Richard Allen George...No, It's Just Cheez
Disclaimer: Nope, I still haven't got them.
"Harry, this is idiotic. You know Snape's part of the order! Why in Merlin's name are you suspecting him of anything?"
"He and Malfoy are up to something. I know it!"
"Really Harry. After six and a half years of saving your behind, you think Snape is going to suddenly concoct a plan to bring about your demise that involves sneaking around at all hours of the night with Malfoy in tow? I seriously doubt it."
"Then explain what he's doing with that orb thing. It has to be a weapon of some sort!"
"Remember the noodle incident? Didn't you promise not to accuse Snape of anything without absolute proof last year?"
"How was I supposed to know? That wasn't my fault! Anyway, I know this thing is important. I've seen it before." s "Voldemort?"
"He's been trying to get it for months. And now Snape and Malfoy mysteriously turn up with it? We have to get it from them."
"Gods, Harry! Fine. Let's go. But for the record, I'm only doing this so that you don't make an even bigger arse of yourself than last time."
"'Mione?"
Aaahh. The sweet smell of burning eyebrow curled around her sensitive nostrils. Harry should have received that rather subtle hint that he was not everyone's Wonderboy at the moment. Nothing conveyed mild irritation better than the forcible removal of hair in embarrassing places. And now he had an expression of perpetual clueless-ness and confusion that rivaled Ron's. Oops. There was a spark left in one of his bangs, necessitating the extinguish-in-snow-face-first method of course, which she dutifully applied without hesitation.
"Ow!"
Hope that didn't hurt. Much.
A deep rumbling to her left drew her attention away from the hapless Boy Wonder to the singularly bizarre spectacle of the large black dragon, flames spewing mirthfully from both nostrils and open mouth, rolling about the snow in- laughter? Was that Snape? Laughing? She couldn't decide which was stranger; the fact that the man who she had thought of as so uptight that any sort of levity would painfully expel the Hippogriff he had stuck up his arse was expressing true positive human emotion, or that she could hear his natural voice chuckling along with the grunting dragon giggles.
Apparently the sight captured the boys' attention as well, as they had switched from gaping in shock at the makeover flambé to gaping in shock at their transfigured professor. She let Harry fall to the ground as gently as she felt able, under the circumstances. His jaw remained slacked open in the process. At least Harry and Ron were gaping; Draco had the largest slimy grin she had ever seen on him.
"I never thought I'd be saying this, but congratulations, Granger. That made this descent into Hades almost worth it."
She growled a polite "thank you," then turned back to Snape, who was trying with limited success to regain some semblance of self-control. He managed to sit back on his hind legs, wiping tears from his eyes that steamed at impact with the snow.
Fifty points to Gryffindor, Ms. Granger.
That confirmed it. He had definitely cracked. At least he was momentarily distracted from her earlier actions, the consequences of which she knew would be dire indeed. Though she had a very good reason for doing so, namely to avert Ron's fate as a Snape snack, she had nonetheless assaulted a teacher. And considering their current species, in a very inappropriate manner. She did not really wish to examine her motives behind choosing that particular strategy of attack, and could only imagine what his response to that and the fiasco in the dungeons will be. That final part was not entirely her fault. She had made her protestations very clear from the beginning. Even so, she had a feeling that Gryffindor would be so far in the negative after they got out of here that no amount of last minute bonus points Dumbledore gave them would overcome the deficit. For several years, even.
After another half-minute, Snape had gone ominously silent. When he spoke, his voice was low and smooth, the growling behind it a malevolent purr, with an occasional edge of sharpness in his words betraying his anger.
Sufficient punishment may not exist for the severity of your misconduct. Nevertheless-
But sir-
Quiet, Granger! I will take great satisfaction in petitioning for the expulsion of all three of you. For now, twenty points each for breaking curfew, fifty points apiece for attacking a professor-
Bollocks. She had to swipe at the nearest dead husk of a tree with her tail to prevent a repeat performance of that infraction.
-an extra fifty for your last stunt, Ms. Granger, seventy-five each for general incompetence and stupidity-
Her claws ground a death hold into the rock beneath her.
-two hundred points each for possibly permanent injury to a teacher-
She flexed her wings with a low growl. He wasn't the only one turned into a bloody dragon. In fact, most would look on it as an improvement, as he was much less greasy in this form-
-and one hundred points for every minute from now until I find a way out of this.
Bloody infuriating git. He was probably enjoying this.
Any objections, Ms. Granger? His normal sneer was even more annoying with an overabundance of teeth visible.
