Remus' POV
They are brewing something.
I don't know what it is, but it is to do with me.
Harry says it is to help me, though I didn't ask. He says it will be ready two days before the next full moon.
If it works…
No.
I cannot get my hopes up. I refuse to be hurt again. It is ridiculous to contemplate Harry being able to find anything that will help me.
I have only five days left until I can leave this existence behind me. That is the time I promised my Mate. I will not fail him; I must last that long.
Devotion to somebody who has been dead for four years… and left me alone for twelve before that.
That is the way of my kind. I cannot even comprehend feeling this way for another. It is all encompassing.
And it is devastating.
When he left for Azkaban it wasn't so bad. The wolf understood that he was alive, and assumed he would come back soon.
I… well… I forced myself to stay alive. I thought he had betrayed me. And the others. I refused to break down because of him.
This time I know he loved me. I know that and so see no reason why I shouldn't mourn him. Also the wolf mourns his Mate, I cannot control that.
I do not want to.
I think the others are starting to fear me. That is not what I intended. I should probably return to Grimmauld. I will not be in the way there.
Life is so unfair. I did not ask for any of this… Please, I want it all to end. The pain, you have no idea…
Third Person POV
Harry watched silently as Hermione checked on their simmering concoction. She nodded, looking pleased and Harry sighed inwardly.
"This would be easier if you just stayed here…" he pointed out.
"Yes," she nodded slowly, "but I like staying at home. I will come and check on it again tomorrow."
"Bye…" was all Harry managed to say before she disapparated.
Ron glanced at the cauldron as he entered the room,
"I put my ear against the door and heard him growl, so we know he is awake."
Harry rolled his eyes,
"Do you go out of your way to irritate him?"
Ron shook his head,
"The guy likes to growl at me, I am just giving him the opportunity…"
Harry laughed suddenly,
"Fine. I'm going to bed."
Ron nodded,
"Sure. Excluding the remainder of today we only have three days now…"
"Yeah…" Harry nodded as they trudged upstairs.
"Do you know what you are going to say yet?" Ron asked, curiously.
"Not quite… I'm working on it."
Remus' POV
Harry says their potion will be ready by tomorrow.
I am nervous.
It could be the new turning point in my life. The time when everything becomes good again…
NO! I will NOT do this to myself!
I can't face another failure…
However, it is ok, I remind myself, if it does not work I rejoin my Mate the very next day.
If it does not work I will still be free.
Death is my last comfort.
My photos sit in the corner of my room. I cannot face them anymore.
Instead I spend more time in a shallow doze. Not enough to dream, but enough to pass time more quickly.
I am so very tired.
I have had no more messages from my Mate, and I miss him more than ever.
It is ok, though, I look forward to rejoining him in two days.
Third Person POV
"I think I have it…" Harry muttered while pacing up and down the kitchen.
"Let's hear it then," Ron encouraged.
" 'Let those who made great sacrifices be rewarded' No, that doesn't sound right…" Harry moaned, "it sounds like we want the Powers to reward the bad guys too…"
"How's about something like 'get what's coming to them'?" Ron suggested.
"Too vague," Hermione dismissed. She was doing one last check on the potion.
"Right…"
"This is hard…" Harry muttered.
"I told you to think about it earlier, but you always insist in doing things last minute!"
"I did think about it earlier…"
Hermione rolled her eyes but didn't say anything.
"'Let the marauders who made great sacrifices be allowed their justice'," Harry tried.
"Ooh, I like that one!" Hermione nodded.
Harry grinned,
"Great, I'll go with that one."
"What do we do now?" Ron asked.
"I go get Remus," Harry moved to the door. "Then we get him to drink some of that and I have to tell the Greater Powers the words I just told you. Then… then we wait and see."
Harry left to collect Remus.
Remus' POV
I blink at Harry as he enters my room.
"Remus?" he always starts conversations like that resonantly.
"Yes, Harry?"
"We are ready," he tells me, "come down and take the potion."
I nod and follow him down to the kitchen. I notice the other two back away slowly so as to not upset me. I do not acknowledge them.
Harry hands me a large goblet of black liquid. I glance at him, then down the liquid in one gulp.
I gasp as it stings my throat and tears appear in my eyes. I feel my muscles tense involuntarily and I look over to Harry helplessly.
He has his eyes closed and makes no sound, though his lips form words over and over.
I'm scared.
My muscles are spasming and it hurts. I want it to stop.
"Harry?" I drop to my knees and wrap my arms around my chest. I gasp for air, forcing my lungs to obey.
I let out a soft cry, then fall unconscious.
I hear voices.
Harry, Ron and Hermione. I can nearly make out their words…
"…this would happen…"
"None of us did…"
"So this is what they think he deserves?"
"He gets a new life."
"But is he over Sirius?"
"Harry?" I murmur.
"Remus, do you feel ok?"
I nod slowly and open my eyes.
The first thing I notice is that my senses are sharp again.
"What has happened to me?" I sit up slowly and rub my head.
"Err…"
Hermione hands me a mirror.
I stare at her for a second, then look into the mirror.
My eyes widen,
"No…"
"Remus, it's ok…"
"No no nonononono," I shake my head, my eyes glued to the image before me.
"Remus…"
"You don't understand," I sob suddenly, "this body, it has only just lost it's Mate. I will go through that all over again. This is not what I wanted…"
"Remus…"
I shove the mirror at Hermione and flee to my room.
I collapse on my bed and sob uncontrollably.
My body is 21 again.
The Powers have given me a new life, but one equally filled with pain.
Author Notes:
I am still amazed by how many people actually like this story... Well, I hope I don't disapoint you. Thank you for the reviews, they make my day!
PS This story isn't finished, don't worry!