Disclaimer: I don' own Harry Potter (munching on hot dog) yup
THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS!!!
YamiYumes: lol hey was wondering, am I stereotypical with the hippie thing?
sexAy-iranian23: lol lets switch schools then...(blink) uh you didn't need to know that lol, kidding heehee
Lillei: lol thanks!
Inylan: heehee, I might have put in some H/D pornstar thing in this here chappy...read and find out lol
xXxIce.PrincessxXx: every review counts! well...except flames lol soz if this took long!
Psi: hmmm....it could be a disease....
Shui-Wing0: a trick? Hmmm....reading the story? Or waiting patiently? Lol that was weird lol
Willowstar: thank you!
LaraBlack: (gawk) ya lost yer cat!?
WINk: I sneaked in a love scene but it's barely detailed...
yuranda: lol I luv the peace sign too, thanks for reviewing!
Sowen: yay thanks!
Eternal Spark: randomness in the chapter, you might get what you wanted...lol
The Kid In The Corner: wow thank you! BIG ASS BEAR HUG!!!
SlytherinGrlForever: (starry eyed) maaan bye the end of this fic I'm gonna feel so conceited someone will shoot me lol
heart and soul: updated! thanks!
speed2: updating...now! (presses updating button) lol
HOnEySky: - hope you like the new chappy!
Spidermonkey-Demon: (sniff) thanks!
Robin the bird: I want gumballs too (pout)
Kikirini-chan: I won't switch scenes again (evil laugh) maybe...
Swiftrunner: Draco asked it out of curiousity, I think (eyes Draco who tries to look suspicious) anyway, soz I updated (hangs head) but in a way, I get two weeks off (me going to Venezuela in August...the horror) so we're sort of even...I think....
oOWeasleyWizardWheezesOo: yay (dances so badly it could mean apocalypse) hope ya like da new chappy!
Falcon Zanbandia of Nightmares: woohoo! Here's the update!
JesPaiTha: Heehee I made a longer scene with the mystery dude!
coriander: I do!? (shares gumballs) happy chewing! lol
Chang Wumei: Maybe I should draw Dumbly in those clothes (ponders) but I need to learn how to draw old people lol
Ryan's-heart's-desire: Tom Felton! (eyes turn into hearts) lucky (beep!) lol
sennia35: There's more randomness here!
Angel-Wings6: wow really!? BIG HUGGIES!!!!!
The future Mrs Ja rule: lol again with the long 'hahaha's lol here's the new chappy!
PotionsPet: thanks! lol
thedarkside45: yummy gumballs yurp! lol thank you!
corae: I have to finish it if there's gonna be a sequel...hee
Isis-mystic: yeah I think you spelt it right...but I'm kinda cruddy with spelling things lol
Morwen and the little one: lol ok Morwen's probably gonna torture me because the sex scenes in this chappy are barely detailed....(runs and hides)
Beautiful Willow: here's the update, enjoy!
(cries) Man I never thought I'd get so many reviews for this but (sniffs) thank you guys! Anyway, enough of my drama side here's da deal, THERE'S LOTS OF RANDOMNESS IN THIS CHAPPY! Enjoy! -
Todays Thoughts!
'blah' = Pansy's thoughts
'blah' = Draco's thoughts
'blah' = Draco's inner mind thoughts
Chapter Twelve: Sweet Week
Tuesday-NOW He Realizes It! (sigh)
"Hey! Draco!" Harry called from the door of the basement.
"What!?" the blond shouted, a bit mad at being interrupted from his small session of eating candy.
"We need more of those gumballs! It's like a war up here!"
"Alright fine," he whipped out his wand, and waved it to an open crate. A bag of gumballs floated out, he flicked the wand to the door and the gumballs flew into Harry's hands.
"Thank you, buu," Harry walked away.
"Yeah whatever," Draco proceeded to munch on a chocolate covered peanut bar. He froze when he realized what Harry said. "Buu?" he craned his neck to the door, shrugged and continued to eat his bar.
He stopped again when he realized something else. He looked at his wand in shock and waved it to a crate, it floated.
"HOLY SHIT!" he shot up and hit his head on a low ceiling. He ignored the blinding pain and looked at his wand with sheer joy, he could finally do magic in the basement! "WOOOHOOOO!!!! YEAH BABY!"
Harry looked at the closed door that lead to the basement. 'Hm, he must be jacking off.' He proceeded to refill the empty jars.
Wednesday (wow Tuesday went by quickly)-Shag Away!
"It is finished mwahahahahaha!!!" cackled Blaise, raising the disk in the air.
"Great, wonderful," Colin clapped sarcastically, "can we shag now?"
"Yeah ok," he threw the disk behind him and dashed to the horny Gryffindor.
"He's on the Daily Prophet!" Pansy burst in the bedroom and blushed like a cherry when she saw Blaise ripping the clothes off of Colin.
"Who?" the Slytherin devoured his lovers neck.
"U-uhm...what?" it was kind of hard for her to think straight with two good looking guys ready to fuck the blinking daylights out of each other were getting busy right in front of her.
