MEANWHILE... AT THE CAMPSITE
"I shouldn't have told you." said Inuyasha to Miroku the next morning, while Kagome was sipping Hearty Japanese Tea at Kaede's.
"You had to, Inuyasha. We would have found out sooner or later that you were... a pie." said Miroku slowly, still in disbelief that Inuyasha had been a pie all this time.
"I mean, you couldn't have kept it a secret forever..."
"But now Kagome hates me!" wailed Inuyasha. "My life is ruined! All because I'm a stupid PIE!"
"She dosen't hate you! She's just no used to it... she'll come around." said Miroku unconvincly.
"Yeah, right." said Inuyasha, tears spilling down his cheeks [on his face, perverts]. "You know what they say about pies."
Miroku stared at him for a few seconds before saying confusedly,
"Um, no. What do they say about pies?"
Inuyasha tried to dry his eyes with his sleeve. He took a deep breath before he choked out, "A penny saved is a penny earned!"
Miroku blinked. "Uh, Inuyasha, that has nothing to do with pies--"
"Oh, forget it! You wouldn't understand what's it like to be a PIE!" shrieked Inuyasha. With that he turned around and ran sobbing into the woods.
"Wait! Inuyasha!" called Miroku, jogging up to the edge of the woods. Inuyasha's sobs were now faint cries in the distance. Miroku stopped slowly and leaned against a tree.
"I do know what it's like..." Miroku said to himself.
MEANWHILE... AT KAEDE'S
"Kagome? Kagome, are you here?" said Sango loudly, walking through Kaede's hut.
"Sango?" said Kagome.
Sango heard Kagome's voice and followed it into the kitchen, patting it on the head and giving it a tasty biscuit on arrival for being such a helpful guide.
"We wondered where you ran off to." said Sango, sitting down at the table with Kagome.
"I just needed to get away." said Kagome, taking a swig of Hearty Japanese Tea from a tea kettle in front of her.
"Look, Kagome... I know you're surprised... and probably confused..." started Sango, moving five or six empty tea cups away from her so that she could fold her hands on the table.
"I'm not confused... just disappointed." interrupted Kagome.
"Why are you disappointed?" asked Sango.
"This tea... it only comes in three flavors... I guess I knew all along that Kaede didn't have much variety, but sitting here drinking cup after cup I finally realize the true stinginess of her groceries... that cheap bitch." said Kagome.
"Kagome, I'm taking about the fact that INUYASHA IS A PIE." said Sango.
"Oh. That." said Kagome. "How is he?"
"Not well. Miroku said he ran crying into the woods this morning." said Sango.
"Then I must go find him!" cried Kagome suddenly, standing up and slamming her kettle down, spilling the contents onto the table.
"Maybe it's just all this tea talking... or maybe it's something more... but I must find my love and bring him back to where he belongs!" said Kagome.
"Kagome... this isn't tea." said Sango, leaning down towards the puddle on the table and sniffing it.
"So what if he's a pie? So what if I'm a human? I'm going to prove to the world that pastries and humans can live in harmony... and love!" shrieked Kagome dramatically.
"...This is transmission fluid."
"Goodbye, Sango! I fare thee well! I am off to find my love!" And with that, Kagome ran off into the crop fields outside the hut.
"Come on, Shippo... we can go inside my hut... No one is there anymore, I just saw Kagome run out through the feilds." said Kaede, guiding Shippo onto the porch steps.
Shippo giggled. "This is so exciting." he whispered, clutching Kaede's hand tighter.
"I know it is." said Kaede, opening the door.
They walked out into the living room, still holding hands. Shippo eyed the futon couch sitting against the wall and grinned at Kaede.
"I was thinking the same thing." said Kaede, as they both sank down into the cushions, with Shippo on the bottom.
He reached up and started unbuttoning Kaede's shirt while Kaede removed the green bow from Shippo's head.
"Hurry, Shippo... I can wait no more..." said Kaede, leaning in closer to the young fox's face.
Shippo lifted his head and french kissed Kaede for a full seven seconds.
"Oh, Shippo... you are so small... and yet so big." said Kaede, taking off the last of Shippo's garments.
"And so are you." said Shippo, doing the same.
Sango walked aimlessly into the room, about to leave through the front door.
"Sango!" demanded Kaede, startled, "What YE be doing here??"
Sango screamed and ran full speed out the door to the campsite, pausing only to vomit on an unsuspecting shrub named Herbert a few yards from the house.
"INUYASHA! INUYASHA! MY LO--AHHH" screamed Kagome, tripping over an inconveinantly placed rock and sprawling out onto the forest floor.
She spit out a mouthful of mud and sat up quickly, only to discover her entire front was smeared with dirt and grime.
"Inuyasha, where ARE YOU?" demanded Kagome.
"He's not here." said an ominous voice.
Kagome whipped around.
"Oh, it's just you, Miroku." she said, sighing in relief. She stood up.
"He went back to the campsite." explained Miroku.
"Oh." said Kagome.
They stood in silence for a few moments before Miroku said,
"You know, Kagome... I understand what you're going through."
"You do? How?" asked Kagome.
"Well, see, once when I was little... I was in ballet." he started. "And all the other kids never sweat that much... and one day... I got really sweaty... and there were stains all over my armpits..."
Kagome's eyes widened in horror and sympathy.
"And I knew everyone was looking at them... So I told them that my sister put lotion on my leotard to get back at me for something and make it LOOK like I had armpit stains." finished Miroku.
"Oh, Miroku... I never knew." said Kagome.
"So you see... I know how you felt when you found out Inuyasha was a pie. It was like being in a ballet class and having armpit stains and telling everyone it was lotion." said Miroku wisely.
Kagome nodded, with a new level of respect for Miroku.
