KANKUROU'S GROWTH SPURTS
Hi! THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR REVIEWS! BIG grin!! I love you all! I didn't think anyone would like this fic so much, since it was kind of corny and pointless. BUT YOU DID! And I only got one flamer! I'M SO HAPPY! I feel loved! But, unfortunatly, this is the last chapter. sob. I am sorry. I still love you all, but I started running out of ideas. I made a buncha lotta friends with this smiles cuz I respond to as many reviews as I can, TY! review this, too!
Chapter Five: Conspiracy Revealed
"That was fun!" Temari cried, walking home with her brothers and Naruto. The two younger boys dragged their feet, their arms hanging uselessly at their sides.
"Speak for yourself," Gaara snapped.
Kankurou, who had, as he said before, gotten better at doing yoga, just grinned at them. "It's not so bad."
Temari rolled her eyes. "Sure, it is," she said coldly, opening the door to their apartment.
"Are you sure this is worth it?" Gaara hissed at Naruto as they headed down the hall.
"Is what worth it?" Temari frowned.
"Erm ... Nothing," Naruto said innocently, putting his hands on the small of his back and pushing, drawing several grotesque noises from his protesting back.
"That wasn't a nothing, nothing," Temari said, frowning. "That was a something, nothing."
"No, it wasn't," Gaara said through a scoff, going down the hall.
"Hold it." Kankurou grabbed both of them by the backs of their shirts and yanked them back onto the sofa.
"What is going on?" Temari asked suspiciously.
"Nothing," both said at once.
The two older ninjas looked at each other, then went into a huddle at the other end of the room, as if plotting whether or not they should question them or threaten them. Kankurou, of course, was leaning towards threats. Gaara and Naruto, meanwhile, were in a huddle of their own.
"We should just tell them," Gaara said. "We're running out of ideas, anyway. Sooner or later, they're going to realize he hasn't had a growth spurt or anything."
"How could they find out?"
"There's this thing called a measuring stick. Anyway, lets just tell them. This is boring."
"The last idea was yours, though."
"That's beside the point," Gaara snapped, two minuscule pink spits appearing on his cheeks.
"Ok, fine, we'll tell them," Naruto mumbled, with a look of defeat.
At the same time, Kankurou had won Temari over, saying that threats of torture always worked on kids their ages. Completely ignoring her questions of how he knew this for a fact, he made his way back to the two younger ninjas.
But before Kankurou could say anything, Naruto cried, "Ok, ok, we'll talk!"
Temari and Kankurou exchanged glances. "Ok..." they said slowly.
Naruto signed the sigh of one revealing his most treasured secrets. "I know why Kankurou had been losing and gaining so much weight."
"Eh?" Kankurou's painted-over eyebrow skyrocketed.
"You can explain any time now," Temari said, thoroughly confused.
"Um..." Naruto looked around nervously. "IT WAS ALL GAARA!" he shouted, pointing at that poor little red head desperately.
"WHAT, now?" Gaara said loudly, glaring at him. He briefly contemplated the fact that, if he murdered a certain demon vessel, no one would know, because no one knew where he was. Oh wait. Temari and Kankurou would know. CRAP.
"Gaara?" Temari and Kankurou said together, starring at their brother.
"Hey, I only thought up the whole 'lets make Kankurou taller' bit; the rest was his," Gaara said coldly.
"How dare you betray your master, Grasshopper!" Naruto shouted, getting in Gaara's face.
"Grasshopper?" Kankurou said quietly, his eyebrow twitching.
"How dare YOU not take responsibility for your own actions, MASTER?" Gaara shouted back, getting his Naruto's face so that their foreheads touched, both of them pushing for dominance. (Oh shut up, I know that sounded wrong!)
"Master?" Temari said, just as quietly.
"WHAT?!" both ninjas shouted, whirling around to glare at Kankurou and Temari.
"N-Nothing..." they squeaked, waving their hands before their eyes.
Gaara and Naruto went back to bashing heads.
Suddenly, a large fan slammed down between them and opened, blocking them from each other's view. "I don't care who did it, the point is that both of you had a part in it."
Kankurou nodded, scowling, his arms crossed. "That's right, T—"
"And it was pure genius!" Temari cried, pulling her fan out of the semi- large crater it had formed. "How did you figure out what to do?"
Kankurou fell over anime-style. "TEMARI!" he whined, jumping up, a large bump forming under his hood.
"Well, you told us to amuse ourselves," Naruto said, shrugging. "So, we did."
"... I feel so used," Kankurou mumbled. "Can I have my clothes back?"
"Er..." The two younger ninjas glanced at each other. "Eh-heh-heh, um ... Kankurou?"
Kankurou felt a cold sweat trickle down the back of his neck. "What?"
"We kind of ..." Naruto looked at Gaara for help.
"We destroyed them," Gaara said emotionlessly, although Kankurou just had a brief spell in which he temporarily died.
"No, we di—" Naruto winced as Gaara elbowed him in the ribs, an action which clearly said "Shut up! Work with me!"
"We still have the sumo-wrestler clothes, though," Gaara said, by means of assisting. "Those fit."
"See, it's ok, Kankurou," Temari said, smiling. "We'll just take them out and have them—You're not listening, are you?"
Kankurou wandered away down the hall, mumbling to himself about something that sounded oddly like "elephant skin," staring at the floor.
"Hey—Ka—Kankurou!" Temari called after him. "Kankurou, watch—KANKUROU, STOP!"
He wasn't listening.
THUD.
Kankurou groaned, sliding down the wall he'd run into, and stayed there.
"Do you wanna get him, or should I?" Temari asked, looking at the two boys.
"Hey, we bathed him! You—y'all have fun," Naruto said, grinning and backing up.
"Yes, ah, all of the above," Gaara said, backing up, as well.
"Ok, come on, fatso," she mumbled, grabbing Kankurou's arm and yanking up, a mental note to keep a lock and a seal on her wardrobe formulating in her mind.
(A/N: Ok, all done! Actually, it's more that I ran out of ideas to torture Kankurou with, like I said before. Also, I have a secret; while you all were begging for me to get to work on this, I had all the chappies planned out and written. Don't you just hate me? Nah, y'all love me. Right? ... right? RIGHT? suddenly feels nervous.)