"Yeah...ooooh!...Who's oooon the Pro-(gasp)-phet?" Colin barely got out since most of his attention was on the Slytherin rubbing himself against him.
"Oh uh...it's the uh...guy! Who um switched those um-things!" she held the newspaper tightly in her hands to try and calm herself. 'Ack! Why am I acting like such an innocent little schoolgirl!'
"Prankster?" Blaise asked before closing his mouth over Colin's erection, sucking on it mercilessly.
"OOOH!!!" Colin cried out, arching his back.
"Y-yeah..." she began to imagine herself and Ron in the same state, 'shit! I'm getting wet again!' her eyes were glued on the couple and she felt something wet crawl down her nostril, she touched it and examined it then ran away to get a tissue. She got a nosebleed.
"Hmm," Blaise licked his lips and gave Colin a heated kiss, "wonder why she ran away."
"Dunno," Colin undressed the Slytherin, "but I know I want you inside me," he grinned.
'Ok, now that I'm back to normal,' Pansy thought as she walked out of the Slytherin dungeons, the Daily Prophet clutched in her hand and her nose stuffed with a tissue, 'I'd better show this to the others.'
"Peace and love."
"What?" she looked around but didn't hear anything else, she shrugged it off and went on down the corridor.
"Stop the hate."
"Alright who's there?" she stopped again but didn't see anyone else.
"Power to the people."
"Professor Dumbledore?" she squeaked nervously even though she knew the voice did not compare to the headmasters. The voice was young and sort of deep not to mention insane.
"Save the earth."
"Eep!" she shrank in fear then bolted through the halls and out of the castle, hearing echoing laughter. 'Calm down, caaaalm down...I SAID CALM DOWN BITCH!' she stopped a few yards away from the school and breathed deeply, "ok," she then ran her ass off to Hogsmeade.
"Who is stealing my stash!" Hermione yelled to the common room that was barely full at all since nearly everyone left for Christmas that morning. Her second stash had gone missing.
Ron calmly put down his book (yes he was reading), stood up, straightened his shirt and ran the bloody fuck out of Gryffindor Tower.
"RON GET BACK HERE NOW!" Hermione ran after him.
"NO WAY WOMAN!" he yelled, running through the corridor, hoping he'd make it to wherever he was going alive.
"GIVE ME BACK MY STASH YOU ASS FUCKING MOLESTER!"
Ron nearly stopped. "Molester!? WELL YOU'RE SO ADDICTED TO GUMBALLS; YOU'D CHEW ON THE BALLS OF A MAN!"
"SO WHAT!? AT LEAST I'D GET SOME!"
"ARGH!" the red head tripped over his foot and skidded across the hall. "YOU SLUT!"
Hermione took out her wand and stood over him. "Give me my stash," she growled dangerously.
"I don't have it!" he looked at the wand fearfully.
"Then," her face fell and she looked like she'd go in hysterics, "why'd you make me chase you!?"
"I wanted to get away from you before you'd blow up and grab the nearest thing to destroy," he pointed himself, "me!"
"Oh...well...ok then," she walked away leaving a gawking Ron.
"Ah! Salvation!" cried Pansy, once she reached Honeydukes. She swung the door open and was surprised to see the shop full of jumpy giddy girls and boys.
The Slytherinette raised an eyebrow when the girl next to her fainted, she went on through the crowd, wanting to know why so many people were here.
"Oh...dear god," she breathed when she reached the front. 'My second dream come true!' she blushed brightly and felt her nosebleed start up again.
Harry and Draco were on the counter, butt ass naked, shagging each other senseless. There were cries and begs coming out from each of them and a few more girls, maybe some boys too, fainted.
'Harry and Draco the porn stars, I'm so proud,' Pansy thought amusedly, forgetting about the Prophet completely. She looked around at the audience and gaped when she spotted Theodore Nott right next to her.
"Hey," he whispered to her, "d'you think they'd fancy a threesome?"
Her eyes widened and jaw dropped almost literally to the ground mainly because Theodore was as straight as a stick and because he had a girlfriend.
"Wow," she muttered, turning back to the shagging couple, "impressive."
"Harder! Deeper!" cried Harry.
Thursday-Drama Strikes Again!
Everyone must be on the look out for Jederkus Tye, an ex criminal gone back to crime. He has been last been seen in Hogsmeade where he has been secretly switching the Zonko's and Honeydukes orders. Aurors have searched Zonkos products and found hidden Heroine (a muggle drug) which must have been Tye's doing.
He is wanted for illegal drug smuggling, murder, and use of illegal curses.
Below was a picture of the man, he was young, with brown slightly tamed hair, deep blue eyes, and a mysteriously insane face...pretty much a hot guy if you ask the author...
"Oooh so this is the guy who pretended to be a poor man," Harry said once he finished reading the newspaper. Draco walked over to the door and switched the sign from Open to Closed.
"Now what?" he asked turning back to the group. "He's a murderer, there's no freaking way I'm chasing after him."
"Yeah well, Blaise made this weird gadget that can help us catch him, he just needs to fix a few glitches on it because he threw it and it kinda broke," she blushed when she remembered about yesterday.