No. Piss off, you self-righteous pile of shite. Sir.
"What do you suppose they're talking about, Harry?"
"Hopefully they've decided to rip you in half and roast you on a spit, Weaselboy."
Ron? Harry?
"Looks like 'Mione's trying to say something to us."
You two had better not be fooling around. I swear, Harry, if this is a joke-
Do you enjoy listening to yourself blather away, or do you lack the capacity to consider the slight possibility that your otherwise impressively talented companions may not be able to understand "Dragon?"
His wings were folded smugly at his back as he regarded her, toothy smirk firmly in place.
How fortunate for me to be the only audience to your always scintillating one-sided conversation. I have long awaited this wonderful opportunity, but never truly hoped it would come to pass. I am... grateful for this sudden change in circumstances.
She snapped when he raised one spiky eyebrow.
Blow me, you sanctimonious arsewipe! As if it was my dying wish to be blessed with your contumelious presence!
Ms. Granger! I'm warning you-
With what implement of my destruction, exactly? According to you, I'm already expelled-
Ms. Granger-
His interjection consisted mostly of a growl, and she noticed that his posture was slightly less relaxed than it had been before her rebellion. His wings flexed as he brought his head down, and his tail began to twitch threateningly.
-which is not a spectacular show of foresight on your part, is it? Why would I care about House points after that?
She shifted her weight forward, adopting the stance of a bull readying for toreador destruction.
Granger! Kindly shut that flapping beak of yours before-
He had gone back down on all fours, mimicking her offensive position.
Before you do what, Snape? Try to eat Ron again?
If Ron and Harry could have understood their discussion, they might have warned Snape that Hermione's deliberate action of dropping the honorific "professor" from in front of his name was rare indeed, and indication that she was well and truly furious. As it was, he lacked their expert advice, and was probably too far gone in his own ire to take heed of it anyway. Flames punctuated his every word in a manner that would have been funny, under other circumstances.
You will address me by my title, Ms. Granger!
Not until I find some worthiness of respect in your behavior, which is bloody childish-
Snape, probably in order to avoid a repeat of her sneak attack that started their last battle, launched himself toward her first. Hermione was ready, however, and twisted to the side enough to absorb his attack while using his momentum against him to prevent him pinning her. They rolled, a flurry of teeth and claws, as she tried to take to the air and he did all in his power to stop her. Neither took any notice of their surroundings until Snape was struck in the eye by a snowball. He howled in pain and fury and disentangled himself from Hermione to search for the perpetrator with the intent of ripping him limb from limb. Neither had noticed the fast coming of nightfall, nor that the snowstorm had grown steadily worse. The wind blew the heavy snowfall into a white wall that obscured vision beyond five feet. The projectile that had injured Snape must have been an extraordinarily lucky throw.
"Professor! Hermione!"
The shouts were almost drowned out by the howling wind, but both dragons were able to follow them and landed next to the huddled boys. All three were practically frozen, their robes little help against the cold without warming charms. In a temporary (and unspoken) truce, the dragons curled protectively around the three, forming a shelter of warm blocking the wind and snow.
Do you think we should wait until morning to move anywhere?
Hermione was relieved to see color returning to Harry, Ron, and, Gods forbid, Draco's skin as they passed into the care of Morpheus.
That would seem to be the only option at the moment, Ms. Granger.
Surprisingly, his voice lacked most of its usual malice, most of his attention focused on ensuring Draco's safety. He tucked the young Slytherin to his side with more compassion than Hermione ever thought possible, even gently ruffling the boy's mussed blond hair in the process.
Sir, if you don't mind me asking, do you know where we are? Or how this happened?
He sighed, melting the snow in front of him.
I am never free of your questions, am I? I have no clue where we are specifically, but I would guess that this is a twisted product of Potter's mind. I do not know what deal he brokered with that infernal globe.
What?
Gods be praised, something the everlasting Know-It-All hasn't read about? Your idiot friend activated a... modified... puzzle ball. We will be trapped in it until we solve whatever tasks it has given us.
But what-
I would appreciate it greatly if you could save the rest of your interrogation for what passes as morning, Ms. Granger. It pains me, but I promise to answer all of your questions then.
Alright. Goodnight, sir.
Goodnight.
Sir, would you please keep your tail to yourself?
I've no idea what you're talking about, Ms. Granger. Goodnight.
Hope you liked it. I am working on the next part, but my inspiration seems to have run away. Reward of points to your respective house if you find it. Thanks.
