sirius, but I decided not to. Absolutely no one would know. I was on my own.
Looking back, I don't know how I did it, but somehow I did. I finished my exams early and did extremely well. Dumbledore allowed me to leave in May because it was getting hard to hide it from the students. He made up an excuse about having to go see my ill grandmother.
As for my friends, after I knew I was pregnant, I became very distant and started spending all my time alone. They didn't know what was wrong, but nonetheless, our friendships ended.
My parents were disappointed in me, but offered to help me through it. I was extremely grateful for this. On August 11, Braden Gibbons was born and thankfully he was healthy. He was my son. Oh how I loved the sound of those words, my son. In the back of my mind, a little voice kept saying 'He's Sirius' son too', but I ignored it.
I only had a month before I had to go back to Hogwarts. During that time, I stayed at home to take care of Braden. When I received my Hogwarts letter, I was surprised to hear that Dumbledore had chosen me as Head Girl. He explained that this would prove to be very convenient because I would be provided with a private dormitory.
My sister let me borrow some money to purchase a crib and clothes for Braden, who would be living in my dorm. Dumbledore had also assigned me a personal house-elf who would baby-sit Braden while I attended classes.
Looking back on it all, I really felt like I didn't deserve it all. But I am still extremely grateful for everything Dumbledore did for me. Without his help, I don't think I would have made it this far.