Two Sith Lords and an Elf

By Darth Warious

Disclaimer: I don't own 4-H, Star Wars, LotR, or any of their characters. I do own the characters, Darth Warious, Commander Rogue Dragon, Lillian and Pegasus.

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Four years ago, a young Sith Lady by the name of Darth Warious crash landed on earth. Her master Emperor Palpatine sent her away as the construction of the second Death Star was just beginning. Why he sent her away was uncertain, she had not displeased him in her performance as a Sith apprentice, nor had she ever failed him. The Sith Lady landed in the forests of North America, in the region of New England, United States of America. There she found an abandoned house and car in working condition. Her master had indeed made things prepared for her arrival. Upon entering the house she saw a holo-terminal set up already. There was a message on it for her. Pressing the activate button a holographic image of her master sprung up and began to speak.

"Darth Warious, my faithful apprentice," he began. "You are here because the force willed it to be so. The Jedi will rise again soon, although I tell Vader differently, I will tell you what I have truly foreseen.
"I have foreseen the rise of the Jedi, and your destruction if I did not do something. I will die soon and you will be the only one left. I foresaw that if you came to this planet, far from the rest of the Galaxy in the unknown regions, that you would be safe and grow to become a master of the Sith. I have foreseen something strange as well. You will be joined by my first apprentice Darth Maul, but he is dead. I do not know if it is possible, but I will tell you all I have foreseen, no matter how strange. I have also foreseen you making friends on this planet and living among this strange people. I have foreseen you falling in love with a humanoid of a kind I have never seen before. You will also meet your true father, after five years have gone by.
"I have made an identity for you on this planet. You are to use the transport in front of your house when you are sixteen. Your license to drive it will be in the car, but you must not drive it until you are sixteen. You are part of a club called 4-H and I have arranged for someone to drive you to the various meetings that happen during it. You will also be starting a job at the library. You will also have transportation there. You have enough of this planets currency to last you ten years without working. But I warn you, do not waste it. You will continue to practice all I have taught you and one day a master of the Ancient Sith will come and test you when the time has come for you to become a master. You are charged with restoring the ancient way of the Sith. You know about their ways already, you must bring them to the present once again. The forbidden things of the Sith are no longer off limits to you. Practice them, use them, master them, you will have need of the old ways to survive this planet.
"My time will come soon. Obey me and all will go well with you." The message cut off leaving Darth Warious alone.

Warious met three girls around the age of 13 who became her friends. The one she met at 4-H was called Commander Rogue Dragon. The other two she met at a thing called youth group. They were Lillian and Pegasus. These three became good friends and they hung out together often during the summer.

Three months after Warious landed on Earth while she was meditating; there was a great disturbance in the force. Darth Warious felt the death of her master, but at the same time there was a disturbance in the force right next to her. Darth Maul appeared and somehow, the two knew not to fight each other. So Darth Maul came to live with Darth Warious.

When her friends found out Warious had to explain to them who and what she really was. They were excited at the fact the force existed and accepted her for who she was almost immediately.

One year after Warious came to Earth, another joined their company. Warlord Zsinj crash landed near by and lived with Warious and Maul.

A year after that, yet another person joined their company, Haldir of Lothlórien who soon learned how to exist in a modern world and also found a way to annoy Darth Warious, a feat unheard of until he came.

This story picks up two and a half years later at an 4-H meeting...

It was another boring 4-H science team meeting. Darth Warious and her best friend, Commander Rogue Dragon was there, along with her Sith brother Darth Maul, and elven keeper Haldir.

Darth Warious had brought a pad of paper she had originally intended for drawing, but instead was used for the following conversation.

Darth W: I am bored.

Darth M: So?

W: You're no help 'brother'.

M: You dragged me to this for what reason again?

W: You're more fun to talk with if I turn evil. Elf boy here doesn't seem to appreciate our ways.

CRD: What are you two talking about?

W: Nothing Commander, we're bored.

H: You should be paying attention.

W & CRD: Shut up!

Commander doesn't like elves. In fact she hated Haldir just a bit more then Legolas just because he was here. Warious just liked trying to annoy them. But Haldir seemed to be immune to her ways.

CRD: Can I join in?

W: You already have joined...Welcome to the Nightmare!

M: Calm down Warious, the meeting only just started.

W: Oh fine. Hey Maul, since we're the only people that can really see you, will you show off some of your saber skills for Commander.

Maul rolled his eyes and moved to the other end of the room to show off.

CRD: Cool!

W: Yeah Darth Maul is the best!

CRD: Better than the elf?

W: Yes. Way better.

H: What?!? No he is not!

CRD: Kyp Durron could beat Darth Maul.

W: No way. Vader could beat Durron, Dooku beat Vader, and Darth Maul could have beat Dooku. Both Maul and the 'elf' have beaten me.

This resulted in a long argument over who could beat who.

H: And I could beat Maul if I wanted to.

W: Yeah, if you could work a lightsaber. Ha ha ha.

(Elves can't seem to handle lightsabers.)

M: Since you two are busy talking to each other I'm going to stop "demonstrating my saber skills".

W: Whatever. listens briefly to the meeting going on off paper

M: Heads up! Warlord Zsinj is here.

CRD: Why is he here?

W: I have no idea. to Zsinj Hey! What are you doing here? I thought I locked you in the dog crate before I left.

Z: I'm not stupid like dogs are. I unlocked the door. As to why I'm here, I've come to talk to General Antilles.

CRD & W: He's not here. Go Away.

CRD: Too bad Zsinj. He stayed home today.

W: to CRD he hates meetings of course he didn't show up.

CRD: But he doesn't have to know that.

Meanwhile Zsinj was rambling on about why Warious shouldn't have locked him in the dog crate. They ignored him.

W: Blah blah blah blah blah, That's all they do in these meetings! So bored...falling into...dark side...influence. Going...bad!

H: Warious behave. Remember what happened last time you did this?

W: I am EVIL!...What happened?

Haldir whispered something in Warious' ear, and she turned red.

W: Okay not going too be evil. I don't want that to happen again.

H: Drat.

Commander looks suspiciously at them but said nothing...yet.

Zsinj is still ranting, while Darth Maul contemplates ways on shutting him up.

W: Shut up Zsinj and go away if you're not going to be helpful.

Zsinj: Fine I'll leave. Be that way!

Zsinj left.

W: What a baby! How did he ever make warlord in the first place?

CRD: Bribes, lots of bribes.

W: That explains it.

CRD: What happened last time you went dark?

W: None of your business.

CRD: Come on. Tell me please?

Warious started turning red again

W: NO NO NO!

Commander turned to Haldir glaring lasers at him.

CRD: What?

H: I'm not telling.

W: Hey, you just talked to him!

CRD: You weren't giving me any answers.

W: Hey look, the meetings ended! See ya later!

Darth Warious bolts to the door to escape further interrogation from her friend. Maul and Haldir got in the car after a brief struggle over who got to ride in the front seat.

Once they got home Warious proceeded to collapse into bed and fell asleep.

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A/n: Review me please.