Disclaimer: Nope, I still haven't got them.
"Harry, this is idiotic. You know Snape's part of the order! Why in Merlin's name are you suspecting him of anything?"
"He and Malfoy are up to something. I know it!"
"Really Harry. After six and a half years of saving your behind, you think Snape is going to suddenly concoct a plan to bring about your demise that involves sneaking around at all hours of the night with Malfoy in tow? I seriously doubt it."
"Then explain what he's doing with that orb thing. It has to be a weapon of some sort!"
"Remember the noodle incident? Didn't you promise not to accuse Snape of anything without absolute proof last year?"
"How was I supposed to know? That wasn't my fault! Anyway, I know this thing is important. I've seen it before." s "Voldemort?"
"He's been trying to get it for months. And now Snape and Malfoy mysteriously turn up with it? We have to get it from them."
"Gods, Harry! Fine. Let's go. But for the record, I'm only doing this so that you don't make an even bigger arse of yourself than last time."
"'Mione?"
Aaahh. The sweet smell of burning eyebrow curled around her sensitive nostrils. Harry should have received that rather subtle hint that he was not everyone's Wonderboy at the moment. Nothing conveyed mild irritation better than the forcible removal of hair in embarrassing places. And now he had an expression of perpetual clueless-ness and confusion that rivaled Ron's. Oops. There was a spark left in one of his bangs, necessitating the extinguish-in-snow-face-first method of course, which she dutifully applied without hesitation.
"Ow!"
Hope that didn't hurt. Much.
A deep rumbling to her left drew her attention away from the hapless Boy Wonder to the singularly bizarre spectacle of the large black dragon, flames spewing mirthfully from both nostrils and open mouth, rolling about the snow in- laughter? Was that Snape? Laughing? She couldn't decide which was stranger; the fact that the man who she had thought of as so uptight that any sort of levity would painfully expel the Hippogriff he had stuck up his arse was expressing true positive human emotion, or that she could hear his natural voice chuckling along with the grunting dragon giggles.
Apparently the sight captured the boys' attention as well, as they had switched from gaping in shock at the makeover flambé to gaping in shock at their transfigured professor. She let Harry fall to the ground as gently as she felt able, under the circumstances. His jaw remained slacked open in the process. At least Harry and Ron were gaping; Draco had the largest slimy grin she had ever seen on him.
"I never thought I'd be saying this, but congratulations, Granger. That made this descent into Hades almost worth it."
She growled a polite "thank you," then turned back to Snape, who was trying with limited success to regain some semblance of self-control. He managed to sit back on his hind legs, wiping tears from his eyes that steamed at impact with the snow.
Fifty points to Gryffindor, Ms. Granger.
That confirmed it. He had definitely cracked. At least he was momentarily distracted from her earlier actions, the consequences of which she knew would be dire indeed. Though she had a very good reason for doing so, namely to avert Ron's fate as a Snape snack, she had nonetheless assaulted a teacher. And considering their current species, in a very inappropriate manner. She did not really wish to examine her motives behind choosing that particular strategy of attack, and could only imagine what his response to that and the fiasco in the dungeons will be. That final part was not entirely her fault. She had made her protestations very clear from the beginning. Even so, she had a feeling that Gryffindor would be so far in the negative after they got out of here that no amount of last minute bonus points Dumbledore gave them would overcome the deficit. For several years, even.
After another half-minute, Snape had gone ominously silent. When he spoke, his voice was low and smooth, the growling behind it a malevolent purr, with an occasional edge of sharpness in his words betraying his anger.
Sufficient punishment may not exist for the severity of your misconduct. Nevertheless-
But sir-
Quiet, Granger! I will take great satisfaction in petitioning for the expulsion of all three of you. For now, twenty points each for breaking curfew, fifty points apiece for attacking a professor-
Bollocks. She had to swipe at the nearest dead husk of a tree with her tail to prevent a repeat performance of that infraction.
-an extra fifty for your last stunt, Ms. Granger, seventy-five each for general incompetence and stupidity-
Her claws ground a death hold into the rock beneath her.
-two hundred points each for possibly permanent injury to a teacher-
She flexed her wings with a low growl. He wasn't the only one turned into a bloody dragon. In fact, most would look on it as an improvement, as he was much less greasy in this form-
-and one hundred points for every minute from now until I find a way out of this.
Bloody infuriating git. He was probably enjoying this.
Any objections, Ms. Granger? His normal sneer was even more annoying with an overabundance of teeth visible.