"Oh...but I don't get it, what's the blokes' motivation? Why's he doing all this?" Ron asked curiously.
"He's probably crazy," Hermione said from what she called 'Hermione's Area' which was where the gumballs were at.
"OH! We can do magic in the basement now!" Draco piped happily, "I just found out a few days ago!"
Harry blinked. "Took you long enough."
"Whatcha mean?" the blond eyed him.
'He means you're a dumbass.'
'I thought you left.'
'Neva did, I was too busy watching you two shag.'
'Oh...can you, like, shut up now.'
'....Cock sucking bastard.'
'Thank you.'
"We did magic down there when we first met that Tye person, he must have undone the deflecting charm," Harry shrugged.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I thought you knew."
"Well I didn't."
"Ok then."
Draco was about to say something else but didn't and just contemplated on sitting on the boys' lap.
"Ok...getting back on the subject," Pansy said, getting everyone's attention...well, maybe not Hermione, she was busy making a third stash. "I think this hippie thing's connected to Jederkus Tye."
Everyone stared at her and laughed, then nodded as they thought about.
"True...I almost lost my dignity from that letter...maybe it was from him..." Harry pondered. Pansy gave him the 'uh duh' look.
"We'll have to be careful the next time that happens, I for one am NOT gonna let myself get tricked, distracted, or become a human bat like Parvati!" Ron eyed Hermione but she was too busy with her gumballs to notice. Pansy sighed, conjured a porn magazine and let it hover before him. "Porn magazine! Mine!" he snatched it and glued his eyes on the pictures.
"Hey look," Draco pointed amusedly, "he's getting hard."
"He's what?" Pansy looked at the growing bulge on the oblivious red heads pants; she didn't take her eyes off it.
"So anyway," Harry finally spoke, "we know who the guy is, he's somewhere here in Hogsmeade, and Blaise has this thing that'll find him...what do we do now?"
"Wait for Blaise to fix his blasted thingy," shrugged Hermione, blowing a large bubble with her gumball.
An owl swooped through the door and dropped a letter on Harry's lap and left. Draco and the raven head looked at the letter fearfully.
Harry held up the letter and shakily read out loud, "'Dear Mr. Potter and Mr. Malfoy, in a few days the Ministry of Magic will be sending over a group of aurors,' oh god! 'for an inspection due to the criminal, Jederkus Tye. Sincerely Cornelius Fudge.'"
"Oh what horrible news!" Draco said dramatically, on the point of fainting.
"Burn it! Burn it and bury it!" Harry threw the letter to the floor.
"Oh god," Hermione sighed exasperatedly, "you sons of bitches are the most dramatic pair I've ever met, grow up!"
Friday-Snape A Hippie!?
The mysterious...ok not so mysterious, man sat in his chair enjoying a blueberry muffin, watching the tv screens while taking care of his joystick...once again.
"'Orny ba'tards, 'ey are. Hm! An' on Chist'as 'oo!" he said through his stuffed mouth, watching as Colin and Blaise went through an orgasm, he looked at a different tv.
This one had Pansy opening her presents happily. The man took a closer look and pumped himself faster when he notice exactly what Pansy got for Christmas.
He swallowed his food. "Damn! Either her family's sex crazed or her friends are helping her get lucky...maybe the latter...yeah," he took another bite of his muffin. "Mmm...gooood."
He looked at another screen. His eyes widened when he saw Harry and Draco doing naughty things with the Christmas presents they gave each other.
"Whoa! Too strong even for me!" he looked away then glanced back; he was pretty much staring at the couple for what seemed to be hours before he came back to his senses. He looked down and realized he was harder than ever. "NO! NO, NO NOOO! I like women! Naked women!" he forced himself to look away.
The next one was barely as interesting as the one from before, it just had Ron napping, he looked like he was clutching something that wasn't really there.
The next one had Hermione searching the dorm desperately for her third missing stash.
"Bwahahahahaaaa! Keep searching sweet cheeks!" he laughed, patting three small bags full off gumballs on his right, "you'll neeeeva find 'em."
He came unexpectedly. The man blinked at his deflating size then cleaned his hand with a napkin that lay on his desk.
"Well then," he said, taking a quill and dipping it in ink. "Potter didn't work out very well so the next shall be," he looked down at his list of victims then at the tv screens, he grinned and circled a name, "her...ahahahahahaaa-ehhhh it's not that funny..."
He looked at one of the screens and whipped out his wand, he flicked it on a tv and it changed uh...channels...
"Lets see how the greasy haired git is doing," he grinned looking at the screen. "...Lord kill him now..." he breathed when he watched Snape check himself out in front of a mirror.
What scared any future boners off him was that Snape was dressed in hippie clothes, flashing peace signs at his reflections. "I wonder..." the potions professor said to himself, turning and looking at the reflection of his bum, "do these pants make my arse look too big?"
The man fell off his chair in a dead faint.
Soz if it was short or...something else...I had I bit of a writers block for this one, but now I have a pretty good idea for the next chapter! Review please!