Dude, I dunno when I'm gonna finish this, and this is just a bit of a filler chapter that is sort of relevant to the story. But it's a very wise chapter indeed. It's citrusy, no doubt in the way that there's a lemon-fresh scent because I'm not going to get into super sex-scenes. And it's all I gots 'cuz my plot bunnies are sleeping :( And many thanks to my reviewers. Save me. ............................................................................ ............................................................................ .......................................

We find the setting in Hogesmeade peeking in on Harry and Cho's earlier scheduled date. Harry, as the unfortunate lady's man he isn't, is struggling to keep conversation.

"Cho, have you ever tried a Cockroach Cluster?" he asked as they looked at the strange candies.

"No, have you?" Cho asked seductively.

"No."

"Want to?" She winked at him.

Harry, not being able to sense Cho trying to seduce him said, "Not really."

Cho sighed, "Me either."

"How about a Vampire Lolly?"

"I gave one to my sister once."

"What did she do?"

"Ate it."

"Oh."

"She's half vampire."

"Ooooh... That must be interesting."

"Yea, it kind of is. Sometimes she asks for my used tampons," she said blandly.

"Oh. Er... do you give them to her?" Harry was feeling very uncomfortable, but still wanted Cho to take her blouse off.

"If she asks please, I do." she nodded.

"That's always fun."

"Sometimes, others it's just disgusting."

"Yes, I certainly agree. Care to catch a butterbeer at the Three Broomsticks?" said Harry who was feeling very horny and very queasy at the same time.

"Sure, would you escort me to the register?" she held out her arm.

"I'd love to."

And so they made their way to the Three Broomsticks. It was very crowded due to all of the third years being noisy and enjoying the novelty of their first trip to the village. Harry looked around for someone he knew, which was everyone because of course, everyone knew him. But what he was looking for was someone he could look cool and hip with, which was everyone because all the third years wanted to say hello to him and what not, so Cho felt very good indeed. What with being with Harry and all, who was a very hip man for the time being.

"Let's find a seat." Cho nudged him to a very cozy table in the back corner of the pub.

They chatted it up for a bit until Cho decided they'd talked to long and started macking with Harry. And of course, Harry being a very inexperienced man had no idea what to do other than to go along with it.

He is the worst kisser, ever, Cho thought herself, it's making me so goddamn horny.

And so they sat there snogging each other for an entire 15 minutes until-

"So the Pothead has a girlfriend?"

Harry looked up from his work at a very pleased looking Draco, "Wonderful to see you, Draco."

"And your whore is looking mighty fine, too."

Harry felt the need to snog her some more, but felt it was only right to defend her, "Draco, why don't you go find yourself a copy of Play Wizard so you can imagine yourself with Cho."

Of course, Harry being very stupid had no idea what he said, exactly, and Cho slapped him, "What the hell!?"

"Cho, I didn't mean it like that! I-"

Draco left the pub, with a butterbeer with a bit of spirit to it, laughing his head off. Harry and Cho had other things in mind. Of course it has something to do with sex because Cho is a whore and Harry is horny.

"Pst!" Harry nudged the nearest adult.

"Yes, Harry?" it was McGonagall.

"Oh, I was uh... just wondering if I did well on that exam the other day?" Harry asked innocently.

"Harry, you know I can't tell you until I hand them out in class." she pursed her lips and turned away.

"Ooops," Harry shrugged to Cho who was drawing pictures on her placemat. He poked the next nearest adult who turned out to be one of Ron's favourite customers, who was ironically, Silas Clearwater.

"Yo." he said stupidly.

"Um... You're 18, right?" Harry asked uncertainly.

"Yea, dawg. Why, ya need me to get somethin' for ya?"

Harry eased up, "Yea, whatever this'll get me."

Silas took the money Harry was handing him and shouted for his waitress.

Cho winked at Harry and mouthed, "Ya got it?"

Harry just nodded stupidly.

Five minutes later Harry and Cho were running out of the pub with masses of alcohol under their cloaks.

"I can't beleive we got all of that!" Cho whispered excitedly.

Harry just shrugged like he did it all the time, which made him look very cool indeed. He then led her off to a secluded room in the castle. ............................................................................ ............................................................................ .......................................

"So how was your date?" Ron asked Harry who had just walked into the common room with a slap happy look on his face.

"Real good." Harry was now making his way to his dorms with Ron following at his heels.

"How good?"

"Mmm..."

"Tell me!"

"Ron, can't you see Harry doesn't want to talk!?" came Hermione's voice from inside the dorm.

"Hermione!"

"What?"

"You're not supposed to be in here!"

"I wouldn't have been if you hadn't raised the goddamn price! I fucking hate you!" Hermione pulled out her wand threateningly.

"Now, Hermione... Don't do anything you're going to regret..." Ron was slowly walking up to her, his hands out.

"I think I'll let you two handle this..." Harry said as he left for a more peaceful area where he could think about his wonderfully erotic day. ............................................................................ ............................................................................ .......................................

Yay! End transmission. Eat donut. Then Review. Or Review, then eat a donut.