No. Piss off, you self-righteous pile of shite. Sir.
"What do you suppose they're talking about, Harry?"
"Hopefully they've decided to rip you in half and roast you on a spit, Weaselboy."
Ron? Harry?
"Looks like 'Mione's trying to say something to us."
You two had better not be fooling around. I swear, Harry, if this is a joke-
Do you enjoy listening to yourself blather away, or do you lack the capacity to consider the slight possibility that your otherwise impressively talented companions may not be able to understand "Dragon?"
His wings were folded smugly at his back as he regarded her, toothy smirk firmly in place.
How fortunate for me to be the only audience to your always scintillating one-sided conversation. I have long awaited this wonderful opportunity, but never truly hoped it would come to pass. I am... grateful for this sudden change in circumstances.
She snapped when he raised one spiky eyebrow.
Blow me, you sanctimonious arsewipe! As if it was my dying wish to be blessed with your contumelious presence!
Ms. Granger! I'm warning you-
With what implement of my destruction, exactly? According to you, I'm already expelled-
Ms. Granger-
His interjection consisted mostly of a growl, and she noticed that his posture was slightly less relaxed than it had been before her rebellion. His wings flexed as he brought his head down, and his tail began to twitch threateningly.
-which is not a spectacular show of foresight on your part, is it? Why would I care about House points after that?
She shifted her weight forward, adopting the stance of a bull readying for toreador destruction.
Granger! Kindly shut that flapping beak of yours before-
He had gone back down on all fours, mimicking her offensive position.
Before you do what, Snape? Try to eat Ron again?
If Ron and Harry could have understood their discussion, they might have warned Snape that Hermione's deliberate action of dropping the honorific "professor" from in front of his name was rare indeed, and indication that she was well and truly furious. As it was, he lacked their expert advice, and was probably too far gone in his own ire to take heed of it anyway. Flames punctuated his every word in a manner that would have been funny, under other circumstances.
You will address me by my title, Ms. Granger!
Not until I find some worthiness of respect in your behavior, which is bloody childish-
Snape, probably in order to avoid a repeat of her sneak attack that started their last battle, launched himself toward her first. Hermione was ready, however, and twisted to the side enough to absorb his attack while using his momentum against him to prevent him pinning her. They rolled, a flurry of teeth and claws, as she tried to take to the air and he did all in his power to stop her. Neither took any notice of their surroundings until Snape was struck in the eye by a snowball. He howled in pain and fury and disentangled himself from Hermione to search for the perpetrator with the intent of ripping him limb from limb. Neither had noticed the fast coming of nightfall, nor that the snowstorm had grown steadily worse. The wind blew the heavy snowfall into a white wall that obscured vision beyond five feet. The projectile that had injured Snape must have been an extraordinarily lucky throw.
"Professor! Hermione!"
The shouts were almost drowned out by the howling wind, but both dragons were able to follow them and landed next to the huddled boys. All three were practically frozen, their robes little help against the cold without warming charms. In a temporary (and unspoken) truce, the dragons curled protectively around the three, forming a shelter of warm blocking the wind and snow.
Do you think we should wait until morning to move anywhere?
Hermione was relieved to see color returning to Harry, Ron, and, Gods forbid, Draco's skin as they passed into the care of Morpheus.
That would seem to be the only option at the moment, Ms. Granger.
Surprisingly, his voice lacked most of its usual malice, most of his attention focused on ensuring Draco's safety. He tucked the young Slytherin to his side with more compassion than Hermione ever thought possible, even gently ruffling the boy's mussed blond hair in the process.
Sir, if you don't mind me asking, do you know where we are? Or how this happened?
He sighed, melting the snow in front of him.
I am never free of your questions, am I? I have no clue where we are specifically, but I would guess that this is a twisted product of Potter's mind. I do not know what deal he brokered with that infernal globe.
What?
Gods be praised, something the everlasting Know-It-All hasn't read about? Your idiot friend activated a... modified... puzzle ball. We will be trapped in it until we solve whatever tasks it has given us.
But what-
I would appreciate it greatly if you could save the rest of your interrogation for what passes as morning, Ms. Granger. It pains me, but I promise to answer all of your questions then.
Alright. Goodnight, sir.
Goodnight.
Sir, would you please keep your tail to yourself?
I've no idea what you're talking about, Ms. Granger. Goodnight.
Hope you liked it. I am working on the next part, but my inspiration seems to have run away. Reward of points to your respective house if you find it. Thanks.