"Come on," she said. "Let's go back to the campsite."
"I shouldn't have told you." said Inuyasha to Miroku the next morning, while Kagome was sipping Hearty Japanese Tea at Kaede's.
"You had to, Inuyasha. We would have found out sooner or later that you were... a pie." said Miroku slowly, still in disbelief that Inuyasha had been a pie all this time.
"I mean, you couldn't have kept it a secret forever..."
"But now Kagome hates me!" wailed Inuyasha. "My life is ruined! All because I'm a stupid PIE!"
"She dosen't hate you! She's just no used to it... she'll come around." said Miroku unconvincly.
"Yeah, right." said Inuyasha, tears spilling down his cheeks [on his face, perverts]. "You know what they say about pies."
Miroku stared at him for a few seconds before saying confusedly,
"Um, no. What do they say about pies?"
Inuyasha tried to dry his eyes with his sleeve. He took a deep breath before he choked out, "A penny saved is a penny earned!"
Miroku blinked. "Uh, Inuyasha, that has nothing to do with pies--"
"Oh, forget it! You wouldn't understand what's it like to be a PIE!" shrieked Inuyasha. With that he turned around and ran sobbing into the woods.
"Wait! Inuyasha!" called Miroku, jogging up to the edge of the woods. Inuyasha's sobs were now faint cries in the distance. Miroku stopped slowly and leaned against a tree.
"I do know what it's like..." Miroku said to himself.
MEANWHILE... AT KAEDE'S
"Kagome? Kagome, are you here?" said Sango loudly, walking through Kaede's hut.
"Sango?" said Kagome.
Sango heard Kagome's voice and followed it into the kitchen, patting it on the head and giving it a tasty biscuit on arrival for being such a helpful guide.
"We wondered where you ran off to." said Sango, sitting down at the table with Kagome.
"I just needed to get away." said Kagome, taking a swig of Hearty Japanese Tea from a tea kettle in front of her.
"Look, Kagome... I know you're surprised... and probably confused..." started Sango, moving five or six empty tea cups away from her so that she could fold her hands on the table.
"I'm not confused... just disappointed." interrupted Kagome.
"Why are you disappointed?" asked Sango.
"This tea... it only comes in three flavors... I guess I knew all along that Kaede didn't have much variety, but sitting here drinking cup after cup I finally realize the true stinginess of her groceries... that cheap bitch." said Kagome.
"Kagome, I'm taking about the fact that INUYASHA IS A PIE." said Sango.
"Oh. That." said Kagome. "How is he?"
"Not well. Miroku said he ran crying into the woods this morning." said Sango.
"Then I must go find him!" cried Kagome suddenly, standing up and slamming her kettle down, spilling the contents onto the table.
"Maybe it's just all this tea talking... or maybe it's something more... but I must find my love and bring him back to where he belongs!" said Kagome.
"Kagome... this isn't tea." said Sango, leaning down towards the puddle on the table and sniffing it.
"So what if he's a pie? So what if I'm a human? I'm going to prove to the world that pastries and humans can live in harmony... and love!" shrieked Kagome dramatically.
"...This is transmission fluid."
"Goodbye, Sango! I fare thee well! I am off to find my love!" And with that, Kagome ran off into the crop fields outside the hut.
"Come on, Shippo... we can go inside my hut... No one is there anymore, I just saw Kagome run out through the feilds." said Kaede, guiding Shippo onto the porch steps.
Shippo giggled. "This is so exciting." he whispered, clutching Kaede's hand tighter.
"I know it is." said Kaede, opening the door.
They walked out into the living room, still holding hands. Shippo eyed the futon couch sitting against the wall and grinned at Kaede.
"I was thinking the same thing." said Kaede, as they both sank down into the cushions, with Shippo on the bottom.
He reached up and started unbuttoning Kaede's shirt while Kaede removed the green bow from Shippo's head.
"Hurry, Shippo... I can wait no more..." said Kaede, leaning in closer to the young fox's face.
Shippo lifted his head and french kissed Kaede for a full seven seconds.
"Oh, Shippo... you are so small... and yet so big." said Kaede, taking off the last of Shippo's garments.
"And so are you." said Shippo, doing the same.
Sango walked aimlessly into the room, about to leave through the front door.
"Sango!" demanded Kaede, startled, "What YE be doing here??"
Sango screamed and ran full speed out the door to the campsite, pausing only to vomit on an unsuspecting shrub named Herbert a few yards from the house.
"INUYASHA! INUYASHA! MY LO--AHHH" screamed Kagome, tripping over an inconveinantly placed rock and sprawling out onto the forest floor.
She spit out a mouthful of mud and sat up quickly, only to discover her entire front was smeared with dirt and grime.
"Inuyasha, where ARE YOU?" demanded Kagome.
"He's not here." said an ominous voice.
Kagome whipped around.
"Oh, it's just you, Miroku." she said, sighing in relief. She stood up.
"He went back to the campsite." explained Miroku.
"Oh." said Kagome.
They stood in silence for a few moments before Miroku said,
"You know, Kagome... I understand what you're going through."
"You do? How?" asked Kagome.
"Well, see, once when I was little... I was in ballet." he started. "And all the other kids never sweat that much... and one day... I got really sweaty... and there were stains all over my armpits..."
Kagome's eyes widened in horror and sympathy.
"And I knew everyone was looking at them... So I told them that my sister put lotion on my leotard to get back at me for something and make it LOOK like I had armpit stains." finished Miroku.
"Oh, Miroku... I never knew." said Kagome.
"So you see... I know how you felt when you found out Inuyasha was a pie. It was like being in a ballet class and having armpit stains and telling everyone it was lotion." said Miroku wisely.
Kagome nodded, with a new level of respect for Miroku.
"Come on," she said. "Let's go back to the campsite."